1986: My Happy Life in Provence

Chapter 549 Drunk
The wine served at the banquet must be swallowed, not spat out.

Olive oil can form a protective film in the stomach, slowing down the absorption of alcohol.

Theodore's original words were as follows:

Every year he sees countless people making a fool of themselves by getting drunk before and after auctions, and he doesn't want that to happen to Jacques and Ronan today, because then he'll have to find a way to carry them back, and both of them at that.

Ronan and Jacques were more proactive and assertive than Theodore had imagined.

They not only drank the olive oil, but also ate goat milk pudding and Provençal herbs, which can protect the stomach and intestines.

After completing a full set of protective measures, they entered a large hotel called Sofia in Papal New Castle.

Waiters wearing white hats stood on both sides, welcoming the guests. They would do this hundreds of times tonight, as more than 300 people would be attending.

"An event with so many people? Who's the organizer?" Ronan asked Theodore curiously. "Are they the same people from the auction?"

Theodore straightened his tie:
"Of course not. The people at the auction wouldn't be willing to spend so much money on a banquet. Tonight's event is organized by the local winery alliance."

Ronan became even more curious:
"A winery alliance? Is it an organization similar to the Provence Food Alliance?"

Theodore let out a disdainful snort:

"It's much more formal than that one. The alliance organized by Llorente has no membership requirements and is a mixed bag. The Châteauneuf-du-Pape alliance is full of 'elite troops' and it's very difficult to join. Of the more than 300 people here today, at least half of them want to gain membership. Let me put it this way, tonight you can see almost all the famous winery owners or their representatives from Provence here."

Ronan, eager to try, stepped to the front:

"Is that so? Then we might run into one or two 'acquaintances'."

The Châteauneuf-du-Pape winery alliance is very wealthy, and the venues for their banquets are decorated like palaces.

The round vaulted ceiling exudes grandeur, while the walls are adorned with several meters of silk embroidered plants and materials related to wine. Long tables are arranged in a row, with silver tableware on them, and the entire hall sparkles under the lights.

Ronan and his two companions had no connection to the afternoon auction and didn't need to do anything in between. They arrived early, before the dinner was scheduled to begin, so they found a quiet place to sit and chat.

Everything Ronan experienced today was new and exciting.

He's been in Provence for so long, and he's never participated in a large 'dinner' with more than 300 people.

You know, almost everyone present today is an alcoholic. What would it be like to see so many people drinking together?

Jacques and Theodore started talking about a certain vintage wine, but Ronan wasn't very interested and picked up the menu on the table to look at it.

This is quite something!
The menu at the beginning was quite simple, but the wine list was three whole pages long, with an estimated seventy or eighty different wines.

Wait, isn't this a dinner party? Why is it a wine-making event again?
Ronan interrupted the conversation between the two people next to him and pushed the menu out:
"Are we going to drink so many different kinds of alcohol tonight?"

Mr. Jacques flipped through it, and said expressionlessly:
"This year's isn't much; last year's banquet wine list was almost five pages long."

Theodore explained to Ronan:
"The wines served at the dinner were donated by winery owners, wine merchants, foundations and the government. With so many donors, there were a variety of wines. However, we have streamlined the selection this year, leaving only the finest wines."

Having observed the afternoon auction, Ronan was quite familiar with the names of high-end wineries in Provence. The wine list did indeed feature excellent wines, but even the best wines can't withstand such heavy drinking.

“But we can’t throw up tonight,” Ronan said to the two of them in a low voice.

Yesterday, after leaving Jackson's plantation, Ronan and Jacques were unsteady on their feet.

Jacques gave a wry smile:
"Last year, I couldn't vomit even after drinking more than 100 kinds of alcohol; I just toughed it out."

Theodore then pulled some bottles and jars out of his backpack:
"Let's take some precautions. I advise you to be careful. The situation this year is quite serious. They've made money!"

The banquet started more than half an hour later than planned because many people were busy reporting the good news from the auction to their partners or bosses.

During this long wait, Ronan kept his eyes on the direction of the door, hoping to see his 'acquaintance,' but he did not see his fellow Parisian Bernard until the appetizers were served and the waiter began to pour them their first drinks.

Isn't it said that the owners of famous wineries in Provence will all attend?
How could he not be there?
Ronan had originally planned to get to know his fellow Parisians better tonight.

He turned to Theodore, and, on a whim, asked:

Do you know 'Paris Nouveau'? Are they here tonight?

Theodore actually knew the answer:

“The new winegrowers in Paris, of course they know. They don’t interact much with local wine merchants; they’ve formed their own alliance.”

A string of words immediately popped into Ronan's mind:
"A New Era Winery Alliance?"

This alliance was very high-profile at the Gold Land Art event and even competed for Zoe's works. Later, by chance, Ronan learned that the organization was backed by his fellow countrymen.

“That’s right, the New Era Winery Alliance,” Theodore shrugged. “These people are very united, but also very exclusive. Oh, by the way, you’re from Paris too.”

Ronan was about to answer when someone grabbed his neck from behind.

Jackson grabbed Ronan's arm:

"What Parisian? Ronan is now in Papal Newcastle. What are you doing sitting here? Come over here, I'm going to supervise you singing the war song later!"

Ronan turned around and said, both amused and exasperated:

"Shall we not sing tonight?"

Today is a formal dinner, and everyone is dressed to the nines.

The ladies wore exquisite jewelry around their necks, wrists, and fingers, and each wore an expensive evening gown.

The men were all dressed in suits and ties, their hair and beards neatly combed, and the metal buttons on their cuffs sparkled as they made their gestures.

You're telling me to 'la la la' in such a formal setting?
That's not a good idea, buddy!

Jackson grabbed Ronan and started walking, giving Theodore and Jacques a 'follow us' look.

"Child, please remember that everything you see now is only temporary."

And so, Ronan and his two companions followed Jackson to the table where he was.

That's the hardest-hit area tonight.

Farmers are always the most boisterous group, no matter the occasion.

Before even taking two sips of the wine, he was already high.

The good news, however, is that the local winery alliance brought in a resident band tonight, and their music drowned out the raucous shouts coming from Jackson's table.

The band's name is very down-to-earth: 'Happy Pope Newcastle People'.

The four men, dressed in apron-like outfits and adorned with colorful ornaments around their necks, echoed the banquet's theme. Instead of holding musical instruments, they kept their wine glasses in their hands, and the very first song set the tone for the evening.

Ronan didn't catch the title of the first song, and the melody was unfamiliar to him; it was the first time he had ever heard it.

But he was certain the song was an 'original' song by a local, because the lyrics went like this:

"The wind kisses the hillside through the olive grove."

The linen gloves, still carrying the scent of grapes, and three earthenware jars, seemingly drunk, lie scattered before the stone house.
Life isn't complete without wine!
Oh my! Fill this glass to the brim with golden light!
The cicadas chirped and tinkled at the bottom of the cup.

Drink away your worries, drink away your sorrows.
Only the scorching heat of the setting sun remains between my lips and teeth!
Oh my! Lavender has turned into an old travel bag.

Wine stains last longer than love letters.

If you pass by, my eyes will well up with tears.
Don't ask if it's from being drunk or from the overwhelming memories!
Oh dear! The stone steps are weathered and worn, time seems to have slipped away.
Life is like wine, its foam rising and falling, brewing and brewing.
When the moon climbs up the window of the empty wine bottle,

The cellar full of starlight is making a bed for my dreams!

As the last melody ended, the audience erupted in enthusiastic applause and cheers. Before the "Happy Pope Newcastle Man" could even finish blowing a kiss, the thunderous war song began to play.

All social etiquette vanished in that moment and never returned that night.

Ronan had lost count of how many drinks he had had, and how many different kinds of alcohol he had consumed.

All I remember is food coming and going, wine going and coming in, as if it were an endless stream.

All I could see was Jackson and a few middle-aged men jumping and dancing around the dining table, waving something that looked like a tablecloth. The dance they were performing wasn't "The Song of Wine"; they looked more like strippers.

I also saw Mr. Jacques take off his black-rimmed glasses, remove his suit, loosen his tie, and reveal his white chest.

Ronan's self-control gradually disappeared, like the cork on a wine bottle.

Before, he had to drink when others asked him to, but later he started to ask others to drink on his own initiative.

"A toast to the great grape!"

"A toast to tonight's moonlight!"

"To world peace!"

"A toast to any reason that justifies another drink!! Haha—"

Suddenly, a pair of hands covered in ice crystals landed on Ronan's burning hot forehead.

In his blurred vision, he saw Theodore's contorted face:

"Stop fucking toasting me, I can't handle both of you!!"

"Thank you for your help. Please take him to this address and tell the person picking him up to call me as soon as they get him." Ronan leaned against Mr. Jacques' Mercedes and scribbled a string of numbers on a piece of paper. "This is my hotel's phone number. Have them transfer me to room 301."

The 'designated driver' took the piece of paper with a phone number written on it, and at the same time handed another piece of paper to Ronan:
"Okay, don't worry, I will definitely get the person to Bonillo safely. If anything similar happens again, you can contact me again. This is my home number."

Ronan forced a wry smile:
"Hopefully there won't be a next time."

Suddenly, a pale, fleshy body appeared through the back window, and Mr. Jacques, shirtless, shouted through the window:
"Long live France! We are so lucky to live here, surrounded by so many lovely people, so many beautiful buildings, such a lovely countryside, I love it—"

Ronan didn't hear the last few words because the car had already driven far away.

As Ronan watched the taillights disappear around the corner, he turned back and met Theodore's gaze as the car was doing his "arm-swinging exercises."
"Thank you for your help tonight."

If Theodore hadn't pulled him back at the last minute, Ronan might be reciting poetry right now.

The usually mild-mannered Jacques had completely changed his personality after drinking too much; it took a lot of effort to drag him out and put him in the car. Theodore felt like he had just been in a fight.
"Thank God you stayed conscious, otherwise I was really afraid Ines would go back and 'kill' me."

Ronan scratched his head sheepishly:

"The atmosphere was too good, I couldn't control myself."

Theodore nodded and gave the instructions:

"It's understandable that this is your first time here, especially for this type of banquet. Many people need to learn from their mistakes a few times before they 'grow up,' but remember not to do it again tomorrow."

Ronan felt a sudden darkness engulf him and nearly fell over.
"Do we want to drink like this again tomorrow?"

Theodore shrugged:

"Tomorrow's 'situation' will be even more exciting than today's."

Ronan stumbled and ran in the direction Mr. Jacques had left.

Wait for me!
Take me with you!
The night before: The person involved regretted it, deeply regretted it, and said they shouldn't have drunk so much!

The next morning: Hey, good wine is good wine! I woke up feeling perfectly fine after a good night's sleep, and I'm fully recharged!

After Mr. Jacques left, Ronan's only "parent" was Theodore. Worried that Ronan had drunk too much the night before and was not feeling well this morning, he specially made breakfast for Ronan the next morning.

Theodore has a small residence in Châteauneuf-du-Pape, where he, as a sommelier, spends more than half of the year working.

Ronan found the house according to the address, and when he went inside, he found Theodore brewing witch's potion—a pot of dark green, viscous liquid on the stove.

"What are you doing?" Ronan asked in alarm.

Theodore stirred the contents of the pot and said slowly:

"A food that can help you sober up, protect your stomach and intestines, and replenish your energy. I cooked it for over an hour, so drink a couple more bowls later."

Ronan moved closer and smelled at least a dozen different Provençal spices, which made him even more frightened.

"I'm fine, really, I don't feel uncomfortable at all."

Who would drink something with such a strong flavor so early in the morning?

Theodore lowered his head and stirred a small counter-clockwise vortex in the pot:
"But we're still going to drink today, and quite a lot of it."

Ronan raised his right hand:
"I swear I won't make the same mistake twice. I will definitely control the amount today."

In an attempt to persuade the other party, he continued:

"Besides, I have a mission today, so I can't drink too much, or it will cause problems."

Theodore frowned and asked:
"What mission?"

Ronan retreated to the kitchen doorway:
"You said you'd take me to the Châteauneuf-du-Pape Wine Festival today. Lourmarin will definitely host a rosé wine festival in the future. I want to observe and learn a lot to see how they organize it."

Theodore remembered Ines's instructions and took the initiative to introduce Ronan to:

“There are indeed many things I can learn from you. I will tell you about them slowly today. You can also ask me anything you are interested in at any time.”

Ronan nodded:

"Okay, when do we leave?"

Theodore fiddled with it for a while, then placed a bowl of thick, unidentified, flocculent liquid in front of Ronan:
"Let's set off after we finish drinking."

"Pop—" Two dark green bubbles exploded on the surface of the liquid, as if celebrating something.

Ronan nervously swallowed and pressed his back against the wall.

(End of this chapter)