[Football] Bad Boy Batty

For Manchester City and its fans, the little king is like a beacon in the fog. No matter how bad the situation is, as long as he is still there smiling ostentatiously at the camera, the team can still move forward.

But now that he has fallen, many problems have emerged.

For example - after Batistuta, Manchester City players began to suffer injuries one after another. Walker sprained his ankle in the second leg against Atletico Madrid and was substituted. In the same game, De Bruyne had a calf muscle problem and was also substituted early.

Many fans said that although Manchester City beat Atletico Madrid by a large margin in two rounds, it was a heavy loss.

After defeating Atletico Madrid, the next opponent of the Blue Moon Army is Real Madrid, which is also from Madrid. However, at this critical time, Cancelo and Messi were injured in training and may miss the match against Real Madrid.

Of course, the situation at Real Madrid is not very optimistic either.

So some people speculated that in the first leg of the semi-final between Manchester City and Real Madrid, due to the absence of important players from both sides, another spectacle in football history might come.

Manchester City has no available full-backs, so they can only send out four central defenders, Ake, Laporte, Ruben Dias and Stones, to form the defense line; Real Madrid has no available central defenders, so they can only send out four full-backs, Alaba, Marcelo, Carvajal and Vazquez, to guard the backcourt.

Fans who like to watch the fun said, "Come more, we enjoy watching it."

Of course, this is just one of the less noticeable impacts brought about by Batistuta's injury. The most important thing is that without his command on the court, the whole team seems a little confused and no longer passionate.

In order to change the status quo, the Manchester City captain asked the team to have a video call with him before the game. He sat on the sofa at home watching TV and gave a passionate speech to the locker room.

It turned out to be a good idea. At the beginning, the effect was remarkable. Manchester City, with only half of the starting team left, won 1-0 at Anfield and won 3 points. Then in the match against Tottenham, Neymar, Foden and B Silva won a big victory together, which was regarded as revenge for the first round.

But this method didn't work until the second round of the Manchester derby.

【The ball went in! 3-1, 90 minutes, Griezmann assisted Mbappe to score another goal! Manchester City's defensive players tried their best to chase back, but in the end they still couldn't stop the ball from entering the net. It seems that Batistuta's absence has a greater impact on Manchester City than we thought... The game is over, back at Old Trafford, Manchester United is still continuing their winning streak, and finally defeated their old rival Manchester City. I believe their players can sleep well today. 】

"What a bullshit competition! Go to hell!"

Batty sat on the sofa with his arms folded, angrily watching the live broadcast of the game in the broadcast room. He angrily kicked over several prayer shaman statues on the coffee table with his good leg.

"Don't be so angry, baby." Qiao Lin comforted her, "Your injury hasn't lasted a month. Getting angry won't help your recovery."

This is absolutely true.

If you want to recover quickly, you need to focus on this and don't make things difficult for yourself.

Batistuta took a deep breath and calmed himself down, but Neville on TV kept praising how great Manchester United was today. His voice gave Batistuta a headache, so the Manchester City captain threw the remote control away.

"Fuck Manchester United, fuck Sky Sports, curse you!"

Although this cannot fundamentally solve the problem, it can make him feel better psychologically.

The remote control fell to the ground, and a button was pressed accidentally. The progress bar moved forward a few steps, eliminating the delay and returning to the real live broadcast. At the same time, the volume was also turned up.

Just like that, the TV screen changed from Neville, whom Batistuta disliked, to Augustus, whom Batistuta disliked even more.

"Oh my God..." He made an irritated sound, then touched Qiao Lin next to him with the pillow, "Help me get the remote control, Qiao Qiao."

"Why change? He's the captain of Manchester United, your most loyal opponent. Don't you want to know what he said about this game?" Qiao Lin was obviously squeezing him and showed no sign of moving.

"No." Batty rolled his eyes. He believed that at this moment, his friends were imagining him and the guy on TV fighting first and then having sex. Don't think he didn't notice that just now, when Augustus' red figure appeared on TV, Qiao Lin's typing hand immediately stopped.

"Okay, okay, if you don't help me, I'll find a way myself." Batty gave his friend the middle finger, "Alexa, shut up!"

"No!" Just as he was about to call the smart housekeeper to turn off the TV, Qiao Lin rushed over and covered his mouth, "Don't be like this, Batistuta, you are the captain of Manchester City, you are the king, you have to face the team's failure head-on."

"……let go."

"I know you feel bad about losing to Manchester United, but you can't escape it," Qiao Lin quickly took the remote control and paused the screen. "Listen to what he says, at least you will know where the problem lies."

The screen was almost filled with Augustus's handsome but frivolous face, and Batty cast a disapproving look at Qiaolin.

"Don't think I don't know what you are planning." He complained angrily.

Qiao Lin scratched her hair, closed her eyes, and then opened them again, with an extremely pleading look in her eyes: "Just think of this as providing me with spiritual food, please, Barty."

Batty: ...

She had learned this trick since they were little. Whenever she went to him and Loach to complain about being bullied, they would take up weapons and go looking for trouble with each other.

For Qiaolin, this method has always worked.

"That's enough. Stop it, my friend." Batty stretched out his hand to push away her flattering smile and looked at the screen listlessly. "Just listen to what else this lunatic has to say."

The Manchester United captain above is being interviewed.

[Congratulations on another victory, and it was a derby match. How would you like to comment on this game? ]

Augustus: "This is probably the easiest derby we have ever won. I have to say, they have never been so easy to play against. Did you watch the game? (Reporter: I did). Then you should know that without Batistuta they can't win. It's like a house without a foundation. It will fall down at the slightest touch."

[You think Batistuta is the core of Manchester City. 】

Augustus: "Isn't it? People should have known this a few seasons ago. Without him, there would be no Manchester City today. Without him, there would be no me today. In a way, he is the core of both Manchester teams."

[Compared to the derby, you seem to be more willing to treat this game as a duel between you and Batistuta, then Mbappe——]

Augustus: "Kylian is very good. He and Batistuta are players in the same position. They became famous at almost the same time. People always compare them together. This is nothing, but you have to know that the key to the game between Manchester City and Manchester United will always be me and Batistuta."

After saying that, the Manchester United captain suddenly changed the subject. He gathered his hair that was almost shoulder-length and looked at the reporter: "Should I keep growing it and comb it up, or give up and cut it short and return it to its original shape?"

[Uh—I’m not sure, maybe cut it short?]

"I'm not asking you." Augustus stretched his neck. "I mean, which one do you think Barty would like?"

[…Maybe you could just ask him directly, assuming you have his number.]

"Of course I do," Augustus said. "I'll call him right away if he's willing to release me from the blacklist."

The reporter was almost driven crazy by his taking over and there was no way he could continue. He gestured to the camera to cut off the live broadcast, as there would be an accident if they continued like this.

"and many more."

But before that, the Manchester United captain stopped them and asked the camera to be pointed at him. He looked directly into the camera and gradually smiled sincerely.

He said: "Get well soon, Batistuta, I'm really bored in the derby without you."

Just a few seconds after the Frenchman finished speaking, the screen cut back to the studio, and the interview with the players on the scene ended here.

"Oh my God." Qiao Lin sighed and said, "Did you hear what he said at the end, Barty? This is the first time, the first time I heard him call your name so normally."

Batty stared at the screen in a daze for a long time without responding.

"Not the first time," he said suddenly.

"What?" Jolene said, confused. "Are we talking about the same thing, Barty?"

"Yes, you said this was the first time you heard him call my name normally, but it wasn't." Batty said vaguely, as if he was under a spell of imperius. "He did that during the Golden Globe Awards. It wasn't the awards ceremony yet. He used puffs to lure me into the utility room for a private chat, and then he did a lot of self-analysis."

Qiaolin was stunned.

"Buddy!" She nearly jumped up from the sofa. "What he did to you...you and him...Jesus Christ! Why didn't you tell me something so important!"

"Que? I just--" Batty woke up with a start. Seeing Qiaolin's eyes wide open, he realized what he had done. He touched his nose a little uncomfortably.

Just as he was racking his brains to think of an excuse to get away with it, his cell phone rang.

"Hey! Someone's looking for me." Batty breathed a sigh of relief. Under Qiao Lin's annoyed gaze, he quickly answered the phone, "Hi, this is Batty!"

"Hello, Barty, how are you today?"

A familiar voice sounded, and the smile on Batty's face froze. A call at this time, given the personality of the voice owner, was definitely not good news that would make him happy.

Qiao Lin was distracted by his reaction. "Who's that?" she asked with her mouth.

Batistuta raised his index finger to stop her, and then responded in a relaxed tone after being fully prepared: "Not bad, recovering steadily, how about you, how are you, Thibaud?" Thibaud? Which Thibaud, Thibaud Courtois?

Qiao Lin twitched her eyebrows. This was more interesting than what happened with Augustus just now.

'Is that Courtois? ' she mouthed again.

Batty gave her a look.

"That's great, I'm glad to hear that you're getting better." Courtois' tone seemed to be really happy for Batistuta, but soon, he suddenly changed direction and said, "But Batistuta, Manchester City will play against Real Madrid soon, I think you may not be able to make it."

What the fuck is this bullshit.

Manchester City officials have long announced the news of the captain's injury. Everyone knows that he will be out for 10 weeks due to a fracture of the fifth metatarsal. Moreover, the Champions League semi-final is coming soon. As an opponent, he cannot be unaware of the real situation.

At this moment, Batistuta felt a strong sense of annoyance towards the Belgian on the other end of the phone, even more than the French on TV just now.

But he still kept his composure.

"Yes, unfortunately, I can't make it." Batty said lightly, with anger in every word, "But you know what, Tebow, even if I don't play, I can still easily beat you and advance to the finals."

"Oh, just think of it as your good wishes, I know. The injured need a belief or something to persevere, otherwise it will be too hard." Courtois continued to say words that made Batistuta angry, "But seriously, without you and Kevin, do you really think you can win?"

"Why not?" Batty asked, clutching the phone tightly.

"Who do you want to win with, Neymar? Or Messi?" The Belgian goalkeeper said disdainfully, his words were full of indifference to Manchester City and trust in Real Madrid, "Come on, you know what I said is right, Batistuta."

Batty didn't have the patience to continue talking to him.

"What do you want?" The Manchester City king said bluntly, "Did you call me today just to disgust me, Mr. Courtois?"

"No, no, how could you think so, Batistuta?" Courtois said innocently, but then he tore off his gentle disguise with his own hands, "I just want to tell you today, baby, in this game, I want you to watch your team lose with your own eyes, and you can't do anything."

Batty clenched his back teeth.

"Then..." Courtois said at full speed, "When we complete a double kill at your home stadium in the second round, I will go to your house and replay the moment of your failure. I want you to remember that it was you who caused the team's failure."

"And I, when you confess, will grab your right foot in a cast and fuck it until your brain is so confused that there is only room for me." He continued, "Then you will use your nice voice to ask me to stop or slow down, but no, dear, I will continue."

"You think so beautifully."

"Yeah, I think it's wonderful too." Courtois seemed not to hear Batistuta's sarcasm. "When the time comes, it's up to you to decide whether to invite Kevin to watch."

After saying this, without waiting for the other side to respond, the Belgian goalkeeper decisively ended the call.

He was right, this would indeed make Batistuta angry.

"**da puta!"

The Manchester City captain was furious. He held his mobile phone as if he was going to vent his anger on it like a Real Madrid goalkeeper.

Qiao Lin listened to the entire conversation between the two and realized that it was inappropriate to interrupt with fan fiction at this time.

"I think he's holding a grudge against you for being eliminated last season and the season before that, so he's here to take advantage of you when you're injured," she analyzed.

Batty snorted a few times in annoyance and did not comment.

The air became quiet.

"Qiao Qiao, do you want to step aside?" Batty suddenly said, "I might throw something and curse you with the dirtiest words you have ever heard in your life."

Qiao Lin expressed her understanding. She stood up and walked towards the door: "I'll be back in a while. Try not to hurt yourself."

Batty waved calmly.

But who knows what overwhelming negative emotions are hidden beneath that calmness?

Just as Qiaolin was about to close the door, she suddenly thought of a good idea.

"You know, I've changed my mind," she said, walking back quickly. "Maybe this thing can cheer you up."

Batty stared at her complainingly: "I know you care about me, but what I need now is to vent."

Qiao Lin didn't listen to what he said. She opened a music app on her phone, searched for the tags #dancing and #male, and threw the phone directly into his arms.

"What is this?" Batty frowned and picked up the phone. "Get out now, wait for Kevin to come over, then I won't have...WTF?"

His eyes were glued directly to the screen.

Accompanied by fast-paced music, in the center of the picture there is a white young man who is dancing happily in the gym with a confident and sunny smile on his face. At the moment when the music changes, he turns around and pulls off his shirt, revealing his muscular lines that were already very conspicuous under his T-shirt.

Barty watched with wide eyes.

Soon the video ended and the screen automatically jumped to the next one. The next one was still a dance video of the same type, and the protagonist had an even better figure and a more delicate face than the previous one, but the scene was changed from the bedroom to outdoors.

"This is--" Batty didn't know what to say.

"Tik Tok, a short video platform." Qiao Lin crossed her arms and gestured to him, "It has been popular since 2020. I'm quite surprised that you haven't joined yet."

"Is it the app that's full of embarrassing videos?" Batty looked at his friend with an indescribable look. "I've known about it since it came out. I just don't like it."

"what about now?"

"…I still don't."

"Stop brushing your hands and tell me you don't like it, okay?"

“…I won’t use it!”

"Okay, if you don't use it, I will. This is my account, you can look at it as you like." Qiao Lin raised the corners of her mouth, looked at her friend who was gradually becoming addicted on the sofa, and smiled as she retired.

She knew that baby Batistuta couldn't resist the temptation of short videos. After seeing enough of the Polish dancer's (Lewandowski) spicy videos, it was time to give the football world a little shock to the Brazilian Rose.

……

Later that night, De Bruyne came to visit Batistuta at his home after finishing his physiotherapy, but as soon as he entered the door, a mobile phone was stuffed into his hand.

Batty called out to him expectantly, "You're just in time, Kevin! Come on!"

Before he could figure out what was going on, De Bruyne was asked to stand in front of the TV and then kept changing positions to meet the filming needs of Batistuta who was sitting on the sofa.

"Uh, Batistuta?" De Bruyne looked over. "What is this?"

"Tik Tok, I want to shoot Tik Tok." Batty gave him an extremely kind and pleading look, "You know, the first month after the plaster was put on was very difficult. I basically couldn't do anything."

Speaking of injuries, the Belgian midfielder compromised.

then--

"Lower, lower!"
"No! You have to go over there first, this filter isn't like this, you have to take a picture of my profile!"
"Help me, Kevin. I know you're the best."

Looking at Batistuta, who was acting uncharacteristically like a spoiled brat for the sake of the photo, De Bruyne's eyes gradually lost their luster.

(End of this chapter)