The Dumb Prince of the Ming Dynasty

early morning.

It's already summer, and the heat rises as soon as the sun comes out.

Li Jinglong lay sprawled on a bamboo chair, instructing his maid, "Where's the melon? The one hanging in the well should be completely cold by now."

The maidservant ran off and brought up a perfectly round watermelon from the well.

Li Jinglong directed, "Cut it into big chunks, take a big bite for maximum satisfaction. Yesterday we spent the whole day gossiping in the palace, today we're just enjoying gossip at home. Life is just about eating gossip one after another."

"Brother," Li Zengzhi approached, "Aren't you going to the palace today?"

Li Jinglong, with an air of nonchalant satisfaction, said, "Everything's over. Just wait to collect your reward."

Li Zengzhi leaned closer, his face full of gossip: "Big brother, is what happened between you and Hai Li true?"

"Holy crap, what gossip did you hear?" Li Jinglong had a bad feeling.

"It's all over." Li Zengzhi shrugged. "They're saying you captured Hai Li because you were lusting after her."

Li Jinglong sat bolt upright: "Who spread this rumor? Which bastard spread it? How could it become such a wild rumor?"

This script is wrong, how did I become the sleazy male lead?

"Brother, tell me more about it," Li Zengzhi said expectantly.

"Li Zengzhi, your elder brother is being slandered. Instead of helping me dispel the rumors, why are you asking around?"

"Brother, how can I dispel the rumors for you without knowing the details?"

Li Jinglong waved his hand: "Get lost!"

Li Zengzhi shrugged: "Brother, it's fine if you don't want to tell me. I'll tell my future sister-in-law later. I reckon Sister Yuan has probably heard about it too, since it's all over the capital."

"Hai Li and I are innocent!" Li Jinglong cursed. "Who spread that rumor? I'll beat him to death!"

Just then, a maidservant brought over a slice of melon and bowed, saying, "Young master, have some melon!"

Li Jinglong stood up: "What melon? I've become the melon myself, I'm going to the palace."

"What are you going to the palace for?"

"Prove my innocence, find out who's behind this, let me find out, and have them hung up and beaten."

……

As Li Jinglong walked, he reviewed the events in his mind.

The only person who said those words in the Qianqing Palace yesterday was Zhu Yuanzhang.

You old Zhu, I worked so hard to help you solve the case, and I was so scared by the murder that I fainted on the spot. When I woke up, you wanted to stuff a mouthful of tofu pudding into my mouth, and you still talked about me behind my back.

When they arrived at the main gate of Qianqing Palace, Wang Jinghong was on duty. When he saw Li Jinglong coming over, he covered his mouth with his whisk and smiled.

"Eunuch Wang, stop laughing." Li Jinglong rolled his eyes. "Tell me honestly, is it His Majesty spreading rumors about me?"

Wang Jinghong shook his head: "Our family doesn't know anything."

Li Jinglong was speechless: "Father-in-law, we've been partners in solving cases together before, so don't hide anything from me."

"In all these years in the palace, I've learned one thing: the more you talk, the faster you die," Wang Jinghong said.

"Look at your cowardice! I'll go settle accounts with the Emperor myself." Li Jinglong waved his hand and entered the gate of Qianqing Palace.

Upon arriving at the main hall, they saw Zhu Yuanzhang reviewing memorials.

"Your subject Li Jinglong pays his respects to Your Majesty." Li Jinglong bowed.

Zhu Yuanzhang didn't even look up: "Stand aside, I'll talk to you later."

Li Jinglong pursed his lips and walked to the side to wait.

I'm going to have a serious talk with you today.

They're emperors now, why are they spreading rumors about their subjects?

I haven't even gotten married yet. If you spread this word, how am I supposed to explain it to the Yuan family?

It ruined my image of being wise and mighty.

Pay compensation and apologize.

At this moment, Zhu Yuanzhang suddenly slammed his pen on the table and roared, "What does Xu Yikui mean by this? Is he mocking us?"

Li Jinglong was caught off guard and was startled.

"Come and take a look." Zhu Yuanzhang looked up.

Li Jinglong leaned over to take a look, and one of the sentences on the memorial was circled: "Under the bright sky, a sage is born to set an example for the world."

Isn't this just flattery? The wording is sophisticated, and the intention is lofty.

"Is something wrong with this?" he wondered.

Zhu Yuanzhang snorted coldly: "Guang means bald, Sheng means monk, and Ze means thief. He's mocking us for having been a monk and a thief."

Li Jinglong's mouth dropped open.

Is he just bald?

Born a monk?

So he's a thief?

Holy crap, Your Majesty, is that how you understand it?

Did puns already exist in the Ming Dynasty?

"Damn it!" Zhu Yuanzhang grew angrier the more he looked. "This is utter disrespect! We must issue an edict to execute him!"

Li Jinglong was dumbfounded: "Your Majesty, at most a pun will result in a fine, not beheading, right?"

"Shut up!" Zhu Yuanzhang said coldly. "These scholars, openly and subtly mocking us, really think we're too old to wield a sword?"

Li Jinglong sensed the murderous aura emanating from Zhu Yuanzhang.

Are you really going to kill someone? Your Majesty, aren't you being overly sensitive?

……

Zhu Yuanzhang took a sip of tea, his anger subsiding somewhat, and asked, "What brings you here today?"

Li Jinglong: "Uh..."

What am I here for? Yes, I'm here to settle accounts with this old man, to make him pay me back, to make him apologize, and to clear my name.

Even Fish Leong can't give me courage now.

A minister was beheaded for using a pun, so what's the big deal about you spreading rumors about him?

"It's nothing," he said sincerely. "I just missed His Majesty at home, so I came to the palace to see you."

Zhu Yuanzhang snorted, "Why are you just sitting at home doing nothing? You've finished investigating the case, so you're not doing any work anymore?"

"Your Majesty, I am not in the period of mourning," Li Jinglong said aggrievedly.

"I know," Zhu Yuanzhang waved his hand. "But you can't just sit idle. Didn't we give you the job of Junior Chamberlain of the Eastern Palace? When you have time, go to the Eastern Palace and teach Yunwen how to ride and shoot. That kid isn't very strong, so you should take care of him more."

Li Jinglong's face fell: "The case has just been investigated, shouldn't I rest for a couple of days? Look at my dark circles, I had nightmares last night and was woken up several times by Hesa'er's face."

"I know you've done a great job investigating this case," Zhu Yuanzhang said with a smile. "Here's what I'll give you: there's an estate at the foot of Zhongshan Mountain."

Li Jinglong couldn't believe it: "Really?"

"Haven't you always wanted an estate?" Zhu Yuanzhang said. "We said before that I would reward you after the case was solved. A ruler's word is his bond."

Li Jinglong immediately knelt down and said, "Your Majesty, I thank you for your great kindness."

"That estate is wonderful. You should tidy it up properly when you have time, and we can go there to enjoy the cool air sometime." Zhu Yuanzhang smiled slightly.

"Huh?" Li Jinglong looked wary. "I have a feeling I've been tricked."

Zhu Yuanzhang glared at him: "We're giving you an estate, and you're still falling for it? What kind of talk is that!"

Li Jinglong grew increasingly uneasy: "Your Majesty, once the estate is built, you're not planning to take it for free, are you?"

"The estate is yours now, so it's yours. I'm the emperor, why would I need your estate?" Zhu Yuanzhang said speechlessly.

Li Jinglong still looked doubtful.

Zhu Yuanzhang grew impatient and waved his hand dismissively: "You don't want it? Then we'll take it back."

"Yes, yes, yes!" Li Jinglong exclaimed repeatedly.

Zhu Yuanzhang looked disgusted and said, "You have such a bad attitude; you're nothing like your father."

"I am the father, and I am the son," Li Jinglong said with a smile. "Your Majesty, I shall take my leave. I will take my younger brother to see the estate."

Zhu Yuanzhang watched his retreating figure and smiled slyly.