He lives on another planet and is majoring in Earth Science.

Chapter 45 Shark Baby Goes Viral Online
Li Ji stared at the white cubicle door as if he were gazing at the gates of hell.

The clear water flowing from the crack in the door was the water of the River Styx.

It is said that Achilles gained immortality by soaking in this water.

The red logo on the doorknob slowly turned green, like a hellhound opening its fierce eyes, ready to devour him at any moment.

Li Ji pulled up his pants and left, pretending nothing had happened.

The door opened with a "bang," and Shark Baby shouted from inside, "Dad, I think I broke the toilet!"

The ceramic toilet behind him was shattered, and clear water was splashed everywhere.

A fist-sized, spiral-shaped black solid stood amidst the ruins.

Fortunately, land shark excrement is not water-soluble, otherwise the scene would have been even more unsightly.

Li Ji walked towards the sink without looking back.

He remembered the lesson from the movie—a real man never looks back at an explosion.

People around were talking amongst themselves: "Whose child is this?"

Li Ji silently washed his hands, muttering to himself, "Whose kid is this? Honestly, he's such a worry for his parents."

The man who couldn't urinate turned to Li Ji and shouted, "Brother, your son's in trouble, come quick!"

All eyes turned to Li Ji.

Ignoring the stares of the crowd, he turned and left without a trace of regret.

"father!"

Shark rushed over and grabbed Li Ji's leg.

Lee Ki gritted his teeth, feeling the intense gazes of those around him like boiling water being poured over his head.

Shark Baby blinked her clear, big eyes at him.

If I ever want to be your dad again, I'm an idiot!
The concerned voices of the older brothers could be heard from the surrounding area.

"Quickly check if he's injured."

"This shopping mall is really something, how can the toilets be of such poor quality?"

"Don't worry, brother. I've already complained to the mall, and their manager will be here to handle it right away."

Things didn't seem to go as Li Ji had imagined.

Everything makes perfect sense; who would believe that a child could blow up a toilet?

The manager arrived quickly, shook Li Ji's hand, and kept apologizing, making Li Ji feel a little embarrassed.

Shark Baby was completely confused.

Why should the other party apologize to us when we ruined the toilet?

Shouldn't we be the ones apologizing to the other party?

Earthlings are so strange.

This doubt reached its peak when the manager transferred the two thousand yuan compensation to Li Ji.

Shark gave up thinking.

"I'm a terrible student, I don't understand."

Li Ji stared blankly at the extra two thousand yuan in his phone, his mind buzzing.

It turns out that as long as your behavior is beyond human comprehension, they automatically rationalize it for you.

Professor Wilde in the monitoring room also had a buzzing head; the holographic projection had just been restored when she saw this scene.

She exhausted all her knowledge of Earth, but still couldn't figure out the connection between Li Ji going to the toilet and earning 2000 Earth currency.

Looking at the 101 points that automatically appeared on the list next to him, Wilde fell into deep thought.

It seems my worries were unnecessary. Li Ji perfectly demonstrated the toilet behavior of earthlings, earning him a perfect score from the demanding AI.

But why can you make money by going to the toilet?

Oscar Wilde recalled her early experiences on Earth, where she saw people dancing on the roadside, and a crowd would gather around to watch and tip them with Earth currency.

"Could it be that Li Ji's performance in the toilet was so lively that it attracted donations from Earthlings?"

Oscar Wilde scratched his unreachable chin: "It's something only an earthling could do."

She then recalled another characteristic of Earthlings: they are a race-obsessed species, holding competitions for all sorts of meaningless things, with winners receiving prize money.

She once had the privilege of witnessing a stinky shoe contest held in America, where the person with the stinkiest shoes would win a prize.

A foul odor had lingered in my body for many years, and I only had it surgically removed last year.

"I never imagined that Earthlings had become so absurd, even holding competitions for going to the toilet?"

"No wonder they are the most boring race in the entire interstellar space, no wonder they can't achieve civilization upgrades."

If this idea is true, wouldn't that mean that Li Ji won a prize in the toilet-going competition against Earthlings?

Wilde was initially worried that Li Ji's physical structure would prevent him from getting a high score in this mission, but he was completely wrong. His toilet posture was even more standard than that of an Earthling!

The holographic projection suddenly flashed, and Delulu's projection was reactivated.

With a full beard and wearing a bright red dress, Dailulu excitedly wriggled out of the cubicle. "Mommy!"

All eyes turned to Li Ji again, and they were all so shocked that their eyes almost popped out.

"Don't yell like that!"

A relieved smile actually appeared on the face of the man who couldn't urinate.

"Brother, I understand you. That's what caused my illness too."

"You know nothing!"

Lee Ki-gu returned to the hotel, and the three of them slumped onto the sofa.

Delulu smiled and said, "What a beautiful day, meow!"

Shark Baby kicked its short legs, which were dangling in the air, with a grin: "Today was so much fun!"

Li Jisheng, utterly despondent and ashen-faced, said, "I want to die."

The only task left on the to-do list is "making friends," which I can complete tomorrow when I take Shark to play basketball.

Li Ji only hoped to get more points this time and raise his overall GPA, which was just barely passing.

To achieve a remarkable turnaround from being at the bottom of the class to being number one in my major, I must strive for every single point.

He silently took out his phone and scrolled through short videos.

"Three foreign women illegally entered the Sheldon Hotel in Binjiang District, Hangzhou. They opened the room door lock by unknown means and stayed there for one night."

Dairuru was drawn by the sound and came closer.

"Isn't this our hotel cat?"

"The three foreign women have been arrested. They had no identification documents on them, only a letter of introduction from Shigejie Commune and a stack of grain coupons."

"The police are still investigating the specific circumstances."

"Aren't those Nini and the others? Now I know how they managed to check in,"

Scroll down a few more lines, and a familiar figure appears.

"that's me!"

Shark pointed at the screen and shouted excitedly.

On the screen, Shark Baby deftly bites the Xiangguo phone in half, and this action is played on a loop.

The caption reads: "Fragrant Fruit Phone, Crunchy and Delicious."

Scroll down further and you'll find endless fan-made content featuring Shark Baby.

The entire internet is filled with videos imitating Shark Baby biting into Xiangguo's phone.

Many people said that their own cucumbers are not so easy to bite through.

"You seem to be quite popular on Earth, meow."

Am I going to become a global superstar?

Shark Baby looked at Li Ji excitedly.

Lee Ki was so amused by the video that he was doubled over with laughter and couldn't say a word.

He's now very interested to see how Xiangguo Company reacts.

Soon I saw the press conference briefing from Xiangguo Company.

"Xiangguo Company has provided a quality inspection report for the phone, which shows that it is fully qualified. As for why the phone was bitten off, the reason is still under investigation. The company is currently actively trying to contact the person involved."

The marketing account angrily denounced: "Is Xiangguo Company treating consumers like fools?"

"The quality inspection report is completely satisfactory?"

"If the phone is really not defective, why would this kid bite it off?"

"This is an American conspiracy. They put poison in the cell phones and made them so crispy that our children would eat them."

"Our children will become deformed; Americans are poisoning our next generation!"

"This is the true face of America!"

"Xiangguo Company's stock price has fallen by 3% today. They have started a large-scale campaign to report and delete videos."

"Brothers and sisters, don't compromise! Like, share, and save this video! We can't surrender to capital!"

"These marketing accounts these days are really good at making up nonsense."

After saying that, Li Ji silently liked, saved, and forwarded the post, and even recommended it.

Shark also took out her phone and started watching videos, just like her.

"What are you looking at?"

"Basketball. I need to get ready for tomorrow's basketball-themed social event."

Li Ji glanced at the screen and was surprised to find that even in 2025, a search for "basketball" still yielded the same video.

(End of this chapter)