Peninsula: My cheat code is unscientific

Chapter 111 Variety Show in Progress (3.2K)

He sighed, clearly caught up in Jiang Che's twisted logic:

"Alright, alright, I can't argue with you. How about this, since everyone's here... let's try filming it first, but let's make it clear upfront that if the effect isn't good, or if there are any problems, I'll definitely cut it out in post-production."

"No problem, PD-nim, don't worry. Thank you, PD-nim, you're truly the best PD in the world!" After saying that, Jiang Che hung up the phone without waiting for a reply.

On the other end, PD Na looked at his phone, not knowing whether to laugh or cry. This attitude of using people when they need them and discarding them when they don't is so reminiscent of "Running Man".

Jiang Che turned to Shirley, raising an eyebrow smugly:

"It's settled! Although the PD said it might be cut if the effect isn't good, at least he agreed to let you participate first. Once you participate, you'll be inseparable from me."
He can't cut me out too, can he? If all else fails, the two of us can go find Kang Ho-dong oppa and become triplets. He can't possibly cut all three of us out, can he?

The VJ next to him was shaking when he heard this.

Sulli looked at the "Yoona unnie" in front of her who seemed to be glowing, and for a moment she was speechless.

She didn't expect that the other person would actually do something for her—in a culture on the peninsula that values ​​senior-junior relationships, daring to make a request to the PD, and even succeeding.

She quickly lowered her head, rubbed her eyes to hide her embarrassment, and when she looked up again, she revealed a big smile, her eyes curving into crescent moons:
"Okay! Thank you, unnie!"

"No need to thank me, let's go. I'll show you my room first, and then we'll wait for Kang Ho-dong and the production crew to arrive."

Jiang Che naturally took her wrist: "By the way, if you feel uncomfortable anywhere during filming, just tell me and I'll help you figure out a solution!"

"Inside"

Sherry was pulled forward by Jiang Che. Looking at the slender yet inexplicably reassuring figure in front of her, she looked back at the corner of the sofa where she had just sat, feeling as if she were in a dream.

Jiang Che led Shirley into the room booked by the production team. After glancing around, he couldn't help but nod in approval. The room was spacious and bright, especially the large bed in the middle, which was so big and long that it felt like three people could lie down in it.

He couldn't help but sigh:
"PD Na is indeed a good person."

Shirley watched from the side and couldn't help but smile.

After settling their simple luggage, the two chatted casually, with Shirley doing most of the talking and Jiang Che listening, occasionally interjecting with a joke that made Shirley's eyes crinkle with laughter.

Time passed by minute by minute.

Ten minutes, twenty minutes... half an hour...

Jiang Che, who had initially been calm and collected, gradually began to feel bored. His gaze swept around the room, finally settling on the VJ:

"VJ, did you bring your cards? How about... the three of us play cards?"

VJ: "???" The camera suddenly shook in protest.

Shirley was both amused and exasperated:
"Unnie... is still filming..."

"What's wrong with filming? Playing cards is also an important way to promote communication..." Jiang Che was trying to spread his fallacies when a series of panting wails came from outside the door.

"Aigu... I'm exhausted..."

"This BJ is way too big..."

"I almost didn't get my 50 yuan back..."

The door was open, and Kang Ho-dong, Lee Soo-geun, and Eun Ji-won appeared in the doorway, covered in sweat and looking disheveled, as if they had just finished a marathon.

Kang Ho-dong spotted Kang Cheol sitting leisurely on the sofa at a glance. Just as he was about to complain, his gaze suddenly stopped, and he looked in surprise at the girl next to Kang Cheol who was wearing a hat and trying to make her presence known.

Lee Soo-geun and Eun Ji-won also noticed Sulli, and their faces showed surprise at the same time—what is Sulli of F(x) doing here?

Seeing this, Jiang Che grabbed Shirley's shoulder and started spouting nonsense with a straight face:

"Let me formally introduce you all, this is my long-lost twin sister, Lin Xueli! Surprised? Unexpected?"

There was a two-second silence.

Kang Ho-dong, Lee Soo-geun, and Eun Ji-won exchanged glances, then all looked at Kang Cheol with expressions as if they were looking at an idiot.

Kang Ho-dong's criticism may be late, but it has arrived:

"Hey! Yoona! Do you think we're Pap?!"

“Exactly! This is clearly Shirley!” Lee Soo-geun chimed in.

Yin Zhiyuan then added quietly:
"You even change people's surnames so casually..."

Jiang Che chuckled and then began to introduce the subject seriously:

"Okay, okay, just kidding. It's Sherry. She happens to be in Beijing too, so I invited her to come and hang out with us. PD-nim has already agreed."

The three of them then realized what was going on. Although they were still a little curious about the details, they didn't ask any more questions and greeted Shirley. Shirley also quickly bowed politely in return.

Before they could exchange more than a few pleasantries, PD Luo's sinister voice rang out from behind the three of them:

"Now that everyone's here... well, last one, Kang Ho-dong! Please go back to your room and accept your punishment!"

The staff promptly handed over the classic skincare set—a bright red floral print thermal top and trousers.

Kang Ho-dong's face instantly contorted into a bitter expression.

When he changed into his bright red thermal underwear and reappeared, looking all coy, the whole room erupted in thunderous laughter.

Jiang Che gasped, then abruptly raised his hand to cover Shirley's eyes beside him:

"Shirley, you're still young, don't look at this! It'll give you nightmares! It'll give you a sty!"

Shirley was suddenly covered in the eyes. She was stunned for a moment, and then her shoulders began to tremble slightly, clearly trying her best to suppress her laughter.

"Hey! Im Yoona!" Kang Ho-dong was already extremely embarrassed, and when Kang Cheol teased him like that, he became furious and made to rush over and teach this disrespectful maknae a lesson.

Lee Soo-geun and Eun Ji-won quickly stopped him while laughing: "Ho-dong hyung, calm down! Calm down!"

"Let me go! I'm going to teach this girl a lesson about the authority of a senior!"

Li Shougen tried to persuade him while pulling him away:
"Brother! Have you forgotten the trending topic from before? Yoona seems to know... kung fu! What if we can't beat her..."

Jiang Hudong paused for a moment.

Eun Ji-won added insult to injury from the sidelines:

"Besides, brother, if you hit a girl, it's shameful if you win; it's even more shameful if you lose. Either way, it's shameful, so why bother?"

Kang Ho-dong: "..."

Seeing that the time was right, Jiang Che quickly stepped in to offer a way out, and began showering the other person with compliments:

"Oh my, Oppa, you look really good in this outfit, it really brings out your style. This vibrant Chinese red symbolizes your passionate heart and boundless enthusiasm! No wonder you're the nation's MC, you look great in everything you wear, you're a true fashion trendsetter!"

Even though Kang Ho-dong knew it was all fake, who could resist Yoona's compliments? He couldn't help but smile sheepishly.

Lee Soo-geun & Eun Ji-won: "..."

Shirley blinked as she watched this dramatic scene unfold. This unnie... seemed a little strange.
This attitude of completely disregarding the rules between seniors and juniors was something she had never seen in Yoona unnie before.

After the farce ended, the next challenge began. The group arrived at a unique Chinese restaurant's private room. The waiter handed them a menu, a thick menu filled with dense Chinese characters, without a single picture.

PD Luo, holding a small megaphone, said with a smile:
"Everyone, an important part of this spiritual journey is tasting local cuisine and experiencing its food culture. Next is a culinary selection task: you need to correctly choose the dish I've specified from the menu—Stewed Beef Brisket with Enoki Mushrooms."
If you choose the wrong dish, you have to eat all the wrong dishes before you can continue choosing, until you choose the right one. If you choose the right one, you will get a Dragon Ball.

"What??" Kang Ho-dong held the menu, his eyes almost crossed from looking at it.

Lee Soo-geun and Eun Ji-won also frowned at the menu, which looked like gibberish.

PD Na glanced at Kang Cheol and added:

"To prevent anyone from cheating, Yoona-ssi, you are not allowed to ask the waiter any information, not even a single word."

Jiang Che nodded obediently on the surface: "Okay~ I know, PD-nim."

He chuckled to himself, 'Looks like this PD only thinks I'm good at spoken English, he doesn't know I can read Chinese characters?'

His eyes darted around, an idea forming in his mind. His gaze swept over the menu, then he glanced at the three men arguing heatedly—

"This? These words look like..."

"That can't be right, can it? I'm sure it's not that."

"Damn, all Chinese characters look pretty much the same!"

Taking advantage of the chaos, he quietly leaned close to Shirley's ear and whispered:

"Sherry, what do you want to eat? I'll order for you."

Shirley had just felt a heat and a slight itch near her ear when she heard these words, and was immediately surprised, asking in a low voice:
"Unnie...you know Chinese characters?"

Jiang Che made a smug "shh" gesture, winked, and laughed, "I know a little, I know a little."

Shirley immediately smiled, her eyes curving into beautiful crescents. Intrigued, she leaned close to Jiang Che's ear and whispered:

"Unnie, what do you have?"

Jiang Che immediately transformed into a human translator, pointing at the menu and whispering:

"This is spicy chicken, super spicy; this is braised pork, sweet; this is steamed fish, mild..."

Shirley listened with great interest, feeling like she was opening a blind box. She hesitated for a moment, then quietly named a few dishes she wanted to eat.

"OK"

So, the art style changed to this—

Jiang Che pointed to a dish and said confidently to his three older brothers:

"Oppa! Trust me! This is definitely true!"

The three were skeptical, but seeing the certainty in his tone, they chose to believe him.

Result... Error!
The three of them looked at the dishes that were served and were speechless. They could only share the food.

After finally finishing our meal, it was time for the second round.

Jiang Che then pointed to another dish, his tone even more certain:
"This time it's definitely right! Trust me! I can speak Chinese!"

After some hesitation, the three chose to believe again.

The result... was wrong again!

The three of them: "..." picked up their chopsticks with tears in their eyes.

After eating two more rounds, the three of them were dazed and slumped in their chairs, motionless.

"Hey! Yoona! Are you crazy?!"
"Yoona, please... let Oppa go..."

Shirley looked at the three of them, who had been tricked so badly, and then glanced at the innocent-looking Jiang Che. She couldn't help but lower her head, her shoulders trembling slightly, and she couldn't help but laugh secretly. She thought that this unnie was too interesting today.

After that, the three of them stopped trusting Jiang Che and started ordering food themselves. As a result, the empty plates piled up higher and higher, and their bellies grew rounder and rounder.

Jiang Che saw that Shirley had almost finished eating, and then thought about the three older brothers—he felt that if they ate any more, they would really throw up. He didn't want one person to vomit and all four of them to suffer, so he decided to close the net.

He cleared his throat, his expression more serious than ever before:
"Oppas! Please trust me one last time! If I make a mistake again, I'll wear Kang Ho-dong's thermal underwear and eat all these plates."

(End of this chapter)