I was just fishing, how did I become a Great Old One?

Koprulu Sector, Char Planet, Hercules crash site.

On the battlefield, thick with the smoke of gunpowder, the air seemed to freeze.

The giant golden pillar (the Golden Cudgel) that fell from the sky is still stuck in the pile of hydralisks, surrounded by dozens of pools of red and green flesh.

Tykes (the captain) remained kneeling, holding an empty syringe. His pupils were abnormally dilated from the overdose of stimulants, and the muscles around his eyes were twitching violently.

Behind him, the twelve surviving Marines, though their guns were lowered, still stared intently at the "unknown creatures" before them, a result of their long struggles on the brink of death.

A monkey wearing a tiger-skin skirt and holding a stick...?

A child riding on wheels with fire and wrapped in a red cloth...?

A spotted dog wearing sunglasses and carrying a sleeping little girl on its back?

There was also a man wearing a white coat (actually a chef's uniform), carrying a razor, with a kind smile on his face...?

"Sir..."

The recruit named Reynolds broke the silence with a trembling voice.

"Is...is this a new variant of the Zerg?"

"Or... have the Protoss cloaked units been revealed?"

"That monkey looks... kind of like a Protoss fanatic, but with a lot of hair."

……

At the touch of a hair.

"Gods my foot!"

Sun Wukong, with his sharp ears, overheard this muttering.

He slung the golden cudgel over his shoulder, bared his teeth, and roared at the group of humans clad in heavy power armor:

"I, Old Sun, am the Great Sage Equal to Heaven! Not some monkey! Nor am I a god!"

"If you dare point a gun at me again, believe me, I'll smash your metal shells into a pulp!"

"Snap!"

Wukong's roar carried divine power.

The Marines, who were already suffering from nervous breakdowns, were so frightened that their hands trembled, and the safety on several C-14 Gauss rifles instantly disengaged, causing the muzzles to rise again.

"Don't move! No one is allowed to move!"

Tex roared, though he didn't know if he could win, it was instinct.

"Who exactly are you people?"

"What are you doing here?"

"If they're Zerg puppets... I'll detonate the power core and take you all down with me!"

……

Culinary diplomacy.

The atmosphere was tense, and a conflict could erupt at any moment.

Jiang Li sighed helplessly.

He patted Wukong on the shoulder, signaling him to calm down.

Then, he tucked the green-blooded Occam's razor back into his belt, raised his hands (holding the takeout bag), and slowly took a step forward.

"Don't be nervous, everyone."

Jiang Li's voice was gentle, with a strange soothing power (the passive ability of the Gluttony God: making hungry people feel loved).

"We are neither Zerg nor Protoss."

"We are... cooks who were just passing by."

"I just received your order."

Jiang Li shook the green meat soup packet made from the liquid sacs of exploding insects in his hand.

"Weren't you all shouting for aid and food?"

"I've brought it to you."

……

"food?"

Tex stared at the green, still steaming soft sac.

Her nose twitched.

"Gurgle..."

An indescribable fragrance pierced through his mask, which had an air filtration system, and went straight into his nasal cavity.

That's... acid.

Extremely appetizing sourness.

Mixed with...the aroma of meat.

Rich and mellow meaty aroma.

On this planet Char, which reeks of sulfur and the stench of corpses, this smell is like the air of paradise.

"What...what is this?"

Tex swallowed hard, his Adam's apple bobbing up and down.

"This looks...like the belly of a blastocyst?"

"That's right."

Jiang Li introduced with a smile.

"The packaging is made of insect shells, which are environmentally friendly and biodegradable."

"Inside is... [Deep Blue Special Sour Soup with Cockroach Meat]."

"cockroach?!"

The soldiers behind him gagged.

"Ugh... Sir, he's playing us!"

"This is definitely poison! Or parasite eggs!"

"The flesh of the alien insect is entirely composed of strong acid; eating it will rot your intestines!"

……

The first person to eat a crab (cockroach).

Jiang Li did not defend himself in the face of the questions.

He simply opened the seal of a soup packet.

"call--"

A thicker plume of white smoke rose up.

The sour, spicy, and savory flavor instantly intensified tenfold.

"Whether it's poisonous or not, we'll know by tasting it, won't we?"

Jiang Li casually tossed the soup dumpling to Reynolds, the recruit who looked like he was about to faint from hunger.

"then."

"If you don't want to starve to death, take a sip."

Reynolds frantically caught the soft, hot capsule.

It was hot to the touch, yet warm.

That warmth, through the cold power armor gloves, reached his palms.

"I...I can't take it anymore..."

Reynolds had been starving for three days, and with the added side effects of the stimulants, his rational defenses completely collapsed.

"Even poison... is better than starving to death!"

He suddenly ripped off his mask (an extremely dangerous act, but he didn't care because he wanted to eat).

Pointing at the opening of the soup dumpling.

"Glug!"

A large mouthful of piping hot meat soup slid down his throat.

……

The entire venue fell silent.

Everyone was staring at Reynolds.

Wait for him to clutch his stomach and scream in agony, or for green foam to come out of his mouth.

however.

one second.

two seconds.

three seconds.

Reynolds froze.

His eyes widened, and his originally ashen face visibly regained its color...

Followed by.

Two lines of clear tears flowed down his cheeks.

"Waaaaah..."

He cried.

"What's wrong? Are you poisoned?" a comrade asked anxiously.

"No……"

Reynolds looked up, a dreamy expression on his face.

"Yes...it tastes good."

"It tastes so good..."

"This sour taste...washes away all the bitterness in my throat!"

"This meat...it's so tender! So smooth and juicy! Every bite is bursting with flavor!"

"This isn't a cockroach...it's practically...stewed beef!"

After saying that, Reynolds stopped talking, tilted his head back, and began to frantically swallow the soup dumpling.

"Glug glug glug—"

……

The defenses collapsed.

With the first person taking the lead, the rest is easy.

The sound of swallowing was more effective than any letter of surrender for a group of strong men who had been starving for three days.

"Oh shit!"

Tex cursed.

"Even if I die, I'll die with a full stomach!"

He threw down his gun.

He strode up to Jiang Li.

"Give me one!"

"Me too!"

"Sir! Leave some for me!"

The previously well-prepared defenses collapsed instantly.

A group of burly men wearing heavy powered armor weighing hundreds of kilograms surrounded Jiang Li, begging for food like a group of kindergarten children.

"Don't worry, we have them all."

Jiang Li opened his pack.

They distributed the green meat soup packets one by one, like handing out welfare benefits.

They also included a complimentary piece of crispy dried meat with worms.

"This jerky is a bit hard, remember to hold it in your mouth and chew it slowly, so you don't break your teeth."

……

A picnic on the battlefield.

A few minutes later.

The battlefield, which had just been filled with the sounds of battle, has now been transformed into a large picnic area.

Dozens of Marines sat on the ground, lifted their masks, and drank ravenously from green soup dumplings.

"Slurp—"

"ha--"

"Crunch—" (sound of biting into jerky)

Praises rose and fell.

"God! I feel like I'm alive again!"

"Is this really cockroach meat? Why does the Federation's rations only include synthetic starch blocks?"

"This spiciness! It's so addictive! I can feel my fingers stopping trembling!"

……

Tex finished both bags of meat broth in one go.

He wiped the soup from the corner of his mouth.

The severe headache and hand tremors caused by stimulant withdrawal were miraculously relieved.

Jiang Li added springtail bone marrow (rich in nerve repair factors) to the soup.

"call……"

Tex breathed a sigh of relief.

The way he looked at Jiang Li finally changed.

It's no longer about vigilance and hostility.

Rather, it's the kind of look one gives when looking at God (or one's benefactors).

"brother."

Tex stood up, his massive power armor emitting a heavy mechanical sound.

He extended a giant mechanical hand.

"Although I don't know which deities you are."

"But this meal... saved our lives."

My name is Tex.

"Captain of the 7th Reno Ranger Squadron".

Thanks.

……

Formal contact.

Jiang Li reached out and grasped the cold mechanical hand.

"Jiang Li".

"Head Chef of Deep Blue Cafeteria".

"You're welcome."

Jiang Li revealed a businessman's smile.

"We run a restaurant, not a charity."

"This meal... will cost money."

"money?"

Tex paused for a moment, then gave a wry smile.

He patted the empty ammunition pouch at his waist.

"Brother, you saw it too."

"We're so poor we don't even have bullets left."

"Federal credits are less valuable than toilet paper in this godforsaken place."

"We...have no money."

……

Bartering.

"I don't want credits."

Jiang Li waved his hand.

His gaze swept over the crashed Hercules transport ship.

Although the hull was severely damaged, many key mechanical structures remained intact.

Moreover, although the power armor worn by these soldiers and the Gauss rifles they carried were old, they were highly technologically advanced.

That is... the culmination of heavy industrial civilization.

This is also what the Tree Spirit is currently most lacking.

"What I want..."

Jiang Li pointed to an SCV (space engineering vehicle) next to him that was still spitting sparks even though it had lost a leg.

"It's technology."

"And... labor force."

"I see you have quite a few spare parts on this ship, don't you?"

"And this SCV... if it can be repaired, could I borrow it for a few days?"

……

"SCV?"

Tex glanced back at the dilapidated construction vehicle.

"There are still two of those machines that are still working."

"but……"

Tex looked at Jiang Li with a puzzled expression.

"You guys are so powerful, you can even shoot down a flying dragon, why would you care about these few broken machines?"

"Everyone has their own area of ​​expertise."

Jiang Li didn't explain much.

"Just tell me if you want to change it or not."

"I can provide you with... a long-term, stable supply of food."

"It's not just cockroach meat."

"And... grilled meat skewers, fried cartilage, even... bottled water."

"I just need you to fix something for me."

……

Transaction.

Hearing the words "long-term food supply".

Tex's eyes turned green.

The soldiers around him were also green with envy.

On this hellish planet Char, this is the highest level of temptation.

"Change!"

Tex slapped his thigh.

"As long as meals are provided!"

"Don't even mention fixing things!"

"Even if you ask us to pull out the Lord's teeth, we'll do it!"

"make a deal."

Jiang Li nodded in satisfaction.

This first encounter between species was a complete success, thanks to the matchmaking of sour soup cockroach meat.

……

New problems.

Just as the two sides were about to shake hands and make peace and begin moving supplies.

"ah!!!!"

A piercing scream suddenly came from the crowd.

Everyone turned around.

The recruit Reynolds, who had been the first to drink the soup, was now clutching his head and rolling on the ground in agony.

His whole body was convulsing violently.

It felt like bugs were crawling under my skin.

White foam came out of his mouth.

"Reynolds!"

Tex's expression changed drastically, and he rushed over to hold him down.

"Damn it! It's withdrawal symptoms!"

"Having eaten a large meal earlier, my body's functions were recovering, which actually accelerated the onset of toxins!"

"Doping...this kid's dosage is way too high!"

"Do you have any sedatives?!"

"We've already used them all up!" The military doctor shrugged helplessly.

……

Seeing Reynolds struggling in pain, Tex's face showed despair.

On the battlefield, stimulants are both life-saving miracles and deadly demons.

Without subsequent medication, this neurotoxin can cause excruciating pain that leads to death.

"Get out of the way."

Just then.

A calm voice rang out.

Jiang Li walked over.

He crouched down and opened Reynolds' eyelids to take a look.

"Nervous system overload".

"A typical case of...chemical poisoning."

"Can...can you save me?" Tex grabbed Jiang Li's arm as if he were grasping at a straw.

"Western medicine may not be effective."

Jiang Li stood up.

He pulled the Klein pot out of his pack.

Then he took out a handful of dried, grayish-black fungus that he had collected in an underground mine.

"But... dietary therapy is an option."

"On this planet Char, there is a fungus that grows alongside the Zerg nests, called... [Ash Song]."

"It can calm the nerves and detoxify."

"And then add..."

Jiang Li looked at the pile of dead hydras next to him.

"The gall bladder of a hydralisk."

"Fight poison with poison."

"Ergou! Start a fire!"

"Nezha! Go and get the gall bladder!"

"I need to brew them a pot of medicine."