A Top-Tier Life Begins with Sarcastic Phrases

Chapter 135 Gu Yun, I'm really asleep~

Da Da Da~

At first, he did look quite decent, but then he started to stumble and trip over his own foot, falling forward and landing with a thud in Gu Yun's arms.

"You're a damn fool, you can't even walk in a straight line! You're only capable of drinking two cups!"

Gu Yun complained and prepared to help Xiao Tian walk forward, but upon closer listening, he realized that Xiao Tian was already snoring, very lightly and weakly.

"She also has a habit of falling asleep as soon as she gets drunk?"

Gu Yun looked at Xiao Tian's agent.

"Um... that's new too."

The agent scratched his head and muttered a complaint under his breath, but it was so loud the wind blew it away that Gu Yun couldn't hear it.

"Hey, never mind, I'll carry her."

The filming location wasn't far from the hotel, at most a hundred meters or so, so Gu Yun could easily carry Tian Xiwei back.

Gu Yun had his left arm around her waist and his right arm supporting her pert buttocks.

"Hmm~"

Xiao Tian let out a soft hiccup, then casually put her hands around Gu Yun's neck and buried her face in his chest.

"Is she really asleep?"

On the way back to the hotel, Chen Momo, who was behind, quietly asked Xiao Tian's assistant, Liu Yanyan.

"A sleeping person wouldn't naturally put their arm around someone's neck, would they?"

Liu Yanyan muttered to herself, having followed Tian Xiwei for a long time and naturally being quite familiar with her: "The boss can't even pretend properly~"

After spending a lot of time with Chen Momo, Liu Yanyan also felt that calling herself the artist's boss was quite natural.

"Oh~"

Chen Momo grinned foolishly, showing her big teeth: "I knew it! She was just faking it!"

After escorting Tian Xiwei back to her hotel room, Gu was about to leave when Tian Xiwei clung to his neck like a sloth and wouldn't get down.

"We've been pretending the whole way, why are you still pretending?"

Gu Yun sighed helplessly. Who could Tian Xiwei possibly fool?

"6

""

Tian Xiwei didn't speak, but she quietly opened her left eye a crack to peek at the situation before quickly closing it again.

"Stop pretending! You've already opened your eyes~"

Gu Yun had no choice but to twist the sloth's big butt.

"Hmm~"

Tian Xi gave a soft groan and mumbled, "Gu Yun, I'm really asleep!"

"Do you really think I'm an idiot?"

Gu Yun patted her bottom, this time quite loudly. Xiao Tian finally stopped pretending to be asleep, her cheeks flushed a deep pink: "Gu Yun~ can't you just let me fool you a little?"

"Only a fool would fall for your trick."

Gu Yun rolled his eyes at her, bent down, and waited until Tian Xiwei's bottom touched the bed before he went to remove Tian Xiwei's hand that was still hanging around his neck.

But Xiaotian somehow found the strength, and with a sudden burst of power from her slender waist, the two of them fell onto the bed.

""

After turning around, Tian Xiwei reached the edge. She cupped Gu Yun's face in her hands and said very seriously, "Gu Yun, I don't want to be just friends."

Warm, soft lips pressed against his, the scent of mint stimulating Gu Yun's nostrils, carrying the smell of alcohol.

The heavy waves pressed down on Gu Yun's chest; water has no constant form, and mountains have no constant shape.

"Gu Yun~ Why are your lips so swollen?"

Tian Xiwei was panting heavily, her dark eyes filled with tenderness.

She smiled slyly, quite pleased with herself.

"How did it get swollen?"

Gu Yun looked at Tian Xiwei: "You're quite smug, aren't you?"

"Hmm~"

Tian Xi gave a soft hum, her warm breath hitting Gu Yun's face: "I don't know, seeing your lips just makes me want to bite them~"

"Fine, you bit me, so I have to get my revenge!"

How could Gu Yun stand being mocked like this by an idiot?

He lifted Tian Xiwei's buttocks and pushed her forward forcefully.

Xiao Tian's head suddenly towered over Gu Yun's. "Gu Yun, what are you doing?"

Gu Yun didn't leave until after 7 a.m. the next morning, and went back to his room to catch up on sleep.

He and Tian Xiwei have no chance today, so he doesn't need to worry about Tian's swollen lips being noticed.

"Thank goodness, thank goodness, you can't tell anything from her face~"

Looking at herself in the mirror, Tian Xi breathed a slight sigh of relief. Although Gu Yun had taken revenge, he hadn't bitten her lip; otherwise, she really wouldn't have been able to face anyone.

Not to mention filming afterwards!

Fortunately, before Gu Yun left, he changed the sheets and duvet cover, cleaned the room again, and sprayed air freshener.

"He's actually quite reliable~"

-

Xiao Tian hugged the pillow Gu Yun had given her, smiled sweetly, and prepared to go to sleep.

Suddenly, a strange question popped into her mind: Right, why is he so proficient in this process?

October has come to a hasty end, and the films released during the National Day holiday have received mixed reviews.

But there is one exception!

That's "Bureau 749," the only movie that was universally criticized online!

From special effects and acting to plot, every aspect has been criticized, and the initial Douban rating was 5.0.

This score is clearly inflated; it was bought with money from online trolls.

But the director thought this was wrong. During the roadshow, he said that the audience was deliberately smearing the film and that the cinemas were not giving it screenings. He said that all parties had thought of this, but no one had thought of their own problem.

On stage, he hysterically shouted, "Please give the film a fair judgment; justice resides in the hearts of the people."

Another actor was crying his eyes out, saying that this movie was made with great care, a sci-fi masterpiece that took eight years to make, and that someone was targeting them!

Someone is targeting domestically produced science fiction!

Well—basically, I just say whatever comes to mind, playing the victim card and appealing to national sentiment.

After all that, some netizens who had never eaten shit were actually tricked into going to the movie theater to eat shit.

Some people who had seen it before were starting to doubt whether they had watched a fake film and been tricked into watching it again!

The result was still as terrible as ever!

In the end, although the movie's box office increased a bit, its reputation, from the movie itself to the director and the actors, was completely ruined!

[This is something you're telling me about being targeted?]

No, who's targeting you? Please respond!

Why call it Bureau 749? Just call it Wings Adventure, okay?

I didn't believe it before when people said Jiang Wen directed "The Missing Gun," but now I truly believe it!

[How the hell can this be released during the National Day holiday?]

The movie originally had a Douban rating of 5.0, but later it dropped to 3.2.

This 3.2 is not the limit for netizens, but the limit for Douban ratings. The lowest Douban score is 2.0, otherwise you are not allowed to rate it.

The popularity of Bureau 749 has even surpassed that of the heavily promoted "Joy of Life 2".

It's unprecedented for a movie to be universally considered a bad film.

As for whether anyone else will follow, Gu is not entirely sure.

After all, you can never imagine what kind of Homeric history crap some self-proclaimed highly educated guys with professional directing licenses would produce.

"Old Gu, I really have to thank you this time!"

Guo Qilin, Gu Yun, and Zhang Ruoyun were having dinner together at a hot pot restaurant in Hengdian.

The second season of "Joy of Life" will be broadcast in a few days, and the director called them back to film some promotional and congratulatory videos together.

"Why are you saying thank you? Tsk, are you copying me?"

Gu Yun joked.

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