My older brother is Gao Huan.

Chapter 578 Gao's Parenting Methods

Children's emotions come and go quickly.

After sobbing for a while, Gao Ze looked up at Gao Yu with a pitiful expression, tried to stop crying, wiped his face, and lowered his head with a sense of self-reproach.

“Father…am I useless and cowardly, making you and Mother disappointed?”

Gao Yu looked down at him and asked in return, "Useless? Cowardly? Do you mean crying?"

"Um……"

"So, in your eyes, what kind of person is your father?"

Instead of answering Gao Ze directly, Gao Yu raised another question.

“My father is undoubtedly a great hero, the bravest man of our time. My mother, uncles, Teacher Wen… all speak highly of him. I want to become like my father…”

Gao Yu chuckled lightly, "What if Father told you that someone like Father has also cried? And cried in front of many soldiers, not secretly in front of me like you do."

"Really...really?"

Gao Ze looked up in disbelief; Gao Yu's words had a certain impact on him.

After all, he had never heard anyone say that Gao Yu was 'weak'.

Gao Yu chuckled. He wasn't the emperor yet, so naturally he wouldn't compile a "Veritable Records of the Holy Ancestor" like Kang Youwei did, having people record how many wild animals he shot and what he did each day so that future generations could memorize it all the time.

He was even bestowed the title of First Baturu of the Qing Dynasty by Emperor Qianlong.

“When Father led his army north to conquer the Rouran, although he ultimately won a great victory, he lost many soldiers of the Xuanjia Army. Father wept because he was weeping for the deaths of these soldiers.”

Gao Yu patiently explained, "Aze, you need to understand that as long as you are a strong person, crying does not mean you are weak and incompetent."

Gao Ze nodded as if he understood, but still pouted with a hint of self-reproach, "But I don't want to disappoint Mother..."

“Aze, you also need to understand your mother. Your mother can completely indulge you and spoil you. It’s easy to spoil someone unconditionally, but your mother would rather risk being disliked by you to correct you. That’s exactly how she shows her love for you. Although she may be too harsh, there’s nothing she can do.”

“You are my eldest son. Given your position, both your mother and others around you will have high expectations of you, which you cannot escape.”

"But what your father wants to tell you is... don't force yourself to meet other people's expectations, understand? Everyone in this world is a unique being. You are yourself. You cannot become me, nor do you need to become me."

“You will also experience joy, anger, sorrow and happiness. What your father hopes is that you can laugh when you are happy, and cry when you feel wronged or sad. Don’t suppress your emotions in your heart.”

The Gao family has too many vivid examples.

Gao Cheng, who was spoiled from a young age, developed an arrogant personality and did not know how to respect others. Despite his great skills, he ultimately died because of his own arrogance. His death could have been avoided, and perhaps the fate of Northern Qi would have been different.

What about Gao Yang?
Growing up in an environment where he was neglected, suppressed, and denied recognition from a young age, he developed a distorted personality, craving his parents' approval and having an extreme desire for success.

Gao Yang's 'madness' was more like the result of suppressing too many emotions in his heart, and having no other way to vent them, he could only choose to feign madness and kill, using killing to numb himself.

after all……

Unlike Gao Cheng, Gao Yang did not have a pure and upright lineage. As an emperor who "obtained the throne illegitimately" and lacked prestige, he could not vent his grievances by crying, no matter how much he suffered, because such a "cowardly act" would only further damage his personal prestige.

In Gao Yu's opinion, it would be better for an emperor to be more carefree. He is a person who already holds great power, so why should he live in the image that others have created for him?

Why not learn from Liu Bang, the founder of the Han Dynasty?
He only hoped that Gao Ze could have a good childhood and grow up in a healthy environment. With the teaching staff that Gao Yu provided for him, even if Gao Ze had no talent, he would be enough to be a ruler who could maintain the status quo.

“Aze, your father made a promise to you that if you ever feel wronged, you should come and talk to your father.”

"it is good!"

Gao Ze then smiled, fiddling with his little hands and saying expectantly, "I want Father to play with me for a while, then I'll go find Teacher Wen to study."

"no problem!"

Gao Yu laughed loudly and lifted him over his head, letting him sit on his shoulders.

Yang Changchu hadn't actually gone far. She secretly hid in the shadows, watching Gao Ze's ecstatic joy, her heart filled with mixed emotions.

Gao Yu did indeed play with Gao Ze for a while before having someone take Gao Ze to find Wen Zisheng. He also noticed Yang Changchu's presence.

After all, he was someone who had fought on the battlefield for many years, so he still had this keen sense of perception.

Seeing Gao Yu approaching, Yang Changchu looked guilty. "Husband... am I not a good mother?"

"No way. It's only natural to want one's son to succeed. And Aze's position is different from that of ordinary children."

He comforted the younger one.

Now we also need to comfort the older ones.

“Chang Chu, Aze is already quite old, so he understands many things. He just doesn’t know how to express them. You can’t be too harsh on him.”

“I know, but I just…”

"You listen to me."

Gao Yu pulled her into his arms and said softly, "Aze is at the age when he is most playful. We can't let him play all the time, but we also can't suppress his childhood nature too much."

"Even if you force him to study every day, what good is it if he can read and write? Aren't there countless examples of children who are promising but not necessarily successful as adults?"

Yang Changchu understood.

If it were someone else, she might think that Gao Yu's lack of high expectations and demands for Gao Ze might mean that Gao Yu had already given up on Gao Ze.

He will choose another son as his successor in the future.

But she knew very well that Gao Yu didn't think that way.

Because Gao Yu treated all his children in the same way.

“Just like weightlifting, you can’t expect Aze to lift something beyond his ability. Even if he does lift it by force, it will hurt his body. I understand what happened today… You owe Aze an apology. He has already tried so hard, but you even took away his only rest time.”

"What should I do, my husband..."

“Go apologize to Aze calmly. I’ve already talked to him about it.”

"Husband..."

Yang Changchu's eyes were blurry with tears, "So many national affairs are weighing on my husband's shoulders..."

"Alright, we're husband and wife, why be so formal? Go talk to Aze properly, he'll understand. And don't be too harsh on him in the future."

People, especially children.

We shouldn't be too harsh, but we also shouldn't be too lenient.

That degree is very difficult to control.

Yang Changchu was too harsh before, and now he needs to be a little more lenient.

"Ah."

Yang Changchu nodded.

"You and Aze stay in Qingzhou until next spring before returning to Yecheng. After I leave, take good care of yourself and Aze as well."

"My husband, please rest assured, I will certainly not disappoint you."

Cultivate oneself, regulate one's family, govern the state, and bring peace to the world.

The more experiences Gao Yu had, the more he appreciated the wisdom of the ancients, who had actually summarized many of life's truths.

If the house is a mess of bits and pieces.

How then can one govern the country and bring peace to the world?

(End of this chapter)