Tokyo: Rabbit Police and Her Evil Partner

Chapter 550 The Baka Theory (Bonus Chapter)

Fushimi Shika demanded the original letter and the sender's information, but the newspaper's clerk initially refused. However, Fushimi Shika raised the price and bought it for 500,000 yen.

The transaction went very smoothly without any unexpected problems. After six days and five nights, and spending 500,000 yen plus taxi fares, the two finally found information about the culprit.

"Wait, isn't this..."

Minamoto no Tamako stared at the address on the letter, then turned to look at Fushimi Shika.

Fushimi Shika noticed the letter the moment he received it, and nodded in response, saying, "Yes, that's right, it's right across from our new house."

They were professional criminal investigators, and with key clues, they uncovered the truth of the matter almost effortlessly.

The letter was sent to the convenience store in front of the new house, and the sender was a female clerk at the convenience store.

Just because a female convenience store clerk wrote a letter of whistleblowing, accompanied by photos that were unsubstantiated and distorted, Minamoto Tamako's life was almost ruined.

The reason she was still able to investigate with full energy was mainly because of Fushimi Shika and Hira Sakurako. They hung up all the harassing phone calls, burned all the threatening letters, and drove away all the reporters who tried to interview her, creating an information cocoon for Minamoto Tamako.

This was in an era when social media wasn't as prevalent; in another ten or twenty years, its impact on public opinion would likely increase a hundredfold.

As planned, Minamoto no Tamako sued the female shop assistant.

The police finally opened a case and investigated, and found out what happened.

The female clerk's name is Kikuchi Shika. She is nineteen years old, lives alone, and is unmarried. While working at the convenience store, she met Minamoto Tamako, who had recently been in the news. She enjoys reading related news, but I won't go into the specifics.

In short, she noticed that Gentaka lived in a mansion, drove luxury cars, and didn't have to go to work despite being a detective, so she concluded that Gentaka's money was ill-gotten.

As a taxpayer, she felt obligated to report such parasites.

At first, Minamoto no Tamako was puzzled, but then she expressed her understanding, believing that Kikuchi Shika was also trying to uphold justice and had accidentally misunderstood her.

Under Fushimi Shika's disapproving gaze, Minamoto no Tamako sat opposite Kikuchi Shika and earnestly explained the misunderstandings, such as where the house came from, where the car came from, who the eight or nine-year-old girl was, and who the man she was living with was...

In short, she explained everything clearly, and only made one request to Kikuchi Shika:
"As long as you apologize, let's let this matter go. You meant well and made a mistake by accident, so I won't pursue it too much."

Fushimi Shika swore to the heavens—these were Minamoto no Tamako's exact words, and she truly believed it from the bottom of her heart.

But Kikuchi Shika refused.

Shika Kikuchi not only refused, but also claimed that Tamako Minamoto humiliated her and subjected her to torture to extract a confession. She also called a public interest lawyer—she couldn't afford a private lawyer—to sue the Sugamo Metropolitan Police Department for detaining her without her consent.

Yuan Yuzi felt completely bewildered. She sat down next to the apartment lawyer and asked with a puzzled look, "All I want is an apology. I did do something wrong. Is it that hard to apologize?"

"Look! She's humiliating me again! She's launching a personal attack on me! She—she—does having money make her so great? Does having money mean she can do whatever she wants?!" Kikuchi Shika cried out, "You're all bullying me! What did I do wrong?!"

"What?" Minamoto no Tamako was starting to doubt herself. She turned to Fushimi Shika and asked, "Was my tone harsh?"

Fushimi Shika had to pull Minamoto Tamako out of the interrogation room, and he struggled to describe the situation. The two sat on chairs in the aisle, and after a moment's thought, Fushimi Shika tried to explain in simple terms: "As you know, I used to be a lawyer..."

"Actually, I still find it a little hard to believe."

Gen Tamako scratched her head. She wasn't really angry; the culprit had been caught, and the other party had acted kindly. She just found Kikuchi Shika's personality a bit inexplicable: "I was talking about your past... but it's not that I completely disbelieve you, you understand? It's more like a feeling of half-belief, half-doubt." "Yes, but we've gone off-topic, it's not important," Fushimi Shika steered the conversation back on track: "What I wanted to say was that I started as a junior lawyer, so I handled a lot of small cases..."

"Similar to the case of Mutsuko Sakai murdering her husband?" Minamoto Tamako asked, drawing inferences from one instance to another.

“Pretty much,” Fushimi Shika gave examples: “For instance, drugging a male model to the point of disability, being caught cheating on your mother-in-law, recharging 5 yen only to be asked for a refund by a legitimate massage parlor, arranging for three girlfriends to prostitute themselves while they solicited customers…”

He paused, then concluded, "You need to understand, the whole world is made up of idiots, everyone in the world is an idiot."

The Japanese translation of this passage is 'Baka Yashiro', and 'Baka Yashiro' will be used to refer to that word from now on.

Gen Tamako was a little confused: "Then aren't you just insulting yourself?"

“I have a set of 'baka' theories that can cover everyone, including you and me.” Fushimi Shika patted his chest and said, “That’s right, I’m a 'baka' too.”

"Huh?" Yuan Yuzi reached out and pressed her ahoge down.

Fushimi Shika began to instill his baka theory: "There are only three kinds of people in the world: good baka, evil baka, and chaotic baka."

"First of all, you're a kind idiot. Everyone in the world is a unique individual. Differences will lead to clashes. As long as you express your opinions, it will cause controversy and you'll be seen as an idiot by others."

"But it doesn't matter. As the saying goes, harmony without uniformity, seeking common ground while reserving differences. As long as the debate doesn't turn into a quarrel, and they still uphold simple morality and have a high level of understanding, then they are kind-hearted bastards."

"Next up are the evil bastards. Their values ​​are warped. They like to seize by trickery and plunder, seek attention and plunder, have a strong sense of vanity, and often harm others for their own benefit."

"These kinds of people are what society perceives as 'petty people' or 'bad people.' They have brains, but they do bad things for their own benefit, so they are evil bastards."

"Finally, there's Chaos Baka, these kinds of people have no values."

Fushimi Shika paused, then emphasized, "Do you understand? Their heads are empty. They are mentally challenged people pretending to be normal, just like Kazama Senhime, who is a violent maniac pretending to be normal."

"Because of their poor cognitive abilities, they cannot distinguish between right and wrong, often harming others without benefiting themselves, and doing good deeds that backfire. When faced with criticism, they do not reflect on what they did wrong; they only think, 'I was clearly trying to be kind, why are you bullying me...'"

"For example, elderly people in rural areas might force their underage daughters to marry, believing they are doing it for their daughters' happiness; another example is full-time housewives who help their husbands invest in luxury goods, and even if they lose money, they believe they are managing their husbands' finances..."

"Do you understand? Chaos bastards are unpredictable!"

Fushimi Shika finally laid out his central argument, pulling out a poop-flavored chocolate from his pocket: "They're like this stuff. If you argue with a chaotic baka like that, it's like trying to taste chocolate in poop-flavored chocolate. In the end, you won't taste anything, and all you'll be left with is a mouthful of poop."

Gen Tamako understood, and she loudly objected: "No! Right is right, and wrong is wrong. I just want an apology! You're wrong this time. Even if Kikuchi Shika tries to back out, the judge will definitely side with me!"

However, it turned out that Fushimi Shika was right.

A week later, the case went to trial. After some less heated debate, the judge delivered the following verdict:
—Yuan Yuzi compensates Kikuchi Shika with 10,000 yen as compensation for Kikuchi Shika's emotional distress.

The reason is nothing more than humanitarian concern.

Genji Tamako comes from a well-off family and belongs to the upper class; Kikuchi Shika is a salaried worker and suffered from depression as a result, attempting to cut her wrists multiple times in detention... After reading the interrogation records, the judge felt that Genji Tamako was being unreasonable, so he made this judgment.

When Minamoto Tamako received the verdict, it felt like she had eaten a chocolate that tasted like shit.

(End of this chapter)