My avatar is becoming the final boss

Chapter 204 "Don't die, you mustn't die, you absolutely cannot die" (Seeking monthly votes)
It was already quite dark, and the number of people in the amusement park had decreased significantly.

Xia Pingzhou stood in the bustling crowd, raised his head, and silently gazed up at the Ferris wheel in the night sky.

In the brightly lit carriage, a girl in an ochre kimono sat alone by the window, gazing at the city with empty eyes.

He couldn't help but marvel at how easy it was to find Origami Ayase, since she was the only one in the entire amusement park who would sit alone on the Ferris wheel, lost in thought.

From a distance, most of the people in the other carriages were in pairs, so she could be spotted at a glance.

Who would come to an amusement park alone? Everyone comes with family and friends so they don't look so disheveled.

But she didn't understand this kind of logic. Growing up in that kind of family, she probably had never been to an amusement park before, not even once...

Therefore, she didn't care or understand how others would see her, and felt that it wasn't strange for her to ride a Ferris wheel alone.

Looking back, Xia Pingzhou suddenly realized that he must have been the first person to take her on the Ferris wheel. When she was unhappy, she came here alone and sat in the Ferris wheel all alone. Was she thinking about him all the time?
His thoughts were racing. Amidst the clanging and clattering sounds, the giant Ferris wheel slowly turned, and the carriage carrying the girl in the kimono had reached the dome.

From Xia Pingzhou's perspective, she was no longer visible.

Tourists chatted and laughed as they passed by, drawing Xia Pingzhou's attention back to him.

He turned his gaze away from the Ferris wheel, looked around, and then walked toward the Ferris wheel operator.

Xia Pingzhou thought for a moment, then looked up and asked him in English, "How long has that girl in the kimono been here?"

The administrator had a typical British appearance, with flaxen hair neatly parted in a side part, and a crisp, starched white shirt peeking out from the collar of his wool uniform.

He turned his head, looked Xia Pingzhou up and down with curiosity, and then whispered, "That girl in the kimono, she's been sitting on the Ferris wheel here all day."

Xia Pingzhou was taken aback.

"You sat there all day?" he asked suspiciously.

"Yes, she didn't even eat all day long. After taking one ride, she would get off and queue up again, standing in the crowd with her head down, lost in thought. I have no idea what she was thinking."

At this point, the administrator shook his head and sighed, "She's probably heartbroken. I occasionally see young girls who are heartbroken doing this."

Xia Pingzhou remained silent for a moment.

He could imagine how quiet she must have been sitting in the Ferris wheel, probably not saying a word all day, just staring blankly out the window.

She boarded the Ferris wheel in a daze, then boarded it in a daze, and then stood in the crowd in a daze, queuing up. All around her were couples, but she was alone the whole time, from day to sunset, until the scenery in her eyes slowly darkened and the setting sun took away all its light.

The administrator, observing Xia Pingzhou's expression, seemed to have discerned something, and then, with exaggerated enthusiasm, added fuel to the fire:

"Hey foreign guy, you're not her ex-boyfriend, are you?"

"No, we're just friends."

"In Britain, we value gentlemanly conduct; we can't let a girl be left alone to shed tears."

Xia Pingzhou ignored him, thinking to himself, "I know what kind of people you British are, don't try to fool me with your gentlemanly spirit."

He found a public bench nearby, sat down, leaned back against the seat, and looked up at the swaying carriage, waiting for the Ferris wheel to land.

Shortly after, the Ferris wheel returned to the ground, the conductor opened the door of the carriage, and the girl in pure white stepped down.

She looked up and around, thought for a moment, and then walked back into the queue.

Most people in the queue walked in groups, but she stood alone in the middle, dressed in foreign clothes, naturally attracting the attention of others. A child pointed at her and told his mother that she was so beautiful, like a doll.

The girl in the kimono didn't speak. Amidst the surrounding chatter and laughter, she was indeed as quiet as a plain white doll. She looked up at the boy who was pointing at her with his index finger and shouting, and when she came to her senses, she suddenly realized that someone was standing next to her.

She turned her head and looked expressionlessly at the person standing next to her, then froze in place.

Although Xia Pingzhou cut in line, no one criticized him. This wasn't a solo ride; the other guests assumed the two of them were already together, and the girl in the kimono was simply reserving a spot for them.

Origami Ayase tilted her head, staring blankly into Xia Pingzhou's gaze. She looked up and then down, as if the world had become clear and bright again.

Neither of them spoke, but they shuffled forward step by step until they finally finished queuing and boarded the Ferris wheel.

The administrator jogged over, closed the carriage door, peeked out the window with his head, and gave Xia Pingzhou a thumbs-up with great enthusiasm.

Xia Ping turned his head away, pretending not to see.

The Ferris wheel slowly started moving, the carriages making a clanging sound as it swayed and rose into the London night sky.

After a moment of silence, the kimono-clad girl sitting opposite suddenly broke the silence:

"You said you were looking for a girl with white hair."

"Correct."

"She is your family."

"Correct."

"She is very important, more important than anyone else."

"Yes."

“Yesterday in the underground bar, there was a child whose eyes looked a lot like yours.”

Xia Pingzhou was slightly taken aback: "Looks a lot like me?"

The girl in the kimono nodded: "Yes, I mistook him for you back then."

She paused for a moment: "It's like... you're looking at me with disgust and saying: 'Stay away from me.'"

"What are you thinking? But it's true that there's a white-haired girl next to him."

Xia Pingzhou lowered his gaze and continued, "But... that girl isn't the one I'm looking for."

Seeing that the kimono-clad girl sitting opposite him was silent, he looked away and gazed out the window.

Ji Minghuan thought to herself, "I can't exactly say that was me, can I? At that moment, I really hated you. Or rather, I hated everyone who might hurt Kong Youling."

Even knowing that you were worried about Xia Pingzhou at that time, feeling lost, helpless, and anxious, that's why you wanted to ask me where Xia Pingzhou was.

But actually, I don't care at all about Xia Pingzhou.

To me, he's just a worthless game character. In my eyes, nothing in the world is cheaper than him. Everything about him is fake, all made up out of thin air...

So what's the point of being good to him?

I am not Xia Pingzhou, I am Ji Minghuan, I am only Ji Minghuan, and I can only be Ji Minghuan.

Ji Minghuan only has Kong Youling by her side; whoever hurts her is my enemy.

So I really hated you back then...

I really... hate you so much, I wish I could kill you all.

If you were just a simple bad person, I could use you without restraint, and then throw you away like a rag without feeling guilty.

But you are not... you are just a complete, clueless idiot.

But what can I do? I'm just an ordinary person. Why should I be expected to take care of everyone's feelings?
If I killed the Ripper, you would be very sad... but what could I do? And who would teach me how to do it?

Xia Pingzhou lowered his eyes, a glimmer of light shimmering in his dark pupils. "Am I strange?" the girl in the kimono suddenly asked.

“People are strange sometimes,” Xia Pingzhou said softly. “Me too, I often don’t understand what I’m thinking.”

“I don’t understand…” she shook her head, “Why do I mistake him for you? I always feel a heaviness in my heart, like I can’t breathe, and everything I think about is so chaotic… Is this what ‘heartbreak’ is?”

Xia Pingzhou remained silent for a long while.

He thought to himself, "That makes sense. This idiot doesn't even know what sadness is. After all, growing up in that kind of environment only allows him to shut down his emotions. Later on, he probably doesn't even understand his own feelings anymore."

He said, "If you can't figure something out, ask others. You're so stupid, you'll spend half a day thinking about it by yourself, and even if you ride a Ferris wheel for another month, you still won't figure it out."

"Then...do you hate me?" she asked softly.

Are you afraid that I'll hate you?

Origami Ayase lowered her eyes, remained silent for a long while, and then nodded.

“I don’t hate you.” Xia Pingzhou shook his head. “Don’t worry. How come I never realized you were so stupid before… You can overthink things just because a strange little kid glanced at you. What would you do if I really said I hated you?”

The girl in the kimono shook her head. "I don't know."

Xia Pingzhou thought for a while, then changed his seat and sat down next to her.

He said, "So, you're an idiot."

The girl in the kimono opened her mouth, still wanting to rebuke him, but couldn't find the words to say.

It's like a robot that's loading a program but suddenly discovers a file is missing, causing it to short-circuit on the spot.

"The kitten... is panting."

Finally, all she could manage to utter was that familiar phrase.

"If you're unhappy in the future, just talk to someone. You're too naive, so you can't understand anything... How can someone who doesn't even understand their own feelings understand others?"

"But you fainted."

Don't you have anyone else?

"No."

"If Enma Rin heard that, she'd probably want to kill you."

How do you know her name?

"She just told me."

The girl in the kimono paused, then looked up, slightly puffing out her pale cheeks. This seemed to be the first time she had made an expression that resembled a coquettish gesture.

Xia Pingzhou was stunned for a moment, seemingly not expecting to see such an expression on Ayase Origami. At this moment, she was like a normal sixteen-year-old girl, not a doll with empty eyes.

Without realizing it, he raised his hand and grabbed her round cheeks.

"Who taught you to make those expressions?" he asked curiously.

"A child on the road."

"really."

“We’ve rebelled.” Ayase Origami looked down at his hand, then looked up to meet his gaze, letting him pinch her cheek.

"Even a cat would find it hard not to rebel if it knew its owner was an idiot."

"Hate me?"

"it's OK."

"Don't hate me."

"I won't hate you."

"Ah That's good."

Ayase Origami seemed finally at ease, lowering her eyes and leaning against his shoulder. The Ferris wheel swayed and rose towards its highest point under the night sky.

After getting off the Ferris wheel, the two strolled through the dimly lit amusement park.

“I want that,” Ayase Origami suddenly said, pointing to the cotton candy merchant in the distance.

To avoid being found by hackers, she didn't bring her phone when she went out, and the only stack of banknotes she had was spent when buying tickets.

"Do you like cotton candy?" Xia Pingzhou asked.

"Actually, I don't really like it...it's too sweet," she said.

"Then why should I buy it for you?"

The girl in the kimono shook her head, put her hands behind her back, and remained silent.

"Money," she said.

Xia Pingzhou took out a stack of banknotes from his pocket and gave them to her. This was the first time he had ever seen the young lady ask him for money.

Origami Ayase put the money in her kimono sleeve, walked over silently, and bought two bunches of cotton candy.

She handed one of the cotton candies to Xia Pingzhou, and the two sat on a public wooden bench, eating quietly and looking up at the crowds coming and going.

The carousel not far away swayed to cheerful music, emitting a shimmering halo that enveloped their faces.

"Origami Ayase".

Suddenly, she heard someone pronounce her name in Japanese. She was slightly startled, looked up from the cotton candy, turned her head, and stared unblinkingly at Xia Pingzhou with her dark eyes.

"Ayase Origami, don't die." Xia Pingzhou paused. "These are the words you said to me, and I'm returning them verbatim."

“The kitten is mimicking its owner’s voice,” she said.

"Oh, then I'll change it." Xia Pingzhou thought for a moment and then said, "Ayase Origami, don't die, you're not allowed to die, you can't die."

The girl in the kimono stared at him for a while, then nodded.

"Let's go back then, it's getting late."

"it is good."

"Don't stand outside alone in a daze next time."

"Then you're not allowed to drink alone."

"Ah."

　Asking for a monthly ticket.

　　
　
(End of this chapter)