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Chapter 376 Exorcism
When Uncle Chen saw the 'funeral attendant,' his first thought was that he had been scammed.

He had lived for over sixty years and had seen all sorts of people from the lowest rungs of society—some hypocritical, some sleazy and cunning, some greedy, some penniless—but regardless...
They shouldn't be this young.

The man in front of me was wearing a tattered cotton-padded coat and always had a kind smile on his face. He looked completely harmless, but he was only about twenty years old at most. At that age, he might not even be able to complete his apprenticeship among those laborers. What ability did he have to do the job of exorcising evil spirits and sending away ghosts?

Are they desperate for money and trying to scam us out of some cash?

But that doesn't make sense. We can't even afford to eat, so where would we get the money to be swindled?
However, just as Chen Bo was wondering, the man suddenly spoke first.

"Old man"

Well, he seems to be a civilized person after all.

Uncle Chen rolled his eyes inwardly.

It wasn't that he despised civilized people, but rather that swindlers with some knowledge were the most troublesome—however, he was extremely confident in dealing with them, after all, what was that saying again?

Since I don't have a penny in my pocket, what can you do even if you're a master liar?
At this moment, the young man cleared his throat and continued speaking.

"Old man, I'm so sorry to bother you. I've fled here from famine and lost all my belongings, so I was wondering if you could spare me a meal and sell me some dry rations—of course, I certainly won't eat for free. I just heard from Brother Li that your place has been haunted lately, and I happen to be from the White Gate, so I'll see if I can perform a ritual to offset the cost of this meal."

Uncle Chen was taken aback, then finally realized what was going on.

In his mind, the other person was no longer a swindler—but a mentally challenged person who had reached a dead end and was trying to make a living.

Just kidding. If a meal could hire a gentleman, would I be so fussy about it?

However, looking at the other person's sallow face and then at that body that seemed as if it could be blown away by the wind, Uncle Chen suddenly thought of his own child who starved to death during the great disaster a few years ago.

If that child were still alive, he would be this age by now.

In the end, he softened and waved helplessly.

"We're out of proper food here, but Ershazi dug up a lot of root vegetables the other day. If you don't mind, we can still share some with you for a meal, but you have to leave as soon as you're done eating."

At this point, Uncle Chen seemed to have thought of something and began to ramble on.

"And I have to tell you something: even if you impersonate an official in the future, don't impersonate a funeral director. If you impersonate an official and the government catches you, they'll just chop your head off at most. But if you impersonate someone and get involved in something like superstition, then even dying will be a luxury."

The young man froze for several seconds, then suddenly showed an embarrassed expression.

"Wait, sir, I'm not..."

But before he could finish speaking, another commotion broke out on the other side.

Uncle Chen sighed, shook his head helplessly, ignored the young man, and walked towards the noisy place.

When he arrived at the location, he discovered that, sure enough, it was the same merchants who had come a few days earlier.

Of course, these so-called merchants were really just a bunch of guys carrying some odds and ends, traversing mountains and valleys to earn a meager living. They were hardly proper businessmen at all. And at this moment, these people were arguing heatedly with two families.

Uncle Chen frowned. Although he really didn't want to waste his energy, he was, after all, the village head, so he reluctantly interjected.

"Tell me, what happened?"

Upon seeing the manager approach, the vendor immediately began to complain.

"Old Chen, you've come at the right time—you be the judge! We're about to run out of food, and we just wanted to buy some from this family, but not only did they refuse to sell, they also started cursing us, telling us to get lost if we wanted to beg—is that human language? Besides, we've paid for our lodgings these past two days, why are we being treated like beggars?"

—I can't even be a beggar if I want to!

Hearing the pitiful voice, before the two households could reply, Uncle Chen spoke first.

"You're in business, you should know that if you want to buy something, someone has to sell it to you, right?"

".Yes?"

"But we're eating tree bark and grass roots ourselves, so how can we have any food to sell to you? Don't speak yet. Yes, we do have some millet and sorghum, but that's only for when we're absolutely desperate and need to escape. It's our life-saving food. How could we possibly sell it?"

Uncle Chen took a breath and then blurted out everything he had been holding back.

“I didn’t want you to enter the village in the first place. You said that the heavy snow a few days ago blocked the mountain and the road was difficult to travel, so I reluctantly let you in. But you’ve turned around and blamed us. And didn’t I tell you yesterday that this evil spirit might not be able to be suppressed and that you should leave as soon as possible? Why haven’t you moved yet?”

The vendor was speechless from the barrage of questions and could only stand there awkwardly. In the end, it was someone behind him who helped him out of the situation.

"I'm sorry, sir, let me apologize to him first—he was indeed a bit too hasty. But to be honest, it's not entirely his fault. This morning we just learned that the imperial court has blocked the roads into the city, saying they're checking for some wanted criminals. So it's not that we don't want to leave, it's that we simply can't."

The speaker was a man in his forties who looked like he had read some books, and his speech was fairly organized—and when he heard this man speak, Uncle Chen's expression improved slightly.

"Since you can't go forward, why don't you just go back the way you came?"

The man gave a wry smile.

"So that the old man knows, they bought this batch of goods with borrowed money. If they can't sell them in the next few days, every single one of them will have to jump into the river. And according to past years, the Qing government's search for rebels usually only lasts two or three days. Maybe the road will open soon."

"But that chaos..."

"We understand that too. When it's your turn to leave, we'll follow immediately. After all, we can tell what's more important."

"."

"."

After a brief exchange, Uncle Chen shook his head and left.

Anyway, it's the same old saying: you can't reason with a damned person. He thought he had done everything he could, and whether the rest of them wanted money or their lives was up to them.

However, when he returned to his own house, Uncle Chen was immediately dumbfounded.

Is this still my home?!

At this moment, a pair of bright red couplets are pasted on his door, with auspicious words written in particularly conspicuous ink. In the very center of the door, there is an even more eye-catching "福" (fortune) character.

Wait a minute, I've only walked for less than half an incense stick's time, how come my family is suddenly celebrating the New Year?

Before Uncle Chen could recover from his shock, he saw the idiot bring out two more pieces of red paper from the side door, wet them, and then try to stick them on the window.

Uncle Chen finally realized what was happening and quickly stopped him. "You idiot, what are you doing!"

The simpleton turned around, then scratched his head with a silly grin.

"Uncle Chen, you're back?"

"I'm back. No, wait, what have you been doing?"

The simpleton chuckled.

"Doing the work the funeral director instructed us to do, Uncle Chen, didn't you say that we had to run around because of that...that...that...that...that...that...but now that someone can handle it, we don't have to run around anymore, right?"

Before he could finish speaking, Uncle Chen rushed into the house in a great hurry.

At that moment, the always smiling young man was leaning over the table, holding a calligraphy brush he had somehow acquired, carefully writing auspicious words on a piece of paper.

Chen Bo immediately became anxious.

"What are you doing!"

After carefully finishing the last stroke, the young man looked up and smiled.

"I'm sorry, I noticed you weren't back for a while, and I felt that this evil spirit was about to materialize, so I started work ahead of schedule without your permission. I hope you can understand."

"I'll forgive your grandma's leg, you—"

Uncle Chen was about to curse out loud, but the moment he saw the young man's face, he swallowed all his words.

—His face wasn't exactly sincere, but for some reason, it always made people believe what he said.

and.

Although the couplets with the character "福" (fortune) he drew were made on the cheapest, roughest paper, the subtle marks on them were remarkable.
It was clearly no different from the spells I had seen back then.

No way, did we really run into a passing expert?
Chen Bo was suddenly overjoyed, but before he could speak, the young man spoke again.

"However, even though it's just an unfinished project, it's not something I can handle alone. I'd really appreciate your help."

Thanks to Uncle Chen's efforts, the entire village was quickly gathered together.

Looking at those villagers who were so thin they seemed like they could be blown away by the wind, and whose ribs were so prominent you could see them at a glance, the young man—Zhou You—sighed unconsciously.

It has been almost a month since he parted ways with his cheap master.

Of all that he has seen and heard, there is only one thing he can feel now.

That is, the world is more miserable than he imagined.

In fact, it has already crossed some of the lower limits.

In his memory, there was indeed a once-in-two-hundred-years famine at the end of the Qing Dynasty, called the Dingwu Famine, which starved to death more than ten million people, but it only lasted for two or three years, which does not match the current timeline at all.

Not to mention that the current Qing Dynasty is even worse than the one he remembered.

While the late Qing Dynasty was also a showcase of bizarre human behavior, it at least produced renowned ministers like Zeng Guofan and Zuo Zongtang who attempted to turn the tide, as well as many individuals who did practical work in dire straits. However, for some reason, these people seem to have vanished from history, replaced by a bunch of unheard-of scoundrels who are all incompetent and useless.

And most importantly
Something's wrong with this old lady.

However, he couldn't quite put his finger on what was wrong. Perhaps it was the bizarre process by which the Empress Dowager seized power and ascended to the throne, or perhaps it was because she watched the entire Qing Dynasty slowly descend into the abyss without taking any action, or perhaps it was simply some kind of premonition in her heart.
In short, he felt that this person was the biggest incongruity in the entire Qing Dynasty.

But just then, Uncle Chen came over and whispered something.

"Master, everything is prepared as you instructed. What should we do next?"

Zhou You looked at Uncle Chen, who was so obsequious that he was almost about to kowtow to him, and wanted to ask him to change his form of address. But looking at those bloodshot eyes, he sighed silently and gave up.

If he hadn't happened to appear and hadn't been so kind and selfless, the entire village would have faced a near-certain death even if they had tried to escape.

This is the life of the vast majority of ordinary people in Han areas today.

Of course, he has another thing on his mind now.

After witnessing the world's misery and the rampant monsters, Zhou You finally decided to first practice the Bai family's methods given to him by Old Man Li—after all, no matter how much the Five Deficiencies and Three Lacks were harmful, that was a matter for later; if he lost his life now, why would he care about such things?

But another problem arises.

—The old man only mentioned one shortcoming in his method, while the other was never even mentioned.

No, that statement isn't quite right either. Those two unreliable masters did mention it briefly, but the problem is, who could have predicted it?
All these low-level methods require constant exorcism to maintain their base! If they don't exorcise for a while, it will also lead to erosion!

This is outrageous!

Zhou You finally understood why his master, who was such a lazy person, was so diligent in exorcising evil spirits—it wasn't because he had a noble heart or hated evil, but because he simply had no other choice!
Seeing that Uncle Chen was still waiting for him expectantly, Zhou You could only put those thoughts aside for the time being and continue answering.

"It's still early. Please step forward if you were born in the years of Jia, Bing, Wu, Geng, or Ren."

In this world, illiteracy is widespread. Knowing a few dozen characters is enough to be considered civilized, but people still remember the year they were born. Soon, four of them emerged from the village.

But Zhou You still frowned.

The quantity is insufficient.

He hadn't been in the White Gate for long, and the method to deal with this disturbance was the 'Welcoming Joy Method'. Other materials could be made up with whatever was available, such as replacing straw paper with white paper, or even drawing talismans on tree bark. However, the five people born in the Yang year were truly indispensable.

But just then, one of the merchants who had been watching the commotion stepped forward.

And this was the middle-aged man who was leading the group.

He looked at Zhou You, clasped his hands in a fist salute, and then smiled.

"I was born in a Yang year, and also in a Yang month and at a Yang hour. I wonder if I could fill this vacancy for you, sir?"

(End of this chapter)