Who wants to be a male model after being reborn? I want to be a male god.

Chapter 372 If only there were stars in the sky
"Actually, I have something to say to you." Lan Qiu Sheng put down his chopsticks, his voice so soft that it was almost inaudible.

Xu Wen also put down his chopsticks and looked at her intently.

The light in the box cast soft shadows on his chiseled face, making him look even gentler than usual.

Lan Qiu Sheng suddenly remembered the corners of his mouth drooping slightly when he talked about his childhood that day.

Thinking of his neatly manicured nails as he handed me the shirt.

I also recall the countless nights when the two of us worked side by side under the lights of his office late at night.

"I" Lan Qiusheng's fingers twisted together unconsciously.

At this moment, the door of the box was suddenly pushed open.

They both turned around at the same time and saw Yang Yiyao standing at the door with an awkward but polite smile on her face: "Oh, what a coincidence, you guys are eating here too?"

Lan Qiusheng's face turned pale instantly.

Xu Wen raised an eyebrow: "Senior? Why are you here?"

"I just finished talking about something next door and saw you guys when I passed by." Yang Yiyao's eyes wandered between the two of them, finally landing on Lan Qiu Sheng's almost untouched plate.

She pointed to the dining table and said, "Do you mind if I join in? I just happen to have something to discuss with Xu Wen."

Lan Qiusheng lowered her head, her long hair hanging down to cover her expression. She said stiffly, "Hello, senior sister."

She felt as if the photo in her pocket weighed a thousand pounds.

That was proof that she had mustered up all her courage to confess, but now it has become a secret forever.

Outside the window, night had completely fallen, and her carefully dressed appearance was reflected on the glass, but no one appreciated her.

Xu Wen looked at Lan Qiusheng, then at Yang Yiyao, and finally said calmly: "If you want to come, sit down."

His voice was as gentle as ever, but it made Lan Qiusheng feel a chill to the bone.

The warmth that the two shared on that rainy day seemed as if it had never existed.

When Yang Yiyao pulled out the chair and sat down, the chair legs made a harsh sound as they rubbed against the floor.

She deliberately placed her bag on the table, and the sound of metal chains colliding broke the stagnant air in the box.

"Are you talking about work?" she asked.

Yang Yiyao ventured in with only one thought in mind.

That is to change the topic of the evening elsewhere.

There is a little bit of selfishness in this, but more of it is a feeling of "can't bear it".

Once some words are spoken, they can never be taken back.

Xu Wen glanced at Yang Yiyao and replied calmly, "Nothing, it's just that we're going to have a freshman orientation soon."

"Welcoming new students? I'm familiar with this. I used to be the president of the student union, and I personally oversaw the welcoming process." She looked at Lan Qiu Sheng with a smile, waving her arms.

Lan Qiusheng twisted the napkin tightly between her fingers under the table, and the cloth wrinkled in her palm.

She nodded mechanically, but her eyes involuntarily glanced at Xu Wen.

Xu Wen was pouring tea for Yang Yiyao. The lines of his profile were soft in the steam, and there was nothing unusual about it.

"What freshmen care about most are dormitory allocation and course selection system. I remember when Xu Wen spoke as a representative of freshmen last year, the girls in the audience were all stunned." Yang Yiyao took the teacup.

She deliberately led the topic in a light-hearted direction, but her eyes were fixed on Lan Qiu Sheng's reaction.

Perhaps if she suppressed Lan Qiusheng's impulse here, she could prevent her from suffering further harm.

I won't be as deeply trapped in it as she is.

By the time she came to her senses, it was too late.

Lan Qiu Sheng's eyelashes trembled slightly, casting a small shadow under the light.

She remembered the warmth left on Xu Wen's shirt on the day of the heavy rain, and her obsession with washing that shirt countless times. Now all of this seemed as fragile as bubbles.

"You're joking, senior. I remember you were the focus of the whole audience during the orientation last year." Xu Wen's voice was as gentle as usual.

Yang Yiyao waved her hands exaggeratedly: "Don't mention it. It was terribly hot that day and I almost had heat stroke. If it wasn't for the school's request, I wouldn't want to go."

She turned to Lan Qiusheng and continued, "By the way, how are you going to arrange the volunteers this year? I remember you took the initiative to stay and help last year."

Lan Qiusheng opened his mouth, but found his throat so dry that he couldn't make a sound.

She picked up the teacup and took a sip. The warm liquid slid down her throat, but it couldn't quench the burning sensation in her chest.

"We plan to assign volunteers by dormitory." Her voice was so soft that it was almost inaudible.

At this moment, the box door was pushed open again.

Ding Yue rushed in, followed by a few girls who pretended to be friends.

Her eyes quickly swept over the three people present, and her pupils shrank slightly when she saw Lan Qiu Sheng's pale face.

"Oh, what a coincidence! I was out playing with my friends and happened to see an acquaintance." Ding Yue exclaimed exaggeratedly and walked straight to Lan Qiu Sheng and sat down.

Her hand quietly held Lan Qiusheng's cold fingers under the table and felt his slight trembling.

Xu Wen's gaze wandered between several people, finally stopping on Ding Yue.

The corners of his mouth curled up in an arc of understanding: "Would you like more food?"

It was a love game between children, and he only needed to take a glance to know today's plot.

"No, no, we've already eaten. We just came over to say hello." Ding Yue waved her hand, but her eyes were fixed on Lan Qiu Sheng.

The atmosphere in the box became weird.

Yang Yiyao continued to talk incessantly about the things to pay attention to when welcoming the new students. Ding Yue interrupted from time to time, and several "friends" smiled in cooperation.

Lan Qiu Sheng sat in the center of the storm, feeling like he was being pulled by two forces. On one side was the normal atmosphere deliberately created by Yang Yiyao, and on the other side was Ding Yue's silent encouragement.

Xu Wen suddenly stood up: "I want to go out and get some fresh air."

He glanced at Lan Qiusheng and then asked, "Want to join us?"

It's time to end this farce tonight.

Lan Qiusheng looked up suddenly and met Xu Wen's calm eyes.

She wasn't sure if he saw through everything, but at this moment she urgently needed to escape from this suffocating box.

"Okay." She replied softly. When she stood up, her knee hit the corner of the table. The pain made her a little more awake.

The two walked out of the restaurant one after the other. The summer night breeze was slightly cool.

Xu Wen did not stop, but took her to a park not far away.

The sound of square dance music came from afar, and the cheerful rhythm formed a sharp contrast with Lan Qiusheng's heavy heartbeat.

They sat down on a bench, surrounded by children playing and old people dancing.

A street lamp cast a dim light overhead, and moths hovered in the halo.

"It's so noisy here that no one will pay attention to what we say." Xu Wen said softly.

"I" Lan Qiu Sheng's voice was choked in his throat, his eyes fixed on a mottled mark on the ground.

Xu Wen did not urge him, but just waited quietly.

The music of "The Most Dazzling National Style" came from afar, and the neat dance steps of the aunties were as regular as their heartbeats.

Lan Qiusheng took a deep breath, raised her head and looked directly into Xu Wen's eyes. She seemed to have finally made up her mind and blurted out without hesitation: "I like you."

Lan Qiusheng's voice was very soft, but very clear: "I liked you from the first time I saw you. I fell in love with you at first sight."

She recalled the first time she met Xu Wen downstairs at her mother's house.

At that time she felt a palpitation in her chest, but she didn't understand what this feeling was.

Xu Wen's expression did not change, and there was no surprise in his eyes.

"Every day with you is happy, but also painful." Lan Qiusheng continued, his voice gradually becoming firm.

She remembered what Yu's mother had said, the woman who had saved her from hell.

Lan Qiusheng relayed what she said to Xu Wen: "Mother Yu said that you are the Milky Way in the sky, and I can never touch you."

She looked over Xu Wen's shoulder and towards the dark night sky: "But as long as I can see the Milky Way in the sky every night, I will be very happy, just like when I was a child watching the stars at home."

Her voice was a little choked up. "It would be nice if there were stars in the sky right now. Unfortunately, the city lights are flashing and there is not a single star in the sky."

When the last word was spoken, Lan Qiu Sheng felt an unprecedented sense of relief, as if he had unloaded a heavy burden that he had been carrying for a long time.

The music of the square dance happened to switch to "The Moon Represents My Heart", which was so absurd that it made her want to laugh.

She gritted her teeth and said what she had to say: "I know you will never belong to me alone, but I will be satisfied even if you can give me a little bit of your love."

When saying this, Lan Qiusheng felt that he had been humbled to the dust.

But love makes people humble.

After listening to Lan Qiusheng's confession, Xu Wen was silent for a moment.

The night breeze blew through his hair, and the music from the square dance in the distance gradually became blurred, as if the whole world had quieted down.

He looked at the stubborn girl in front of him. The light in her eyes reminded him of himself in his previous life.

"I've been through this stage before." Xu Wen spoke softly, his voice carrying a hint of heaviness of memories.

His thoughts drifted back to his college life before his rebirth.

Those dark days flashed through my mind like a revolving lantern.

I get up at five in the morning every day and go to the school cafeteria to work part-time before morning classes.

During lunch break, I hurriedly ate a few mouthfuls of the cold lunch box and rushed to work at the convenience store.

After getting off work at 10 o'clock in the evening, I still have to force myself to review my homework despite feeling sleepy.

Life at that time was like a marathon with no end in sight, and every step felt heavy as if it were filled with lead.

"Other people's lives are full of excitement every day, with dating, traveling and parties. But my life is full of pressure." Xu Wen's eyes fell on the children playing in the distance, and a bitter smile appeared at the corner of his mouth.

He remembers pretending to be uninterested when his roommates discussed newly released movies.

Whenever the class organizes an outing, he always makes excuses.

Those seemingly insignificant campus pleasures were an unattainable luxury for him.

Lan Qiu Sheng listened quietly, his fingers twisted together unconsciously.

She thought of the past that Xu Wen had told her about, and their similar childhood experiences.

Only those who have experienced it personally know how painful life was at that time.

"If someone came forward at that time and helped me in life and career, I would definitely fall in love with that person." Xu Wen's voice became low and his eyes became deep.

This is not a hypothesis, but his personal experience.

He recalled the story with Gu Xingruo in his previous life.

The touching feelings and dependence at that time gradually fermented into the so-called "love" later.

"This relationship was unequal from the beginning." Xu Wen tapped his fingers, and the rhythm miraculously overlapped with the drum beats of the square dance in the distance.

The night wind suddenly became stronger, ruffling Lan Qiusheng's long hair. She subconsciously reached out to smooth her hair.

After rebirth, Xu Wen rejected everything. He no longer needed charity, but relied on himself to climb up step by step.

Now that he had his own career, he could stand before her as an equal, no longer a pitiful creature who needed to be saved.

The sense of relief brought by this change was something he had never experienced in his previous life.

"This love is fake and not real." Xu Wen turned to Lan Qiu Sheng and his tone became extremely serious.

He looked at her slightly red eyes and remembered himself in his previous life who was always humble in front of Gu Xingruo.

That feeling mixed with gratitude and dependence is more like the instinct of a drowning person to grab a piece of driftwood than love.

"You are very outstanding and should pursue your own life." Xu Wen's voice softened, as if he was persuading the shadow of his past life.

He thought of Lan Qiu Sheng's persistence in climbing 17 flights of stairs to deliver the report, how she looked professional despite being soaked in the heavy rain, and the shocking scar on her left arm.

These are all proofs of her strong character and should not be obscured by so-called "love".

Xu Wen always jokes that Lan Qiu Sheng is the "chosen worker", but it is undeniable that she is really outstanding.

It is obviously the same situation, but he is better than in his previous life.

The sound of children playing came from the distance. A little girl fell down and her companions immediately ran over to help her.

This simple interaction reminded Xu Wen of his current daily life with Gu Xingruo.

The eldest daughter is no longer a condescending benefactor, but an ordinary girl who can show weakness and make mistakes.

This kind of equal relationship is the foundation of a healthy relationship.

"Dependence can become an addiction, and sober depravity is the most desperate." Xu Wen said slowly after taking a deep breath.

He thought of his gradually numb self in his previous life: from the initial shame to the later getting used to it, and finally even learning to ask for it actively.

The process of the soul being corroded bit by bit is more terrifying than any physical pain.

A scent of flowers wafted in the wind. Xu Wen took a deep breath and continued, "Love should be about two people becoming better together and achieving each other."

His eyes swept over a white-haired old couple not far away who were walking together, supporting each other.

"Otherwise, excessive dependence will only backfire on the future of both of you." Xu Wen's voice almost turned into a soliloquy.

He remembered what Gu Hong said in his previous life.

Xu Wen had no way to refute and could only remain silent.

Because what Gu Hong said was right, his relationship with Gu Xingruo was based on unequal charity from the very beginning and was destined to not end well.

Girls tend to be more prone to depravity and taking shortcuts than boys.

Xu Wen didn't want to see such an outstanding Lan Qiu Sheng become like this in front of him.

The park's fountain suddenly began to perform, with the water columns rising and falling in time with the music.

Xu Wen looked at the changing lights in the water curtain and continued to persuade: "Some things cannot be beautified into love."

The last piece of music ended and the fountain slowly died down.

Xu Wen let out a long sigh, as if he had unloaded a burden that had been weighing on him for many years.

He turned to look at Lan Qiu Sheng and found that there were stubborn tears flashing in her eyes, just like himself in his previous life who tried to maintain his dignity in front of Gu Hong.

"You have a long future ahead of you." Xu Wen said softly.

(End of this chapter)