EVA: Shinji Ikari Returns from Tiga

Chapter 117 How could I possibly allow you to abandon Asuka!

"M-Ri...Xiang...?"

The overwhelmingly powerful right hand, the terrifying aura like that of a demon... Shinji Ikari truly found it hard to believe that such an aura could emanate from a face that looked exactly like his own...

"Who...who is that!?"

And why... call out a name you don't recognize?
"Why—why is Asuka not here in this world?"

"So!! Who is that... Ahh! I don't know! I don't recognize them!! Things that cause me pain... people that cause me pain... I wish none of them existed!!"

Accompanied by Shinji Ikari's hysterical screams and rejection, a powerful resistance separated Shinji from him...

"This is AT's position...!"

Looking at the wall of his heart—literally separating him from himself and from his inner resolve and cowardice—Shinji Ikari clenched his teeth and fists in anger.

AT stance is a wall of the heart... Even the same person... cannot understand the wall of isolation within themselves...

Selflessness and selfishness, the greater good and the lesser good, dedication and baseness, courage and cowardice... These are clearly diametrically opposed qualities, yet they can be perfectly reflected in the same person.

This is Shinji Ikari's current state... Shinji Ikari's essence is not that of a born savior... His resolve and will have slowly grown through countless trials and tribulations...

Therefore, deep down... there are still whispers like "Why me?" and "It would be better if it weren't me"... but the energy difference between them and Shinji Ikari is so great that they can't be expressed emotionally at all...

The Tenth Apostle, however, delved into the deepest recesses of the soul and unearthed these things—

"Asuka... I don't know her! I don't know her! How scary...! She might curse at me for no reason! She might compete with me for no reason! She might strangle me for no reason... I don't know! I don't know!!"

Hearing Shinji Ikari's howling, which sounded like a defeated dog, Shinji's anger intensified!
Cowardice is understandable—after all, what's lacking is the experience of honing one's skills…

Escaping is understandable—after all, what's lacking is the awareness to move forward…

Fear is understandable—after all, what's lacking is the courage to fight back…

But... it's incomprehensible—it's simply incomprehensible and unacceptable...

The perfect, blissful world that I, in my unspoiled self, had created... was nowhere to be found—the blonde girl!

This... is the greatest betrayal of that child who has no home left!
I can still vaguely remember…

The reason I found myself in this murky Red Sea was because I was influenced by the psychological interference of the Tenth Angel, which led me to unearth the most primal Shinji Ikari from the deepest part of my heart, the one that was unadorned and buried at the very bottom.

But… Unit-02, Asuka… she was interfered with by the Tenth Angel along with me… If she saw all of this…

I saw that in the world projected from the mind of "Shinji Ikari"... she didn't exist in any corner...

Asuka...how painful and sorrowful!
so…………

"Is that so... Well then, that's fine."

A voice devoid of mercy and pity... brought a suffocating sound of rupture to Shinji Ikari.

With both hands touching the center of the absolute domain... as the inner will surged, this inviolable wall of the heart... shattered in response!
This is natural; misunderstandings born from the gap between people's hearts can naturally be burned away by the brilliance that ignites from the same soul.

This is a trial, a trial for every human being.

Overcome fear with inner courage, and stop escaping with inner awareness... It is precisely because of this that we can compose a hymn to humanity.

"……Why!!"

Seeing the barriers in front of him crumble layer by layer...

Shinji Ikari let out a wail.

"Why does it have to be like this...! This world! Isn't it good enough! This life...! Isn't it good enough! No...! I don't want to! I don't want to go back! I don't want to go back there...! All the burdens are on my shoulders... All the pain is borne by me..."

—A repulsive voice. "This world…is the world we've been searching for! Dad! Mom…! They're all here…! Even if we go back over there, we won't come back! Only in this world…can we live with Dad, Mom, and Rei…This is the world we should have chosen…isn't it!"

—An annoying sound.

"Asuka...Asuka...! Is that girl named Asuka really that important?!"

—The nauseating sound…and the sound of the absolute territory being completely torn apart, sank forever into the sea.

"...What a boring question."

Shinji Ikari's hand, a hand imbued with resolve and will, mercilessly... gripped "Shinji Ikari's" throat as if it were about to kill him.

"How long...must we fight...before we can stop...?"

Tears streamed down Shinji Ikari's face, dripping onto his arm and causing a burning sting.

The intense pain is exactly the same as with LCL solutions...

So that's how it is... That pain reflects Shinji Ikari's heart...

This is ridiculous. Can this level of suffering be stopped?
"A foolish question. Of course, I'll fight to the death—no, even in death... In the next cycle, I will fight to make everyone happy... until I reach the HAPPY END of complete victory! No other endings allowed! This is the path Shinji Ikari has chosen."

"Cough, cough... cough... cough!"

Shinji Ikari seemed to want to say something... but it was choked by those hands that were as strong as iron clamps, and he could no longer utter a single syllable.

"By the way, it's not as important as Asuka... If you chose Rei in your heart here, I would still destroy you... destroy this world you chose. From the very beginning of this story, Shinji Ikari was not allowed to abandon... Rei or Asuka! Neither of them was allowed to be abandoned!!"

Every word was an expression of righteous indignation, every sentence a roar of the soul... as if the force was trying to tear apart the baseness deep within her heart along with this false ending... pressing down on that slender neck!
"So...how could I possibly allow you to abandon Asuka! You only care about your own happiness?!"

Click.

Accompanied by the sound of a neck bone breaking—the world was distorted.

Having personally shattered the lingering cowardice deep within his heart... Shinji Ikari pursed his lips in boredom and continued forward... Just as he took his first step!

"…………!"

Suddenly… I realized something.

I realized... in this false world... someone with a real presence was standing right behind me.

Ah...right...

Those enveloped by the light of the Tenth Angel... were only himself and Asuka...

There's also Unit-01 and Unit-02.

"...Ah, I'm sorry...your son has chosen to fight to the death. Ah...will you support me...Mom..."

No need to turn around, no need to check who's behind you...

There's no need to ask or answer anything...

All Shinji Ikari needs to do is move forward, without hesitation... without any doubt... towards the future.

Behind him—Yui Ikari…with a loving smile…watched Shinji Ikari disappear into the depths of the crimson sea…

"Go...Shinji."