Warhammer: Don't Call Me the God of All Machines

Chapter 783 Only Failures Count as Rebellions (End of Political Plot)

(The Terra coup was definitely not a small-time hawker incident; it's practically stated outright.)
(In the original story, during the time of apostasy, Gaugo van der Er also came to power through an armed coup.)

The slender Elfreda calmly took Guilliman's seat.

Her muscles, which were initially tense, gradually relaxed, allowing her to fully savor the glory of the moment.

Based on the Primarch's body proportions, the meticulously crafted seat was like an oversized bed for the Bishop; she could even lie down and take a nap.

However, she tried her best to straighten her posture, attempting to project the proper dignity and solemnity.

However, to the High Lords, this seemed more like a ridiculous monkey trying to disguise itself as a human.

One by one, the battle nuns stood in the corners of the spacious conference hall, gazing at the high lords like statues.

These extremely fanatical fighting nuns don't care about their status.

They were loyal only to the Emperor, and when the Emperor was unable to deliver revelations, the state religion became an extension of the Emperor's will, and they submitted to the new living saint, Christine.

The nuns' guns, with their dark muzzles, could unleash deadly sparks in the blink of an eye, smashing any one of them to pieces.

"Ladies and gentlemen, since our Pope is not in Terra, I will temporarily exercise the powers of the High Lord in her stead."

"These are extraordinary times, and I hope to adopt extraordinary measures."

Alfreda's voice echoed through the hall, and even if the others were unwilling, they could only hold their noses and continue listening.

Even the body of the deceased presiding officer of the Star Language Court was still in its place, its pale eyes still staring straight at them.

"Guilliman's founding of the Second Reich has been exposed, and he himself has admitted to the fact. Therefore, I can conclude that Guilliman has lost his purity."

"Considering his status as the son of the God Emperor, I can temporarily refrain from classifying him as a [heretic]."

Elfreda waved her no-longer-young hands as if pushing and pulling an accordion in the air.

Guilliman's seat seemed to possess a magical power, causing those who sat there to rapidly develop their own ambitions in a very short time.

Her greatest advantage was that she had seized upon the weaknesses of Guilliman's Second Reich, and she continued to exploit these weaknesses to further expand them.

Even Alicia, the navigator ambassador who had the biggest opinion of Guilliman, felt that the woman in front of her was completely unreasonable.

They did oppose Guilliman's radical reforms, and between their own interests and the interests of humanity as a whole, they leaned more towards their own.

However, none of the most absurd ideas that ever crossed their minds were of labeling the Emperor's thirteenth son, the great Robert Guilliman, as a "heretic."

The mere existence of such an idea is already heretical.

Even Horus, the traitorous warlord, would at least retain some basic respect and reverence for his brothers.

Even though they were on opposing sides, they never underestimated each other.

"My fellow High Lords, I can't even imagine how many of Guilliman's loyalists he has planted within the Empire during the hundred years that Guilliman has served as the Supreme Commander of the Empire, interfering with the power of the High Lords and ruling the Empire."

"Guilliman has now left Terra under pressure from us and returned to his private kingdom, but that does not mean he has lost all influence over Terra."

“These people are his henchmen, and their faith in and integrity toward the Emperor are highly questionable. Keeping them in the Empire is like a ticking time bomb.”

"Therefore, I suggest that the State Church take the lead in strictly isolating and investigating all those who have connections with Guilliman."

We will not wrong a pure follower of the Emperor, nor will we let slip a hidden heretic.

Upon hearing this, both the Minister of the Interior and the Minister of Justice turned extremely grim.

Guilliman was known for his expertise in home policy. He would review almost all of the Home Office’s important reports and documents and offer appropriate advice and revisions with incredible speed and insight.

Guilliman could even name all the Interior Ministry officials on Terra, as well as the names of various complicated and obscure departments.

He was practically a perfect government processing machine; as long as you put in documents, he could get them processed perfectly.

If that's the case, then all the bureaucrats in their Ministry of the Interior are Guilliman's cronies?

Who dares to say that their documents were not seen by Guilliman, and who dares to say that their promotion or demotion was not influenced by Guilliman?

If the National Religion can arbitrarily review the Ministry of the Interior, wouldn't that mean that the National Religion is superior to the Ministry of the Interior and other first-level departments in terms of priority and rank?
Elfreda ignored the reactions of the Ministry of Internal Affairs and the Ministry of Justice, and continued to impose her will on the other high lords.

"The influence left by Guilliman must also be removed from the state religion. He imposed a large number of his personal views and ideas on the Emperor's Word, and those things called 'reason' are undoubtedly a sign of a lack of piety."

"Faith must be extreme; faith that is not extreme enough cannot be called faith. I will continue to work with other high-ranking members of the state religion to make appropriate adaptations to the Emperor's Holy Word, so that it can better suit the current environment and needs."

Elfreda's two orders were directed at the State Church and the Ministry of the Interior, respectively.

If she were to truly carry out her will, then the High Lords Council of Terra would give birth to a truly uncontrollable behemoth.

Elfreda wasn't stupid; she knew that if she offended all the high lords, there was no point in continuing.

She was well-versed in the art of winning one faction over another, and quickly extended goodwill to the presiding officer of the Star Torch Court and the navigator ambassador.

These people originally had conflicts of interest and obvious contradictions with Guilliman, so as long as they showed goodwill, they would naturally be more inclined to side with him.

"I suggest that Terra be placed under martial law now. We must ensure the stability of the Throne World so as not to affect the ongoing war against the Greenskins in the Ghoul Stars."

"The existence of these despicable green-skinned orcs is an affront to the majesty of the God-Emperor. Guilliman's war strategy was too conservative. They must launch a full-scale attack immediately and slaughter the green-skinned orcs."

Terra is aware of the situation in the Ghoul Stars. Every so often, a complete summary of the situation at the front is compiled and transmitted back to Terra via interstellar communication, so that the Imperial Commanders and High Lords are informed of the specific circumstances.

After Alfreda launched the coup, she also reviewed the relevant reports and records.

However, this bishop, who claimed to be extremely devout to the emperor, believed that the current strategy formulated at the front had obvious problems.

The great people of the God-Emperor and the powerful imperial army were merely able to surround the Ghoul Stars, unable to defeat and annihilate the green-skinned orcs in the first instance.

To Elfreda, this was clearly a sign of the incompetence and cowardice of the Astartes legions.

They were afraid of increasing their own casualties and cherished their meager strength, so they did not wholeheartedly dedicate themselves to the God Emperor.

Elfreda even began to suspect that these Astartes legions might be harboring enemies to enhance their own power.

As long as the greenskinned orcs of the Ghoul Stars are not wiped out, they will not retreat and will continue to receive aid and supplies from Holy Terra.

Alfreda felt as if she had seen the truth, and only in this way could she explain why there had been no news of a great victory that could proclaim the Emperor's majesty and inspire the people.

"Commander-in-Chief of the Astral Army, Imperial Navy Admiral, I need you to send more forces to the Ghoul Cluster to exterminate the Orcs."

Having already tasted the sweetness of power, the bishop became even more unrestrained in instilling her ideas into the high lords.

"You must destroy the Greenskin Orc Empire as quickly as possible to prove that no race can challenge the power and dignity of humanity."

"If those Astartes legions don't fight with all their might, then you need to urge them to show a better state and attitude."

"Remember, anyone who opposes you is an enemy of the state religion, an opponent of the Emperor's will, and a shameful traitor!"

The two high-ranking lords who held military power were speechless.

In the opponent's pitifully limited mental capacity, war seems as simple and brutal as a board game.

My troops and territory are greater than yours, and my strength is greater than yours, so naturally I must defeat my opponent.

This is an extremely foolish and naive idea; no soldier or officer with war experience would think that way.

Didn't Elfreda organize a campaign against the Chaos Rebellion on her home planet before? How come she's become so muddleheaded now?
The commander-in-chief of the Astral Army patiently suppressed his anger, trying his best to control himself from smashing the crazy woman's face with a punch.

"Where did we get so many troops?"

"The Imperium of Man does indeed possess numerous Astral Forces and Planetary Defense Forces, but these individuals each have their own specific missions."

“We occupy most of the territory in the galaxy, and maintaining stability and security in these places alone consumes a large portion of our military strength.”

"The enemy doesn't just come from the Ghoul Cluster. In the Eye of Terror in the northwest of the galaxy, the forces of the warp and those traitors who betrayed the Empire also require a large army to suppress and defend against."

"We have already diverted a large portion of our forces to the Extreme Starfield to fight the orcs. Diverting more forces now will only weaken the defenses in other areas."

"Even if we wanted to temporarily expand the army, the training of these people and the supply of equipment and materials would be huge problems."

The commander-in-chief of the Astral Army earnestly advised that it's not something you can conjure up fully armed and well-trained warriors on a whim.

Unfortunately, Alfreda was not satisfied with his answer.

"Can I assume that your evasiveness is due to a lack of competence?"

"Perhaps I should find a new commander-in-chief who can meet my needs, sir."

"I never imagined that the term 'insufficient manpower' could be used to describe our great human empire."

"We have so many nesting planets and so many military worlds. As long as we recruit soldiers, we have an inexhaustible supply of troops to draw upon."

"For the sake of the Emperor, all believers should offer up their husbands, their sons, their fathers, and even women should take up arms to prove their loyalty."

“We can increase the collection of tithes, and all believers should dedicate their wealth to the Emperor and to the Crusaders who carry out the Emperor’s will.”

"Look, the problem that's bothering you is actually quite simple to solve."

Her response was a moment of silence from the Commander-in-Chief of the Star Guard.

He swore to the Emperor that he truly wanted to blow this idiot's head off with a single shot from his sidearm.

He really wanted to ask if Elfreda had been brainwashed by some unspeakable being.

Unfortunately, their weapons, including those used for ritual cooling, had been temporarily removed before they entered the meeting room.

His movements couldn't possibly be faster than the explosives fired by those fighting nuns.

"Elfreda, do you understand what kind of existence the Astartes Legion truly is?"

"They are demigods of the emperor, superhumans who have undergone genetic modification surgery. Even if we mobilize a large number of mortal armies, it will be difficult to fight against them."

Although 99% of the human empire's military force consists of mortals, the remaining 1%, representing the Astartes Legion, is the sharpest blade, capable of piercing through the defenses of any obstacle.

To deal with a mortal army, they only need one swift and precise decapitation strike to inflict a devastating blow on the mortal army's command.

Without a commanding brain, even the largest number of ordinary soldiers are just headless flies, lacking organization and cohesion.

"That's your problem, Commander-in-Chief. Do you expect me to come up with a way to deal with those Astartes?"

"This is your duty."

Elfreda spread her hands, her face full of disdain and helplessness.

“If you can’t do it, then I’ll find someone else. I am now the agent of the Emperor’s will, and it is obvious that I have this authority.”

“Besides, they have Astartes, and so do we,” the bishop pointed to the sky and continued, “those Imperial Fists.”

"The Imperial Fist is the Terra Guard, the resolute executor of the Emperor's will. Let them fight against the Ultramarines, the Dark Angels, and the Blood Angels."

“They have already lost their Primarch, Roger Dorn. All we need to do is show our attitude and unwavering resolve. Don’t worry that the Imperial Fist won’t agree to our demands.”

"Perhaps we can also win over the Seventh Legion and make it a direct force of the state religion, which would be a good option."

The commander-in-chief of the Astral Army had already sat down, completely at a loss for words.

The Empire's most serious and highest-ranking High Lord Council has been turned into a childish joke by this foolish woman.

Using the emperor's name to intimidate others, shirking responsibility, and resorting to violence at the slightest disagreement—this is the attitude and method of Alfreda, the spokesperson for the state religion.

Not to mention the Pope of the state religion, even a country woman is more rational and clear-headed than her.

They were all now very curious about how this bishop, whose mind was full of naive and ridiculous ideas, would maintain the fruits of his coup.

The high lords are indeed currently confined to the conference room by her, but they cannot stay here forever.

Once they are released, they will naturally no longer obey Elfreda's will and will retaliate fiercely for the humiliation they have suffered.

Even if they were all killed by this madwoman, the various factions outside would elect new high lords to stop her absurd behavior.

"The Emperor approves of Bishop Elfreda's decision."

Christine, the living saint who had always stood beside her mother like a statue of the Virgin Mary, suddenly spoke.

A dazzling golden light emanated from her body, showering down upon the high lords.

“On behalf of the Emperor, I bestow blessings upon you. As long as you remain loyal and do your best to fulfill the mission entrusted to you by the Emperor, you will not be affected.”

"On the contrary, if you become heretics, this blessing will immediately be met with the Emperor's punishment."

Christine tapped her finger, and the corpse of the Star Language Court Presiding Officer, who had been dead, suddenly began to writhe violently. The corpse, which had been devoid of all life, suddenly burst forth with vigorous vitality.

Deformed organs such as tentacles, eyes, and teeth, which can penetrate any part of the body, began to spread from the host's corpse.

In just a few breaths, this former high lord of the empire had transformed into an indescribable monster covered in claws and tentacles.

It began to roar with hunger and lashed out at the surrounding high lords, brandishing its terrifying slimy tentacles.

The nuns, who were already prepared for battle, fired their explosive guns in unison, the deafening gunfire echoing throughout the conference hall.

Under the command of Sister Teresa, they systematically used barrages to halt the monster's attack and began firing anti-psychic warheads made from the ashes of the Untouchables.

Upon contact with the ashes of the soulless, the mutated monster covered in tentacles immediately erupted in sharp roars and screams.

Those grayish-black blasphemous bodies seemed to have come into contact with strong acid, quickly dissolving and withering, and were soon killed by the battle nuns in front of the High Lord.

The crowd was momentarily stunned, overwhelmed by an uncontrollable sense of fear.

Others might not realize it, but the Star Torch Court Master and the Navigator Ambassadors did: the body of the dead High Lord had been transformed into a living Chaos Egg.

These monsters, which have lost all reason and become deformed and chaotic due to absorbing too much warp energy, are the most terrifying warp monsters.

They are like self-destruct bombs that indiscriminately attack anything within their range, even other warp demons.

"This is no blessing, it's clearly a warp curse!"

"Your Majesty, why have these warp evils appeared on Holy Terra under the illumination of Your divine light?"

The high lords were filled with despair; it was clear that the other side had planted a vicious curse on them all.

Any act that disobeys the other party will immediately trigger this curse, transforming the host into a Chaos Egg within a short period of time.

Having become a Chaos Egg, its soul was naturally devoured, and it had no chance to return to the Golden Throne.

Vicious, this is absolutely vicious.

Even the most dull-witted person now understands that this was all a meticulously planned conspiracy.

Spreading scandals about the Second Reich, driving away Primarchs, sparking a rebellion within the State Church, and allowing the forces of the Warp to take advantage of the situation, have now even plunged the entire Highlord Council into crisis.

The high lords are only now realizing how comfortable Terra is with Roboute Guilliman in charge.

Guilliman would at least try to reason with them, and the worst thing he did was slam the tribunes of the Household onto the wall.

They drove away the people who could have helped them the most, and now, apart from praying to the emperor to save them, it seems that they can only hope that the Imperial Guards, who have disappeared somewhere, will appear and turn the tide.

Where are the Imperial Guards? Not a single one has come?
However, since the conspirators behind this have already calculated all of this, can they still ignore the variable of the Imperial Guard?
Clearly, it wasn't that the Imperial Guards didn't want to come, but rather that they were no longer able to.

"What about the Assassin's Court? Guilliman may have left Terra, but the Assassin's Court is definitely still under his control. He couldn't possibly ignore something so outrageous."

“Unless he tacitly approved of all of this, he hopes that those hidden in the shadows, like Elfreda, will all come out and give him the opportunity to wipe them all out.”

"It's only a rebellion if it fails."

"And now, Alfreda and the forces behind her have succeeded."

The high lords were devastated; they realized they had made a grave mistake.

……

When the doors to the Highlord's main council chamber opened again, a political storm that would engulf the entire empire also swept over Terra.

Bishop Elfreda, through a unanimous decision by the High Lords, became the acting pope of the state religion, a vast religious organization of the empire.

Before the return of the living saint Euphrates Cheryl, she will exercise his power in the High Lords Council and frantically expand her influence within the state church.

Elfreda carried out a thorough purge of the state clergy on Terra, replacing them with her own trusted followers in key positions.

The other high lords, though aware of the truth, found their lives entirely in the hands of the other side.

High Lords are human too, though they are capable of risking their lives for certain purposes and missions.

However, the tragic fate of being twisted into a chaotic egg is still too horrifying.

They tacitly chose to temporarily submit to Alfreda and continued to secretly seek solutions.

However, Elfreda also kept a close watch on the high lords, and she even sent some priests of the State Church into other Imperial departments to carry out supervisory duties.

The entire High Lords Council almost instantly became the sole authority of the state religion.

Elfreda ordered a massive holy war expedition, requiring all empires that adhered to the state religion and worshipped the emperor to pay an additional religious tithe.

The conscripted population and taxes were converted into real war power and sent to the battlefields in the Far East.

This war, which was originally between humans and green-skinned orcs, gradually became more chaotic and confusing due to the changes that occurred in the state religion.

……

“I must meet with the Imperial Guard Protector; it’s time for this absurdity to end.”

“I also bear responsibility for forcing the Imperial Commander to leave, and I must atone for my mistakes.”

“I really didn’t expect that just this little provocation would actually make Guilliman leave. I even suspect that he had been thinking about leaving for a long time, but we just gave him a reason.”

"Navigator Ambassador Alicia said in a deep voice to her confidante."

Three months have passed since that coup meeting, and during this time, Terra has fallen under Alfreda's influence and control.

This mad acting pope eliminated any dissidents who stood in his way with exceptionally bloody methods.

All of this was something Guilliman had never seen in Terra.

Even if Guilliman had conflicts of interest with other high lords, he would not resort to extreme and unsavory methods to avoid a complete breakdown in relations.

People are always perverse; when Guilliman was around, they all opposed him.

But now that Alfreda has taken over, they've started to miss Guilliman again.

Whether for their own benefit or for the greater good of the empire, they must find a way to break the deadlock.

Alicia, on the other hand, intends to seek the help of the Imperial Guard.

Since the Emperor ascended the Golden Throne, these golden-armored guards have rarely appeared before mortals, and they almost never attend High Lords' Councils.

However, it is undeniable that the Royal Guard is a powerful force on Terra that cannot be ignored.

If they can secure the help of the Imperial Guards, they will be able to regain their military advantage.

Previous coups have demonstrated the importance of force.

Alicia had long planned to make contact with the Imperial Guard.

However, it seemed that the emperor's guards were preoccupied with something, and it was only today that she was officially allowed to meet Diocletian, the tribune.

"This is the storage device containing all my video evidence. Keep it safe. If anything happens to me, hand it over to the Imperial Guard again."

The ambassador handed a memory device, no bigger than a fingertip, to his attendant.

She didn't know if her attempt would activate the curse left in her body by the living saint Christine, but for the sake of the empire, she was still willing to muster the courage to try.

Of course, she was well prepared. At this moment, she was wearing the anti-magic headband that the Silent Sisters used on Black Ship psionicists. This could greatly suppress her psionic power and isolate her from external psionic influences.

Secondly, she carried a finger bone of an untouchable being on her person.

Although this was almost a form of slow suicide for a psionicist, Alicia guessed that it would prevent the cursed power within her from erupting.

She wanted to save the empire, but she didn't want to become a Chaos Egg.

The servant took the item entrusted to him by his master and carefully hid it inside his body.

The master and servant then discreetly made their way quickly to the meeting place agreed upon with the Imperial Guards.

When they arrived at the designated location, they found it deserted.

Alicia whispered the code she had agreed upon with the Imperial Guard. Just after they said the code, a tall Imperial Guard appeared out of nowhere.

He slowly removed his helmet, revealing a weathered and resolute face.

“You’ve finally arrived, Tribunal Diocletian,” said Ambassador Navigator.

"I have something very important to tell you, it's extremely important."

Diocletian first concealed the weariness in his eyes. The Shadow Prison Uprising had drained him of too much energy, leaving this tribunal who had once fought alongside the Emperor struggling to keep up.

"explain."

The Imperial Guard generally does not interfere with the actions of the High Lords, just as Guilliman once used his power as the Supreme Commander of the Empire to interfere with the High Lords, which the Imperial Guard did not care about at all.

They wouldn't bother with anything as long as the High Lords Council wasn't completely overthrown.

Their only concern is the emperor, and they will only show their faces and express their opinions when the emperor's safety is involved.

However, aside from exhaustion, Diocletian had some extremely encouraging news in his mind:

According to the mechanical priests responsible for maintaining the Golden Throne, as well as the Royal Guard, the Emperor on the Golden Throne seems to be in somewhat better condition.

Their instruments detected more active vital signs than before, and they even heard the emperor's heartbeat.

Some optimistic members of the Imperial Guard even predicted that the Emperor might recover from his injuries in the near future.

This news was the best consolation for all the royal guards, who desperately longed for their lord to step down from the throne and lead them again.

Compared to this news, the High Lord's petty affairs are utterly insignificant. Once the Emperor returns, will the High Lord still have any reason to exist?
"I think you probably already know that the State Church has suddenly risen to prominence recently. Acting Pope Elfreda has taken control of the State Church and turned it into an extremely fanatical and blind organization."

"She expanded her power within the Highlord Council and, through certain means, influenced and controlled us Highlords."

The Imperial Guard officer nodded, indicating that he was aware of the matter.

Alicia was uneasy at the other party's indifferent attitude, but she gritted her teeth and continued speaking.

“We suspect that Elfreda and her living saint daughter are using some kind of well-disguised warp magic, and that they have planted a curse called the Emperor’s Blessing in our bodies.”

"Behind them lies the subspace, a malevolent entity from the sea of ​​souls."

Alicia had assumed that her accusations would prompt the Imperial Guard to take immediate action.

After all, one of their responsibilities is to eradicate any Chaos corruption on Terra, thereby helping them investigate and punish Elfreda.

No matter how powerful the battle nuns are, they can't compare to the Imperial Guard.

Faced with these golden-armored guards, even the most ordinary people are nothing more than lambs to the slaughter.

But Diocletian remained calm and replied:
"Although we are distracted by certain things that cannot be explained, it does not mean that we are completely unaware of what is happening on Terra."

“Ambassador Navigator, I can tell you very clearly that the Imperial Guard has already launched an investigation into Elfreda and that living saint named Christine.”

“Even our most experienced members of the Imperial Guard, using the most professional equipment, could not detect the ‘warp magic’ you speak of.”

“We have a good understanding of the power of the four Chaos Gods, and Elfreda has no connection with them.”

Although the Imperial Guard does not possess psionic abilities, they frequently interact with the warp and psionic energy.

Therefore, each of them is a psionic expert, and is most adept at identifying disguised psionic enemies.

“How is that possible? That’s impossible!” Alicia exclaimed in astonishment, then pressed on, “But the Star Court’s chairman did die at the meeting, and his body was twisted into a Chaos Egg!”

"This was witnessed by all of our High Lords. Those battle nuns used anti-psychic weapons to kill the Chaos Egg that Christopher's corpse had transformed into."

However, the tribunal simply gestured for Alicia to pause.

"First of all, I can tell you very clearly that there is absolutely no trace of the Chaos Egg ever existing on Terra."

“We will absolutely not run such blasphemous filth and defile even a speck of soil in the Throne World.”

"And I can assure you that Christopher, whom you described as turning into the Chaos Egg and then being killed, is still alive and well, and continues to lead the work of the Star Court."

Alicia was struck dumb, standing there in a daze.

"How can this be?"

(End of this chapter)