Am I being simulated by their love affair.

Chapter 442 The Relationship Furthest From Love
When Jun Matsueda met Yosei Kurusu at the apartment entrance, she was leaning against the railing in the hallway, looking lost in thought.

The girl's forearms were folded on the stone railing, like a student in class, looking well-behaved and quiet.

Jun Matsue rarely saw the "quiet" Yosuke Kurusu; he wasn't referring to the girl's physical movements, but rather to her overall demeanor.

Yosei Kurusu always exudes a certain energy that influences everyone around him.

And now she is temporarily lying low.

The girl was wearing a loose gray sweatshirt, black shorts that barely covered her thighs, and dark gray knee-high socks, a more casual outfit than any Jun Matsue had ever seen her dressed.

She didn't notice Jun Matsue standing at the end of the corridor. Instead, she changed her posture, bent over slightly, and let her arms bear more of her body weight. The girl looked up, gazing at something. Outside the corridor, the autumn wind was blowing and the trees were rustling, sounding like it was raining.

Matsueda Jun approached the girl. A gust of wind blew into the corridor, making her long hair flutter. Kurusu Yosei blinked, staring at the falling leaves drifting gently down in front of him.

When the boy's footsteps reached her ears, Yosuke Kurusu turned around and looked at Jun Matsueda, who was standing still.

"I didn't think you'd be back so soon." Jun Matsue suddenly felt a little tongue-tied, unsure of what to say.

The girl deliberately put on a stern face, with an arrogant expression, "Why can't I come back? You're my roommate, this isn't just your home, it's mine too!"

"Yes, yes." The boy smiled.

The bright yet slightly melancholic girl he had just seen seemed to be just his imagination.

So why are you standing at the door?

Yosuke Kurusu pouted, "I left in such a hurry yesterday that I forgot my keys."

"I'll open the door for you right away." Jun Matsue switched the plastic bag containing the ingredients from his right hand to his left hand and took out the key from his pocket.

The girl didn't take a step; she simply turned around and looked at the boy's back as he stood in front of the metal door.

“Matsue, I didn’t come back to pretend nothing happened.”

Jun Matsue paused for a moment.

"Ah."

"We haven't finished talking about what we were saying last night." She crossed her arms.

"Ah."

The boy put away his keys and pushed open the door. He didn't go inside, but turned his head and looked at the girl with a questioning gaze.

Looking inside the door, Yosei Kurusu saw the slippers on the entryway floor, the long dining table stretching as far as the eye could see, and her bag on it, containing the keys she had forgotten.

"But we're all hungry right now, so let's have a proper dinner first."

The girl, with her long hair flowing, walked past Jun Matsuoka and gracefully entered the living room.

"What would you like to eat tonight?" Jun Matsue asked as he walked into the kitchen and put on an apron.

"Didn't you already buy groceries?" Kurusu Yosei, sitting on the sofa, glanced at him. "I was just planning to cook whatever was available."

It seemed that trying to please her with such tricks was useless. He obediently washed his hands, chopped vegetables, and started cooking.

Jun Matsuo bought a simple set of groceries: seasonal mushrooms, some vegetables, and scallions, ginger, and garlic. He wasn't in a good mood today and planned to have some mushroom noodle soup to warm himself up.

He first threw the shiitake mushrooms into the pot and stir-fried them briefly, then threw all the other ingredients into the pot, added water and seasonings, and walked out of the kitchen while waiting for them to cook.

Since Yosuke Kurusu wasn't in the living room, he casually turned on the TV, trying to create some ambient noise. Hearing the noise, the girl peeked out from her bedroom.

"Is it time to eat?"

"Almost there, just a few more minutes." Jun Matsue kept changing channels with the remote control, trying to make himself look very busy.

The girl walked out of the bedroom and sat at the dining table, while the boy sat on the sofa, back to back.

"You must have been pretty free after school today, why didn't you go see your girlfriend?" Yosei Kurusu suddenly asked.

Jun Matsueda stopped changing the channel. "She's not in Tokyo right now." The girl didn't ask any more questions. He stared at the advertisement on the TV screen. Yosuke Kurusu looked at the camera, his eyes gleaming with an otherworldly light.

The soup pot simmering with mushrooms soon began to bubble and simmer. Jun Matsue returned to the kitchen and added vegetables and noodles.

As Jun Matsue placed the two bowls of mushroom noodles on the table, he quickly noticed something amiss—the girl was sitting in his usual spot.

"Didn't you want to watch TV?"

Yosuke Kurusu moved the bowl in front of him, picked up his chopsticks, and said, "I don't want to watch today."

The sound of two people slurping noodles filled the air at the dining table. Eating a bowl of steaming hot soup noodles on a gradually chilling autumn night is a very comforting thing.

However, a bowl of noodles alone seemed insufficient to completely calm their hearts.

"Although Songzhi's cooking skills aren't as good as mine, the food you make always tastes especially delicious to me—the kind of deliciousness that I can't replicate." The girl wiped her mouth.

“There are always some differences between Chinese and Japanese methods,” Jun Matsueda said with a smile.

Washing the dishes didn't take long. By the time the boy took off his apron and walked out of the kitchen, Yosuke Kurusu had already turned off the TV.

"Songzhi hasn't answered my question from last night yet," the girl said, looking into his eyes.

Why didn't you choose me to date?

Yosei Kurusu wants to figure out exactly where he went wrong.

Jun Matsue sighed inwardly and sat down on the sofa opposite the girl.

"Actually, I think our relationship is the furthest from being a romantic one."

Yosuke Kurusu's eyes widened as the boy continued.

"In my eyes, you are much more mature than me."

"I'm not just talking about age—your attitude towards life, your determination to pursue your dreams, and your charming personality."

"You previously told me to be your number one fan, and I gladly accepted."

"Because in my heart, I am the one who has always been watching you from outside the stage."

“You are already a very complete person—your life is self-consistent, you treat your dreams as a career, and you find pleasure in the process of achieving them. Even if I had never been there, you would have lived a very good life.”

"The good I'm talking about isn't the good in the conventional sense, but rather that you're taking control of your own life."

"Of course, this kind of Kurusu Yosei is very attractive to me, and there are many memorable moments from the time I spent living with you."

"But I can't see through you, and I can't control you."

"Do you really like me?"

"When we first met, you only asked me if I wanted to be in a relationship. Later, when you were making an album, you also said that you didn't understand what it felt like to be in a relationship."

"You've never told me you like me."

The TV series they watched together once said that a guy who doesn't even have the courage to confess his feelings is no good, and Jun Matsueda believes the same applies to girls.

"So I thought that 'audience' and 'fans' were our tacit understanding."

Fans don't pry into their idols' lives.

"Kiyoshi, what is your opinion of me?"

The girl sat down next to him.

"Then I'll tell you."

(End of this chapter)