[Football] Bad Boy Batty

It’s the last day of April, and Manchester City still has a whole month to go until they win all their games of the season… Of course, as long as they can win all the games that follow.

On this memorable day, the Blue Moon welcomed their second German opponent of the season. In the Champions League semi-finals, they faced the Bundesliga champion, Bayern Munich, which has won the championship for 10 consecutive seasons.

Regarding the Stones issue, Batistuta thought he had resolved his worries, but he could not rush to the head coach's office and tell Pep: Don't worry, I have convinced your defender, please feel free to use him.

Well, what he meant was that he could do that, but that would most likely cause their head coach to have a heart attack, so for the sake of the team's safety, Batistuta only vaguely told the head coach that the alarm had been lifted.

Naturally, Guardiola did not understand what his beloved disciple meant, so even though Stones performed well in recent training, the Catalan did not allow him to appear in the starting lineup.

Batistuta was a little worried about this, but Stones soon told Batistuta that he was fine with his performance.

"We have come so far, we can't fall here! Bayern is strong, but they are no longer the Bayern that beat us last season. Their strength is declining, and we are improving!"
"Follow our plan and find the gap between the center back and the midfielder. We have watched the video of Bayern. Limiting Kimmich is equivalent to limiting their passing!"
"Steal, local steal, always pay attention to the numerical advantage, just like Pep said thousands of times! The season is within reach, everyone! We will never fall here!"

Looking at Stones who was making a passionate mobilization in the locker room, Batistuta nodded proudly in his heart. This was the defensive leader in his mind.

Even though he was two seasons late, but - Hey, better late than never.

"Okay, friends, you heard what Johnny said, we are creating our own glorious history! Cheer up and get excited! I believe in you, you can do it!" Batty stood up and made the final summary speech, "Let's go kick some German ass!"

After gesturing to apologize to Gundogan, Batistuta walked out of the locker room and sat down on the bench with Stones and others.

Yes, Batty was not in the starting lineup today.

This is certainly not Guardiola trying out new tactics or doing anything new. Batistuta failed to start simply because his old knee injury showed signs of recurrence.

Two days ago, at the Etihad training ground, Guardiola was organizing the players to compete in groups. Batistuta followed Group C and Group D, still in the position of a free man, following whichever side attacked. Less than 5 minutes into the group match, Batistuta raised his hand to call a timeout, then limped to the sidelines and sat down.

This really shocked everyone including Guardiola, and they quickly sent the little king for various examinations. The results showed that his problem was not serious. He just had a slight strain on his knee and would be able to return to the court after resting for 1 or 2 weeks.

Later that day, Neymar, who had already started recovery training, got the news and rushed to visit Batistuta. When he arrived at the dedicated physiotherapy room, he saw Batistuta lying comfortably on the bed with a dessert plate in his hand. Alandes was sticking electrode patches (or something like that) on his right knee. There were a bunch of wires on them, all connected to the machine next to them.

Batty seemed to be unaware of the wires on his right leg. He was enjoying eating pudding, humming a song and shaking his left leg. He looked very happy.

"I'm so worried to death, and you still have the mood to do this." Neymar walked over and tapped Batistuta on the forehead.

"Hey!" Batistuta touched his red forehead. "The injured captain is still the captain, player Neymar, don't disrespect the captain."

"Yes, yes, your Excellency Batistuta, I am sorry for being rude. I should have asked my superiors first and then walked in solemnly, kissed the back of your hand and then expressed my condolences to you." Neymar cooperated and saluted.

"That would be best." Batty raised his chin arrogantly and waved his hand, "Forget it, you are a first-time offender, I will grant you a pardon."

"Thank you, Your Majesty. Seriously, how is your injury?" Neymar cleared his throat and returned to seriousness. "When will it be better? Don't let me play when you fall down again."

"It won't take a few days." Batty looked at his right knee and pursed his lips. "With conservative treatment, I don't even have to be excluded from the roster. I can still play if the team needs me."

"You'd better rest for a few days." Andreas said suddenly, "Just because you're fine now doesn't mean you'll be fine in the future. As a doctor, I still need to make it clear to you all possible situations."

"It'll be fine." Batty shrugged, looking quite relaxed. "I know my own body. I'll scream if it hurts."

Neymar gave him a disapproving look.

Batty returned a warm, flamboyant smile and crossed himself.

"Believe me, even God is helping us this season."

……

The game started quickly. Compared with Manchester City, Bayern seemed a little at a loss. According to German media reports, the Bundesliga giants had formulated a double-digit plan for the connection between Batistuta, De Bruyne and B Silva, but this time, Batistuta sat on the bench and Flick could only temporarily change the tactical tendency.

This led to Manchester City easily taking the lead and gradually bringing the game into their own rhythm in the first 15 minutes.

In the 19th minute, Mahrez knocked the ball back from the bottom line, B Silva made a pass, and Phil Foden successfully scored in front of the goal, 1-0, Manchester City took the lead at home.

After establishing the advantage, the atmosphere on the bench became much more relaxed.

Batistuta found a team flag and covered himself with it, then quietly tied the straps on the back of one corner of the flag to Stones' shoelaces. He then crossed his legs and occasionally touched Stones' calves with his toes, which were only wearing socks.

Just wait until he can’t help but fight back, and then he will suffer.

But that's it.

"Hey Batistuta, haven't you decided on the head coach for the Brazilian team yet?" Lucas, who was sitting on Batistuta's left, suddenly came over and asked, interrupting Batistuta's prank.

"No." Batistuta answered perfunctorily. He was now concentrating on making fun of Stones.

"You're not in a hurry either?" Lucas asked again. "The America's Cup is coming soon. This summer, the postponed European Cup and the America's Cup will be held together. You can't be without a head coach by then."

"I don't know." Batistuta shook his hair, the topic distracted him a little. "It's up to the Football Association. We don't have the final say. The most we can do is put pressure on it."

Lucas smacked his lips, and Batty glanced over at him.

"Why do you care?" he asked.

"Oh, I heard some rumors." Lucas touched his nose and pretended to be calm. "Not long ago, Deschamps (France coach) and Giroud and Benzema had a big fight. Some people said that if he didn't get any results in this European Cup, he would be fired. I heard some news about the Brazilian team while asking about this."

"Hmm?" Batty's interest was completely piqued. He gave up on Stones and turned to Lucas. "What's the news? Tell me."

"Zidane." Lucas leaned close to Batistuta's ear and threw a name.

Batty blinked, not knowing how to digest it for a moment.

"What do you mean?" he asked, "Does Zidane want to coach France?" Lucas nodded, very slightly, "Yes, it is said that he has been eyeing Deschamps' position for a long time, but has not yet told the media (that the battle has begun), and only a few people inside have received the news."

"Ooo-okay." Batistuta replied doubtfully. As for the French team, everyone knew that they had a long tradition of internal strife, but Batistuta was not very interested. "So what does this have to do with Brazil?"

"It does matter. Didn't your Football Association say that it might recruit a head coach from outside? I heard that Zidane is also on the list." Lucas said mysteriously.

"Huh?" Batistuta made an expression of disbelief. "You mean Zidane could become the head coach of the Brazilian team? That's ridiculous. It's impossible."

"It's just gossip." Lucas shook his eyebrows and made an expression of 'you know what I mean'. "Anton (Griezmann) told me a few days ago that Zidane is waiting for the European Cup and for Deschamps to make a fool of himself. When Deschamps steps down, he can smoothly move into Clairefontaine."

Batty gave a complicated fake smile.

"What? Is he still using Brazil as a backup?"

"You can't say that." Lucas shook his finger at Batistuta. "According to the message Augustus sent in the group, Ronaldinho may have called Zidane to invite him to coach. Ronaldinho and Zidane have been friends for many years, so Zidane did not directly reject the Brazilian Football Association for Ronaldinho's sake. He just said he would wait and see."

Batty blew his lips. "This is ridiculous."

"That's why it's called gossip," Lucas concluded.

"Like you said, the Copa America is coming up soon, and he still dares to say 'wait and see' at this time?" Batistuta sneered sarcastically, "Maybe we will really use an interim head coach to play in this Copa America. That's great. It seems that I am destined to miss that ugly trophy."

"What are you talking about?" Lucas reached into the team flag and squeezed Batty's palm. "Didn't you win the trophy last time?"

"But that has nothing to do with me." Batistuta pouted and complained softly, "I was injured in the group stage and didn't play many games. If you ask me, that's Neymar's trophy. It belongs to him completely."

Lucas understood what Batistuta meant. He had nothing to say about it and could only hold Batistuta's hand to give him strength.

"Your hands are sweaty."

"Uh, sorry." Lucas smiled and let go. "So, Batistuta, if Zidane really becomes your head coach, what do you think?"

"I think - I don't have any opinion." Batistuta's attitude was friendlier than expected. "Zidane led Real Madrid well, and not just for one season, which shows that he is at least capable of leading a top team. I'm not picky, but to be honest, after Pep, I still - it would be great if Pep could coach the Brazilian team."

This is somewhat unexpected.

Lucas made a surprised expression.

"Is it rated so highly?" he asked. "I thought you--"

Batty shrugged.

Guardiola is sometimes annoying and neurotic, forcing the team to integrate his own ideas and execute according to what he wants, but it cannot be denied that many people have made a qualitative leap under Guardiola's training.

At the end of the first half, Manchester City led 1-0.

Batty stood up and stretched his back: "Let's go back to the locker room."

Stones beside him nodded and stood up, then -

"Ow!!"

Because his shoelaces were tied to the team flag, he staggered forward a few steps, then knelt down in front of Guardiola in a very pious, even a little too pious, posture.

Guardiola: …?
"Hahahahahahahahahaha! Look, what a stupid defender!" Batistuta burst into laughter behind him. He pointed at Stones and laughed until he couldn't straighten his back.

Stones lay there, his face as red as a tomato.

Guardiola looked at Stones who was kneeling down to worship him at his feet, then looked at Batistuta who was obviously the troublemaker, and the expression on his face gradually cracked.

"You seemed to be having a lot of fun on the bench," he said, looking at Batty.

Batty felt uneasy.

"No, no, I didn't—"

But it's too late.

"In that case," Guardiola said slowly, "then sit on the bench until the end of the game."

After saying that, the head coach straightened his collar and turned back to the player tunnel.

Batty: ...

"Do not--"

……

Of course, Batistuta finally got a chance to play in the 94th minute, with less than a minute left in extra time.

Batty: ...
Batty: Why should I go up there?
Normally, the final substitution is to delay time and disrupt the opponent's offense. The head coach will replace some substitute players, but for Batistuta, it is obviously to warn and warn him.

In the end, Manchester City defeated Bayern 3-0 at home. With a 3-goal lead, they didn't have to go to the Allianz Arena in Munich with tension and anxiety in the second round.

Then the problem is coming.

Batistuta ran for 40 seconds in this game and only participated in one pass before hearing the final whistle. When he returns to the locker room, does he still need to take a shower?

(End of this chapter)