If you are a brother, come and play football

Chapter 203 My Brother Paul Ma

Chapter 203 My Brother Paul Ma (Please Subscribe)
Lu Deyang changed his clothes and got up with his teammates.

I saw AC Milan players as soon as I stepped out of the locker room.

This Milan team is missing a few players, but most of them are familiar faces.

"Paul."

"Deyang".

Maldini stopped and stared at Lu Deyang for a few seconds before saying, "Even if it's you, I won't give up today, neither will we."

"come on!"

Lu Deyang said with a smile, then turned and walked towards the exit of the passage.

Baresi remarked from the side, "Talking too much in this situation makes one seem insecure."

Maldini shrugged.

No wonder he didn't have any confidence when facing Lu Deyang.

If he weren't so poorly educated, he would have even wanted to write an article to express his confidence, just like when fighting in ancient times.

boom--

As the players from both sides walked out of the tunnel, the atmosphere in the stadium immediately became heated.

There were all sorts of posters and jerseys in the stands.

The stadium, with a capacity of over 53000, displayed an amazing level of enthusiasm.

In particular, Lu Deyang's name resounded throughout the Vienna sky even before the show began.

A simple wave of the hand immediately elicited a shout an octave higher.

In front of the television, Mancini was having a long phone conversation with Vialli.

"Dejan is quite popular."

Mancini said in a low voice.

Are you jealous of Deyang?

"Vially asked."

“How could that be? No way, we’re a team…” Mancini muttered.

"Yes, but you've seen Manchester United's new song recently, right? That's what you call a great combination. I never even thought that a players' chorus could make it onto the music charts."

Vialli said with a smile.

"Come on Your Res" immediately topped the UK charts after its release and has remained there for two weeks.

It ranks first in Denmark and second in Ireland.

This is quite an achievement for a player, and even many singers have never accomplished such a feat.

Vialli continued, "Given Dejan's popularity, it's only a matter of time before he becomes a platinum artist."

"Enough, stop!" Mancini shouted. "This guy, I have to remind him that football is the most important thing..."

After saying that, Mancini hung up the phone.

Vialli smiled and shrugged.

He did it on purpose!

Becoming a professional player was a dream come true for Mancini.

But that guy always wants to be the center of attention.

Perhaps someone with this kind of personality will really become a coach in the future.

The Serie A season isn't over yet, which is a bit of a disappointment for Vialli.

Even though he wasn't there in person, he could feel the fervor of the stadium.

The broadcast cameras kept panning across the stands.

Legends from both sides, legends from both countries, and some celebrity fans were all in the stands.

Both teams have a long enough history to guarantee a large number of legends.

AC Milan goes without saying; most of the coaches in Serie A have trained at the Rossoneri, either coming from Milan's youth academy or having played for Milan.

Paolo Maldini's father, Cesare, and his former teammates were in the stands.

Italian legends like Zoff and Riva were also sitting with Rivera.

Buffon's great-uncle Lorenzo Buffon is 66 years old, but looks no different from someone in his 50s.

The Manchester United trio and their former teammates sat together.

While players like Nobby Styles and Pat Cressland may not be household names, they were among the last Manchester United players to win the Champions League.

Bobby Charlton was seated next to a Leeds United legend, Jack Charlton.

He is also his younger brother.

Although he was always overshadowed by his brother's brilliance, he also played for Leeds United for 30 years and is one of the most important players in Leeds United's history. After retiring, he also achieved good results as a manager at Middlesbrough.

As for celebrity fans, there are quite a few.

They were fans first and then stars; they became fans from a young age due to their families' influence.

There are also rebellious ones like Nadal, whose uncle is a Barcelona legend who likes yellow horses.

During the warm-up, Manchester United players mainly passed the ball to Lu Deyang.

Lu Deyang then gained a better understanding of [Neskens].

This midfielder, known as the "decagonal warrior," is also called the "shadow of Cruyff."

However, he is not without his flaws.

For example, his passing at that time lacked some imagination, which made him play like an infinitely energetic Arteta.

However, this is not a problem for Lu Qiuwang.

Lu Deyang had already drawn Rui Costa's passing ability.

So the following are all advantages.

His height and strength are similar to Matthäus'.

His long passing ability is not as outstanding as Matthäus', but his ability to make forward runs is very strong.

Therefore, in the game footage, he often dribbles the ball and plays a one-two with Cruyff before scoring in the penalty area.

Neeskens was also very aggressive in fights; the Dutch at that time were known for their heavy kicks.

Plus his good friend Redondo.

Lu Deyang felt somewhat terrified.

Today we're going to intensify Basten's training.

"Let's go, get ready to go on stage."

Steve Bruce waved and called out.

Lu Deyang and his teammates walked to the sidelines together.

The fans from both sides immediately got excited.

The whole world knows that this highly anticipated battle is about to begin.

A giant TIFO was also displayed in the stands.

AC Milan fans spelled out "Keep the trophy, fight forever" in a copy, and also displayed a giant red devil holding a knife.

At first glance, it looked like a TIFO from a Manchester United fan.

The Manchester United side of the stands read: "TAKE ME HOME, UNITED ROAD!"

I drew a trophy between TAKE and ME.

The image above shows Lu Deyang and his teammates from behind, symbolizing the wish for the players to bring the trophy home. The original phrase comes from the famous country folk song "Take Me Home, Country Road".

Even before the match started, the fans of both teams had already set the tone for the game.

This is a war that no one will give up.

The two teams, represented by red, are making the temperature in Vienna rise with their passion today.

"The most important final in European football is about to begin, but last year it was a bit lacking. European football feels less vibrant without Dejan."

"I believe AC Milan will not agree with this. The Rossoneri who have made it to the final today are the Champions League winners from last year. This match is an important moment for them to strive to become the defending champions."

"Perhaps, but Dejan won't let them succeed."

"Ahem, let's take a look at the starting lineups for both sides."

Manchester United's 4-4-2 formation with two holding midfielders:
Goalkeeper: Schmeichel
Defenders: Irwin, Steve Bruce, Pallister, Gary Neville

Midfielders: Ludjohn, Redondo, Scholes, Roy Keane, Beckham
Forward: Brian McClair.

AC Milan's 4-4-2 formation with two defensive midfielders:
Goalkeeper: Sebastian Rossi

Defenders: Paolo Maldini, Franco Baresi, Costacurta, Panucci

Midfielders: Boban, Desailly, Albertini, Donadoni
Forwards: Marco van Basten, Marco Simeone.

"Looking at the lineups of both sides, AC Milan's lineup is more luxurious."

"Yes, but both teams also have players from their youth academies who have made appearances, such as Maldini, Albertini, Scholes, Beckham and Neville. In this respect, both teams rely more on players developed by their own teams, and these young players have proven that they have enough ability."

"Both teams are very tough defensively, so we can look forward to seeing how some of the best attackers in European football create chances."

He entered the field with his teammates.

"Paul, you'll be on the left wing later."

Lu Deyang said.

Scholes looked at Keane.

Keane snapped, "Just go when we tell you to. The boss won't mind."

Scholes nodded and quickened his pace to follow his teammates away.

He started as a striker, but his physical development couldn't keep up, so the coach moved him back to the starting position.

So far, Scholes has played in every position in the attacking third except defensive midfield, so playing wing-back isn't too difficult for him.

The players from both sides stood on either side of the referee team.

Some of the younger players were clearly overly excited.

Lu Deyang could even sense that Beckham was trembling slightly.

Perhaps this future England captain has always had a problem with his mental fortitude.

Otherwise, he wouldn't have been able to miss so many penalties at crucial moments.

The goal against Greece, on the contrary, seemed more like a fluke.

Speaking of this, Lu Deyang remembered something else.

[Neeskens] has a 100% penalty kick conversion rate throughout his career, and even in the final against Germany, it was Neeskens who took the penalty that Cruyff won.

When the music ended, Bruce went up to guess the coin.

Keane then asked, "Dejan, are you playing as an attacking midfielder, or will you be playing as one of the three defensive midfielders with us?"

"Ah, I'll play attacking midfielder."

After thinking for a moment, Lu Deyang spoke.

Anyway, the position can be changed, but if Keane is put in front, he probably won't be used to playing there.

If Lu Qiuwang stands in front of the defensive midfielder, he can still keep Desailly and Albertini in check.

At 7:30 p.m., the Romanian referee, Crassuinescu, blew the whistle to start the match.

Lu Deyang glanced at the referee before running forward.

If Lu Qiuwang hadn't eliminated Marseille back then, this guy probably would have taken money to send Marseille to the next round.

Moral integrity is not very reliable.

Milan kicked off and passed the ball back to the midfield, where Albertini acted as a metronome. At this point, the Rossoneri were already showing signs of moving their playmaker deeper into the midfield.

It's just that Donadoni is too big a star and handles the ball more often.

Lu Deyang didn't rush, and crossed the center circle to maintain his distance from Albertini.

Even so, Albertini still sensed danger, and the young Demi immediately passed the ball to Boban.

Boban immediately dribbled forward.

This Croatian international is still being used as a versatile player.

Playing on the wing actually prevented him from fully utilizing his strengths, making him appear somewhat mediocre.

Boban, with his back to goal on the wing, suddenly turned and sped off, leaving Beckham behind.

Even so, he didn't hold the ball for long; after getting past it, he immediately passed it to the edge of the penalty area.

Fortunately, Pallister's early interception relieved Ferguson.

AC Milan launched just one attack, and he immediately felt the tactical discipline of the Italian team.

He was not entirely satisfied with how Beckham handled the situation.

Ferguson shouted to the field, "David, be quick when you go for the tackle. It doesn't matter if you get beaten, as long as you can catch up."

Manchester United's young players have a problem.

It's just a lack of experience.

And sometimes I don't dare to put my foot down.

It's understandable that times have changed, but he can't accept players being beaten like that.

When Irwin received the ball on the left wing, he instinctively wanted to pass it, but only continued dribbling after seeing it was Scholes.

Donadoni opted to go for the ball.

This Italian winger, who once broke the world transfer fee record, is having a tough time at AC Milan.

Both Sacchi in the past and Capello now have reduced his individual performance and increased his defensive responsibilities.

Irwin opted for a strong attack.

He and Donadoni became entangled, with Donadoni clearly at a physical disadvantage.

He could only rely on speed to shift his weight onto Erwin and keep trying to extend his leg.

Albertini wanted to go up and help, but then he saw Lu Deyang start to rush forward, which made him hesitate.

Irwin crossed the center line first, and Scholes called for the ball ahead.

Then Erwin made a diagonal pass to Lu Deyang.

Almost instantly, both Desailly and Albertini made their moves.

Beckham tried to rush forward to receive the pass, and Paolo Maldini immediately moved in to meet him.

Desailly made a very decisive move, trying to intercept the ball the moment Lu Deyang received it.

Unfortunately, Lu Deyang never stood still to receive the ball. He took a step back and hooked the ball with his foot, which thwarted Desailly's plan.

Unwilling to give up, the French charged at Lu Deyang again.

Lu Deyang turned with his left foot, noticed Albertini adjusting his position, and immediately tapped him with his heel.

Snapped--

The ball rolled directly behind Lu Deyang, who quickly turned around, causing Desailly to miss his target.

Albertini, who wanted to restrict space on the flanks, could only stay on the right wing.

Lu Deyang started very quickly, and although Desailly kept chasing, he was unable to close the distance between them.

Back in the field, Donadoni tried to press him, but Lu Deyang made a decisive pass while running.

Snapped--

This shot gave Scholes time to react, and upon seeing it, he accelerated down the wing and twisted to deliver a cross.

The crosses were of average quality, but they caused some confusion.

Costacurta failed to jump immediately, and by the time Baresi jumped, it was too late.

The Milan captain held off McClair from behind, causing McClair to lose power in his header, and Rossi rushed to the side of the penalty area and jumped up to easily catch the ball.

"This time it's still somewhat dangerous."

"Yes, mainly because the cross was a bit unpredictable. That young Manchester United player must have miskicked it, causing Costacurta to misjudge the situation."

Krudelli breathed a sigh of relief and said, "This is just the appetizer. The real test for our defense will come when Dejan launches the attack."

Rossi did not throw the ball immediately.

This gave my teammates some time to rest.

The constant back-and-forth running, with players going up to attack and then chasing back, can tire them out in a short period of time.

These are the basic skills of a goalkeeper.

The referee gestured to him, and Rossi then threw the ball to Maldini.

As soon as Maldini got the ball, Lu Deyang rushed towards him. Paolo Maldini was nearly scared to death.

He had experienced Lu Deyang's defensive ability firsthand, so he quickly turned sideways and used his ribs to block Lu Deyang and passed the ball to Baresi. Baresi then quickly passed the ball to Albertini.

Two of AC Milan's top defenders showed considerable caution when facing Lu Deyang.

Capello stood on the sidelines with his hands in his pockets.

He was very satisfied with his disciples' actions.

The concept of a defender holding the ball for extended periods in the backfield simply doesn't exist in his vocabulary.

Maldini's immediate turn and use of his body was a safer approach.

Capello didn't think he was overreacting.

When facing that number seven, you can never be too careful.

The two sides were evenly matched at one point.

Manchester United's five-man midfield formation can compensate for the lack of experience among the young players.

Most importantly, Lu Deyang kept trying to press Albertini, making it very difficult for Albertini to play.

As soon as he received the ball, Lu Deyang rushed forward and stretched out his foot.

Albertini tried to get past Lu Deyang by spinning in place while dribbling, but Lu Deyang adjusted his center of gravity and didn't try to intercept him, thwarting Albertini's plan to get past him.

Albertini still chose to pass the ball to Donadoni.

Donadoni received the ball and immediately rushed forward, easily avoiding Scholes' tackle. Fortunately, Redondo rushed in in time and poked the ball out of bounds.

"Neither team had many good attacking opportunities in the early stages of the game."

"Yes, mainly because in the final, no one wants to concede the first goal, so they play more cautiously. Dejan played in the attacking midfield position today, which put a lot of pressure on AC Milan's defensive midfielders, but he also had to face pressure from two opponents."

Donadoni didn't even wait for Panucci before throwing the ball directly to Simeone.

Simeone received the ball and immediately turned to try and find Van Basten.

However, Pallister blocked his passing lane, and the striker stepped on the ball and quickly kicked it towards the byline.

Donadoni rushed forward and had just received the ball when he was bumped by Gary Neville, causing him to fall to the ground.

The referee blew his whistle.

"Damn it, how could that be a free kick?"

Ferguson immediately rushed to the sidelines and shouted.

While Gary Neville was still standing there, Bruce and Keane found the referee.

Keane shrugged and asked, "That little bit of force couldn't possibly be a foul, right? He should get a yellow card; that's a dive!"

"I don't need you to teach me how to make the ruling."

"I saw your defender stick out his leg and trip him," Kraciunescu said unhappily.

“Referee, that’s not extending your leg, it’s using your body to block while running, it’s perfectly normal,” Steve Bruce said.

"It goes without saying."

"I'll say it again," Crassiuscu said.

Bruce pulled Keane aside and advised, "Don't get a card for arguing with the referee; the boss won't let you off the hook."

Keane glanced at Ferguson on the sidelines before grumbling as he walked toward the penalty area.

"Deyang..."

Gary Neville kept his head down, like a child caught stealing money by his parents.

"It's okay, just be more careful next time."

Lu Deyang said, "Look at those smart defenders, the moment the opponent falls to the ground, they immediately turn to the side and raise their hands to indicate that they did not attack. You can learn from them next time."

"I see!"

Gary Neville nodded.

Lu Deyang glanced at the penalty area and went straight to Van Basten.

The Dutchman turned his head and complained, "Isn't this a bit much? Shouldn't old friends have a good chat when they meet? Why are you pulling on my jersey?"

“If I were in Milan’s penalty area, Paulo and the others would do the same.”

Lu Deyang said with a smile.

Pulling a jersey doesn't mean you can keep pulling it indefinitely, otherwise that would be giving away a penalty.

The most important thing is to restrict the other party from finding a location.

Both teams took this attack very seriously, with Lu Deyang marking Van Basten closely and also keeping an eye on Desailly's position.

Boban took a run-up and then kicked the ball out.

Lu Deyang immediately took a step forward with his right foot, positioned himself in front of Basten, and jumped sideways.

The ball is at the near post, and he has to fight for that position.

Sure enough, the ball came straight towards the right post. Lu Deyang's body collided with Van Basten in mid-air, but his header flicked the ball out of the penalty area.

Seeing this, Redondo immediately passed the ball to Scholes, who was making a forward run.

Scholes was brought down by Albertini before he could even get the ball across the halfway line, forcing Manchester United's counter-attack to stop.

Lu Deyang steadied himself, patted Basten's arm, and ran towards the edge of the penalty area.

Van Basten watched Lu Deyang's retreating figure, then shook his head with a smile two seconds later.

Lu Deyang had saved him before and even helped him gain some fame.

It's great to be able to compete against each other again!
Seeing Lu Deyang recover his health brought him a sense of relief.

Apart from losing a lot of money on investments, he has no problems with his life.

"You all better watch out! Relying on Dejan on defense and Dejan on offense, what kind of tactics are you?" Ferguson yelled at the field.

He usually wouldn't let Lu Deyang go back to the penalty area to fight the opponent hand-to-hand.

“Dejan came back on his own.”

Gary Neville muttered.

"Then go and explain to the boss."

Bruce said.

Neville immediately shrank back.

Lu Deyang ran to the center circle, and Scholes bent down to press the ball to the ground, then flicked it to Lu Deyang with his right foot.

Lu Deyang flicked the ball with his right foot, feigning a dribble down the right flank, and Boban immediately began to chase back.

Desailly also rushed towards Lu Deyang.

Lu Deyang took a step forward with his right foot, twisted his body to turn the ball inward, and ran directly to the left wing.

Cruyff turns around!

Donadoni quickly stepped in front of Lu Deyang, and Desailly took the opportunity to rush to Lu Deyang's side and extend his right foot.

Lu Deyang stepped on the ball with his left foot, turned with his back to Desailly, and halfway through the turn, he passed the ball to his right foot and immediately switched his supporting leg, elegantly getting past Desailly with a counter-clockwise Genoa turn.

His dribbling move drew cheers from the stadium.

"Deyang!"

Even Rosenelli was somewhat dazed.

It's been a long time since we've seen Lu Deyang perform this technical move named after him.

When Desailly turned around to chase back, Lu Deyang had already taken the ball and rushed several meters away.

Maldini, fearing he couldn't defend Albertini, rushed up to cover.

Lu Deyang gave Scholes a look as he ran, then flicked the ball with the outside of his left foot as if to force a speed breakthrough, but instead tapped it to the left wing.

Scholes, who was prepared, passed the ball directly behind Maldini without stopping it.

Lu Deyang couldn't control the ball, but fortunately it wasn't very high. He turned to the side and used his thigh to block it, then quickly adjusted with small steps.

Costacurta stared wide-eyed in horror.

This movement clearly indicates preparation for a long-range shot.

But it was too late for him to rush forward.

boom--

Lu Deyang's footwork was very fast; after adjusting to his right foot, he immediately swung his foot out.

Darkness descended, the dragon moved, thunder roared, and lightning flashed as the male and female followed.

The ball was clean and decisive, without any spin, and gave neither team a chance to stop it. It rose high and passed over the heads of both teams before plummeting down and disappearing into the right side of the goal.

Rossi, standing in the penalty area, didn't even have time to make a save before turning around and heading towards the goal to retrieve the ball.

boom--

"Deyang!!!"

Huge cheers erupted from both the home and neutral fan stands.

Manchester United fans, along with local fans, filled two-thirds of the stadium, yet their voices were louder than the entire stadium.

Vienna, the music capital that once attracted Mozart, Beethoven, and Schubert to create and live here, is now occupied by the noise of football fans.

The voices were hoarse and strained, high-pitched or low-pitched, but devoid of any melody or beauty.

It is the most genuine expression of human emotion under excitement.

But it doesn't matter, Lu Deyang has already played a beautiful melody on the green field with his feet!

"Deyang!!!"

"GAOL!!!!!!!"

"What a goal! GoalGoalGoal!!!"

"In the opening stages of the game, Dejan kept using his movement and pressing to limit AC Milan's two defensive midfielders. He also appeared near his own penalty area many times to participate in the defense, and even personally challenged Van Basten for the header during set pieces."

"Just like the fans, I thought Dejan would focus on defense today and steadily look for counter-attack opportunities, but Dejan immediately gave us a huge surprise."

“What was not an opportunity became an opportunity at Dejan’s feet. He first feigned dribbling down the right flank to move AC Milan’s formation, then executed a Cruyff turn down the left flank. After drawing Donadoni and Desailly’s attention, he followed up with a counter-clockwise Genoa turn, and finally played a one-two with Scholes to find an opening, scoring with a long-range shot that breached AC Milan’s goal.”

"It wasn't a counter-attack, it was a positional battle after the counter-attack was disrupted. Dejan single-handedly tore a hole in AC Milan's middle and gave Manchester United the lead with a long-range shot right in front of Maldini."

"Maldini and Baresi must be thinking back to a few years ago, when Dejan never lost a game in Serie A. And even after he moved to the Premier League, he remained an undefeated champion!!!"

Lu Deyang, who scored the goal, was already being held tightly by his teammates.

Those who are slower might not even be able to squeeze in.

This isn't the first time such a scene has happened in a Manchester United match.

Manchester United fans, however, were quite happy to see this happen.

Even the most dedicated fans of local youth training agree that this team is led by Lu Deyang and consists of a group of British players.

Paolo Maldini stood with his hands on his hips, watching the Manchester United players celebrate.

He then patted Desailly on the shoulder and said, "Don't worry about it, that guy's technique is really good, it's not shameful to get beaten by him."

"How should I defend against him next?"

"Desailly asked."

Maldini was finally speechless.

If he had known, he wouldn't have let Lu Deyang be so arrogant.

Long, long ago, when he was a young player earning a meager salary, he met Lu Deyang on the Serie A pitch, and after returning home, he asked Cesare Maldini the same question.

Even his father couldn't provide an answer.

Even after all these years, Paolo Maldini still hasn't figured out the answer.

But he only knew a little bit.

If you try your best, there's still a chance; if you give up, there's no hope at all.

Maldini said with a smile, "Keep it up, there's still plenty of time!"

Seeing that he had such a good attitude, Desailly felt much more relaxed.

“You’re becoming more and more like a leader, Paul.”

Baresi said to Maldini as he returned to his position.

"I will work hard."

Maldini said with a smile.

Even if it's just to fulfill Lu Deyang's claim of "tenth place in the Ballon d'Or," he has to deliver a performance worthy of being on the Ballon d'Or shortlist.

We can't let ourselves become a laughing stock among the fans.

Ferguson watched quietly from the sidelines as everything unfolded on the field.

Irwin is good.

However, if they could acquire Paolo Maldini, Manchester United's defense would be much better.

Sometimes he wondered how Cesare Maldini could have fathered a son.

Among the many superstars in the football world, the most recent one is Jordi Cruyff, who has been promoted to Barcelona's first team.

None of these superstars' children are as outstanding as Paolo Maldini, who is almost on par with his father.

That 28-year-old full-back showed extraordinary talent when he was only 18.

His tackling ability is better than any current Manchester United player.

However, this is something we can only dream about.

Even if AC Milan agrees, the players themselves won't.

I grew up watching my father compete.

Fortunately, Schmeichel's son seems promising; perhaps he could become a goalkeeper for Manchester United in the future.

A goal, and a pretty brilliant one at that.

However, this did not have any impact on AC Milan's morale.

This is the foundation of a wealthy family.

It's also what fans often refer to as the champion's spirit.

Some teams may perform well for a while, but they always fall short at crucial moments.

This situation is unlikely to occur at a powerhouse like AC Milan.

Van Basten restarted the game and passed the ball to Simeone, who immediately passed it back to Van Basten.

This striker, a product of Como's youth academy, played the role of a wingman very well.

Van Basten continued to pass the ball back to his teammates to organize the attack, and ran forward a few steps but did not go too far.

This position allows you to receive passes from your teammates at any time.

Donadoni's footwork is still very delicate. Lu Deyang stretched out his foot to try to trick Donadoni out of his center of gravity, but Donadoni immediately cut the ball forward and tapped it, directly choosing to dribble past the opponent.

Redondo quickly came up to help defend, slowing Donadoni down.

After Lu Deyang chased back, Donadoni decisively passed the ball back.

He had no way to deal with such a combination.

Albertini received the ball and passed it to the left wing, but as soon as Maldini got the ball, Lu Deyang pressed forward again.

Paolo Maldini rolled his eyes at Lu Deyang right in front of him.

He had no confidence in getting past Lu Deyang.

"Paul, how about coming to play for Manchester United?"

Lu Deyang asked.

"Okay!"

Maldini said that while Lu Deyang was in a daze, he flicked the ball forward hard and accelerated past Lu Deyang.

Lu Deyang had just turned around to chase after Maldini when he heard Maldini's voice.

"Just kidding, you idiot..."