[Football] Bad Boy Batty

Three days later, in the 3rd round of the Premier League, the Manchester derby was repeated, this time at the Etihad Stadium.

Compared to Manchester United, Manchester City, who are only one step away from winning the league title and have three away goals in the Champions League, have it much easier. In order to ensure that there will be no problems in the second round of the Champions League, Guardiola chose to rotate in this league game.

The formation is close to 433, with Sterling, B Silva, Danilo and Laporte getting the starting positions. The goalkeeper is still Ederson, the central defenders are captain Kompany and Otamendi, the midfielders are D Silva, Fernandinho, and Gundogan, and Sterling is in the middle on the front line, Sane is on the left, and B Silva is on the right.

Aguero's old knee injury recurred and he was unable to play on the striker line. Jesus, De Bruyne, Batistuta, and two full-backs Lucas and Walker were temporarily placed on the bench.

Manchester United's personnel changes were much smaller. Compared with the Champions League match against Manchester City, Mourinho only made two personnel adjustments. Valencia and Herrera returned to the starting lineup, and Augustus partnered with Herrera as double defensive midfielders to enhance hardness and prevent Manchester City's interceptions in the midfield and frontcourt.

For Manchester United, they can basically secure a place in the Champions League next season. In comparison, the second leg of the Champions League at the weekend is more important. However, if they cannot beat Manchester City in the league, they will be caught up by Chelsea, which ranks third, and only 3 point behind them. Therefore, Mourinho has a bigger headache than Guardiola in terms of personnel arrangements.

This also led to Mourinho publicly criticizing the intensive schedule of the Premier League a few days before the game, saying that playing three games in seven days was completely inhumane. This statement immediately triggered a discussion in the British media. Many people agreed with his point of view, but some people also said that Manchester City also played three games in seven days, but they won 7-3.

Fans were discussing the issue online, but what no one knew was that Guardiola logged into his second account and liked Mourinho's tweet criticizing the busy schedule.

"We're going to win anyway, so let's just keep it close." In the locker room before the game, Batty was lying on a therapy bed getting a massage. He scrolled through Twitter on his phone and spoke slowly, "The only thing we need to worry about now is how to protect ourselves in the crowd."

"Crowd? Protection?" B Seat came over. I don't know why this guy never does physical therapy. "I don't understand what you mean, Batty."

Batistuta put down his phone and supported his head with his hand. He turned sideways and raised his eyebrows to look at B Silva: "We are going to win the home championship 6 rounds in advance. By then, there will definitely be a large number of fans rushing into the stadium. Have you ever felt the feeling of being hugged by dozens of people? I can only tell you that it is very awesome."

"We haven't won yet, and you're already imagining what it's like when the fans enter the stadium?"

"Why, do you think the team can't win if I don't start?" Batistuta asked, "You were in my position today, Bernardo, I think you will inherit the glorious tradition of the right wing, go ahead!"

Seat B: …

Seat B: "Why do I feel like you're particularly lively today?"

"Really? I just--Hey! It hurts! Alan, what are you doing!" Before Batty could finish his words, he was poked by the fascia gun on his thigh from behind, and he gasped. He turned around and glared at the physical therapist, scolding him mercilessly: "If you don't know how to massage, don't do it. You're about to poke that fascia gun into my flesh. Do you want to give my bones a recovery package as well?"

Arandez was speechless. "Don't use such vulgar words. I won't stick the fascia gun into your flesh. This is not a slaughterhouse."

"Really? But I feel like you just want to kill me."

"I just relieved your fatigue as required. You played the whole game last time." Alandos explained, "If you don't use some strength, your thigh muscles will not relax when the game starts at the weekend."

Batty smacked his lips impatiently. "I remember you were doing data monitoring. When did you start specializing in physical therapy?"

"I started out as a data analysis assistant, but there was no rule in the team that prevents me from having multiple jobs. It just so happened that Gillim (physical therapist) had something going on at home this season, so I took over." Alandez turned off the fascia gun, got some essential oil from the side and started massaging with his hands.

Batty finally breathed a sigh of relief and refreshed Twitter.

Then I saw a new message being pushed to the front row.

[It is reported that Lucas Hernandez, the former Atletico Madrid player who transferred to Manchester City in the winter transfer window, has recently applied for Spanish citizenship and is determined to play for the Spanish team. Spain's new coach Lopetegui promised that Lucas will be the main player for Spain in the World Cup. 】——"Marca"

Batty blinked in confusion. Isn't Lucas French?

Just then, Lucas passed by him after receiving physical therapy, but before Batistuta could ask, Guardiola clapped his hands and walked into the locker room and began to cheer up the players who started today.

"okay."
Alandez patted Batistuta on the butt to tell him that the physiotherapy was over. Batistuta moved his shoulders and sat up from the therapy bed. Looking at the impassioned head coach, he decided to leave the questions until after the game started.

……

Before the game started, Manchester City fans in the stands held up blue signs and displayed the words "Manchester City! Premier League defending champions!" at the same time. It seemed that they couldn't wait to rush into the field to celebrate.

Manchester United played very aggressively after the opening. Several attacks launched from the backcourt threatened Manchester City's goal, but fortunately, Manchester City defended it.

The situation gradually stabilized.

In the 18th minute, Smalling committed a foul but failed to hold Kompany back. The Manchester City captain jumped high and headed the ball into the goal, 1-0, Manchester City took the lead at home.

In the 30th minute, Sterling passed the ball to the penalty area, and Gundogan turned and shot gracefully. A beautiful low shot helped Manchester City lead 2-0!

Manchester City came back 3 minutes later!
There is a big gap in the middle of Manchester United!
Sterling has a one-on-one chance!
Sterling hits it high!

Everyone who saw this said something about Manchester United defender Sterling. Even Guardiola exaggeratedly held his head on the sidelines and exclaimed that his wonderful performance was incredible.

Batistuta on the bench burst into laughter, not because of Sterling's happy football, but because Guardiola was facing him when he held his head, and he saw every detail of the pain on his face clearly. Fortunately, he was not drinking water at that time, otherwise there would be another dark scene.
"Do you know why Pep's head is bald? It's because of this! Hahahahaha!"

Batistuta was lying on De Bruyne's lap and almost fainted from laughing. He also slapped his thigh while laughing. Of course, it was De Bruyne's thigh.

……

Neither side scored any more goals afterwards, and the score remained 2-0 until halftime.

After the second half resumed, Batistuta on the bench raised his elbow and touched Lucas next to him.

"Have you applied for Spanish citizenship?" he asked.

"Huh?" Lucas was a little surprised by Batty's question, "Where did you hear this?"

"News," Batistuta said. "Marca said you will be the main defender for Spain."

"I haven't really thought about this yet." Lucas scratched his head and said shyly, "The Spanish head coach called me and said I would be an important part of his tactical arrangement."

"So you've decided to play for Spain?"

"Ah."

"But didn't you represent France in the World Youth Championship? Can you still change it?"

"Yes, as long as you have never participated in an A-level national team event for a country, you can change. The World Youth Championship is not an A-level event." Lucas waved his hand, his face full of confusion, "But I just applied for nationality, and it has not been approved yet. Deschamps also called me the day before yesterday. I really don't know which side to choose."

"Deschamps? French coach Didier Deschamps?"

"Yes, that's him." Lucas grabbed Batistuta's hand on his leg and played with his fingers. "To be honest, Deschamps is more sincere than Lopetegui. He told me that the French team has the potential to win the championship, but he can't guarantee it because they still lack a left-back."

"Oh - he's so good at talking." Batty twitched his eyebrows and gently pinched Lucas's fingertips. "So which side do you lean towards?"

"I don't know. My brother Theo is a staunch Frenchman. My friend Griezmann from Atletico Madrid is also French. He sent me a message a few days ago, hoping that I could join him." Lucas lowered his head and slid his index finger from Batistuta's top knuckle down to his palm and then back. "And Benjamin, he also called me and said that he would be lonely if I didn't go to the French team."

Batty raised an eyebrow.

"I think you already have the answer." He said, "Think about it carefully. In that paragraph just now, you mentioned France and Spain so many times. If you think about it clearly, you won't be confused anymore."

Lucas was stunned.

"I--"

Just then, Manchester United scored a goal through Pogba.

Fernandinho passed the ball from the backcourt a little slowly and was intercepted by Augustus who counterattacked. The ball was hoisted into the penalty area. Kompany accidentally let Pogba pass and the French midfielder scored with a header.

"Don't worry, it's just one goal, it's not a big problem." Lucas whispered to comfort Batistuta, but he was actually talking to himself.

In the second half, Manchester United obviously changed their strategy, increasing the connection between the flanks and midfield, trying to attack through crosses and high points.

And it turned out that Mourinho's strategy worked.

One minute after Pogba scored, Manchester United counterattacked again. Pogba took the ball in the midfield and moved it to the left. Ashley Young came up, but Otamendi didn't notice Augustus coming in from behind. Augustus received Pogba's cross from the wing and headed the ball into the net again.

2-2! Manchester United equalized the score!

"What the hell!" Batty stood up suddenly and walked to the sidelines. "What are you doing? Are you slacking off after two goals in the first half? How did you let him get the ball in that position? Nico! Watch behind you!"

Guardiola had no time to talk about Batistuta anymore. What he had to do now was to make good use of the three substitutions to correct the mistakes on the field.

However, before he could make a decision, the situation suddenly changed. Manchester United broke through Manchester City's defense with a set piece and reversed the score 3-2 with Smalling's goal!
Now Manchester City is in a panic.

If the current score continues to the end, the gap between the two teams will be narrowed to 15 points, and Manchester City's dream of winning the home championship 6 rounds in advance will be shattered. There is even the possibility of a crash at the end of the season and failure to achieve success.

Mourinho on the other side raised his hand to encourage the Manchester United fans who had travelled far away to boost their morale. Guardiola on this side tightly grasped the tactical board in his hand, cursed a few times at the grass, and then walked towards the bench.

"Bati, Kevin, Kun, get ready to play."

……

With more than twenty minutes left, Manchester City was trailing 2-3. If they wanted to win the championship early, they had to score two more goals. It has to be said that this was difficult, but there was still a chance.

"Think about Barcelona. Last year, they scored two big comebacks in the last five minutes. We can do it, too." Aguero whispered to Batistuta before going on the court, "Believe in yourself, stay calm, we will get the victory back." "He's right, stay calm." De Bruyne hooked Batistuta's neck and kissed his temples, "We still have time, don't worry."

Batty's eyes darkened and he nodded silently.

Of course, he is not in a hurry.

This is Al-Ittihad. Want to reverse the situation? Ask your dear Batistuta whether he agrees.

……

After the substitution, Manchester City's frontcourt was obviously alive, but Manchester United's momentum had already been formed, and they launched a fierce fight against Manchester City in the midfield. Batistuta originally wanted to stay in the frontcourt and wait for an opportunity, but seeing that the midfield was in a passive position, he had to retreat to help.

As the key player being marked, whenever Batistuta got the ball he would be surrounded, and the smoke of the Manchester derby would begin to spread.

This also led to a conflict between the two sides in the 75th minute.

Batistuta took the ball in the middle and turned to break through. Pogba couldn't resist it at the first try and accelerated back, trying to use the advantage of physical confrontation to interfere with Batistuta's pass without committing a foul.

Batistuta, who was already extremely unhappy about being overtaken by the score, was so angry after this that he reached back and pushed Pogba hard while running.

"Hey!"

Pogba lost his balance and fell backwards, subconsciously reaching out to grab the nearest object to keep his balance. Batistuta certainly didn't want to provide him with "help" and tried to hide sideways.

And it was on this side that Pogba's grabbing changed from Batistuta's arm to the jersey on Batistuta's chest... and the nipple under the jersey.

"Damn you bitch!!"

With a "sizzle" sound, the whole world saw Batistuta's jersey being torn and his nipple swelling under the jersey at a speed visible to the naked eye.

hiss--

All the audience, both men and women, gasped in empathy.

This... must be so painful.

But, um, the honey-colored skin matches the scars next to it.

It’s so astringent.

In a forum far away on the other side of the ocean, a real-time comment is rapidly becoming the top trending search with an average of 50 likes per second.

[Super invincible milk grabbing dragon grabber? ? ? ? ]

……

Although Pogba apologized repeatedly, his expression of trying not to laugh almost made Batistuta fight with him. Augustus did not make any trouble, but he did not hide his thumbs up to Pogba at all.

Guardiola angrily accused Pogba of being a hooligan, and at the same time pulled a Manchester City jacket to block the camera for Batistuta so that the team doctor could spray him with pain-relieving spray.

After changing into a new jersey, Batistuta had the honor of becoming the first player in Premier League history to treat a nipple injury on the sidelines.

The only consolation for him was that Pogba's catch gave Manchester City a free kick in the middle of the frontcourt.

De Bruyne and D Silva gathered around.

"Uh, do you want this?" D scratched his hair and looked at Batistuta with sympathy in his eyes.

Barty nodded sullenly.

"I will shoot directly," he said to De Bruyne and D Silva, covering his mouth, "help me divert attention and make them think it is a tactical free kick."

"Are you sure?" De Bruyne asked, "This distance is not too close, it's still quite straight. With De Gea's ability..."

Batty interrupted him.

"I'm absolutely sure and certain." He said, gently touching the area around his chest. It was still so painful and burning, just like the fire of his anger. "Believe me, I have a score to settle with them!"

De Bruyne and D. Silva understood and retreated to the outside. D. Silva pretended to gesture to the players in front of the goal to move forward, while De Bruyne secretly signaled his teammates to move back.

Of course, both of these are smoke screens.

"Behind! Who's guarding Kompany? Go back!"

Sure enough, Manchester United was fooled. Ashley Young instructed his teammates to keep an eye on Manchester City's high point one second before Batistuta took the free kick.

However, Batistuta's ball went straight towards the goal.

[The ball went in! Batistuta! After being assaulted by a 'breast grope', Manchester City's Brazilian Rose vented all her anger on this free kick! ! 3-3! Manchester City tied the score! The possibility of winning the championship at home is back! ]

After scoring the goal, Batistuta made a V sign with the back of his hand facing outward to the Manchester United players (especially Pogba). In the UK, this represents insult and provocation, and the subtext is simple and crude: Fuck off!

In the 77th minute, Batistuta scored directly from a free kick.

With a quarter of an hour left, it remains unknown whether Manchester City can fight back and win the championship at home.

(End of this chapter)