Douluo Continent: Getting Stronger After Heartbreak

Chapter 54 Never Let Go

"Dad...you...you said that Brother Jian's Ocean Tears haven't fallen off?"

Ning Rongrong's eyes widened slightly, and even her tears flowed more slowly.

Ning Fengzhi nodded and said, "You know the properties of the Ocean's Tear. This means that Qin Jian's feelings for you have never changed. He still loves you and has never thought of giving you up."

"Is that really...so?"

Ning Rongrong was stunned.

"But I haven't changed towards him either, so why did my Ocean Tear separate from him?" she asked, looking at the Ocean Tear in her hand.

Ning Fengzhi thought for a moment and said, "Rongrong, this is the difference between you and Qin Jian, and it's also where you fall short of him in this relationship."

"Where I am inferior to him..."

Ning Rongrong asked urgently, "What is that?"

Ning Fengzhi said, "That is self-awareness and belief in the future."

"Do you know what you really want? Do you know what you want to do in the future? Are you really sure you want to spend your life with Qin Jian?"

Ning Fengzhi's series of questions stunned Ning Rongrong: "What do I really want... do I really want to spend my whole life with Brother Jian...?"

She was lost in thought.

"While you were still in the throes of first love and hazy feelings of youth, Qin Jian had already seen through the illusions of the world."

Ning Fengzhi continued, "He knows what he wants and how to do it. He is very certain of where his feelings lie and knows what his greatest pursuit in life is. He has never doubted his feelings, so his feelings for you have not changed at all."

Even though he was temporarily separated from you, he still firmly believed that you two had a future, which is why he was able to keep Ocean's Tears from leaving.

Ning Fengzhi gently wiped away her tears and said softly, "And you, Rongrong, you just had doubts. You lacked confidence in your relationship with him. You didn't trust him, you didn't trust yourself, and you even doubted the future. How can you expect to gain the approval of the Ocean's Tears like this?"

Ning Rongrong stared blankly at the beautiful, shimmering Ocean Tear in her palm.

"So it was because I didn't believe it myself...?"

Tears welled up in her eyes again, but she forced them back.

"Dad, I know what I need to do..."

She smiled gently at Ning Fengzhi.

That smile looked sweet, but it made Ning Fengzhi's heart skip a beat.

Is this the price of growing up...?

I've learned to hide my emotions and to understand the feelings of my loved ones...

"Dad, once I've merged with the Tear of the Ocean again, I'll go find him again..."

"By then, even if it's to the ends of the earth, I will be with him!"

She gripped the Tear of the Ocean tightly in her hand, her eyes so resolute that Ning Fengzhi almost didn't recognize her.

"Rongrong..."

Ning Fengzhi patted her thin shoulders and said, "Now that you've figured it out, work hard! Thanks to the tulips Qin Jian gave you, your soul power has increased to level 27, and more importantly, your martial soul has transformed into the Nine Treasure Glazed Tile Pagoda!"

He said solemnly, "This is a miracle that Qin Jian brought you, so you can't let him down, understand?"

"The Nine-Jeweled Glazed Pagoda..."

Ning Rongrong raised her left hand, and her martial spirit appeared.

As she watched, tears suddenly streamed down her face: "Brother Jian, thank you..."

"There's one more thing, also left to you by Qin Jian. Take a look for yourself."

Ning Fengzhi placed the letter left by Qin Jian in Ning Rongrong's hand, then pulled Sword Douluo away from there.

He has said what he needed to say and done what he could do. Now it is up to Ning Rongrong to think for herself and to determine her own feelings.

This is a path everyone must walk themselves; no one can walk it for them…

"The letter my brother Jian left for me..."

Ning Rongrong carefully opened the envelope and found a purple card inside.

Unlike ordinary letter paper, which is only a thin layer, it is about an inch thick.

Ning Rongrong gently opened it, and suddenly melodious music from the guzheng and xun (ancient Chinese wind instrument) filled the air.

Soon, a familiar song drifted out: "The moon shines bright, flowers bloom on the branches... someone is filled with longing..."

She immediately covered her mouth, her eyes blurry with tears: "This is... my performance with Brother Jian, 'Thoughts of Separation'..."

The heart-wrenching singing voice, when heard again, was even more moving than when it was practiced.

Because Ning Rongrong finally understood that beauty, that longing, and that helplessness.

She looked down at the neat handwriting on the letter.

"Rongrong, by the time you read this letter, I will have already left the Seven Treasure Glazed Tile School..."

"I'm sorry I didn't say goodbye in person, because I knew I would have been reluctant to leave..."

"I know you have many questions, and may even harbor a lot of resentment..."

Ning Rongrong subconsciously shook her head.

Even so, she never harbored the slightest resentment towards Qin Jian.

"There are some things I can't tell you, because those are the rules."

"But no matter how heartbroken or how sad you are, I will bear it with you..."

"I don't know when it started, but you've become like a part of my body, something I can never let go of..."

"I really don't want to leave you, but fate is so cruel..."

Sometimes I wonder if my presence is a burden to you. If it weren't for me, you would still be that spoiled and willful little girl...

"You will grow up happily, you will meet a boy you like, and you will... marry someone else..."

Ning Rongrong shook her head vigorously, tears streaming down her face.

"Rongrong... I truly hope that my presence brings you only joy and happiness... I truly hope you can be even happier than when I wasn't around..."

"I like you so much..."

Originally, I wanted to write: If you're unsure about your feelings, if your heart has changed, if you've fallen for someone else, then let go of this relationship...

"But as I wrote these words, my heart ached so much, it hurt so much..."

"Rongrong, this is the first time I've felt physical pain in my heart. It's not something imposed by my mind; it's real heartache..."

"And so I knew, I can't live without you..."

"So, I've revised this passage..."

"Whether you understand your own heart in the future or not, and whether you are attracted to others..."

"I, Qin Jian, will never let go!"

"Wait for me, one day I will marry you!"

"Because you are my fiancée!"

"..."

Ning Rongrong laughed, then cried.

She slowly squatted down and carefully held the letter in her arms.

"Brother Jian... Rongrong would never change her mind... Rongrong is waiting for you to marry me..."

The singing continued endlessly from the phonograph box.

"To share a smile and a frown with you..."

"Give me a gift of enduring longing..."

Sigrún has taught at the Iceland University of the Arts as a part-time lecturer since and was Dean of the Department of Fine Art from -. In – she held a research position at Reykjavík Art Museum focusing on the role of women in Icelandic art. She studied fine art at the Icelandic College of Arts and Crafts and at Pratt Institute, New York, and holds BA and MA degrees in art history and philosophy from the University of Iceland. Sigrún lives and works in Iceland.

P.S.: For plot discussions and silly group chats, join group 9946-11995.

(End of this chapter)