Han Ji

"Gongsun Zan's envoy?" Liu Bei's voice was calm.

The guard said, "Yes. He came from Youzhou, and it took him almost a month to get here. He's terribly thin, and his horse died from exhaustion. He said he had urgent business to attend to with the lord, and he collapsed at the city gate, unable to stand up. The guards gave him water, and he recovered after a while."

Liu Bei turned and walked towards the front courtyard. He didn't walk fast, but his strides were long, his robes fluttering in the wind. Peach petals drifted off his shoulders and landed on the ground. "Take him to the main hall. Have someone prepare some food, a bowl of hot porridge and some flatbread. He's traveled a long way and is starving."

The guard clasped his hands in a fist salute, turned around, and ran away.

Liu Bei arrived at the main hall and sat down. Qian Zhao was already standing at the door. He was dressed in plain clothes, with a short sword at his waist, his eyes fixed on the commotion in the courtyard. Qian Zhao's expression was not good; clearly, he had also heard something.

Liu Bei asked, "Zijing, has he arrived?" Qian Zhao replied, "Yes, he has. He's waiting at the door. He ate two flatbreads and drank a bowl of porridge, and his complexion is much better." Liu Bei said, "Bring him in."

Qian Zhao turned and left. After a while, he returned with a middle-aged man.

The man was in his forties, so thin he was practically skin and bones, with high cheekbones and sunken eyes. He wore a tattered robe, covered in mud, the sleeves torn, revealing his arms underneath. He entered the hall, knelt, and performed a deep bow. His knees slammed onto the ground with a dull thud.

"Tian Yu, under the command of General Gongsun of Youzhou, pays his respects to the Grand General."

"Tian Yu? You are Tian Yu?" Liu Bei's voice carried a hint of surprise.

Tian Yu raised his head and looked at Liu Bei. His eyes were bright; although he had been traveling for almost a month and was covered in wounds, his eyes still shone. "General! You still recognize me!"

Liu Bei stood up, walked over, and bent down to help him up. He grasped Tian Yu's arm; Tian Yu's arm was thin, skin and bones, but the muscles were still firm—a result of long periods of riding and fighting. "Mr. Tian, ​​get up. What brings Brother Gongsun here?"

Tian Yu stood up, his legs trembling. He could barely stand and had to grab onto a nearby pillar. His hands were shaking too, his knuckles white. "General, General Gongsun is besieged by Yuan Shao in Yijing."

The siege has lasted almost half a year. It started last October, and it's been nearly six months now. The soldiers are fighting on empty stomachs, eating only a bowl of thin porridge a day, barely able to stand. Yuan Shao has 100,000 men, while General Gongsun has less than 10,000. They can't hold out any longer.

He took a letter from his pocket and handed it to Liu Bei with both hands. The letter was wrapped in oilcloth, coated with wax, and tied with several hemp ropes. Tian Yu's hands trembled, and it took him several tries to open it. Liu Bei took the letter, opened it, and read it.

Gongsun Zan's handwriting was large and messy, unlike his previous handwriting in Luoyang. Before, Gongsun Zan's handwriting was neat and precise, each stroke like a carving. The characters in this letter were crooked and uneven, some parts thick with ink, others thin, as if written in haste, or perhaps with a trembling hand.

"My dear brother Xuande, I am trapped in Yijing, with no food or reinforcements. Yuan Shao's army of 100,000 is besieging the city, while I have only 10,000 men, and I have been holding out for half a year. I have never forgotten our friendship from when we were classmates and the bond we formed in Luoyang. I hope you will remember our past friendship and send troops to my rescue. Your brother Zan bows deeply."

Liu Bei gripped the letter tightly. The paper was of fine silk, but it had been soaked with sweat and rain, and the words in some places were blurred. He brought the letter closer and tried to decipher each word.

Gongsun Zan. His senior fellow student. His classmate from Mount Goushi. His drinking buddy from Luoyang.

Liu Bei walked back and sat down. He lowered his head, looking at the letter in his hand. His fingers slowly traced the ink marks on the paper. He read it over and over again.

"Mr. Tian, ​​how much longer can Yi Jing hold on?"

Tian Yu said, "At most three months. If we can hold on for another three months, we'll have to resort to cannibalism."

Liu Bei asked, "Three months. Is that enough time?"

Tears streamed down Tian Yu's face. He knelt on the ground, kowtowing repeatedly, his forehead striking the floor with a resounding thud. "General, whether there's enough time or not, we must try. General Gongsun is waiting for you. He said you wouldn't abandon him."

Liu Bei stood up, walked over, and bent down to help him up. "Mr. Tian, ​​please go and rest first. Have something to eat, take a bath, and change your clothes. Let me think. I need to think about it."

Tian Yu stood up, wiped away his tears, and followed his personal guards out. His legs were still weak, and he walked with a limp. His back was thin and frail.

Liu Bei sat alone in the main hall. Sunlight streamed in from the doorway, warming his face. But he didn't feel warm. His heart was cold.

He turned to the last page of the letter. Gongsun Zan added a small note at the end: "If you do not come, brother, I will die."

Liu Bei placed the letter on the table, staring at the small characters for a long time. The sunlight moved from the doorway to the window, then from the window to the corner of the wall. It was getting dark.

Gongsun Zan was waiting for him. He couldn't not go. But how could he go?

The next morning, Liu Bei summoned all his generals to the General's Mansion.

Xun Yu, Jia Xu, Jian Yong, and Qian Zhao were all present. Liu Bei sat in the main seat and placed the letter on the table.

He handed the letter to Xun Yu. Xun Yu took it, read it once, and then handed it to Jia Xu. Jia Xu read it once and placed it on the table.

Qian Zhao said, "Brother, Yi Jing is in Youzhou, more than a thousand miles from Chang'an. To get from Chang'an to Youzhou, we have to pass through Hedong and Bingzhou before reaching Youzhou. None of these places are under your control. Hedong is the territory of the White Wave Army, and Bingzhou is the territory of Yuan Shao. Our troops can't get through."

Liu Bei looked at Qian Zhao. He knew perfectly well that Yi Jing was a thousand miles away and already besieged; how could he possibly rescue him?

He stood up and walked to the window. Peach blossoms were still falling outside, petals landing one by one on the stone steps. The courtyard was empty and quiet, save for the sound of the wind rustling through the peach blossoms.

Jia Xu sat in the corner and spoke. His voice wasn't loud, but every word was clear.

"My lord, Gongsun Zan has been kind to you, and it's only natural that you want to save him. But saving him isn't impossible, it's just that the cost is too high. Your troops have to cross Hedong and Bingzhou to fight Yuan Shao. Even if you win, you'll lose men and supplies, and there's no guarantee you can rescue Gongsun Zan. If you lose, your territory will be in danger. Cao Cao is in Yanzhou, waiting to see what happens. He'd love for you to fight Yuan Shao. Once you fight, he'll seize the opportunity to stab you in the back. At that point, you won't be able to save Gongsun Zan, and you won't even be able to hold onto Chang'an."

Liu Bei went back and sat down. He picked up his teacup, found the tea was cold, and put it down.

"Wenhe, tell me, are we not going to save them?"

Jia Xu said, "We will not save them. It's not that we don't want to, but that we cannot. Your Excellency now commands five provinces, hundreds of thousands of people, and tens of thousands of troops. You have a responsibility to these people. It's not worth causing millions of people to suffer in order to save one person."