Ming Dynasty: A centenarian madman criticizes the Grand Secretary and brings his coffin to court!

Images flow across the sky.

The Hongzhi Emperor, who "ruled by doing nothing" and was too lazy to even approve memorials, finally passed away amidst the praises of the court officials (who were actually relieved).

After eighteen years of inertial operation, this sophisticated machine of the Ming Dynasty was finally put into operation.

Finally, one has arrived...

Completely unconventional, enough to give any civil servant a heart attack—

Mischievous devil!

【Ding--】

[Time: First year of Zhengde (1506 AD)]

Location: Beijing, the Forbidden City... next to the "Leopard House"!

[Profile: Zhu Houzhao, the tenth emperor of the Ming Dynasty!]

[Attributes: Extremely hyperactive! Military fanatic! Number one toxic fanatic of Grand Tutor Gu!]

on the screen.

The once solemn and majestic royal forbidden area was now filled with the terrifying roars of wild beasts!

"roar--!!!"

The camera zooms in.

Inside a newly built, magnificent building, there was neither the legendary wine pool and meat forest, nor the harem of beauties.

But...

zoo!

And it's a predator zone!

Lion! Tiger! Black Bear!

There were even a few covered in spots, with bulging muscles, transported all the way from the New World (America)—

Jaguar!

And among these ferocious beasts.

A young emperor dressed in tight-fitting clothes, with bare arms and clearly defined muscles all over his body.

He was riding on the back of a huge jaguar, waving a...

Gilded bull whip (a replica of the Gu Taishi style)!

"drive!"

"Run!"

"Drive it at the speed of a Maybach!"

As Zhu Houzhao rode the leopard at breakneck speed, he roared and shouted excitedly.

The eunuchs around him trembled with fear, terrified that the emperor might accidentally become a snack.

But Zhu Houzhao didn't care!

His eyes were filled with nothing but fanaticism!

"The Grand Tutor is right!"

Zhu Houzhao jumped off the leopard's back and picked up a tattered book that had been read many times.

The cover features four large characters written in wild cursive script—

The Art of War for Mad Dogs!

(Author: Gu Canghai)

"The Grand Tutor said..."

Zhu Houzhao pointed to the preface in the book and recited it aloud:

"Life is about taking risks!"

"A man should do what a man should do!"

"Ride the fiercest horse (or leopard), drink the strongest wine, and kill the most ruthless enemies!"

"This Forbidden City is so stuffy!"

"I cannot stay!"

"I want to live in the Leopard Chamber! I want to train troops! I want to be a great general!"

"I want to be like the Grand Tutor..."

Zhu Houzhao's eyes sparkled with excitement:

"Let's go racing with coffins in our hands! Let's beat those barbarians to a pulp!"

……

Beyond the sky.

The Hongwu Plane.

Zhu Yuanzhang looked at the image of his great-grandson riding a leopard and running around.

The tea in his mouth sprayed directly onto Zhu Biao's face!

"puff--!!!"

"Cough cough cough!"

"this……"

"Is this the emperor?"

"Is this guy a beast tamer?!"

Zhu Yuanzhang pointed at Zhu Houzhao, his hand trembling:

"How could that lazybones Hongzhi have given birth to such a... such a lively monkey?"

"Riding a leopard?"

"Trying to emulate Crazy Gu?"

"It's all over! He's going to ruin the Ming Dynasty!"

however.

Emperor Yongle (Zhu Di) watched this scene unfold.

But...

Eyes lit up!

It's frighteningly bright!

"good!"

"Good lad!"

Zhu Di slapped his thigh and jumped up from his chair in excitement:

"You've got guts!"

"This is the true bloodline of our Zhu family!"

"Just like me! So much like me!"

"More like..."

Zhu Di, seeing Zhu Houzhao's lawless and disregard for etiquette, couldn't help but burst into laughter:

"He's more like that old madman!"

"Ha ha ha ha!"

"Gu the Madman's spirit..."

"The successor has been found!"

……

on the screen.

Zhu Houzhao's "madness" was not just about playing with animals.

He really wants to fight!

He gave himself an official title—General Zhu Shou, Commander-in-Chief of the Mighty Army!

then.

He led the "Shenji Battalion Special Forces" that he personally trained (all members were equipped with the latest repeating firearms).

They secretly slipped out of Juyong Pass!

Where to go?

Let's go to the grasslands!

Go hunting!

【Ding--】

[Time: The twelfth year of the Zhengde reign.]

Location: Eungju.

[Event: A battle in which the emperor himself intervened, leaving the young Mongol prince beating him senseless—]

[Dancing on the grassland!]

on the screen.

Yellow sand filled the sky.

The Mongol prince Dayan Khan, leading 50,000 cavalry, stormed into the border of the Ming Dynasty.

He thought that the emperor of the Ming Dynasty this time was a spoiled brat who only knew how to play with leopards.

result.

When two armies are facing off.

He was stunned.

All that could be seen was the Ming army's formation.

There was no traditional infantry square formation.

All that's left are rows of dark, gaping cannon muzzles!

And at the very front of the artillery position.

A young man dressed in golden armor, riding a tall horse, and holding the iconic megaphone.

She was waving at him excitedly.

"Feed him/her?"

"Is that the Little Prince?"

"I... no, I am Zhu Shou!"

"I heard you want to fight?"

"Come on, come on!"

Zhu Houzhao, holding a megaphone, pointed to the artillery positions behind him and shouted out Grand Tutor Gu's famous quote:

"The Grand Tutor said..."

"truth……"

"Within firing range!"

"dignity……"

"Only in terms of artillery!"

"Give it to me—"

"Bomb the hell out of him!!!"

"BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM—!!!"

With a command from Zhu Houzhao.

Hundreds of improved red-coated cannons, plus thousands of "Rain of Pear Blossoms" guns.

Fire at the same time!

Bullets rained down!

Flames shot into the sky!

This is hardly a war.

This is a massive—firepower show!

Before the Mongol cavalry could even get close, they were blown to bits, their men and horses falling to the ground, crying out in pain!

"Aaaaaah!"

"What kind of playing style is this?!"

"People in the Ming Dynasty didn't value martial virtue!"

The little prince was stunned and turned to run away.

"Don't run away!"

Zhu Houzhao panicked when he saw the enemy trying to escape.

He drew his sword and spurred his horse.

"My lords!"

"Charge with me!"

"Beat a dog when it's down!"

"Let's go to the grasslands—"

"Go clubbing!!!"

"Kill them!!!"

The emperor led the charge!

The morale of the Ming army was soaring!

This battle.

They defeated the Mongolian prince so badly that he dared not venture south to graze his horses for decades!

Even just hearing the name "Mighty General" makes their legs go weak with fear!

……

after the war.

Beijing, Leopard House.

Zhu Houzhao returned victorious and was in high spirits.

but.

The civil officials, however, refused to accept this.

They knelt at the entrance of the leopard house, wailing and pleading with their lives!

"Your Majesty!"

"You are of noble birth, how could you risk your life like this?"

"This goes against ancestral customs!"

"Your Majesty, please settle down, return to the palace to study, and stop causing trouble!"

"read?"

Zhu Houzhao sat on the steps of the Leopard House, holding a small tiger in his arms, with a look of disdain on his face.

"What books should you read?"

"Could the Four Books and Five Classics have repelled the Mongols?"

"Will this ensure that the people have enough to eat?"

"cannot!"

Zhu Houzhao stood up and took out a portrait from his pocket.

That's a portrait of Gu Canghai!

In the painting, Gu Canghai is carrying a coffin and holding an axe, with an arrogant expression on his face.

"Look at this!"

Zhu Houzhao pointed at the portrait and roared at the group of civil officials:

"Who is this?"

"This is Grand Tutor Gu!"

"It is the pillar that stabilizes the Ming Dynasty!"

"The Grand Tutor was already a hundred years old back then, and he still dared to sail out to sea in his coffin to destroy a country!"

"They even dare to seize territory in the New World!"

"I'm only in my early twenties!"

"He's in his prime!"

"Why can't I?!"

"Why should I be relegated to a groveling position in the deep palace?!"

Zhu Houzhao became increasingly agitated as he spoke, pointing westward:

"I'm not only going to the grasslands!"

"I still want to go to the other side of the sea!"

"I heard about that... Europe?"

"That's the place the Grand Tutor failed to conquer!"

"I am going to personally lead the army into battle!"

"I'm going to plant the Ming Dynasty's dragon flag on the roof of their... Vatican!"

"Who dares to stop me?!"

"Who dares?!"

The civil officials stared at the emperor, who was even more insane than Gu Fengzi, speechless with astonishment.

This child...

Hopeless!

They've been completely led astray by Grand Tutor Gu!

How could this resemble a Grand Tutor?

This is practically Gu Taishi's style—

A reincarnated lama!

……

Beyond the sky.

Zhu Di looked at his great-grandson in the picture, who was full of ambition and wanted to plant a flag in the Vatican.

I laughed so hard that tears came out.

"Ha ha ha ha!"

"good!"

"That's ambitious!"

"As expected of my son!"

"Go! We have to go!"

"Fourth Prince (Zhu Gaochi), you'd better remember this!"

"From now on, all descendants of the Zhu family must be raised this way!"

"Don't raise them like pigs in the palace!"

"We should be like Crazy Gu..."

"Raising wolves!"

"Raising a tiger!"

"To cultivate this world..."

"The most ferocious beast!!!"