Top Scholar

Chapter 160 The Intestines

Although couplets generally follow the rule of "rising tone at the beginning and falling tone at the end," Su Youcai had already taught Su Lu that tones are not absolute. When composing poems and couplets on the spot, one should prioritize the meaning and not put the cart before the horse or be bound by strict rules.

Especially when the other side is provoking and the two sides are at loggerheads, ending with a flat tone is not only permissible, but also a powerful weapon for counterattack!

Therefore, although "poor household" rhymes better with "fire tune", the double level tone ending is weak and feeble. So Su Lu decisively changed it to "yellow gate tune", forming a tonal confrontation of "you use oblique tone to suppress me, I use oblique tone to stab you", making the whole dialogue like swords clashing, sparks flying!

"Hahaha, Lao Liu is done for, isn't he?!" The brothers, never ones to miss a good show, started mocking their little brother.

"Who said that? Let's try again!" Zhu Ziming's face flushed red as he pointed at Su Lu.
"A pheasant among the pines, under the thatched eaves, pecks at the last remaining snowflakes—"

"A sparrow in a cage, in a painted hall, sings of a false phoenix and a false dragon!" Su Lu laughed lightly, there was no need to criticize him with oblique tones anymore.

"These unruly mountain birds dare to vie for branches in a painting?" Zhu Ziming sneered, mocking Su Lu for acting so arrogantly in a wealthy and powerful household.

"A caged bird is locked, making it hard to find its way back to its nest from beyond the clouds!" Su Lu's tone grew increasingly calm. He mocked Zhu Ziming, saying he was only a bully within his own household and nothing outside of it.

"How could a wild pheasant know that a golden goblet warms wine and melts a thousand snowflakes—" Zhu Ziming said proudly. My family is just that powerful, so what?

"How can a caged bird understand fishing on the river by tapping the ice with a bamboo cane?" Su Lu remained calm and composed, his perspective far broader than Zhu Ziming's.

"What a wonderful 'fishing on the river with a bamboo cane on the ice'!" Zhu Zigong and the others exclaimed in admiration, "'Using heaven and earth as a dwelling and rivers as a vessel'—the difference in quality is immediately apparent!"

"Alright, Ziming, that's enough. Any more and you'll just be humiliating yourself." Even the older brother, who loved watching the drama unfold, couldn't stand it anymore.

There's no need to say "go further" at all. This kid is already a complete clown...

"You're all just watching this joke!" Zhu Ziming was so angry that tears streamed down his face, but he still managed to speak in a high-pitched voice.

"Hey, Ziming?" Zhu Zihe, who had just returned from constipation, asked curiously, "Why are you speaking with your tongue tucked in?"

"You're all bullying me! I'm going to find my sister..." Zhu Ziming finally couldn't take it anymore and fled amidst the laughter.

"What?" Zhu Zihe asked Su Lu with a questioning look on his face, "Did he provoke you?"

"Wasn't it you who gave him the opportunity?" Su Lu rolled her eyes at him. Having spent a lot of time with Zhu Zihe, Su Lu had come to understand his 'insidious' nature. This kid was deliberately trying to use her to teach his disrespectful younger brother a lesson.

"Haha, Hongzhi figured it out?" Zhu Zigong and the others laughed loudly.

"Because this isn't the first time he's used the 'urinate' excuse at a crucial moment," Su Lu laughed.

“Sure enough, the same trick can’t be used twice.” Zhu Zihe admitted, explaining, “Ziming heard that Third Uncle was going to take on disciples, and he also wanted to learn the Book of Rites from him, but Third Uncle refused. Of course, he doesn’t like us.”

“Hongzhi, you must not be careless. My third uncle is very picky. He always says that only people with great perseverance and ability can study the Book of Rites.” Zhu Zigong sighed and said, “Oh right, you also need to have a good physique. Because of my poor health, my third uncle made me switch to studying the Book of Poetry.”

“You’re doing well. Back then, when we asked him which meridian to treat, he simply said, ‘It’s incurable…’” his brothers said with a wry smile.

"Hongzhi, I hope you can meet your third uncle's approval," Zhu Zigeng said to Su Lu.

"Even if you don't make it, it doesn't matter. You've already caught our eye," said Zhu Zijing, the third brother, with a chuckle. "Later, your brothers will take you all over Luzhou!"

As everyone was talking, Zhu Ziming, who had just run away, returned.

"What's wrong, Ziming? Haven't you had enough fun yet?" His brothers asked with a smile when they saw that he looked like he was ready to play again.

“I have another absolute answer. If you can match it, I’ll admit you’re really amazing!” Zhu Ziming looked at Su Lu provocatively and, without waiting for his reply, slapped a Xue Tao paper in front of him.

All the people saw was a line of beautiful regular script on the paper. The strokes were graceful, like a beautiful woman with her eyebrows lowered and flowers in her hair, but the horizontal and vertical strokes concealed strength.

Let's look at the first line of the couplet:

'White Pagoda Street, Yellow Blacksmith, glowing the red-hot furnace, burning black charcoal, emitting blue smoke, flashing blue light, quenching purple iron, sitting north facing south, forging east and west.'

"Hiss..." The Zhu brothers couldn't help but gasp. "This is way too difficult!"

"White, yellow, red, black, cyan, blue, and purple—the seven colors interlock in a vivid depiction of a bustling marketplace." Zhu Zigeng praised, "Truly an ingenious idea!"

"It ends with the four directions, and 'east and west' is a double entendre. It's really difficult!" Zhu Zijing said.

Su Lu saw that they were all deep in thought, seemingly wanting to take the initiative and come up with the first line of the couplet.

He was happy to avoid thinking too much and whispered to Zhu Zihe, "Do you also have a Su Xiaomei in your family?"

"You mean my sister? She's read a few books and can write lyrics and compose music." Zhu Zihe laughed, "But this doesn't look like her work, otherwise my buddy wouldn't be so enthusiastic."

"I see." Su Lu nodded.

"Aren't you curious who that person is?" Zhu Zihe asked with a smile. "Even if you told me, I wouldn't know her," Su Lu replied with a laugh. He didn't know a single woman in the entire city of Luzhou.

"You've definitely heard of them," Zhu Zihe couldn't help but boast, "Think about it, who's having a guest at my house today?"

"Huang Bingxian?" Su Lu suddenly realized, "His famous young lady?"

“I was just guessing, but judging from their reactions, I can’t be wrong,” Zhu Zihe said.

"..." Su Lu glanced at Zhu Zigeng, who was already a father of four, and wondered why this guy was so enthusiastic.
The two chatted and ate snacks. After a short while, the elder brothers all gave up and said to Su Lu with smiles, "This was a challenge for you, why are we bothering with this?"

"Heh heh! He can't either!" Zhu Ziming smirked again, hands on his hips, and said, "He's only good at bullying kids!"

"Haha! What's so difficult about that?" Su Lu laughed as he stood up, glanced at him, and said to Zhu Ziming, "Little Liu, bring me pen and ink!"

"You even ordered me around?" Zhu Ziming pursed his lips, but obediently ground the ink and handed Su Lu a small white cloud ink stick.

Then Su Lu took the brush and wrote a line of regular script next to the first line of the couplet. Unlike the woman's handwriting, his characters were strictly regulated, perfectly integrated, and possessed both strength and elegance, displaying the power of a thousand armies!
Everyone saw that the first line of the couplet on Xue Tao's paper was finally complete—

'White Pagoda Street, Yellow Blacksmith, glowing the red-hot furnace, burning black charcoal, emitting blue smoke, flashing blue light, quenching purple iron, sitting north facing south, forging east and west.'

'Thinking of the Retreat Pavilion, a patriot concerned with his country, he endured joyous rains, raging waves, and sorrowful tides, sighing at the startling clouds, breaking through fear, and reading history through winter and summer.'

"Good, good, good!" As soon as Su Lu stopped writing, the Zhu brothers kept praising him.

“Using the seven emotions of joy, anger, sorrow, grief, fear, and shock to correspond to the seven colors of white, yellow, red, black, cyan, blue, and purple. Using winter, summer, spring, and autumn to correspond to north, south, east, and west!” Zhu Zigeng exclaimed in admiration, “What’s even more remarkable is that ‘spring and autumn’ also has a double meaning! Hongzhi is truly brilliant!”

“The cleverness in the words is nothing more than a word game; no matter how ingenious it is, it cannot be considered brilliant.” Zhu Zigong also shook his head and said, “The key is that the second line, with just a few strokes, outlines a scholar who is concerned about the country and its people and whose ambitions are not fulfilled, perfectly echoing the blacksmith in the marketplace.”

Even the most taciturn second brother, Zhu Zixian, exclaimed with admiration: "The most wonderful part is the parallelism between 'tempering iron' and 'breaking through fear.' The former is the tempering of iron, and the latter is the tempering of the soul—the blacksmith forges iron in fire and hammer, and the scholar forges his soul in emotion and thought. It is truly a match made in heaven!"

Su Lu was embarrassed by their constant praise. This was actually an impromptu performance after years of training with his partner; he hadn't thought about it at all.

But after they explained it, he realized it was indeed true. Could this be what they mean by 'a masterpiece is born of nature, and a stroke of genius comes by chance'?
Zhu Zihe looked smugly at the dumbfounded Zhu Ziming, thinking to himself, "You little brat, you've finally tasted the pain I suffer every month, haven't you?"

He then laughed and said, "Ziming, are you finally convinced now?"

"I admit defeat." Zhu Ziming finally lowered his 'noble' head and bowed deeply to Su Lu, saying, "I admit, you are a fine steed! I am a nag, and I will give way to you from now on."

"No, no, it's not that bad..." Su Lu was speechless. Why did the Zhu family like to describe people with four legs so much?

"Haha, Ziming, how can you back down like this? You should consult my brother Yi more often in the future." Zhu Zihe almost choked on his own words.

Su Lu glanced at him. Who gave you permission to be promoted to a higher generation without authorization?
At this moment, a servant came in to report: "Huang Bingxian is going back."

"Ah, really? Sister Huang E is still waiting for the second line." Zhu Ziming quickly grabbed the Xue Tao paper and rushed out of the study, not knowing if he could still make it in time...

“Let’s go over there too. My third uncle will be in a better mood if he sees you waiting at the door when he comes back from seeing off his guests,” Zhu Zihe said to Su Lu with a smile.

“Alright.” Su Lu readily agreed and stood up. He thought to himself, “I’m going to acknowledge Zhu Zhang as my master, not Zhu Yuanzhang? Why is Zhu Zihe, who is fearless and audacious, filled with such reverence for his third uncle?”

"We'll be waiting for you to come back for dinner." The older brothers laughed and said, "Hongzhi, you must come back! We haven't had enough time to get close to you yet."

“I’ll try my best…” Su Lu replied with a smile.

"After seeing Third Uncle, his word no longer matters, so you shouldn't have too high hopes." Zhu Zihe shook his head, led Su Lu out of the study, past a withered lotus pond with dew on bare branches, and arrived at a courtyard shaded by green bamboo.

The two saw a large group of guards standing at the gate of the courtyard from afar, and even Zhu Ziming was questioned when he passed by...

Even more outrageous, most of the guards had their heads adorned with eagle-beak-like hero buns.

Su Lu clicked his tongue in amazement and said, "The Military Commissioner has such a grand entourage? Why are there so many guards?"

"Perhaps it was flattery from the Pacification Commissioner," Zhu Zihe said uncertainly.

At this moment, the warrior Luo Luo let Zhu Ziming into the cordon. Su Lu saw a total of three sedan chairs, one of which was a tin-roofed blue-clothed sedan chair, which was obviously the one Huang Bingxian rode in.

Two sedan chairs followed behind. Zhu Ziming approached the middle one. The curtain was lifted, and a young girl smiled and said a few words to him. She then accepted the Xue Tao letter paper that Zhu Ziming handed her, and the sedan chair drove away.

"That must be the legendary Huang E, but it's a pity we only caught a glimpse of her and didn't get a clear look at her." Zhu Zihe craned his neck and said regretfully, "Qiji, did you see her clearly?"

"Why would I look at her?" Su Lu said speechlessly. He was only worried about how to get past Zhu Zhang.

P.S. All the couplets are original... except for the last one, which took at least two hours to come up with the matching line... The last chapter hasn't been checked yet.

(End of this chapter)