Full House Spring

Chapter 56 Wishful thinking

Xia Li was not joking. She couldn't imagine losing herself for the one she loved.

She felt suffocated at the thought of having to put someone else's interests before her own in the future and belong to that person completely.

If she really gets together with the person she likes in the future, she will pay more attention to her inner feelings and care more about her core interests.

Xia Li doesn't need the other party to sacrifice for her, and she won't do that for the other party. It's enough for the two of them to get along naturally.

Even her biological parents had not given her much love in her previous life, so how could she dare to ask for love without any blood relationship?

When her youth is gone, her reproductive value is gone, and she no longer has the dividends bestowed by the times, she will be lucky to be able to gain a foothold in this world on her own, and she really dare not expect too much from anything else.

Nanny Xie heard her words and did not think it was outrageous. She just said in a low voice: "It's good that you have such an ambition. Getting married can't give you a lifetime of support. No matter if you are a man or a woman, you have to rely on yourself in the end. But if you can give birth to a legitimate bloodline and have a say in the family, your life will not be too bad."

Qiao He drank the wine in the glass in one gulp, and said with a light smile: "I probably can't live a life like this. It's enough for me to learn a solid skill and live a meaningful life."

Xia Li held her chin with one hand, her eyes sparkling, and she said in a very casual manner:

"We don't need to prejudge the future, we can just wait and see. As long as we can make ourselves happy, anything is fine."

Qiao He nodded in agreement and watched the two girls clinking glasses and drinking. Nanny Xie did not spoil their fun or stop them. It was rare for the two of them to be so happy. Her old heart also felt a lot younger.

It was still snowing outside, and from time to time you could hear the noise of children playing and the sound of firecrackers. The sounds were filled with a strong festive atmosphere and made people feel warm.

After eating the New Year's Eve dinner, the three of them sat around the charcoal fire and chatted. It wasn't because they were there to stay up all night, but because they didn't want to go back to their room to rest.

Nanny Xie was talking to the two about old stories in the mansion. They were listening very attentively while cracking melon seeds. Just when they were talking excitedly, there was a knock on the door. Xia Li thought she had misheard, so she stood up and listened carefully. Then a familiar shout came from outside.

"Miss Xia Li, I'm Shihu. I'm here to bring you something on the orders of my master. Please open the door and come out to take a look."

Shihu is the prince's man, and everyone knows this. The prince sent someone to deliver things on New Year's Eve, telling everyone that he is thinking about Xia Li.

Aunt Xie's face immediately darkened, Qiao He was confused, and Xia Li said calmly, "Auntie, don't think too much. I'll explain it to you later."

Aunt Xie was not someone who didn't know her limits. She nodded slightly and said, "Go out and see if he can stop yelling. If someone hears it, they'll think too much."

Xia Li nodded in agreement. Seeing that she was about to go out in her jacket, Qiao He quickly handed her a cloak hanging on the wall and asked her to put it on, even with the hood, and said considerately, "It's snowing hard at night, you have to cover yourself up."

Xia Li had just drunk some wine, so she didn't feel cold at the moment. Her face was flushed, and she said with a smile, "Don't worry, I'm strong and I'll be fine."

She is busy at work on weekdays. If she spends too much time doing needlework, she will practice Ba Duan Jin or yoga in the house at night to strengthen her body. Generally speaking, her physique is still good.

Xia Li walked out wrapped in a cloak, and Qiao He followed her and closed the door of the main room. She did not look around curiously, because if there was anything, Xia Li would tell them when she came back.

The snow outside had lightened, but the wind was still biting. As soon as Xia Lifu went out, she shivered in the cold wind. She wrapped her cloak tightly, walked to the gate of the courtyard with one foot deep and one foot shallow, opened the door and smiled softly, "Brother Shihu, why are you here so late to deliver something? It won't be too late to come tomorrow..."

Before she finished her words, she looked up and met Lu Lingchuan's burning gaze. Xia Li felt uncomfortable for a moment, and she pretended to be calm and said, "I am here to pay my respects to the prince. The mansion is staying up tonight to celebrate the New Year. Why did you come here in person?"

Lu Lingchuan didn't know why he was so out of line. At the family dinner, he ate the Buddha Jumps Over the Wall prepared by Chef Cao and found it delicious. He wanted Xia Li to have a taste of it as well. Originally, he could have controlled himself rationally if they were all at the same table. But when he went back to his room to change clothes, he found out that Xia Li had taken a leave and had not been home for several days. He felt uneasy and had to see her in person.

The back alley was not far away, so Lu Lingchuan found an excuse to come over. Shi Hu touched his nose and said tactfully, "Sir, you and Miss Xia Li can go inside to chat. It's windy outside, so I'll take the food inside first."

After saying that, he ran away like the wind, leaving the two of them staring at each other. Lu Lingchuan rarely showed a reserved expression. He asked carefully, "Would it be convenient for you to come in and sit down?"

Xia Li smiled and said calmly, "Grandma and Qiao He are both inside. It's no big deal. If you don't mind, I'll take you to the tea room to sit down."

Although the house is small, its layout is well-organized. The tea room was decorated by Xia Li himself. It is so pleasant to sit inside in the winter, put a charcoal basin, boil tea and enjoy the snow.

Lu Lingchuan was very happy to see her. He said gently, "This courtyard is so exquisite, how could I dislike it? You lead the way."

After closing the courtyard gate, the two of them went straight to the tea room. Nanny Xie and Qiao He did not come out to disturb them. Because it was New Year's Eve, every room was brightly lit with candles. There was a charcoal basin ready in the tea room, so they felt warm as soon as they went in.

With the candlelight shining, Lu Lingchuan could see Xia Li's cheeks were lightly pink, and he could smell the aroma of wine. He chuckled and said, "Did you drink today?"

Xia Li's eyes were sparkling with tipsy stars, and she said in a hoarse voice: "I drank a few sips with grandma and the others, but I didn't drink too much, so it shouldn't be considered out of line."

It was as if the alcohol gave her courage, and in this tipsy moment, she became freer.

Lu Lingchuan was keenly aware of this subtle change. He curved his lips slightly and said in a soothing voice, "You have always followed the rules. How could you do something out of line..."

Xia Li was brewing tea skillfully. Hearing this, she looked up at him and slightly opened her lips.

"Your Highness, what you said is not true. I am free and easy-going by nature, and I have nothing to do with following rules. It seems that you have never really understood me."

Her slightly opened lips were as crystal clear as a honey-colored grapefruit, which made Lu Lingchuan lose his mind. The crackling sound of the charcoal fire boiling tea brought him back to his senses. He said in a low voice:

"We have a long life to get to know each other slowly. In my eyes, you will always be unique."

During the conversation, the tea stove was already steaming, and a faint tea fragrance was spreading. Xia Li looked drowsy. She couldn't understand Lu Lingchuan's eagerness to see her. Thinking that she would have to explain to grandma later, she couldn't help but feel a little annoyed. She frowned and said helplessly:

"My Lord, do you know how much trouble your behavior today will bring me?" Lu Lingchuan's expression became complicated, and he said in a gentle voice:

"I was indeed a little abrupt. I only considered my own feelings and didn't think about you. I'm sorry..."

Xia Li rubbed his forehead and sighed:

"Don't let anyone else know about this, and don't do this again in the future. You should focus on Miss Gao. She is well-read, outstanding, and a very cultured girl. Don't let her down."

Lu Lingchuan's eyes were empty and lost. He wanted to say something, but when he met Xia Li's eyes that showed neither sadness nor joy, the words were unable to come out.

Xia Li gently lifted the teapot and slowly tilted it. The tea flowed out smoothly and the warm tea fragrance filled the air. Watching her subtle movements, Lu Lingchuan's heart gradually calmed down.

He reached out and picked up the teacup, took a sip, and said calmly:
"If anyone asks, just say I came to discuss Zhao Xiaohui's matter with you. No need to explain anything else."

After that, he put down his teacup and stood up. Xia Li met his deep eyes and seemed relieved. She curled her lips and said lightly, "I'll remember it."

Lu Lingchuan looked at her intently, his eyes were gentle and his expression was calm, and he finally sighed: "The mansion is still waiting for me to go back and stay up until the New Year, so I'm leaving now..."

He walked out with steady steps, each step full of power, as if he was eager to transform the burning feelings in his heart into reality.

Xia Li continued to sip her tea. She heard Shi Hu quicken his pace to catch up with Lu Lingchuan, muttering about holding an umbrella for him. She also heard Grandma and Qiao He come out to see them off, and the creaking sound of the courtyard door closing. Everything was so clear...

After seeing the prince off, Nanny Xie did not return to the main hall, but walked towards the tea room. Qiao He tactfully avoided her question. There are some things that she is better not to know.

The door curtain was lifted, and seeing grandma's solemn face, Xia Li pursed her lips and smiled. She said calmly: "Grandma, don't be upset. The prince and I have no private feelings."

Although Aunt Xie had never experienced love, she had seen too much. She frowned and said:
"Today is New Year's Eve. The prince has a decent personality. If there is no special reason, why would he specially send you food? How long do you want to hide it from me?"

Aunt Xie was obviously furious. Xia Li hurried forward and touched her chest, whispering, "Auntie, don't worry. I have never thought of marrying up. The prince is the hope of the entire Duke's Mansion. How could I be so foolish as to have such a deep love for him? He is just young and admires me. He thinks I am different from other maids, so he is attracted to me."

Aunt Xie said sternly, "You mean the prince has feelings for you? How did you deal with it?"

Xia Li said calmly, "I have clearly rejected him. I don't even want the position of concubine he promised me. I just want to leave the house and live a free life."

Madam Xie's facial lines softened a bit, and she said calmly:

"I'm glad you're so insightful. You also know that the prince is discussing marriage with Miss Gao. With her family background, how could she agree to make you a concubine? Even if the prince insists and you take the position reluctantly, there will definitely be a life-and-death struggle in the backyard."

Xia Li raised her hand to pour a cup of tea for Grandma, and said leisurely: "I won't become hideous for a man, even if he is the prince."

Seeing that she didn't seem to mind at all, Aunt Xie believed her words. She picked up the teacup, drank a sip of water to moisten her throat, and then said:

"If it really comes to that, you have to fight for it. If you take a step back, you will be doomed. By then, you will have children, so don't you want to fight for your children?"

Xia Li's expression was serious, and his eyes were cold as he said, "These assumptions will never happen to me. I will never be a concubine in my life."

Madam Xie showed a satisfied look on her face. Her eyes were deep as she murmured, "In the future, you should stay away from the prince. If you can avoid meeting him, then don't meet him. He is well-behaved and will obey your wishes. No one should know about what happened tonight. In the future, as long as you don't act out of line and no one can find fault with you, this matter will be forgotten."

At this critical juncture, if something really happened, the eldest lady might misunderstand that she wanted to sabotage the prince's marriage proposal, and then she would be sold out out of anger, and she would have no place to cry.

Xia Li knew her own limitations. Although she had some abilities that won the old lady's favor, she was not irreplaceable. She could not even compare to a hair of the young master. If she really hindered the young master's good marriage, she was afraid that even her grandmother's face would not be saved.

While the grandparents and grandchildren were talking to each other heart to heart, Lu Lingchuan was walking at night in the wind and snow, and the pain in his heart was rolling like waves. There were some things that he knew were impossible to do, but he could never let go.

Shihu followed behind the prince and felt that the low pressure from him was suffocating. The master and servant entered the mansion through the corner door in the backyard. Except for the servants and guards guarding the gate, there was no other figure along the way.

As soon as the two of them entered Linfeng Residence, they were caught by Lu Qinghe who had been waiting for a long time. She raised her chin slightly, a playful smile appeared on her lips, and she was not afraid of Lu Lingchuan's cold face. She said leisurely: "Brother, where did you go just now?"

Lu Lingchuan's fluctuating emotions had been smoothed out by the wind and snow. He frowned slightly and said, "I'm going to the outer study to handle official business. What are you doing here?"

Lu Qinghe stared at Lu Lingchuan with sharp eyes and said loudly:
"You're lying! I saw you carrying a lunch box out with my own eyes. Could it be that you brought midnight snacks with you to work?"

Lu Lingchuan took off his cloak and said indifferently, "There is a rule in the mansion that you cannot bring food to the study to handle official business?"

Lu Qinghe raised his eyebrows slightly, walked to his side and sat down, and continued:
"I asked my personal maid to check the outer study. Although the lights were on, no one answered the door when I knocked. Then I sent someone to ask the gatekeeper, and he said that the prince had left the house with the food box. You didn't ride a horse or a carriage, and you came back only half an hour after leaving the house. You also went out through the corner door in the backyard, so you must have gone to the back alley. So, who did you go to see?"

Lu Lingchuan sat on the armchair and raised his hand to signal Shihu to leave, and then said calmly: "Since you know everything, why bother asking me again."

Lu Qinghe was hesitant for a moment, but soon she bent down with a sneer, and said in a brisk voice: "You went to see Xia Li, right? The Buddha Jumps Over the Wall was also given to her. I really didn't expect that brother is such a lovesick man. It's not a disgrace to like Xia Li. Are you planning to marry Sister Gao and then give her a status?"

Lu Lingchuan's breathing stagnated slightly, and he said in a deep voice: "Don't talk nonsense, this is not the case at all."

Lu Qinghe's eyes widened slightly, and a hint of surprise flashed in his pupils.

"Brother, there's no need to hide it. I won't tell anyone about this, and mother will keep it a secret for you."

Lu Lingchuan's lips trembled. He tried his best to suppress some strong emotions and said in a hoarse voice, "This is just my wishful thinking. Telling it to others will damage her reputation. Don't mention it again in the future. You have been waiting for such a long time, you must have something to ask for. You might as well tell me directly."

(End of this chapter)