Who would study psychology if they didn't have some kind of problem?

Chapter 323 Finding joy in hardship doesn't necessarily mean suffering.
Teacher Zhao couldn't help but laugh out loud; clearly, many teachers at Jiangyi Middle School are like that.

Nan Zhuren steered the conversation back on track: "Due to time constraints, I don't know exactly what miscellaneous tasks you were assigned, so I can only give one example, 'freedom of attitude,' as a demonstration."

Nan Zhuren thought for a moment: "Let's imagine this scenario—a patient loses a lower limb in a traffic accident and is therefore in pain. Pain itself has no real meaning; it's just 'pain'. But as interventionists, we can give meaning to pain by guiding them to experience it, thereby improving the patient's subjective experience and mindset even though the 'pain' still exists."

“For this patient, we can first acknowledge his suffering and say, ‘You have indeed encountered misfortune.’ Then we can give his suffering a new meaning: ‘You can now try to experience the world from a new perspective, and at the same time compile your feelings and insights into a book to help more people.’”

“When using this method on others, you should be careful with your wording, otherwise it may be seen as ‘talking without understanding the situation’ or ‘being sarcastic,’ which could lead to you getting beaten up.”

This little joke made Teacher Zhao's lips curl into a smile.

“At the same time—” Nan Zhuren said specifically, “this is actually a kind of ‘finding joy in suffering’, so it is important to acknowledge the existence of ‘suffering’.”

“But many people now skip or even deny the step of ‘acknowledging suffering,’ which is absolutely unacceptable. You must be mindful of this when you practice this technique yourself or even use it on others.”

Nan Zhuren added, “This technique cannot eliminate suffering, nor can it turn bad things into good things. Just as you cannot make a patient grow legs, you cannot tell him ‘it’s better to have no legs than to have legs’—it only alleviates the degree of pain and gives it meaning.”

Nan Zhuren became particularly serious when he said this.

Many excellent philosophical ideas and advanced techniques have become ambiguous and meaningless because they have been used out of context.

The problems that Nan Zhuren is currently dealing with, such as those involving Li Mingchen and Xu Pengcheng, are, in a sense, a result of this.

Nan Zhuren then used Teacher Zhao's own experience as an example: "For instance, 'your boss forces you to do chores.' Even if you eventually change your attitude towards this matter, or even gain something from doing the chores—the things your boss makes you do are still 'chores,' and they are indeed 'forced' by your boss to do them. These two points will not change."

Teacher Zhao suddenly reached out and pressed his index finger against his temple, revealing an expression like that of the wise Ikkyu-san who had just had an epiphany.

"Like this time, Lao Ma arranged for me to be your assistant, Professor Nan—although I was indeed very fortunate to meet Professor Nan and have learned a lot, it doesn't mean I should thank Lao Ma, because I should thank Professor Nan."

"At the same time, I can't accept any more odd jobs that Lao Ma assigns me in the future, because I may not... no, I may never meet Teacher Nan again, or even someone similar to Teacher Nan."

Teacher Zhao pondered, "When I have no choice but to suffer, I can only try to find sweetness in bitterness; but if possible, next time I should choose not to suffer?"

Old Ma... oh, I mean Vice Principal Ma, right?

This sounds strange, but the underlying principle is correct.

Nan Zhuren did not offer any comment on Teacher Zhao's "insight".

He simply reiterated his understanding: "If possible, we should not let things develop to the point of 'freely changing attitudes,' but rather stop at the point of 'freely choosing.'"

Teacher Zhao listened to a little bit of what was said.

Then, his expression started to look a little strange.

……

click-

Having finished collecting data, Chonghui, who was sitting outside organizing the data, looked up and saw Teacher Zhao, with a strange expression, walking out of the consultation room.

His expression then became inexplicable.

"You..." After Teacher Zhao left, he pointed at Nan Zhuren, "You gave her a consultation?"

Nan Zhuren shrugged: "I know what you're going to say, a 'dual relationship,' right? But I'm giving her peer supervision." Chonghui paused for a moment: "No, what I'm actually worried about is 'transfer of affection.' But considering what we're doing now, letting her 'transfer her affection' to you isn't necessarily a bad thing..."

Nan Zhuren's gaze immediately shifted to the side.

"What's wrong? Did she pay you for the consultation? Did she sign an informed consent form? There's no ethical obligation between you as a client and a therapist."

Nan Zhuren slowly shifted her gaze back, thought for a moment, and then looked away again.

Chonghui sensed something was wrong: "Hey, you haven't fallen for someone else, have you?"

This is naturally impossible.

Nan Zhuren shook his head: "It's just that I can empathize with the problems she encountered. I see these students every day in this school, and I can clearly see something on their faces... but I can't do anything to intervene."

Chonghui breathed a sigh of relief: "Oh, so it was just [empathy]."

He turned his gaze back to the computer screen, and after looking at it for a while, he found himself unable to concentrate on his work.

Since it was lunch break anyway, Chonghui simply turned around and asked, "When she came out just now, she looked very thoughtful. It seems like you had a deep and successful conversation?"

Nan Zhuren nodded: "We had an existential dialogue."

Chonghui blinked, surprised, and asked, "You were talking about philosophy with her?"

Chonghui, who is in the micro-expression analysis research group, is strictly speaking also a behaviorist.

However, given Chonghui's knowledge and experience, he immediately realized: "[Existentialism]... finding joy in hardship, it's indeed very suitable for Teacher Zhao's situation."

Nan Zhuren, however, noticed a blind spot in Chonghui's words: "I don't think I've told you what her problem is yet?"

Chonghui waved his hand, indicating that he had seen this situation many times before.

"When a school counselor first starts working in a middle school, there will be some adjustment issues. The more a teacher feels a sense of mission in mental health education, the greater the internal conflict will be."

Nan Zhuren pondered for a moment: "Then, senior brother, how did you handle this situation before?"

Chonghui said matter-of-factly, "I won't solve it."

Okay, that concludes the conversation.

Nan Zhuren pulled over another chair, opened a set of postgraduate entrance exam practice questions, and prepared to try out a set to see how it went.

"It's only been a few months and you're already doing practice problems? Don't waste the real exam questions..."

Chonghui scratched his head: "Never mind, the students should have finished getting their food by now. Do you want me to go to the cafeteria and bring you some back?"

The words were spoken, but there was no response.

He turned around and found that Nan Zhuren was asleep, slumped over the table.

"..."

(End of this chapter)