Water Margin: I am Zhu Biao

The Grand Commandant's residence was guarded by imperial guards, and there were also gatekeepers inside.

There are four gates at the back gate, with guards rotating every three hours. The location of the front gate is unknown.

Zhu Biao encountered a servant boy of about seventeen or eighteen years old. Upon seeing him, the boy's nose almost reached the sky, and he actually reached out his hand.

"Two coins, or you won't be crossing that threshold today."

He glanced sideways at Zhu Biao and pointed to the vermilion threshold at the end of the porch, which was a foot high.

"Brother, Brother Yang Bo only gave me this much money when he came. Next time, I will definitely make it up to you."

Zhu Biao, with a fawning expression, handed him a string of two hundred coins with both hands.

Snapped!

The servant slapped the hanging money to the ground.

"Who does Yang Bo think he is! He gives those thieves five hundred coins to the conscripts, but only two hundred to me. Who does he think he is?"

Damn it! This brat is really hard to deal with!

As Zhu Biao bent down to pick up the money, he was cursing under his breath. The seven men in the group shared five hundred coins, while he alone got two hundred coins, and he was still not satisfied.

"Brother, I... I have another piece of silver here."

Zhu Biao rummaged in his pocket for a long time before finally pulling out a tiny, almost imperceptible piece of silver, probably worth about half a coin.

He handed the money, along with the string of coins, to the servant.

"Young master, no, young master, I will definitely bring enough tribute next time."

The servant's expression finally softened; he put away the money and gave a cold snort.

"Go back and tell that bastard Yang Bo to keep his eyes open in the future. Come with me, and remember to keep your head down when you come in. Don't look around."

"Yes, yes."

After walking around the screen wall for less than a hundred paces, Zhu Biao suddenly let out a loud fart, and his face immediately tightened.

"Excuse me, sir, I... I really need to pee."

"What?"

The servant's expression also changed, and he gritted his teeth and cursed:

"You son of a bitch, clench your ass tight! If a single drop of your poop or pee falls on the ground, I'll beat you to death!"

The ground of the Grand Commandant's mansion was paved with spotless white marble bricks.

If someone were to actually defecate on it, it wouldn't be a matter of dirtiness, but rather a matter of the Grand Commandant's reputation.

It's estimated that Zhu Biao will be beaten to a pulp or killed, all the bricks in the vicinity will have to be replaced, and of course, this door will definitely have to be replaced as well. His final fate will be to be demoted to a menial job.

No matter how luxurious or magnificent a mansion is, even a royal palace, the outhouse is a dead corner.

The outhouses used by servants, in particular, were a deadly blind spot.

Zhu Biao wanted this path, the one that led directly from the servants' outhouse to the inner courtyard of the Gao Yamen.

After a stick of incense had burned, the servant, with a dark face, led Zhu Biao to the entrance of a quiet courtyard, glared at him fiercely, and then knocked on the gate.

"Who?"

A rough, loud voice came from inside the courtyard.

"Thirteenth Brother, it's me, Xiao Liu. That scoundrel Yang Bo sent someone to deliver the allowance to the young master. Please open the door."

At this moment, the servant's demeanor suddenly changed, and Zhu Biao's teeth ached from his fawning tone. Damn it! They're all such good actors.

Squeak!

The courtyard gate was pushed open, revealing a dark face.

This guy was so strong he looked like a gorilla come to life, his bodyguard outfit was almost bursting out of his clothes, and he had a cold and arrogant expression.

He didn't even glance at the doorman, only gave Zhu Biao a brief look, and without saying a word, he stepped aside.

Ha! It's just a showpiece. Zhu Biao almost burst out laughing.

He immediately saw through the gorilla's true nature: it was fat, moved clumsily, and breathed heavily.

He's good at bluffing, but if it really comes down to a fight, he probably can't even beat Zhu Wu. If it's a life-or-death struggle, he'll be a one-hit wonder.

Sure enough, a fake son is a fake son; the old scoundrel Gao Qiu didn't find him a real expert to protect him.

Gao Yanei's villa was a small three-courtyard house. The outer courtyard was inhabited by a gorilla and several servants. Passing through the hanging flower gate, one could see a large, warm well made of blue bricks.

Even in the dead of winter, steam was still bubbling up from the wellhead.

Beside the well, three pretty maids were fishing in the well with short bamboo poles.

"Hahaha! Whoever catches that red koi carp first will be richly rewarded by this young master!"

A tall, thin young man squeezed between them, embracing one on each side, his dog paws constantly moving up and down.

The man was about twenty years old, dressed in a light purple brocade robe with dark patterns, and wearing a silver-gray sable fur coat over it. He had thick eyebrows, a straight nose, and a somewhat handsome face.

With only a pair of narrow, slightly sinister and lewd eyes, he was none other than the playboy Gao Yanei.

Who are you?

Upon seeing Zhu Biao, he seemed quite disappointed; his smile vanished, and his eyes swept over him coldly.

"Greetings, young master. I am Pan San. Brother Yang Bo sent me to deliver the allowance."

Zhu Biao took small steps to get close to him, bowed, lowered his head, and presented the bundle with both hands, his accent changing back to a northern accent.

"Regular allowance? It's not that time yet?"

Gao Yanei frowned slightly and stood still.

"How come I've never seen you before?"

"I'm from the north and only recently came to Tokyo to make a living. I've become a disciple of Brother Yang Bo."

How do you know Yang Bo?

"Yang Bo's second uncle, Yang Shuo, works in the Xiangzhou government office. I asked him for food before."

Gao Yanei's expression softened slightly, but he still didn't move, patting a maid beside him.

"Chuntao, go and bring the bundle over here."

Damn it! Zhu Biao cursed inwardly.

This scoundrel is quite alert; he's not a completely useless bum. Come to think of it, how could that old scoundrel Gao Qiu possibly adopt a fool as his godson?

The next moment, Chun Tao took the bundle and was about to turn back when she heard Gao Yanei shout sternly.

"Open it up where it was! Let's see what's inside!"

Chuntao obediently opened the bundle, roughly counted the contents, and honestly replied:

"Young master, there are some loose silver coins inside, four or five strings of cash, and a jade pendant, totaling about thirty strings of cash."

Upon hearing this, Gao Yanei's wariness vanished, but his face revealed intense anger and impatience.

"Damn it! Is this little bit of money even worth sending over? That bastard Caihuashe, what kind of work is he doing?"

"Young master, don't be angry!"

Zhu Biao bowed even lower, explaining hastily:

"Brother Yang Bo has recently set his sights on a big, fat sheep in Sichuan. He can close the deal in three to five days. He told me to inform him of the good news beforehand."

This is the amount for the monthly allowance at the end of the month.

He opened his palm and spread out his five fingers.

Gao Yanei's eyes lit up. He shoved the two maids aside, strode over, and grabbed Zhu Biao by the collar.

"Five hundred strings of cash?"

"Yes, yes."

Zhu Biao glanced at him quickly, then immediately lowered his eyelids timidly.

At this moment, at this distance, he had a hundred ways to kill this guy instantly, but he couldn't.

He doesn't have three heads and six arms, so he can't break out of the Grand Commandant's mansion. Even if he manages to break out of the Grand Commandant's mansion, he still can't get out of the Golden Water Gate.

"Hahaha! Good, good!"

Gao Yanei burst into laughter and patted him on the shoulder.

"Pan San, is that it? I'll remember you."

As he spoke, he pulled a bronze waist badge made of the Palace Guard from his waist and slapped it on Zhu Biao's chest.

"This young master has been confined to his residence by the Grand Commandant and cannot leave. You can use this token to freely enter and leave the mansion. Report any news immediately."

Zhu Biao pressed down on his waist tag and solemnly declared.

"Yes! I will serve you to the death."

"Hahaha!"

Gao Yanei burst into laughter.

When the servants escorted him out of the mansion, Zhu Biao used the same trick again, squeezing his buttocks and running to the outhouse.

I took the opportunity to memorize every brick, tile, blade of grass, and tree along this path.

When he arrived at the back door, he saw the gatekeeper, Xiao Liu, standing with his hands on his hips, his face as cold as frost, his eyes blazing with fire.

Just now, while waiting for Zhu Biao to defecate, he wasted most of the incense stick's time. As a result, someone came to pay their respects at the door during this time, and he missed paying his door fee.

He wanted to pin this entrance fee on Zhu Biao, and he was going to vent his anger on him.

"You son of a bitch!"

He stormed up to Zhu Biao, ready to confront him.

Snapped!

His face suddenly went numb; he had received a solid slap.

In an instant, he felt dizzy and his face swelled up. He was stunned for several breaths before he came to his senses, his eyes almost popping out of their sockets.

"You bastard! You dare hit me!"

Snapped!

Another slap landed on his other cheek. Xiao Liu's ears started ringing, his legs went weak, and he collapsed to the ground.

His eyes had barely focused when a bronze waist tag was shoved right in front of him.

The four large, bold characters, "Dianqian Sizhi" (殿前司直), almost blinded him.

As a doorman, Xiao Liu knew all too well the significance of this waist badge.

There are only seven in the entire Grand Commandant's mansion, and each holder is a trusted confidant of the Grand Commandant. He cannot afford to offend any of them.

"You, you~"

Xiao Liu was so shocked and frightened that he could barely speak.

Zhu Biao spat a mouthful of phlegm in his face, his tone extremely arrogant.

"You son of a bitch! You bastard, remember to take a detour when you see me from now on, or I'll beat you every time I see you!"

A moment later, Gao Yanei heard his servant report the matter, but simply curled his lip indifferently.

"What a clever lackey who knows how to leverage power and bite back!"

"Five hundred strings of cash, hey, if we add a little more, it will be enough to give my husband a decent birthday gift at the end of the month."

After saying that, he rubbed his chin:

"That scoundrel Lin Chong, even if he doesn't die, is now a wanted criminal by the imperial court."

"Hey, once I get out of here, I'm going to have Zhang Zhenniang's peach all to myself."