[Football] Bad Boy Batty

"Who were you calling just now, Neymar?" Qiao Lin handed Batistuta the unopened milk tea and winked at him, "How far have you come now? What about the guy whose photo you showed me last time, the one who looks like the protagonist of The Adventures of Tintin, how is he doing?"

"It's all fine." Batty took a sip of milk tea and replied, "I lost control a few times, but I pulled myself back in the end."

Qiao Lin looked at him with a smile.

"Keep going. I'm waiting to hear some explosive news."

"...No." Batty rolled his eyes slightly, then changed the subject directly, "I followed your bili account, how many fans do you have now?"

"5." Qiao Lin continued to laugh, "Don't struggle, Barty. We all know that you can't help but tell me the stories in your fish pond, and I also need your information. You have to ship CP at least a little bit, right?"

Batty gave a confusing reply using a few nasal sounds.

Qiao Lin was right about this matter. He liked to share his emotional matters with her. After all, Niu Qiu wouldn't understand all this mess if he told it to him.

"So - what CPs do you like?" he asked. "Tell me, maybe I can give you some details. You call it candy."

"There are a lot, Rose, Pishui, MSN triangle, Neymar, Guam, Guapi (Guam and Bati), White Moonlight Group (Kun and Bati), and BBB center. You look more aggressive in the video than in real life." Qiao Lin counted on her fingers with increasing excitement. "Life is lonely like snow. Only my CP's sweetness can warm my heart."

Batty didn't understand any of the couple names, but he was too lazy to ask. Maybe there was some strange couple that would shatter his worldview.

"Since you like to ship so much, why don't you come with me to England and I'll take you to get up close and personal with your partners," said Batty.

Qiao Lin was stunned for a moment, then shook her head, "I'm doing fine here. I can't make money, but I can still survive."

"Listen to what you're saying. As long as you don't starve to death, that's fine." Batty shook his head in disdain. "Honestly, Joe, come with me to England. Loach is here too. Let's do it like when we were little."

Qiao Lin was a little tempted, but still shook her head, "I'm doing really well here, you don't need to worry about me. If I wasn't, my dad wouldn't let me stay here."

"So what are you doing now?" Batty was almost done with his milk tea. He opened the lid and ate the last bit of the herbal jelly. "History? Art?"

"Neither. I'm working on my own media, shooting short videos, doing live broadcasts, and making some game guides." Qiao Lin had just finished her milk tea. She took out her phone to show Batty, "This is the game I got into last year. It's very popular recently. Wait for me to go throw away some garbage."

Li Qiaolin threw the phone to Batty, then took their empty milk tea cups and threw them into a trash can not far away. When she returned, she saw a scene that made her heart and lungs stop.

"Ahhhhhh Batty! Those are the blue tickets I prepared for the anniversary celebration! If you draw them now, what will I do then-- Shit! I drew an SSR alone!"

"Sorry, I accidentally touched it." Batty said, "I also saw the introduction on YouTube. This is a pay-to-win game, right? You can spend money to get the full configuration."

Qiao Lin, who had not yet recovered from the golden light of the SSR, was immediately covered in the face by the aura of the krypton man.

"No, you, this, hiss - damn European." She took her phone from Batty with a complicated expression, solemnly and reverently, "It's not a matter of krypton gold, this account must be good. I have only one SSR since the server was opened. How come it becomes so lucky in your hands?"

What European? He is from Brazil, a South American.

"Come on, I won't save any more, you help me draw the rest." Before Batty could say anything, Qiao Lin handed him the phone, "See this blue talisman? Just draw something on it."

Batty raised an eyebrow and wrote his name on the other person's phone screen.

Then he saw Li Qiaolin's expression change from surprise to shock, then to disbelief, and finally to gray.

"What's wrong."

"You European." Qiao Lin looked at him weakly, then sighed and opened another game. "This is the video I've been making recently. A new character just entered the card pool a few days ago. I saved up 100 stones but failed. I originally planned to force her to marry, but... Anyway, you come and try."

Batti cooperated and slid the screen according to the other party's request. Then a golden light flashed and Qiaolin's jaw dropped to the ground.

"Another single draw? Damn it! Why am I so angry! He's obviously the more evil one!"

The punk girl couldn't help but curse in beautiful Chinese. Then she looked at Batti, whom she regarded as her best friend, with eyes full of resentment. Suddenly, she had an idea. She looked at Ramses II (also a game character) who had just been drawn on the screen and decided to make good use of the European next to her to earn some traffic.

"Hey, Buddy, I have an idea." Qiao Lin cleared her throat, "I know you have a lot of money and can be a kryptonian, but compared to that, I need your help in other ways."

Batty narrowed his eyes. This guy would only call him 'baby' when he was causing trouble.

"What help do you need? Tell me first." He answered cautiously.

Li Qiaolin raised her phone and pointed at the characters above: "Don't you think you look alike? You both have beautiful honey-colored skin."

Batty: So?

"So!" She smiled brilliantly, "Young man, have you heard of cosplay?"

……

Far away on the other side of the ocean, De Bruyne was looking at the news in the Manchester City group with depression. His teammates were discussing enthusiastically about Batistuta taking Neymar to participate in the World Youth Championship.

He admitted that he was just jealous.

Why does that guy always get more attention? Is it just because he knew Batty a few months earlier than him?

Looking at the photos posted by Jesus that were captured by the media showing Batistuta and Neymar laughing together in front of the hotel, his gaze almost burned through the screen.

When the new season starts, he must——

At this moment, Sterling's long string of screaming emojis flooded their chat group, interrupting De Bruyne's inner determination.

Sterling
Look! ! Barty is live! And he's rubbing the edge! ! ! !

Sterling
[Screenshot - Batty takes off his shirt]
[Screenshot - A hand is painting gold on Batty]
[Screenshot: Batty is wearing earrings and other jewelry]

kun10
? ? ? ?
kun10
What is he doing?
Sterling
It seems like he is cosplaying some game character, but I’m not sure.
He started a live broadcast in China, and someone moved it to YouTube to broadcast it simultaneously, which was a big deal.

kun10
Link, I'll check it out.
Sterling
【YouTube live link】

De Bruyne was watching his teammates discussing enthusiastically and couldn't help but click on the link to watch. As his finger touched the link, a video call came in. It was Batistuta, who was broadcasting live.

The Belgian midfielder subconsciously pressed the green button. When he saw the situation on the opposite side clearly, he felt all the blood in his body rushing to his head.

"Hey, Kevin, you'd never guess what I'm doing - take a look, what do you think?"

The boy wore a dark wig, golden contact lenses, golden pendants on his ears, and a black sleeveless bodysuit that looked worse than nothing.

"The costume Qiaolin prepared for me is the friend I told you about last time - say hello to Kevin." The punk girl waved at the camera and continued to live broadcast. Batty turned the camera back to himself, "It might be better if my muscles were more obvious. There is also a matching costume. I also tried it, but the character has white skin. Qiaolin calls him Jin Shanshan... Do you like it? If you like it, I will take both sets back and we will wear them together on Halloween."

De Bruyne felt dizzy from head to toe.

Batty is live.

Batty called him during the live broadcast.

Batty asked him in front of the whole world if he liked him.

Then he heard himself say—

"Okay, let's wear them together."

……

Soon, it was mid-August. Although the transfer window had not yet closed and clubs were still working hard to buy and sell players, the new season was approaching.

As early as last month, the new Premier League season schedule was fully released. Guardiola added all the game schedules on a calendar (electronically) and distributed it to the players. In the first round, they will face the newly promoted Brighton.

Eight days before the opening game, Batistuta returned to the training ground. Considering that he also participated in the World Youth Championship during the summer break, Guardiola gave him a week's vacation.

He had come for a pre-season physical a few days ago. Now the results are out, and it's not hard to tell from the tone of Alandes when he informed him that the results are not very ideal.

"How did you lose not only 20 pound but 1 pounds after stopping training and eating, drinking and having fun for more than 4 days?" The assistant scientist's fingers trembled slightly as he held the report. He looked at Batty in disbelief. "What a hell, what's your secret? Tell me now, I'll sell it to movie stars and make a lot of money."

Batistuta shrugged. He has always had this amazing physique. His assistant coach was shocked when he was at Santos before. He was taken for various tests, but no scientific explanation was found in the end.

"Except for weight, are other indicators okay?" he asked.

"No." Alandez still had that amazed expression. He stretched out his hand and flicked the report twice. "To be honest, you are in the best condition among all of them. Of course, your thigh muscles are still a little tired. You haven't recovered to your best condition after the World Youth Championship."

"But I feel fine," Batty said. "Your machine is broken."

"Impossible. The machine can't have any problems. If it says your muscles haven't recovered, then you definitely haven't." Arandez waved his hand. "But I didn't say I wouldn't approve your report. You can play, no problem. Just pay attention to some rotation issues."

Speaking of rotation, Batistuta suddenly remembered that his substitute Iheanacho last season had transferred to Leicester City. Manchester City did not make any new signings in his position, but there were new players joining the midfield.

Bernardo Silva, B Silva, the Portuguese who had an argument with him on the field last season, transferred to Manchester City this season.

In addition to him, Manchester City sent away four veterans over 4 years old this summer, including Kolarov, Zabaleta, Sagna, and Clichy. Of course, the main reason is that their competitive level has declined. Also over 30 years old is captain Kompany. Kompany who can stay healthy is still the world's top central defender. Stones and Otamendi in the same position also performed steadily at the end of the season.

"Have you met our new player, Alan?" Batistuta asked. "How does it feel?"

"I've seen some, but not all. I'm in charge of the defenders. I've talked to Kyle Walker and Danilo. They're pretty good." Alandes stopped packing his things, licked the corner of his mouth as if thinking, and then spoke cautiously, "Walker is really fast. I feel like you might have to give way to him."

Ok?
Hearing this, Batty, who was about to ask about Ederson's situation, immediately changed the subject.

"What do you mean?" he asked. "Did you hear that from Pep?"

Batistuta knew Kyle Walker, the right-back from Tottenham, and he had a deep impression of him. Last season, they were defeated both at home and away by Tottenham, and he contributed partly to that.

"We didn't get a home and away double win. The score in the second leg at Etihad Stadium was 1-1." Alandes heard Batistuta muttering, and he emphasized objectively, "One loss and one draw, it doesn't count as a double win."

"It's a double kill for me." Batistuta said with a sneer. He did not play in the second leg at Etihad because he was suspended by Guardiola, a game they could have won.

The scientific officer shook his head helplessly. After a year of getting along with each other, he almost understood Batistuta's way of thinking. A draw was considered a loss and there was nothing to worry about.

After saying goodbye to Alandes, Batistuta contacted his assistant coach. According to the scientific training advice, he had to do warm-up and resistance training outdoors before returning to indoors for special training tomorrow. This meant that he missed out on other teammates. He was the only one in Manchester City who went to the World Youth Championship, so he had to keep the assistant coach company in the next few days of training.

However, after arriving at the outdoor training ground, Batty discovered that there was another player training outdoors with him, and he was——

"Hey! Long time no see, Batistuta!" The goalkeeper that Manchester City spent 3500 million pounds to bring in from Benfica was wearing a green training suit and opened his arms to Batistuta like a big watermelon. "Want a hug?"

Batty ran toward him, then jumped up and gave him a passionate tree hug.

If we talk about the most capable player in Manchester City's lineup right now, it must be Batistuta. This is also due to the new tradition formed in the first half of last season. No matter who scores the goal, they must pick up Batistuta so that their good luck can continue.

But after the enthusiasm comes the ruthless beating.

Because this was the first time Batistuta met Ederson after learning of his transfer to Manchester City.

"Why didn't you call me in advance? I told you I could provide the help you needed." Batty jumped down, then went to the back and gave Ederson a not-too-heavy chokehold. "Now? It's too late."

Ederson cooperated very well and pretended to be out of breath. He patted Batistuta's arm and begged for mercy, then turned to him and gave him a somewhat honest smile.

"I just want to give you a surprise, Barty," he said. "I'm still staying in the hotel. If possible, do you have a suitable apartment downstairs that you can rent to me?"

Batty raised his chin: "Didn't you listen to me? It's too late."

"No - Batty, don't do this to me!" Edson grabbed the clothes on his chest exaggeratedly and acted in pain. "Please, I just want to give you a surprise. Give me another chance. I just need to sleep under your feet. Give me a blanket is enough."

In fact, Ederson was a little bit unbelievable in his heart that he could play with Batistuta like this.

In the Brazilian Olympic team, Neymar was at the horizon, while Batistuta was above the clouds. This was the conclusion reached by him, his then-roommate Marquinhos and several other players.

But now, he is no longer the person who had no say in the locker room. Guardiola promised him a starting position in the new season. At least in the league, he and Batistuta are the main players of the championship team.

Maybe it wasn't his fault, Edson thought.

The starting point of everything can be traced back to that training session, when it was Batty who took the initiative to partner with him.

So it wasn't that he did something to make Batty let down his guard against him, but that Batty took the initiative to show his true self to him and invited him into his circle.

In the past season, they talked 2-3 times a week. At first, he couldn't believe it, but when they got to know each other better and attended last year's Christmas party, Ederson gradually realized that Batistuta was not as arrogant, cold, and arrogant as he seemed (really?).
Ederson thanked Batty from the bottom of his heart.

"As long as you don't talk to me in such a disgusting tone again, I can consider giving you the house from last time." Batistuta knocked on his head again, "You don't need to pay rent, just be a good goalkeeper. Consider it my transfer gift to you."

"Really? Transfer gift - Oh! You are so nice to me! Thank you Batty!"

"I told you not to use such a disgusting tone. If you say one more punctuation mark, I will take the house back."

Looking at Batistuta and Ederson playing and fooling around as if no one was around, the two assistant coaches in charge of them smiled with satisfaction at the same time.

As long as the atmosphere in the team is happy, they have already won half the battle this season.

"By the way, Batistuta, have you met Bernardo?" Ederson stopped to ask after the warm-up run. His expression was a little strange, as if he was holding back a laugh. "Or, did you receive any strange news before meeting him?"

Batty narrowed his eyes, then looked Ederson up and down.

"what do you want to say?"

"Nothing, just tell me if you've met him. I met that guy in Benfica's youth training, but we never played together. When I was loaned back to play for Benfica's first team, he went to Monaco." Ederson didn't want to answer yet, he rubbed his nose, "Bernardo often speaks without thinking, and he's always laughing foolishly. It makes people want to hit him."

Batty: So?

"I saw you and him had a quarrel in the Champions League last season. This season we both came to Manchester City, so I thought of a good idea to play a trick on him." Ederson let out a mischievous smile and hooked his finger at Batistuta to signal him to come closer. "Before coming here, he asked me if I knew anything about Manchester. He came here alone and was quite lonely except for training and games at the club. So I told him that I know a girl, a Brazilian, who lives in Manchester now. The most important thing is that she is single, so you can talk to her and get to know her."

Manchester City's new goalkeeper pursed his lips to prevent himself from laughing. After a pause, he looked at Batistuta.

"I gave him your number."

Batty: ...Poof!

"It's cliché, Ederson. People in the last century only played this." Batty raised his eyes and looked back. "But I have to say, you have successfully aroused my interest."

"I knew you'd be interested." Edson winked at him. "Let me make it clear first, our teasing has a bottom line. We won't play the game of emotional cheating. That's too sad. So, you have to be more proactive and bold. You have to appear impatient and ask him out after just a few words."

Oh, poor Bernardo.

The angel in Batty's heart sighed for the other party with great sincerity, and then the devil holding a fork occupied the high ground of thought.

"Okay, I can help you with that." He raised his lip, "But it's easy to be discovered. As long as one of your teammates tells him my number, you'll be exposed."

"No," Ederson assured Batistuta, patting his chest. "I've already told everyone. Except for the captain who raised a little objection, it was almost unanimous."

After thinking for a moment, he added, "The master also knows that he only asks me not to play too much and hurt Bernardo's feelings."

Everything is ready.

Batty rolled his eyes.

"I think we should make this seem more real." He cleared his throat. "How about giving him a photo?"

"You mean the internet pictures?"

"That's easy to see through." Batistuta smiled, then went to the sidelines and took out his mobile phone. He opened the album and found a photo of himself lying on the bed with half his eyes half closed (taken by De Bruyne), "This one is pretty good."

Edson showed an embarrassed expression: "It's too obvious that it's you."

"Yes, but with just a little bit of modification—" Batty said as he opened an app that Qiao Lin had introduced to him when they were on vacation in China, and activated the one-click beauty function. "Come, experience the mysterious power from the East."

Edson looked at the beautiful woman who suddenly appeared in the photo with a face full of shock. He was stunned for a long time before he slowly gave a thumbs up.

Not to mention Bernardo, even he, who knew that the person in the photo was Batistuta, had his heart skip a beat the moment he saw it.

"I'm sorry, Bernardo." Batistuta smiled like a Mona Lisa. "Who told you to quarrel with me last season?"

Edson secretly glanced at the boy next to him who was smiling smugly.

Suddenly I felt a little jealous of Bernardo.

(End of this chapter)