[Football] Bad Boy Batty

【forum】

133L
Hahahaha brothers, did you watch the live broadcast? Neymar made me laugh to death
134L
I can't see, what happened?

135L
BBB held a party at home, teamed up with Cristiano Ronaldo to play table football, then Neymar intervened. I didn't go, I asked someone to bring a computer to go.
136L
Dancing through the internet cable, right?
137L
I don't understand, let me show you a picture
[Neymar's face appears on the screen.jpg]
[Bati took the computer and laughed until his stomach hurt.jpg]

138L
Hahahaha it looks like Sheldon, I forgot which episode, he made a robot to replace himself, Neymar is exactly the same

139L
Season 4, Episode 2, You're Welcome

……

Not only netizens think Neymar is funny, Batistuta thinks so too.

And considering that this thing was aimed at him, the visual impact was several times greater than that of the onlookers - in the middle of a noisy party, Neymar's face appeared on the laptop screen, and a postman was holding it. The whole picture had an indescribable absurd humor.

It's like being trapped inside the computer or becoming one with it.

Neymar on the screen was still angry, but Batistuta was so amused by his behavior that he couldn't stop laughing.

How could someone appear in such a weird way? Who does he think he is? Sheldon from "The Big Bang Theory"?
"Can I, can I take it away?" After laughing for a long time, Batty pointed at the laptop and said to the postman, "I can buy it."

The postman shook his head: "No, the other side has already settled the bill when you placed the order, you can take it away."

After that, the postman handed Batty his company's business card, gave him some sales pitch, and left the scene.

After he left, Batty told Loach to continue organizing the party, and then left the floor with his notebook without caring about anything else.

He also wanted to continue the party and continue to embarrass the guy who came to disrupt the party, but someone was angry, and very angry, so he had to find a quiet place to comfort him.

"Okay, I'm leaving the party. This is the 35th floor. It's just been renovated. There's no one here."

Batty walked out of the elevator and came to the new room, which was also a large flat, but the decoration style was more classical.

He walked straight into the bedroom and threw himself on the soft palace-style bed.

The screen shook up and down, and with Neymar's bitter and resentful face on it, the whole picture looked even more ridiculous.

Batty couldn't help but burst out laughing again.

"You're still laughing! Who caused all this?" Neymar kept poking the screen with his index finger, as if he could poke Batistuta's nose. "Explain! Why did you invite Ederson to your party but not me? And what's going on with Cristiano Ronaldo?"

Batistuta turned over and lay flat on the bed, looking upside down at Neymar on the screen.

"You ask so many questions." He blew his lips and complained, "I remember I told you that this party was in the UK. I thought you were going back to Brazil for Christmas, so I didn't invite you because I didn't want to delay your vacation."

"What about Edson?"

"He took the initiative to ask me if he could come to England to spend Christmas with me." Batty lied naturally, "He heard that I own a whole building and was so envious that he had to come and see it."

Neymar's frown eased a little.

"What about Ronaldo?" he asked again.

"He must be here to test me. Remember what happened in August? When I chose the club, the media was frantically linking me to Real Madrid. I guess it was Florentino's doing." Batistuta replied.

Speaking of this, he recalled the scene of teasing Ronaldo just now. Seeing him biting the straw, the Portuguese's panic and unbelievable expression was really funny.

The arc of Batty's mouth widened: "Chris is a very interesting guy, and his muscle lines are really beautiful."

Chris?
Is it already so intimate after just one night of contact?

Neymar curled his lips and said, "You never praised my muscle lines."

"Look at yourself and see if you have that thing." Batty said mercilessly, "I saw the highlights of you being knocked to the ground on YouTube. You haven't done any muscle exercises. How can I praise you? Praise you for being skinny and well-proportioned?"

This is a bit hurtful.

"I'm not a center, so I don't need to train myself into a tank. What's more, I'm already doing muscle-building training. I have to lift weights every day while eating grass and chicken breasts. It's very difficult."

Neymar said, raising his arms and squeezing out the muscles above them: "Look, the effect is significant compared to the summer."

It was indeed obvious, so obvious that even if he hadn't mentioned it, Batty wouldn't have noticed any difference.

"Very good." Batty dragged out the last word, and then he turned over and lay down on the bed again, "Did you watch the game I just played? I heard someone started a live broadcast."

Of course he did. He learned all the situations from the live broadcast.

Looking at Batistuta who had returned to his usual lazy state, Neymar's anger disappeared all of a sudden. He knew that it did not disappear out of thin air but turned into other emotions, but he couldn't tell what they were. He could only feel a burning pain in his stomach.

"You just drank some wine, and you played table football when you were drunk. This is a lot of exercise, which will aggravate your drunkenness." The Barcelona star pursed his lips and gently condemned, "Do you feel uncomfortable anywhere?"

"It's just a little bit of wine, how can I get drunk." Batty rolled his eyes at the screen, then took out his phone to check, "I can take care of myself - if there is nothing else, I will hang up. The party is still going on upstairs. Ederson sent me a message asking when I will be back."

Can you take care of yourself?

Neymar doesn't believe it.

But what is more important right now is that Batistuta is going to find Ederson, which suddenly makes Neymar feel more threatened.

He can't let Batistuta go back to Ederson, who could potentially take his place if he does nothing.

"There's something else." He said, "Let's go on vacation during the summer break next year. I've already chosen the place, Santorini Island in Greece. My friend has a villa there, and he agreed to let me stay there."

Neymar's words successfully stopped Batistuta from turning off the computer.

"You're thinking pretty far ahead," he teased.

"Of course, I even thought about taking a helicopter away after the Champions League final, along with the trophy." Neymar laughed, "It's a pity you are not in Barcelona, ​​otherwise it would be a trophy for both of us."

Batty laughed out loud.

"Why, if I'm not in Barcelona, ​​the trophy can't be mine?" He raised his chin, "I tell you, no matter what, the Barcelona trophy will be mine. If you want to share it, you can come to Manchester City."

"There is no place for me in Manchester City."

"Then is there a place for me in Barcelona?" Neymar pursed his lips. He realized that this topic was a dead loop and there would never be a way out of it.

"Forget about that, let's talk about vacation." He asked again, "Santorini, we can go diving, what do you think?"

"Not bad," Batty shrugged, causing his collar to fall off.

The light in the room was not very bright, and through a layer of screen, the collarbone was hazy when looking down. However, just before Neymar's eyes adjusted to the darkness, Batistuta casually pulled up one side of his collar, covering most of it.

"See you in the final. The final result will determine whether I will go on vacation." Batistuta waved lazily at Neymar. "Before that, remember not to lose to anyone."

After saying that, he pressed the button decisively and the screen went black.

Watching his face reappear on the screen that suddenly went black, Neymar knocked on the table in frustration.

He just wanted Batty to be closer to him, just a little bit.

……

With Batti's departure, the game ended in a mess, the live broadcast ended, and the party returned to normal.

Loach patted Edson's shoulder, who was still sad, and comforted him with music and dance.

Seeing that his host had left, Ronaldo was about to take the car back, when Augustus suddenly grabbed his arm.

"You know Manchester United's performance has not been very good in recent years." He said without thinking, "I heard your name everywhere in their youth training camp. Everyone wants to be you."

C Ronaldo is very inexplicable. Of course, every child wants to be him. There is no need to discuss this.

"What do you want to say?" he asked.

"Nothing." Augustus replied, "I will restore the glory of Manchester United, take back all the awards, let the name of the Red Devils resound throughout Europe again, and I will pluck the most dazzling rose from our 'noisy neighbor's' house."

The most dazzling rose? Does it mean Batistuta?
Ronaldo's eyes immediately became strange when he looked at Augustus.

Now he began to believe Batty's assessment of this man as a 'madman'.

"Looking at your performance just now, you have to practice harder if you want to achieve it." Ronaldo replied with a fake smile, "Well... I wish you good luck?"

Augustus didn't bother him to talk anymore, waved his hand and left the party. Ronaldo stood in front of the billiard table where he had just played the game, feeling inexplicably complicated.

He thought for a while, took out his cell phone and called a former teammate.

"Hi, Ricardo, how was your trip to the United States? What I want to tell you is - the junior you are optimistic about, Batistuta, I think he is pretty good and has great potential... Yes, if you can meet him, please help me persuade him to come to Real Madrid. It will only do him good. He is not safe in Manchester City... I will protect him until he can stand on his own."

……

Batty's all-night partying at home caused quite a stir, and the next day all the newspapers in Britain reported on it.

[Manchester City's striker spent the whole night having fun, overdrawing his body, and may be in poor condition in the second half of the season]

[Meeting Ronaldo by chance, is Batistuta about to transfer to Real Madrid and become the next king? 】

[Love at first sight? Love and hate? Let’s talk about the love-hate relationship between the young master of the Rothschild family and Manchester City striker Batistuta]

As for Batty, he didn't feel anything about these reports, he thought they were ridiculous.

What really should be reported is that he used his strength to embarrass the guy who came to challenge him.

The party lasted until after 2 o'clock. After it ended, Batistuta called Neymar again. The two of them slept with the microphone connected and didn't hang up until the next morning.

Neymar was quite satisfied with this, but what he didn't know was that after he fell asleep, Batistuta turned on the mute function without wasting a minute, then ran to Ederson's room and played games with him for half the night before going to sleep.

Going to bed at 4 a.m. and getting up at 8:45 a.m., Batty's robotic schedule once again paid off.

Yes, he went there for training again.

I had just entered the locker room and hadn't even put on my gear when I heard Guardiola's voice coming from the door -

"Barty, don't change your clothes yet, come with me."

They came to the office and sat down. Batistuta guessed that the coach must want to tell him about the party, so he spoke first: "I know what you want to say, but don't, nothing will happen. I didn't have a sex party. It was just a normal, relaxing party. And - even if I went to bed at 4 o'clock last night, if there is a game today, I can still run for 90 minutes and score a goal."

After hearing what Batistuta said, Guardiola was surprised for a moment, then smiled.

"No, Batistuta, I think your party is great. I watched the live broadcast yesterday and the table football was great," he said. "If there is a next time, remember to invite me. I used to be a midfielder for Barcelona and my footwork is no worse than theirs."

Guardiola surprised Batistuta again. He raised his eyebrows and looked at the head coach: "You are not going to criticize me for having fun, so what do you want to say when you called me here?"

"Well, this." Guardiola showed a mysterious smile, "What I want to ask is, your partner Ederson last night, what do you think of him?"

Oh?
This means——

"What are you asking about?" Batistuta smiled. "In terms of football, I can say he is very good. His long passes are accurate and comfortable. If he is here, at least he won't be sent off for a mistake in attack - I like him."

Guardiola knew Batistuta understood what he meant: "So, does he have any ideas about the transfer?"

"You can ask him about this yourself," Batty said with a smile, "He's at my house now. If you go early, you might have to wake him up."

……

Guardiola did not go directly to Batistuta's apartment to ask Ederson's wishes. He asked Batistuta for his phone number, communicated with him by voice first, and then applied to the club. The transfer window starts in January, and he still has time to get to know this young player.

At the same time, the Premier League Christmas match is also being held.

On the second day of Christmas, Manchester City challenged Hull City away. Batistuta came on as a substitute in the 71st minute. As he said, even after several days of partying, he was in good shape. In the last 20 minutes, he assisted De Bruyne to score the fourth goal of the game. They won the game 4-4.

Five days later, they faced the 5th round of the league on the evening of December 19st, which would be Manchester City's last game in 12.

Still away from home, their opponent is Liverpool.

(End of this chapter)