The bard fantasized again.

Chapter 175 The Potential Murderer (9k9k)

The tranquility granted by the 'Sage's Blade' suppressed Jasmine's fear, allowing her to feel her injuries healing in a state of emotional calm.

She breathed a sigh of relief and wanted to thank him.

But suddenly I realized that I couldn't seem to find out what gratitude and relief felt like.

Her heart was filled with a serene indifference to everything, so much so that even her words of thanks sounded stiff.

"Thank you."

Fortunately, as her wounds healed and time passed, she gradually began to feel a fluctuation in her emotions.

But then a violent, repressed emotion followed, burning her nerves like fire, forcing veins and bulges on her rough skin, and her fingertips to stretch out like claws.

The pain wasn't as intense as when she was being bitten, allowing her to remain somewhat conscious and understand Tang Qi's question:

"It seems your constitution and luck aren't very good? It's possible that it's because the two months are approaching, which is when the beastly symptoms are most severe. This caused you to successfully resist the invasion of your beastly nature, but you couldn't withstand the erosion of the curse."

"Am I going to die?" Jasmine asked, somewhat fearfully.

"Doing nothing is what leads to death."

"what can I do?"

"Isolation and receiving guidance from a pastor can strengthen your will."

"But Dean Marian has not returned."

"She was corrupted by the curse of bestiality and harmed others to such an extent that she could not be saved—just like this child."

Tang Qi learned the general outline of what happened from the guards—

The orphanage director, Marianne, was a beastman lurking in the city. With the approach of the Double Moon, she could not resist the beastman's corruption, broke out of the courtyard, and bit the patrolling guard to death. It was that simple.

Tang Qi pointed to the unconscious, beast-like boy:
"When he was tearing at you, did you think he still recognized you?"

“But, but Dean Marian was never like this before. Someone came to her house and showed her something that made her like that.”

"And then? She bit the boy and was taken away by the guards. Then you secretly hid the boy, and finally let him bite you?"

Jasmine nodded:

"Yes, yes. Dean Marian did want to eat Bird, but she quickly came to her senses and left in tears—when we chased after her, we found that she had been stopped by the guards."

She simply expanded on some details.

Tang Qi frowned and said:
"So when the guards didn't know she bit Bird, they gave you plenty of time to hide Bird when they came to the orphanage to investigate, right?"

"Yes……"

Tang Qi nodded and changed the subject: "So you think there's more to this than meets the eye? Someone framed Dean Marian?"

"I do not know."

Chenxi stepped forward, about to make a promise, but Tang Qi suddenly stopped her and spoke first:

"So what are your plans after this? You don't look too good."

“I—I feel okay. And I’m afraid I might never come back.” Jasmine seemed very resistant to being quarantined.

Chenxi did not think this was a suitable decision.

She tried to dissuade him, but Tang Qi interrupted her beforehand:

“Since you’re so scared, I can’t very well force you. But I advise you to stay put in this basement, so that you don’t hurt your friends when you can’t hold on any longer.”

Jasmine looked at Tang Qi with some surprise:

"You're not going to take me with you?"

"I'm not a guard. Since you think it's okay, and your friends think it's okay, then you can bear the consequences yourselves. Why should I do something so thankless?"

Tang Qi looked at the beast-like Bird beside him.

"But this child can't stay here, right?"

“Bird, he…”

"Do you really think you kids can subdue a werewolf?"

"You're right..."

Tang Qi took the soup from the bedside table and placed it in Jasmine's hand:

"Then you should rest well. Let me take this older sister away first. If there's nothing else, she can come and protect you, okay?"

No, actually—

She looked at the dawn, shook her head with a complicated expression, and
"If possible, please don't help me anymore."

“I just want to make up for something as much as possible, even if you don’t need it,” Chenxi said hesitantly.

Jasmine took a deep breath and finally spoke the words that had been pent up in her heart for so long:
“I know you are atoning for the fact that you indirectly caused your brother’s death.”

I also know that you have helped me a lot behind the scenes, taught many bad people a lesson, and even this time, if it weren't for your help, I would have died here...

But even though I know my brother was a mercenary, the kind of mercenary who's not worth remembering even in death, and even though I know he did some bad things as a mercenary, I know you've helped me so much, perhaps I should forgive you—

But I just can't do it.

Whenever I receive your help, I feel a burning discomfort in my heart.

I feel I should be a forgiving person, after all, you saved me.

But I don't want to do that from the bottom of my heart. If I accept your kindness, then on whom should I place my resentment for my brother's death?
You might as well leave my sight forever, so I can never see you again, that way I can hate you forever—it will make me feel better.

"I……"

The black mist around Chenxi's neck began to leak out in all directions, even causing the fixed helmet to tremble.

She remained silent for a long time, until finally responding definitively:
"it is good."

Tang Qi had her carry the beast-like boy named Bird to say goodbye to Jasmine.

As he left the orphanage, he saw the other boys and girls there looking at him warily.

Tang Qi walked at the front, turned two corners, and greeted the guards he had met earlier:
"I just ran into a beastman who had fainted in a dead end."

"How did you manage to stumble upon this?"

The head guard, amidst his surprise and doubt, instructed Chenxi to put Bird down.

Bird's head had completely transformed into a wolf's head, leaving no doubt about his identity.

But when the routine full-body check was performed, the guards were amazed:

"Strange……"

"No wounds?" Tang Qi asked.

"You've already seen it beforehand?"

No, I guessed.

Tang Qi said knowingly,
"Then I'll leave him to you to handle."

As Tang Qi spoke, he urged Chen Xi to leave with him.

As dusk settled, clouds and fog obscured the evening sunlight, casting a gloomy gray over the entire Shenjing area.

Seeing that the paladin had remained silent the entire way, Tang Qi suddenly chuckled and asked:

"You're unhappy because the victim refused your atonement?"

His tone was mocking and sarcastic, which made Chenxi feel a pang of bitterness.
"I-I don't know."

"I know. Do you want me to tell you?" "No."

"What if you were to view it as 'having to confront inner challenges in order to hone your mind'?"

It's really easy to understand what's on Chenxi's mind.

Sure enough, after hearing the word 'challenge,' her resistance was no longer obvious:
"Okay, I can give it a try. Go ahead—"

Do you remember what you said when you told me you wanted to 'atone'?

Tang Qi repeated her answer from that day.
“You said, ‘Atonement is atonement, and it should never be aimed at obtaining forgiveness.’”

"Yes."

"You lied."

"I do not have."

"Don't make excuses. People are always in the habit of deceiving themselves—after all, the biggest lie in life is 'I think I can do it.'"

Tang Qi patted Chenxi on the shoulder, but this time the paladin turned away in annoyance.

But he continued to expose Chenxi's disguise, forcing her to confront her own heart:
"Did you know that in relationships there's a creature called a 'simp'?"

"what is that?"

"A pathetic creature, hopelessly immersed in self-pity, unable to extricate itself—"

They would spare no expense, spending money, time, and energy to pursue the person they love.

Whenever someone tries to dissuade him, saying, "Even if you fawn over that woman your whole life, you won't gain the slightest benefit," he would argue in this way—

'I love her, and that has nothing to do with her. I just want her to be happier, not to expect anything in return. Otherwise, it's a transaction, not true love.'

Chenxi pondered for a moment, then asked curiously:

"Why would I feel sorry for him? I think the impulse to risk everything for a goal is very romantic."

"Of course, I don't deny that this kind of thing is frank and romantic. But not many people can actually do it."

"I love you, but it has nothing to do with you." This sentence seems to be their romantic declaration, but in reality, it is just a helpless self-deception when they realize that "the other person really does have nothing to do with them."

Just like you—

Chenxi instinctively wanted to retort, but Tang Qi interrupted her first.

"Just like when you keep saying that even if you can't be forgiven, you will still do it."

Deep down, I was also hoping that 'if I keep atoning for my sins, she will eventually be moved and forgive me.'

There was a "bang" sound.

Chenxi's helmet was suddenly blown off by the expanding black mist.

This is the shame that comes after the truth is revealed.

She wanted to dig a hole in the ground, curl up inside, and never hear Tang Qi's voice again.

But Tang Qi picked up her helmet and placed it around her neck, continuing to dismantle her defenses:

"So when you realize that even though you've done so much—even saved her life—you still haven't been able to earn her forgiveness, you inevitably feel frustrated."

Dawn, you're not as resolute as you think.

A determined person won't be happy all day because of a single compliment.

"I'll only be happy for half a day," she stubbornly insisted, completely disregarding whether her rebuttal was logical or not.

"Because after half a day, you want to get new praise and new recognition, right?"

Having spent nearly three months together, Tang Qi had pretty much figured out her personality.

"It's like the honor you pursue. You're not pursuing the honor itself, but the value that honor brings and the sense of recognition it gives you."

Each time you complete a challenge, you will experience the satisfaction it brings.

For example, when you treat atonement as a challenge, forgiveness is your reward.

Unfortunately, not all atonement can be rewarded with forgiveness.

Tang Qi turned his head and found that Chen Xi was no longer walking beside him.

Looking back, the headless horseman stood motionless in the middle of the street, accepting the shame that came with this dissection.

She thought for a long time and remained silent for a long time.

But I still haven't received an answer:
"So how can I change this mindset?"

Tang Qi walked up to her and patted her on the shoulder.

This time, she accepted reality and didn't run away.

Tang Qi said:
"I'm telling you this not to change you, but to help you understand yourself—"

Then accept the fact that 'atonement may not bring forgiveness' so that you can get out of the gloom as soon as possible.

We're going to the magic academy next, so you don't cause any trouble because of your mood.

"I'm sorry to have worried you," Chenxi replied in a low, humming voice.

"Once you realize your own self-interest, does the feeling of not being forgiven make you feel less bad?"

Tang Qi said with a joking smile.

Chenxi got too into character; she started acting and ended up fooling herself.

"Yes, because I realized that my utilitarianism is indeed unforgivable—I will try to correct this flaw in my future challenges."

"Relax, everyone has flaws, even gods. Understanding yourself is the first step to becoming a better person."

Tang Qi waved his hand and pointed in the direction of the orphanage.
“On this point, that little girl Jasmine sees it much more clearly than you do.”

"Speaking of which, why did you interrupt me just now?"

Chenxi asked, puzzled.
Even knowing it's for personal gain, I still want to find out who's behind the persecution of Dean Marian.

"I interrupted you not to stop you from investigating the truth, but because I was afraid that you would make a vow without knowing the truth—"

You should at least know that they are a group of beastmen before you consider what to do.

"A group?" Chenxi asked, puzzled. "Isn't it just three...?"

"If I'm not mistaken, at least half of the children in the orphanage should have the blood of beastmen flowing through their veins."

"how is this possible?"

“Nothing is impossible. Otherwise, there’s no way to explain how a group of eleven or twelve-year-old children could hide their companion in the orphanage after he was bitten by the director.”

Tang Qi summarized the points of doubt.

"Longjincheng is a city that still values ​​human rights. When they encounter victims of bestiality, they simply isolate them in prison and have a pastor provide them with end-of-life prayers—"

This means that those victims who have recovered also have the opportunity to return to normal society.

But why were Dean Marian, and even Molly and Bird, so certain that 'taking them away would definitely lead to death'?

It's simply that they understand that they, or some of their companions, are indeed genuine 'beastmen'.

So you can investigate the truth behind Marianne's madness, but only if you understand that you're helping a group of thugs similar to Marianne, who could break out of the orphanage at any moment due to various accidents and wreak havoc in the streets.

For those who might suffer as a result, they are all potential murderers.

After all, if that person could drive Marian crazy, he could also drive them, these little kids, crazy.

(End of this chapter)