Ice Vapor Goddess

Chapter 48 Canonization
Xilun turned his head and looked at him anxiously.

Kyle leaned closer and said in a deep voice, "Not all knights who are strong enough can become Royal Knights simply by being conferred a title."

"...Long ago, there was no such thing as a royal knight. A knight was to find his ideal and mission to wield the sword through trials and tribulations, and then walk the path of legend, practice his ideal, and spread his name. When his legend and virtues spread to one country after another, and when his name can represent the spirit and will of the knight, he will become a legend."

"Later, the twelve knights submitted to King Alfred, acknowledged his ideals, and wielded their swords for his ideals, becoming the first royal knights."

"A knight must truly acknowledge the one who bestows the title, be willing to give his life for him, and pave the way for his ideals. The one who bestows the title must also acknowledge and shoulder the knight's dedication, firmly choose him, practice and lead the proclaimed path, and live up to the knight's trust."

"This is the most solemn and dignified ceremony, forging a sacred and all-encompassing contract. Once the bestower betrays his original goal, the knight will lose all power, because from this moment on, his knightly path exists for you."

Kyle stroked Logan's broken body: "I believe he gave you everything he had, but... are you really willing to bestow this title upon him wholeheartedly?"

Xilun remained silent.

Mathilde looked at him with confusion and anxiety, wondering what he was doing at a time like this.

Wasn't he completely willing? But why?
“He has sacrificed too much,” Xiren said in a low voice. “He has given his life for me twice, and now I have to order him to give his life to me again, to fight for me... How can I bear it? I want to save him, but I don’t want him to suffer for me again.”

The three lowered their heads, unsure of what to say.

Suddenly, Mathilde grabbed Siren's shoulder: "So, you want him to rest in peace like this?"

“I…” Xiren did not look her in the eye.

“His sacrifice feels too heavy for you to bear, so would you feel better if he died?” Mathilde looked at him, her eyes calm and tinged with sadness.

She didn't understand psychoanalysis, but her gaze was the first time that Xiren found it unbearable.

Perhaps the only thing he couldn't analyze was himself.

He rejected Mathilde's sharp criticism, but he also refused to undergo psychoanalysis himself.

“You are a coward.” She looked at Xilun seriously, without any hint of accusation. “You are only willing to give, but you can’t bear the burden of others’ giving. You seem to love everyone, but you are unwilling to truly bear the responsibility of loving someone or being loved by someone.”

"You seem to be running away from this world. You can easily leave a relationship that only you have bestowed favors upon. You are like an angel who has descended to earth. No one can make you feel indebted. Only you are bestowing favors. It is as if you will leave this place after you have redeemed this world."

Mathilde looked at him, and the emotions surging in her eyes made Siron instinctively run away.

Am I... running away from this world?
He thought blankly, but no matter what, he was unwilling to analyze himself, as if analyzing himself would reveal his deepest trauma, or rather, his symptoms.

“Your Excellency.” Kyle looked at Siron, and after hearing Mathilde’s words, he understood as well. He glared at him angrily, “You would rather Logan die than owe him a life and order him to fight for you for the rest of his life?”

"If he's dead, you can certainly vent your grief and proclaim your sorrow at his grave, because you know you no longer owe him anything! You don't have to repay his life, and you don't have to look into his eyes that he sacrificed for you!"

Xilun sat dejectedly on the ground, seemingly resigned to his fate, without uttering a word.

Mathilde looked at him, her divine sense gradually drying up, her last chance slipping away, and she began to feel anxious.

It was a very simple matter—to conscientiously bestow titles upon a fallen knight.

He could establish himself in the city with the remnants of the church, but he couldn't do something so simple.

He was like an angel descended to earth; he was happy to bestow favors but unwilling to receive favors from others.

He would rather let Logan die than order him to pledge allegiance to him again and bear the pressure and responsibility that comes with the loyalty of another. “Your Excellency,” Kyle said, “have you ever loved anyone? I don’t mean the universal love of the Church, but a unique, privileged love, the kind of love you have for your parents, your brothers and sisters, your wife.”

Xilun paused for a moment: "...Yes."

“Then you should understand.” He walked over to Logan. “When faced with that kind of love, you have nothing else to give in return. He doesn’t want money, power, or strength. The only thing you can give is your love.”

“We all entered the church’s training camp from a young age, and the instruction we received was to love the priests who would be ordained to us in the future as if they were our Heavenly Father.”

"So even though the captain is an upright person, he didn't like your past reputation and actions, and was sulking before he came, he would still sacrifice for you at the critical moment."

"So Logan would give you everything without ever asking for anything in return, nor would he require you to repay him."

Xilun stared blankly.

“Do you understand? You have nothing else to repay Logan’s sacrifice, a tragic sacrifice that was irrational and fanatical, and he doesn’t need any reward from you,” he said.

"The only thing you can do is admit that you owe him, admit that you have to bear the burden of his choices and sacrifices, admit that you are the most important person to him, and respond to him with the most fervent and steadfast attitude."

Xilun sat there, tears streaming down his face. He didn't know why he was crying, but he just felt like crying for no reason.

“You have thirty seconds left,” Mathilde said, lying weakly on the ground, her body radiating a faint glow.

Xilen scrambled to her feet and grabbed Logan's hand.

He embraced Logan—embracing the twisted and charred body.

He no longer felt empathy, pity, or the suffering of others.

It is not love, but love that is unparalleled, a love that is both sacrifice and joy, a love that is without regret and a love that is at peace.

When Logan embraced death, he felt no pain whatsoever, only the joy of sacrificing himself for love.

“You’re happy, aren’t you?” Siren smiled through her tears, while the spirit within Logan leaped with joy for the first time.

“You consider this an honor, and you walk toward death without any regrets,” he said softly.

“But I still need you, Logan. I need you to stand up again and wield your sword for me, to clear the path of enemies for me, to put that armor on me again, and to proclaim my way with steel and holy light.”

The light shone, danced, and pulsated with excitement.

"Logan, I command you—kneel down, accept my investiture, swear your love and loyalty, swear that you are willing to become my knight, swear that you will protect and uphold my ideals, and swear that your sword will only be drawn for me from now on."

Then a point of light flew out from Logan's chest, the Holy Spirit sang in the void, and Mathilde collapsed unconscious from exhaustion.

The translucent spirit knelt before Siron.

"Yes, Bishop Siron."

He said so.

“—I do.”

(End of this chapter)