Didn't you go to Teyvat to earn money to support me?

"I have nothing... to say."

"Is that your answer?"

Shen Liang gently raised his head, looked into her eyes, and said, "I will take responsibility."

"Crack!"

He stabbed the boy in the wound where he had been bitten earlier!

"Shameless!" Rosalyn stared intently at him, the knife tip embedded three centimeters into his shoulder, but seeing Shen Liang's pained expression, she subconsciously loosened her grip. Realizing she had relaxed, she felt both hatred and sorrow, and could only shed tears again.

"You can dodge it."

“I don’t need to dodge,” Shen Liang said in a low voice. “My injuries heal very quickly. Even if you stab me a few more times, I will recover in a few minutes. You can’t hurt me.”

[Honey, wake up! Why can't you say, "If this makes me feel better, I'm willing to be punished"? Why do you have to provoke me like this?] Mistelin was so angry she almost laughed.

Rosalyn's heartache was immediately replaced by mockery. She gripped the knife and laughed, "What do you mean? Humiliating me... Wasn't the humiliation before enough? How else do you want to humiliate me? Do you want me to kneel in front of you right now so you can continue to play with me, my dear little wolfhound?"

"I didn't humiliate you, not now." Shen Liang had never sounded so aggrieved before. "...not before either."

Rosalyn paused, then pulled out her knife and looked at the boy clutching his wound. The usually willful little princess she remembered was so vulnerable for the first time, barely daring to raise her voice or even utter a word in reply, like a frightened white cat curling up in fear.

—Not before.

Rosalyn wiped away her tears.

“You’re always like this, Liang’er. You make mistakes, but you always make people unable to help but forgive you… You’re sensible and lovely, and even now I can’t help but feel sorry for you. But,” Rosalin looked in the mirror, her eyes red from crying, “you want me, but you shouldn’t do it this way.”

"Feel sorry."

Rosalyn turned to face the mirror, feeling the burning sensation of the brand on her back. The warmth and the desire to submit made her understand what had happened to her. She looked in the mirror at the bright red stigmata on her back.

She laughed.

“You’re such a bastard! I know I should be angry, but I just can’t bring myself to be angry with you. I know why, because just like you want me, I’ve fantasized about this moment to some extent. I knew from the beginning that I can’t leave you, and I can’t resist when you want me.” Rosalyn suddenly stood up!

"But this is sinful!"

Rosalyn gripped the knife in a reverse grip and plunged it into her own back! Then she slashed upwards! Her skin was torn open!

She screamed in pain, but her hands didn't stop; she made several more cuts! Blood splattered, the wounds so deep they revealed bone!

Shen Liang was completely bewildered, not understanding what she was doing, but Rosalyn then pulled out the knife and stared into Shen Liang's eyes!

"You think that just because you were born noble, beautiful, and powerful, you can automatically gain everyone's forgiveness and admiration? You're wrong!" Unlike Shen Liang, Rosalin hadn't experienced fifty thousand years of torment and countless life-or-death struggles. She was acutely aware of pain, and cold sweat beaded on her brow. "I was born a mortal. I may not be as beautiful as you, Liang'er, but I'm not your toy to play with as you please! Do you think I should be inseparable from you, wanting to leave your mark on me? Is my life solely tied to your whims? You're wrong! I, like you, have countless lives to live. I don't belong to you. We are equals in this world!"

She pulled up her clothes, covered her ears, and refused to listen to or dare to listen to any of Shen Liang's attempts to stop her, then rushed out the door.

Shen Liang looked at the girl's back and the bloodstains along the way.

Aren't you going to try to keep me here?

【no need.】

【Honey, have you figured it out?】

"Now that my memories are back, I have so many things to think about. I can't let things hold me back," Shen Liang said softly. "I'm sorry to Sister Rosalin, but I've wronged so many people. I can't keep comforting them all. I have to move forward to be worthy of them."

[Having tasted loss once again, is it painful?]

Shen Liang remained silent.

The reason you're suffering, my dear, is that neither good nor bad is pure enough. If the little wolf within you were purely evil, it wouldn't be bothered by worldly condemnation and would simply follow its own path to the bitter end. But it's not purely evil either.

【Yeah? 】

But darling, at least from now on, you're becoming more and more genuine.

【Yeah……】

------------

Rosalyn left the dormitory. She had been assigned to the Department of Combat anyway, so changing her student status only required her to apply.

Rosalyn ran all the way to the playground before stopping and leaning against a pear tree, panting heavily.

Gan Yu, who had been following her all the way, stopped beside her and handed her a glass of water, which was still warm.

"Heh... thank you." Rosalin looked at the helpless-looking Qilin girl, stared for a long time, and finally whispered, "You and Liang'er... have been in this kind of relationship for a long time?"

"You still call him Liang'er?" Gan Yu said softly.

"What...what can I do?"

"If I had to say, we do have a very deep relationship with Liang'er, but... not as deep as with you, Miss Rosalyn."

"Is that so?" Rosalyn's expression was somewhat complicated. Gan Yu looked at her for a long time, and finally couldn't help but tentatively whisper, "Miss Rosalyn doesn't seem to be filled with so much hatred?"

“I can’t do anything to Liang’er. No matter what happens, I… don’t have the right to challenge someone with real power like Liang’er.” Rosalin leaned against the tree, looking up at the treetops. “Of course I hate him, but I have to face reality. He is the child of the Seven Rulers of the Mortal World.”

“No, what I mean is…” Gan Yu carefully chose her words, “I listened to your entire conversation, and you didn’t seem to remember mentioning… your special male friend?”

Chapter 118 I really love you so much, baby

"Special male friends? No, my circle of friends in Jigong... because of Liang'er, is very high-level, mostly immortals, gods, yakshas and the like, I don't have any men..." Rosalin paused for a moment, then forced a smile and looked at Gan Yu, "Are you talking about Rustan?"

“After such a tragic event, I… also have to apologize to you,” Gan Yu said softly. “But Miss Rosalyn, as your soon-to-be fiancé, don’t you mind his…”

"You mean my anger is only directed at Liang'er's tyranny, not because I've completely lost Rustan... right?" Rosalin noticed Gan Yu's hesitation. She stroked her stomach, feeling the lingering ache and pain, and finally spoke softly, "Of course I hate Liang'er, I hate his loss of reason, I hate his viciousness, I hate that he made me... trample on my dignity in front of my friends. In short, I hate him for many things, but, strangely enough, losing Rustan doesn't hurt me as much, it's just that..."

"Something?"

"Feeling lost and disappointed."

Rosalind sighed. "I don't know how to describe this feeling. I think I've always had some feelings for Rustan, even though we've never confessed to each other, it's all just friendship. He's a noble knight, very elegant, and in a way, I'm even out of his league. In Liyue terms, he's a rare catch. But... I thought I would be heartbroken, but actually, the moment he was completely disappointed in me, I felt a lot relieved."

Gan Yu didn't dare to speak much, but she knew what that moment was like. It was probably the most tragic moment in Rosalyn's life, wearing the wedding dress he had given her, being branded with another person's mark before his very eyes.

“I know that he will misunderstand me and abandon me because of my pathetic state, but I think that’s just right… I’ve been struggling with this for a while, but it all came together when he left. That’s why I never called him back. I know I don’t deserve it anymore,” Rosalyn said softly. “So this is the only thing I can’t hate Liang’er for. Maybe I already had my doubts, and you know, there can’t be any hesitation in love… If I had any doubts, I wouldn’t have been worthy of being with the pure and innocent Rustan. Liang’er just… didn’t give me time to choose.”

"You hesitated?" Gan Yu asked, puzzled. She sensed that what they had always thought about Rosalyn and Rustan's long-distance relationship wasn't entirely pure.

“Of course, I’m not that straightforward. Rustin is wonderful, perfect, the dream lover of countless noble ladies. I’m the one who doesn’t deserve him. But I’m conflicted. I’m always unwilling to accept it.” Rosalind shook her head. “I don’t want to be a mistress who follows him around, kept in his manor. I come from a commoner background, studied in Sumeru and Liyue, and went through so much. I didn’t work so hard just to hide my claws and become a noblewoman… Rustin is very good to me. Such a life is already a luxury for a dancer, but that’s not what I want. I don’t know what I want, but generally speaking, I hope for a fair love and a dignified marriage. I’m not anyone’s white moonlight, nor anyone’s canary, nor anyone’s toy. I am just myself.”

Gan Yu silently watched the blonde girl. She could understand her a little. This girl, who came from a commoner background in Mondstadt, seemed enthusiastic, but she had a sensitive and fragile sense of self-esteem.

Mondstadt is known for its freedom, but in Gan Yu's opinion, it is far less free than Liyue, and even less free than the rigidly hierarchical Inazuma. The dividing line between Mondstadt nobles and commoners is too deep; if Rustan hadn't grown up with Erendel, the "Lion of Light," he wouldn't even have had the possibility of becoming a noble.

The commoners of Mondstadt are long accustomed to their lives; blacksmiths, merchants, and bards are their destiny, and bustling flea markets and pungent taverns are their daily routine. While commoners may walk with their heads held high before nobles, they remain ultimately humble and subservient, vying to serve them at all costs.

Boys dream of becoming knights' squires, while girls dream of being valued and kept as canaries.

But Rosalyn is different.

She was a renowned dancer in Mondstadt, and although ultimately just a commoner, her fame allowed her to forge a slightly different path. She had the right to study abroad, the right to grow and progress, and the opportunity to see different worlds and contemplate her own life. She possessed the inferiority complex of a commoner and the arrogance of a genius; she yearned for the idyllic life of aristocracy, yet longed to live as an equal.

Too clear-headed.

"It's always too tiring for a person who's too clear-headed to live," Gan Yu thought.

If Rosalyn hadn't learned so many lessons, if she were still just an ordinary dancer, if she weren't so clear-headed, she would have happily married Rustin instead of pondering what freedom and equality meant. Marrying the vice-captain of the Knights as a dancer ultimately meant becoming nothing more than a well-off mistress; her wealth and social status stemmed from Rustin's patronage, not from her own efforts.

That's good, but that's not equality. No matter how comfortable that kind of life is, it lacks dignity.

If you want dignity, you can't rely on anyone's pity.

"If Miss Rosalyn is willing... Liang Jun also regrets it. As long as you don't object, he definitely wants to take responsibility for you." Gan Yu could only say this in the end. "This isn't another case of keeping a mistress. You can live however you want. After all, Liang Jun has to compensate you. If that's not possible, we can try our best to compensate you too. We're all..."

"We're all family, all Liang'er's dear sisters?" Rosalin smiled, leaving Gan Yu speechless.

Although she felt a little wronged—it was Liang Jun who was causing trouble for you, not me—she couldn't say anything at this point, since, in a way, she and Shen Liang were on the same side.

“We can still be friends even if we can’t do that, but not Liang’er. I won’t accept any compensation, and Liang’er can’t compensate me for anything.” Rosalyn stroked her belly. “I will hate him, hate him for a very, very long time, and let him taste this feeling too. He can’t have everything he wants; he can lose things too, and he can be hated by his own woman. I don’t know if he likes me, but he may never have experienced the feeling of being hated. I want him to know that he’s just a bastard too! Sigh… I really can’t get revenge on him. Even if he stands there and doesn’t move, I can’t hurt him, and I can’t bear to get revenge on him… but that doesn’t mean I don’t have the ability to make him suffer.”

"So you're leaving?" Gan Yu couldn't bear it. "Leaving like this? Now... you probably can't go back to Mondstadt, where can you go? I know you can't accept living with Liang'er anymore, but at least stay. I can arrange a job for you in the General Affairs Department, away from Liang'er. At least, at least we're still good friends, there's no need to distance ourselves from us too."

“No, I’m capable of surviving. Even before I had my current strength, I could still make a living in a tavern as an eight-year-old dancer, let alone now.” Rosalyn laughed. “What I need is to be alone for a while. Don’t worry, I won’t do anything drastic. Oh, don’t look like that. I’m not that desperate. It’s just that leaving familiar places and familiar people is what makes me truly alone.”

"How long?"

“Maybe a few months, maybe a few years, maybe decades?” Rosalyn’s smile faded. “Maybe I’ll stop hating him someday. Time heals all wounds. Of course, maybe I’ll eventually succeed in my studies and become even more terrifying than Liang’er. Then I’ll settle this score with Liang’er… Don’t worry, don’t worry, for your sake, I won’t kill him.”

Gan Yu smiled silently. As Rosalin's friend and classmate, and Shen Liang's sister and lover, she could only remain silent and not offer any comment.

Changing the subject, they walked and talked for a long time. Rosalyn gradually sorted out her thoughts, and her plan to leave became more and more firm. Anyway, she didn't need to stick to the Department of Killing and Conquest. Jigong was a school that you could come and go as you pleased. She could just apply for a leave of absence and leave. There were precedents for taking a leave of absence for a thousand years.

Rosalind stopped only when she reached the summit.

She stroked her lower abdomen and sighed softly.

"Speaking of which, Miss Rosalyn, is your stomach hurting? You seemed quite concerned about this the whole way here," Gan Yu teased. "You only remembered you needed to use the restroom when you ran out?"

Rosalyn's face flushed red instantly.

She rolled her eyes at Gan Yu helplessly, "No, it's..."

"Huh?" Gan Yu was taken aback, then understood, and the little Qilin blushed instantly.

Seeing her expression, Rosalin knew she had thought of that too, and slightly annoyed, she took a deep breath: "That's how it is. I have to say, Liang'er is really a real little wolfhound, you two are in for a world of trouble! So I'm worried too, if a demon god and a human can have offspring, I'm not sure..."

"Well, we need to check the records to see if any demons mated with humans during the Demon God War." Gan Yu quickly tried to change the subject; this topic was too sensitive, and Rosalin, who had just emerged from her gloom, couldn't keep thinking about it. "Um... how are your injuries? We both forgot about them, let's go to the medicine hut quickly!"

Rosalyn only belatedly remembered that she had previously cut open her back with a knife, destroying the red holy mark on her back that symbolized Shen Liang to show her fierceness. But so long ago, she had forgotten that she had such a serious injury, and surprisingly... it didn't hurt much.

With no one around, the two quickly found a corner to hide. Gan Yu lifted the back of her blood-stained clothes; the blood had dried, and as she pulled them apart, layers of scabs broke off.