Light's Dawn of Azeroth

Chapter 396.5. Old Gani's Garbage Theory: Anecdotes from the Black Iron Bar - Bonus Chapter [65]

(Bonus chapter for the "Taoshuke" brothers [1/5])
The cacophony of music echoed, along with the heart-wrenching, hoarse singing of the Dark Iron dwarves, accompanied by rhythmic drumbeats, injecting an undeniable energy into the new day at the Dark Iron Bar.

Despite the many troubles that have recently occurred in Darkhearth, despite the fact that the Firelord almost descended upon the material world yesterday, and despite the fact that the Dark Iron Dwarves were only one step away from becoming "elves" of fire, none of these things could stop these drunkards from indulging in pleasure.

The Dark Iron slave owners lived a life of debauchery in this entertainment district of Darkhearth, while all sorts of people from all over the world often gathered here. In addition, the unique seclusion of Blackrock Mountain made this bar a "pearl" of the gray area over time.

It's no exaggeration to say that if a paladin kicked open the door of the Black Iron Bar and used "Evil Detection" right away, about 80% of the guys there would be glowing red, and the remaining 20% ​​would run away as soon as they saw the paladin rush in.

Calling this place a "mixed bag" is perfectly fine.

The worst part is that Irelia actually intended to do that when she entered the tavern, but luckily Marlaad stopped her.

Although the Lightforged do not have "Evil Detection," their Holy Light perception can still quickly identify sinful individuals. Of course, those who lurk in the darkness generally do not like to be discovered.

Therefore, when the Lightforgers began to sense evil, a great war was already inevitable.

Given the secrecy of this operation, Irelia was quickly pulled aside by Marlaad and given a stern lecture, while the others went into the bar one after another.

The Thorium Brotherhood, though known as the Rebels, are regulars here. They spend so much money on drinks and entertainment that they even have a spacious private room, so that the esteemed Watchers and other guests don't have to deal with those outsiders whose every burp exudes darkness.

This is a good thing.

To prevent some fool from getting too drunk and suddenly grabbing a bottle and hitting the guard on the head, perhaps a merciful saint would forgive the drunkards' antics, but the valiant heroes who came with him would definitely burn the bar and its scoundrels to the ground.

"It's so vibrant, with everything bursting forth with life."

Diakum, in his human form, sat in a chair and remarked to the others around him:

"A casual glance would reveal three of the top ten most wanted criminals in Stormwind Kingdom reveling here, and my ears tell me there are at least seventeen evil deeds in the planning stages here."

"It's more than that."

Archbishop Nelly, who had taken a break from her busy schedule to assist in the battle against the Balrog King, pouted and said:

"There are six demons and a Khesar hiding in the crowd. I also noticed a group of cultists having a meeting in the wine cellar. The bar owner is a dwarf sorcerer who openly employs his succubus servant as a bartender."

I'm pretty sure that eleven of the drunken guests were bewitched by the succubus. What a lucrative business!

Based on my interpretation of the graffiti on the walls, there are also Ravenholdt Manor's action brokers and a long-standing advertisement from the Goblin Consortium recruiting outlaws.

This place is indeed interesting; it's an underground intelligence gathering hub.

"Actually, it's not surprising that little Iriel has the urge to purify evil."

The masked, light-forged swordsman, Tramon, leaned against the wall, shaking his head and saying:

“I almost drew my sword just now. I’m sure there were at least seven killing intents directed at us.”

"This is not a place for Holy Light Walkers; it's a haven for filth and corruption!"

Captain Faria grabbed her glass and took a sip of the lava-like liquor. Half her face turned red, and she then complained:

"This isn't the kind of wine a Holy Light Warrior should drink; it's too tempting. But those rebels really can only hide in places like this. Sir, how long are we going to stay here?"

"Thorison tried to persuade his lords to deal with the fire demon sages in Darkhearth before heading to the Firelands."

Diakum explained:
"To prevent those bastards from wreaking havoc in this corrupt city on the orders of the Balrog King, the Dark Iron dwarves must rebel against enslavement. This is in accordance with the teachings and expectations of the Holy Light. We have come for the cause of justice."

Therefore, gentlemen, please be patient.

The others nodded in agreement. They knew that the expedition against the Flame Demon King was the Star Soul Lord's order, so they had to take it seriously.

However, after Commander Diakum took the lead in drinking the first cup of wine, the Warriors of Light also began to drink heartily without worry. They were not prohibited from drinking alcohol in the Holy Light Legion, but they could only drink the weak communion wine. The various drinks provided by the Black Iron Bar suited the tastes of these fierce warriors.

As for getting drunk?

What a joke! How can the Warrior of Light be so unrestrained?

When you're about 70-80% drunk, recite the Holy Light Scripture to clear your mind, and then continue drinking. That way, you won't break the rules.

You cannot drink alcohol while praising the Holy Light, as that is blasphemous; but you can praise the Holy Light while drinking alcohol, which is called utmost piety. Believers should always treat rigid precepts with a flexible attitude.

Soon, Chief Repi, an old friend of Dezko the Black Bull, arrived reeking of alcohol and carrying a case of fine wine, pushing open the door to the large private room.

This big black guy is pretty trendy. He's wearing black goblin sunglasses, has all sorts of tattoos on his arms, and styled his hair in a cool way. He's wearing a sleeveless shirt that shows off his muscular arms, and he's also wearing a big gold chain.

He's clearly got the makings of a great musician.

Moreover, he really is the chieftain of a small tauren clan in the Desolace, although that clan has long been merged into the Bloodhoof clan. But he named his band the "Tauren Chieftains" band, so you can't even say it's false advertising.

"Oh, my old friends, as majestic as eagles! It's such a pleasure to see you two in this godforsaken place far from home."

Chief Rapi had just finished a spectacular performance and opened his arms to embrace Dezko, but then rubbed his eyes in confusion and said to Hamuul Runetotem:
"Maybe I've had too much to drink, or maybe I haven't had enough, Hamuul. Why is your head on fire? Are you trying to taste grilled beef?"

"Ha ha ha ha"

Everyone at the table laughed.

The lives of the Minotaur people are actually quite unrestrained. Unlike what ordinary people think, they do not regard anything related to "cows" as taboo, and they often make jokes related to "beef".

They even eat beef.
This might seem like cannibalism, but in reality, the Minotaur only looks like a cow; they are truly intelligent beings and have no blood relation to domestic animals like cows.

If I had to say something, I could only say that on the day Mother World "created the Minotaur," she might have drunk an extra glass of milk, which gave her a strange inspiration.

After Hamuul explained the Flame Druid faction, Chieftain Rapi laughed heartily. He sat down, opened the wine he had brought, and very considerately handed the first bottle to the highest-ranking Watchman, before distributing the bottles to everyone else.

"You remind me of those legendary 'fire bulls'."

Chief Rapi took a swig of wine, rinsed his mouth, and complained:

"We've never seen those ancient madmen, but every clan has such legends, don't they? Those who worship fire set themselves on fire, letting themselves feel the pain of their flesh burning in the flames, to pay homage to their evil gods."

By the way, what was that evil god called again?

I just broke up with my human girlfriend a few days ago, and I was thinking of writing a song about fire, but I forgot her name.

“Wo Erduosi”.

Hamuer said:

"The Minotaur's god of fire, said to be the first minotaur to embrace flames, is a true madman, and Rape, your speed in changing girlfriends seems a bit too fast, doesn't it?"

"That's how it is when you're making music."

She dedicated herself to art, and gradually that dedication led her to the bedroom. Moreover, we broke up peacefully, and maybe we can even have some friendly sex in the future. After all, once she's tasted the bull, it's hard for her to enjoy bland food anymore.
Uh, sorry, I was being too vulgar, saint.

I shouldn't have said those things in front of you; I'll punish myself with a drink!

Chief Repi saw Dezko blinking rapidly, immediately stood up to apologize to Diakum, downed a large bottle of wine in one gulp, then sat down again and waved his hand, saying:
“Yes, it’s Ordos, exactly like you are now burning. But, Dezko, you Sunwalkers seem to have a different interpretation of this story? Tell me about it, I need some inspiration.”

"Well, they're largely the same."

Guangzhu Daheiniu shrugged and said:

"The only difference is that the legend of the Dawn Chaser tribe has a few more lines, saying that Ordos was once a fanatical believer of the sun god Anser, but after witnessing the solar eclipse and experiencing Anser's endless slumber, it went mad with despair."

The madman wanted to burn himself to ignite the dawn of Anser, so he prayed for fire and turned himself into a burning monster.

It is said that the flames will burn its body, but will never give it peace.

That's the consequence of blasphemy!

"Wait! This is also related to 'Anser'?"

Diakum put down his glass, looked at the three minotaurs, and said:
"To be honest, I've been searching for the story of 'Anser, the Sun God' recently. Your Minotaur creation myth is the only ancient story in the entire star system that explicitly mentions the appearance of a Sun God."

There's still time, so tell me.

The three minotaurs exchanged a glance, and Hamuul spoke first:
“Well, Vigilant, our Tauren mythology is likely a fusion of animism in ancient times. Even we ourselves only consider it a tradition. We can’t find much evidence to prove the rationality of our mythology.”

"It's alright. That's how myths are. Nine parts are false and one part is true. Mortals like to chase after those sacred descriptions, but in the eyes of those who truly understand, that obscure truth is the real treasure worth pursuing."

Archbishop Nelly leaned against Diakum, blinked, and said:
"If the Tauren are also among the earliest creatures to emerge in the world of Azeroth, then your creation myth does indeed have some merit."

"Okay, then I'll give you a brief explanation."

Hamuer said, "The main reason is that the Minotaur's creation myth is in poetic form, and it would take several hours to sing the whole thing."

"I'll sing! Consider it a welcome dinner for everyone."

Leipi laughed and shouted a few times towards the outside of the private room. Before long, a group of girls from various races brought him musical instruments, including some high elves.

Wow, this Tauren chieftain's charm is a bit too much! Does being a musician really give him an edge in this regard?

In short, as Rapi sang the ancient creation myth of the Minotaur in his husky, magnetic voice, Hamuul also gave a brief summary of Diakum's story in a light tone:
"We Tauren believe that Mother Earth created the world and ended the tragic Dark Ages. She used her great power to save the entire world from the endless night and then shaped all things and the elemental spirits."

Mother Earth shaped her favorite children.

The radiant Anser and the graceful Musa, together with the elements, harmonize the world, allowing all things to grow.

However, Mother Earth was exhausted from her battle with the darkness, but before falling into a deep sleep, in order to protect her beloved children, Mother Earth hid Anser in her left eye and Musa in her right eye.

In this way, His children will not be found by the ancient evil.

But without the sun and moon, the world fell into an endless winter, plunging the world it had created into silence once more.

After awakening, Mother Earth discovered that the world was almost destroyed due to her negligence. Heartbroken, she made a great sacrifice, sending her most beloved child out of her home. Thus, Anser brought light and dispelled the cold, while Musa nourishes all things in every gentle moonlight.

Thus, the sun, moon, and all celestial bodies achieved their fixed alternation, the elemental spirits returned to harmony, and all things ushered in a new era.

Hamuer explained it very briefly.

As he said, the creation myth of the Minotaur is very complicated, with many plots that are obviously far-fetched by later generations, but in general, the myth is full of those simple creationist themes.

At first glance, it seemed unremarkable, but Diakum's fingers tapped lightly on the table.

After a moment, he said:
"So, you think 'Musha' is 'Lady Elune,' right?"

"Yes."

Hamuer looked around, somewhat embarrassed, and said in a low voice:
"But the night elves obviously don't like us calling the moon goddess that, so I usually don't mention the name 'Musha' in front of the druids."

I understand what you're asking. If Lady Elune is the true god of the realm of life, then the corresponding 'Sun God Anser' must have a place in the Holy Light. However, as I just said, we can't find any evidence to support the existence of the legendary myth.

Therefore, I dare not answer whether Anser is real or not.

“Anser is real, just as Musa’s ‘Radiance of the Moon’ still shines on the starry sky.”

Diakum stated definitively:

"The symbolism in the Minotaur creation myth is terrifying. This myth may even be related to the origin of the universe, but we can hardly understand the details today."

"Does Anser really exist?"

The drunken Sunwalker Dezko nearly dropped his wine glass, exclaiming in surprise:
"Doesn't that mean we've always believed in the true God of Holy Light?"

"Is not this nonsensical?"

Captain Faria, who was listening to the story nearby, couldn't help but complain:

"Before you met Commander Diakum, you had the legacy of the 'Sun Herald'! This legendary profession's legacy isn't something you can just pick up anywhere; at least, there isn't another Sun Herald in the Holy Light Legion!"

This fully demonstrates that the Tauren Dawn Chasers do indeed have a profound connection with the Holy Light.

You may be the true 'People of Light'.

But even if the sun god Anser truly exists, His current situation must be very strange, since even the Naaru are unaware of His existence.

"So, is there a possibility?"

Dick suddenly said:
"Are the Naaru actually Anser's creations? No, that's not accurate. The Naaru should be the joint creations of Anser and Musa, which also explains their unique 'dual nature of light and darkness'."

As for who the 'Mother Earth' mentioned in this creation myth is...
Hmm, this still needs some thought, but I doubt it's the Star Soul Lord of Azeroth.

This creative power is somewhat beyond His authority.

At least for now, He cannot do these things.

------

While a group of Eredar and Tauren were discussing the creation myth, Yrel, who had just been scolded, was sulking in a bar.

She almost caused a disaster just now, although she doesn't think she did anything wrong. As a Holy Light Walker, she should fight against evil!
However, Irelia was a good girl, and after having a few drinks, she felt relieved. Then she started to think about her own feelings, and she felt that she should give Marlad a gift.

On the one hand, Marlade helped her a lot, and whenever she got into trouble, it was usually her great-uncle who helped her deal with it.

On the other hand, during the battle at Mount Hyjal, Marad's "Hammer of the Naaru" was damaged once again. Although it was forged from divine fragments, its true form was actually just an ordinary garrison crystal-forged warhammer.

As Marad's strength steadily increased, that weapon began to somewhat limit his effectiveness.

"But where can I find a good hammer?"

As Irene sat at the bar, chin in hand, deep in thought, she heard a strange noise. Looking down, she saw a tiny, shifty-eyed, brightly colored, strange little dinosaur lying next to her glass, stealing a sip of the wine she had paid for.

For a moment, Irelia thought she was seeing things.

She rubbed her eyes hard, and after confirming that she wasn't seeing things, she tried to grab the "wine thief," but when she reached out, only a strange wisp of gas dissipated from her hand.

"Ugh, it stinks!"

Irelia leaped up, swishing her tail, while a group of drunkards around her started a tavern brawl over who farted.

Amidst the commotion, Irelia, with impeccable manners, tossed a few silver coins onto the table to pay for her drinks. But as she left, she heard a voice calling to her:
"Hey, Blue Skin, over here!"

Irelia turned around and saw the wine thief from earlier in the corner.

The guy was still clutching a broken bottle in his claws, blood dripping from the shards—a real bar weapon.

"who are you?"

The little hoof asked curiously, inwardly lamenting that there seemed to be far too many strange and monstrous beings in Azeroth.

"Heh, revealing my name will definitely give you a shock."

Old Gani shook its head and let out a strange laugh, waving its nimble claws as it said:
“But I know what you’re worried about. Listen to me, what you need is the most precious ‘junk’ in Darkhearth, a warhammer designed and forged by the Thorium Brotherhood to fight against Ragnaros.”

It's incredibly powerful!
However, it is utter garbage; go find it.

Consider this payment for treating me to drinks.

I have to go now, see you next time.

After saying that, old Gani turned to leave, but Irelia grabbed his tail and said:

"Explain yourself! I need the most powerful warhammer as a gift for my boss who's been so kind to me, but you gave me a piece of junk? You heartless scoundrel who steals alcohol!"

"Tch, the wisdom of mortals."

Old Gani gave a disdainful look and said impatiently:

"Just go ask the Thorium Brotherhood's quartermaster for it. It really is a piece of junk, a product of a pathetic paradox. They need Ragnaros's Flame Essence to make that warhammer reach its perfect power."

However, they forged that warhammer to fight against the Balrog King.

If they obtain the essence of Ragnaros, it means they have killed Ragnaros, and therefore they will not need the warhammer.

Those brain-dead dwarves spent a hundred years drinking and designed a piece of junk that will never be used in the secret chambers of the Black Iron Bar. Alas, that's why I love the Black Iron Bar.

This place always brings me a lot of fun.

At this point, old Gani said to Irele:

"I think you're a pretty good girl, so next time you find some fun junk, remember to give it to me, and I'll give you a reward."

Well, if it's the trash created by that vigilant, that would be perfect.

I'll charge double.

(End of this chapter)