I Alone Am Immortal: My Rebirth and Leisurely Cultivation

Chapter 148 Calling a deer a horse
After math class, there is a flag-raising ceremony during the long break.

Biology class after the flag-raising ceremony.

Because most of the class was occupied by the flag-raising ceremony, biology teacher Li Junlong only handed out answer sheets and didn't have time to explain the questions.

Li Yan didn't get a perfect score, but he still came in first place.

Next, we arrived at the homeroom teacher's Chinese class.

Li Yan didn't get a perfect score this time either, and it would be difficult for him to get one.

While both are language subjects, English only requires filling in the correct answers, doing a good job of translation, using a few grammatical rules and some advanced vocabulary in the essay, and getting a perfect score is not difficult.

But Chinese is different. Apart from ensuring that he gets full marks in reciting poems, Li Yan cannot guarantee anything else.

Chinese language and literature is, to some extent, quite mysterious.

Li Ping stood on the podium and began distributing the test papers.

"Li Yan, 138, first in class, first in grade."

"Yu Qingya, 136, second in class, second in grade."

"Mei Mengqian, 135, third in class, third in grade."

Li Ping distributed the test papers in such a simple and brutal way that he just read out the rankings, and the students who ranked lower felt more pressure.

After distributing the answer sheets, Li Ping picked up the exam papers from the first row of students and began to explain:

"Turn your exam papers to the essay section!"

Then came the sound of a large sheet of paper being flipped through.

"This time, write an essay on living poetically!" Li Ping read the essay title aloud, his face already falling.

"Of the forty students in the class, more than twenty wrote lyrical essays that contained nothing of substance; only 38 wrote them. Everyone, stand up!"

Chen Xiyuan stood up next to Li Ping, his expression shifting between anger and uncertainty.

"There were some minor traps in this question, but you can avoid them by carefully reading and understanding the question!"

"Living poetically is a verb. I'm asking you to write about your life and analyze how to find poetry in life, not to have you write empty words about what poetry is!"

For the entire class period, Li Ping talked about composition, and even took Mei Mengqian's answer sheet and read her composition aloud.

She got the highest score in the essay section.

This made my little deskmate a bit shy.

Li Yan was initially a little bored, but when Li Ping read his classmate's essay aloud, he was no longer bored.

Li Ping would read a sentence, and then he would quietly read a sentence to Mei Mengqian, followed by his comment.

So much so that Mei Mengqian was initially just embarrassed, but gradually a blush, like ivy, slowly crept up her fair cheeks.

"Poetry isn't just found in distant places; it can also be found in the ordinary moments of life, with glimmers of light within our reach. Ah, that's wonderful," Li Yan continued.

My little classmate lowered her head deeply, her long black hair covering her face.

Finally, unable to hold back any longer, she suddenly reached out a hand, grabbed the soft flesh of Li Yan's waist, and twisted it.

"You are bad!"

"Really? Then I'll continue reading."

"No."

Mei Mengqian quickly pulled him back. After all, Li Ping was a teacher, so he could just read it.

But if Li Yan reads it, it will be different; at least she will feel differently.

"No means yes, yes means no. Do you want it or not?"

"want."

"Very good, you want it."

"??!"

Mei Mengqian wanted to transform into Jiang Yingzhu and give this guy a good beating.

Yu Qingya, sitting in the front row, leaned against the table behind her, shaking her head as she listened.

Poor Mengmeng, she was completely fooled.

Yu Qingya's eyes darted around, and she passed a note to Mei Mengqian.

(Mengmeng, Li Ping has already finished reading the composition, but he's still talking about it.)
Upon seeing the contents of the note, Mei Mengqian realized this and immediately ignored Li Yan.

I replied to a message.

(Thank you, Qingya. Li Yan is awful.)
She had thought that Yu Qingya would join her in criticizing Li Yan, but she didn't.

(I have a way to help you fight back), Yu Qingya replied.

(What method?)

Mei Mengqian eagerly finished writing down the question, quickly returned the note, and wanted to get a solution as soon as possible.

Less than a minute later, the note was handed back to me.

She looked up, and suddenly her pupils dilated.

(Dating him, spending his money, getting married, taking a share of his assets, having his children—it'll drive him crazy!)

Mei Mengqian's pupils suddenly contracted, and a layer of sunset glow rippled across her fair and delicate face. A thin mist seemed to be swirling between her brows and eyes, expressing both shyness and reproach, joy and anger.

She squeezed out two words through gritted teeth and reached out to poke the desk in front of her.

"Refined! Elegant!"

"Hehe!" Yu Qingya immediately leaned forward, turned her head to look at Mei Mengqian with great interest, and thoroughly enjoyed Mei Mengqian's shy appearance.

'Teasing Mengmeng is so much fun.'

Over here, Li Yan glanced at Mei Mengqian as if casually, then suddenly exclaimed in surprise:
"What are you writing in your hand? Whose note is this?"

"Nobody's!" Mei Mengqian exclaimed in surprise. She grabbed the note tightly, and it turned into a ball in her hand. She then threw it into the trash bag hanging next to the table.

Seemingly uneasy about tossing the paper into the trash bag hanging between them, she withdrew her hand and put the crumpled paper in her pocket.

"Are you being so wary of me because you're insulting me?"

As Li Yan spoke, he made a gesture as if to search her pockets, but Mei Mengqian quickly raised her other hand and pressed his hand down.

Fingers are connected to the heart; the moment their hands touched, Mei Mengqian felt her heart skip a beat.

So this is what boys' hands look like—so big and hard!

Will he think I'm doing this on purpose, trying to touch him a little longer? Would that be inappropriate?

Mei Mengqian had 3,600 thoughts popping into her mind, so many that she couldn't even distinguish them.

It wasn't until they realized that their hands had been touching for a while, and that Li Yan was even pinching his own fingers, that they realized they hadn't.

Mei Mengqian's head immediately turned as red as a small tomato, and it seemed as if steam was coming out of her ears.

"rogue!"

She quickly withdrew her hand, lay on the table, turned her head away, ignored him, and pretended to listen to the teacher's lecture.

"What, let me play a little longer."

"What the hell are you talking about? These are my hands, are they something you can just let anyone play with?!" Mei Mengqian thought fiercely to herself, ignoring her.

Her mind was filled with the sensation of her hand being pinched and the feeling of her little hand being wrapped up; she couldn't hear anything else.

My mind was a jumble of thoughts, yet also completely blank.

Li Ping, the homeroom teacher who had been explaining essays in the second row and seemed to be selectively blind to them, raised an eyebrow slightly upon seeing this.

He glanced at Li Yan, then at Mei Mengqian, and thought about their grades.

So he returned the answer sheet to its rightful owner, saying:
"Okay, that's enough for the essay. Next, you'll see the classical Chinese translation."

Just as Li Ping finished speaking, the school bell rang, signaling the end of get out of class.

He paused, then put the test paper away.

"Alright, get out of class dismissed. We'll continue during evening self-study."

Lunch break time.

The classroom was suddenly filled with scattered sounds as everyone started to leave.

Li Yan glanced at his deskmate, Mei Mengqian, whose face was still slightly flushed, and stood up to make way for her.

No, it should be said that he hurriedly stopped Yu Qingya.

"Qingya, let's have lunch together."

"Okay, what about Li Yan?"

"I'll come too, and I'll invite Zhuzhu as well," Li Yan said with a smile.

"no problem."

Mei Mengqian stood to the side and pursed her lips, her attempt to sneak away had failed.

The three of them then went downstairs to meet Jiang Yingzhu.

Jiang Yingzhu and Yu Qingya were somewhat acquainted, so they nodded as a greeting, and immediately said:

"Hey, where are we going for lunch?"

“I don’t care,” Li Yan said.

"Why don't we go to the cafeteria? We won't have to wait."

Jiang Yingzhu nodded, "Okay, it's been a long time since I've eaten in the cafeteria, my meal card is practically rusty."

·······
Cafeteria
Many students eat lunch here, since the cafeteria is cheaper.

The group ate here because it was close by and they didn't have to wait, not because it was cheap.

After getting their food, the four of them found an empty table and sat down.

"Hmm!" Jiang Yingzhu took a bite of the stir-fried green beans and pork on the plate and immediately frowned.

"It's getting worse and worse. Did the cafeteria cooks use their feet to cook this?!"

"Stop eating, let's go outside," Yu Qingya suddenly said.

Li Yan looked at her and saw that she looked unwell and even felt nauseous.

His gaze shifted to her plate, and he immediately understood, then frowned slightly.

In the dish in front of her, there was a large, dead fly, right on top of everything.

"Holy crap, such a huge fly! These people in the cafeteria are really going too far!"

Jiang Yingzhu saw it too, and Mei Mengqian nodded in agreement.

"It's too unhygienic, let's eat out."

"No way!" Jiang Yingzhu slammed her hand on the table.

The stainless steel tabletop trembled, like the sound of war drums.

Li Yan glanced at her, knowing what she wanted to do, and saw no need to stop her.

Yu Qingya and Mei Mengqian, however, were somewhat puzzled.

"But these meals are clearly inedible."

"Of course you can't eat it."

Jiang Yingzhu nodded, her expression solemn.

"I mean, we can't just let this go! I want to see who did it. Putting flies in the food is no different from poisoning, and nobody cares!"

When school started, Jiang Yingzhu and Mei Mengqian were eating rice bowls in the cafeteria when Li Yan reminded them that there were insects in the food, which made them feel nauseous.

Although they didn't get infected at the time, they still felt uneasy.

She reported it back then, but she never expected it to get even more perverted now.

Jiang Yingzhu grabbed Yu Qingya's plate and said, "Let's go, let's get an explanation."

In a few quick steps, the four of them arrived at a certain window in the cafeteria, where the auntie serving the food looked at them with a puzzled expression.

"What's the matter with you?"

"Auntie, are these vegetables from your stall? Look what this is."

Jiang Yingzhu placed the plate on the table and pointed to the big fly on top.

"These are broad beans, pickled," the middle-aged woman argued without batting an eye.

"Don't block the way, the students behind you need to get their food."

However, the students behind them weren't blind; they very kindly gave up their seats to the students behind them.

"Broad beans, right? Okay!"

Jiang Yingzhu was so angry she laughed, and Li Yan also frowned.

He didn't like eating in the cafeteria in his previous life and had never experienced anything like this.

The first time I heard of such an absurd case of calling a deer a horse was at a certain school, specifically the "Rat Duck Neck" incident.

Mei Mengqian and Yu Qingya looked even uglier and wanted to argue with the older woman, but she clearly had a defiant attitude.

They're not the kind of girls who can handle this.

Jiang Yingzhu didn't argue with the older woman, and simply said, "You wait."

Then they took the plate and left.

The middle-aged woman chuckled, picked her nose, and casually flicked a booger into one of the vegetable bowls in front of her.

The new student who came to get food looked on with a twitch of his eyebrows.

"Auntie, I don't want it anymore."

"Don't want it? You've already swiped your card!"

Jiang Yingzhu scanned the cafeteria and quickly found her target.

Holding his tray, he sat down in front of the vice principal.

(End of this chapter)