From the end of the world

Chapter 348 I am yours
Between the suggestions given to me by Xiaowan and Zhu Shi, I finally adopted Zhu Shi's suggestion and expressed my feelings directly to Ma Zao.

Looking at Ma Zao's dazed expression, I still felt a little uneasy and hesitant.

There are more than one abnormality in the relationship between Ma Zao and me. It's not just the age gap, the unequal power relationship between us also makes this confession seem like a strong person demanding from a weak person. In addition, I didn't always have good intentions towards Ma Zao. It's better to say that for a long time, I always had very bad intentions towards Ma Zao.

Even though I told Ma Zao some time ago that I was pursuing her, and she was overjoyed, it doesn't mean that the incident has no negative impact on the present. On the contrary, if I suddenly tell her that I like her and expect her feedback, will she think that if she gives a negative answer, she will be ignored by me, or even abandoned by me in the future?

She so much hopes that there will be someone who can accept everything about her. So when this person reveals unexpected feelings towards her, will she be forced to give an answer against her will under pressure?

I don't know. In fact, I haven't made enough preparations myself, and I don't know what specific preparations should be made. But just like the battle I will face next, many things can only be grasped in the process of practice. Keep thinking that I am not ready yet and have not yet ushered in the perfect opportunity, which will only delay it more and more until it ends in vain.

On the other hand, although I put pressure on myself to "have to do it", I still don't want to put pressure on Ma Zao.

Maybe it has been like this since a long time ago. When I see my friends around me happy, I will relax; and when I see Ma Zao's happy smile after eating delicious food, I will also share the joy. Thinking of it this way, my good impression of her is indeed not only based on her unlucky physique. However, this alone is probably not enough.

Maybe part of me hoped that she would reject my confession. Because my affection and cleanliness are completely opposite, and I might even choose the latter over "her happiness" and "my desire". If her answer can help me give up, I can go back to being the person who only thinks about how to use her. How easy it would be.

Ma Zao showed a hesitant expression, and seeing this, I added: "I just want to express my true thoughts, and I don't necessarily want you to give feedback now. This happened suddenly, and you may find it difficult to sort out your emotions. If you find it difficult to respond, it's okay to put this topic aside for now."

She shook her head and asked, "Zhuang Cheng, do you really like me?"

"I'm not going to lie to you," I said.

"In other words, you want to do...that kind of thing with me?" she asked hesitantly.

"I can't say that I don't have that kind of thought at all, but I'm not confessing to you for that kind of thing. This is also what I really think," I said.

"Why? Compared to me, Zhu Shi is much better." She said unconfidently, "Compared to Zhu Shi, I am like a child, and it would not be comfortable to hold my body.

"I don't know much about modern society, I'm not interesting to talk about, and I have a very dark personality. When other people are around, I often don't know what to say and can only pretend that I don't exist.

"In less than a year, Zhu Shi will probably be able to use the power of the Great Impermanence, and he will be able to help you a lot in the future. And every time when you fight, I can only hide far away. Obviously, you will fight hard for me next, but I can't help you at all.

"Zhu Shi and her grandfather know a lot of people in Luoshan, and they can help you anchor yourself in the strange world in the future. I don't know anyone except you and Zhu Shi, and you won't be able to get to know more people if you stay with me..."

Her tone became less and less confident. It was strange, why did she compare herself to Zhu Shi so frequently? Could it be that she wanted me to be with Zhu Shi? It's not that I have no illusions about Zhu Shi, but overall, I am more inclined to regard Zhu Shi as my friend.

As she spoke later, she showed a frustrated expression: "Besides...if you have that kind of relationship with me, you will be regarded as a pervert by others."

"It doesn't matter, I'm just a pervert," I said.

"Huh?" She was stunned.

"Xiao Wan and Zhu Shi both said this to me. Although I was a little bothered at first, I've let it go now. If liking a girl like you is a pervert, then I am a pervert." I said, "Ma Zao, I heard from Xiao Wan that you have seen a lot of terrible people and things in the doomsday era, so you hate this kind of thing. Maybe in your eyes, I am no different from those people, but I still want to ask, are you willing to accept me?"

"I feel those people are disgusting, but for you..."

Ma Zao looked at me with complicated eyes for a long time, and then said: "Zhuang Cheng...can you hug me?"

It was not the first time that I hugged Ma Zao. She had hugged me from behind before. Since she asked me to do so, I did not hesitate or shy and slowly hugged her body. She paused for a moment and then hugged me in return.

"...If only it could always be like this." She sighed as if from the bottom of her heart.

Obviously, she had given her answer. I felt my heartbeat and joy explode together, tangled together and turned into a mess. Then slowly, little by little, I regained my composure in the embrace.

After a long while, we separated. She seemed to have thought about a lot of things, looked into my eyes, and said, "Zhuang Cheng... can you give me some more time?"

"Time?" I asked.

She said: "I still don't want others to look at you with strange eyes. Although I don't mind being looked at with strange eyes..."

"I don't mind either," I said.

"But I can't stand it if others look at you like that. So, can you give me some more time? At least, um..."

She touched her body, thought for a while and said, "At least wait until I grow up to be as comfortable to hug as Zhu Shi, then we can become true lovers. Is this okay? ... Or do you like me better now?

"Although my power of regression cannot accelerate my growth, once I grow, I can change back and forth between my pre-growth form and my post-growth form. If you are not satisfied at that time and think that my childhood self is more attractive, I can also change back to my childhood self at any time."

Although I admit that I am a pervert, I am not only attracted to Ma Zao now. As I mentioned before, I also had fantasies about Zhu Shi, so I think my sexual orientation is still within the range of normal and healthy men. Of course, I have no objection to Ma Zao's current proposal.

"Yes, I can," I said, "So, what is our relationship now?"

When people who are not married agree to be together for life, they are considered to be engaged. But when people agree to be together before they officially fall in love, what kind of relationship is that?

"I don't know either." Ma Zao said, "But I'm already yours."

As she said this, she seemed to feel shy to say this, and hugged me again, hiding her blushing face in my chest.
-
It was indeed the right thing to follow Zhu Shi's advice. A roundabout strategy might be suitable for ordinary situations, but it is not suitable for me. The direct ball tactic of cutting through the Gordian knot is what I should do most.

I confessed my feelings to Ma Zao, and she accepted me. As a gift before the battle, there is no better gift than this.

Now I am almost ready to leave. Seeing me turn around and leave, Ma Zao couldn't help showing a worried look. However, she should know that she can't persuade me. Even if I go this time, I am destined to lose more than I win, especially in her opinion, I am fighting for her this time, but she can't join the battle, which will undoubtedly make her heart more tormented.

Ma Zao closed her eyes, took a deep breath, and then exhaled. When she opened her eyes again, her expression had become firm.

"——Zhuang Cheng, you must win." she said.

The best encouragement for me is that she can say such a blessing to me.

I felt as if a huge power was injected into my heart, and the shadow of Fate Turbidity instantly disappeared in my heart. Although I still couldn't figure out how I should defeat Fate Turbidity, I didn't feel that I would lose at all.

People who don't know me well think that I challenged the fate turbidity because I had some chance of winning; while people who know me well think that I had no chance of winning from the beginning. Even I myself can't imagine a way to win.

If I really win, it will definitely surprise a lot of people.

Then I'll try to beat him once.

I said goodbye to Ma Zao and came to the lobby on the first floor of the hotel. Lu Chan was standing there waiting for me. Our eyes met, and he turned around tacitly and led me out the door.

Under his familiar guidance, we quickly moved away from the hotel and headed towards the outermost area of ​​Luoshan headquarters. The surrounding scenery gradually became deserted, and after a while, Lu Chan took me to a huge building.

He looked at the building with a look of nostalgia and hatred, then turned to me and said, "This is where the life turbidity is. He is probably in the deepest part of this building now."

(End of this chapter)