From the end of the world

Chapter 337 Zhu Shi's Heart 1
After consulting Zhu Shi about the issues related to Ma Zao last time, I did not report the follow-up progress to Zhu Shi. It is reasonable for me to summarize the progress on my side and make a report.

Since she wanted to talk to me about interpersonal relationships to help me relax, I took the initiative to cooperate, hoping that she would not worry. Moreover, I did have some troublesome issues that I wanted to continue to consult her about, and ask her thoughts as a woman.

It wasn't long before I had a clear account of my progress and obstacles.

"Hmm, so that's how it is. Ma already knew the real purpose of your pestering her, which was because of her bad luck... and not only did she not hate you, but she also formed a better relationship with you and treated you as a unique and important person..." Zhu Shi said happily, "You did a great job, Brother Zhuang!"

"But I still have some questions..." I said.

"How does Maha see you? Right? She may just see you as an irreplaceable good partner, but not necessarily as a love interest. And you have that kind of idea about Maha..."

As he spoke, Zhu Shi suppressed his joy and revealed a strange expression: "To be honest, Senior Brother Zhuang, I still think that your pursuit of a girl of Ma Zao's age is a little... not right, or maybe not very perverted?
"Ma Zao also said that he spent an unknown amount of time in the apocalypse. Maybe it looks like that, but it's actually very legal..."

She first whispered in confusion, then raised her head and looked at me for a long time, and finally sighed as if giving up.

"... Never mind. I'll just support you." She said resignedly.

I said unexpectedly: "I thought you would miss me for a while longer."

"If you think about it carefully, Ma Zao's most ideal partner is indeed no one other than you," she said.

Xiaowan seemed to have said something similar.

I am indeed very confident about this. Apart from me, who else can accept everything that Ma Zao has done? No one, absolutely no one, how could there be anyone. If there is, I will secretly eliminate it. So I am flawless.

"At least I can't imagine that after missing you, Ma Zao will have the chance to be so lucky to meet another person who can accept all the good and bad about her. As for the age issue, it won't be a problem as long as a few years pass. There is only a five or six year age difference between you and Ma Zao. If another ten or twenty years pass, it won't be a problem at all."

Zhu Shi seemed to have convinced himself, and continued: "Well, let's get back to your question... Well, isn't this problem easy to solve?"

"Easy to solve?" I wondered.

"Yeah, can't you just play it straight as always?" She said as a matter of course, "Just confess to Ma Zao directly, and then ask her in person if she likes you too, or if she can accept your feelings...won't everything be revealed this way?"

"Wait, wait, this is completely different from what Xiaowan said, and what the other person said." I said, "Ma Zao hates the opposite sex who likes little girls like her. She may have seen some pretty bad scenes in the apocalypse, so she hates this kind of thing.

"There may still be room for mediation if we don't break this window paper now. Once everything is exposed, we may really lose the opportunity in that regard. Instead of doing that, it is better to wait for a few years to pass as you said just now, and then express your feelings when there is no problem..."

Zhu Shi said bluntly: "Brother Zhuang, can you really wait until then? I am not doubting your patience, but since your wish is to pursue a grand adventure where you don't know when you will die, does that kind of long-term plan measured in years really suit your temperament? You yourself don't think you can delay it for a few years, right?"

It seems that unlike the conservative Xiaowan, Zhu Shi is a radical.

"Then, if it's as Xiaowan said, the result of a rash confession is failure..." I said.

"Oh, what does that little girl know about love! She hasn't even graduated from elementary school yet. You still have to listen to my love strategist Zhu Shi!" Zhu Shi said confidently, "I am a serious female college student and have read hundreds of romance novels. From high school to college, I have witnessed my friends and friends of friends getting married and breaking up one after another. I have witnessed countless love, hate, and vengeance. I have a lot of experience!"

No, “that kind of little girl” must be you.

And you obviously have no romantic feelings, how can you call yourself a love strategist? Xiaowan is more qualified than you in this regard. Does reading hundreds of romance novels count as love experience? Although you say that you have witnessed countless love and hate, that is all about your friends and friends of friends.

Before I could blurt out these inappropriate words, my attention was drawn to another thing. "You actually read romance novels?" I couldn't help but ask out of curiosity.

"Yes, I just don't have any romantic feelings... or rather, I just can't have romantic feelings for others, not that I really can't understand what love is. Maybe it's because I know I've lost love, so I'm curious and want to know what love is in the eyes of others." Zhu Shi analyzed himself, "In fact, if others read a story that feels sweet, I will also find it sweet; if others read a story that feels heartbreaking, I will also feel heartbroken.

"I don't feel that the fact of 'losing love' will make me unable to empathize with the characters in the story, or with the audience outside the story when facing such plots. If I had not really never been attracted to any member of the opposite sex, I would even doubt whether I had really lost love... It is also possible that the concept of love is a product created by civilization, so even if I lose this kind of emotion, I will not encounter any problems in life.

"Some friends even come to me for advice on relationship issues, and the advice I give them sometimes helps!"

For example, me? Actually, Zhu Shi suggested that I play the straight ball to Ma Zao last time, and I did succeed. Could it be that people who have no love relationship can be more straightforward in dealing with love affairs?

"That is to say, although you can experience love from the story through empathy, you can't do it when it comes to yourself..." I said, "Your symptoms sound like those of a group of people on the Internet who are overly obsessed with virtual characters and can't fall in love with real people. I remember their name was Er..."

"No, no! It's not like that!" Zhu Shi quickly waved his hands to clarify, "I can also empathize with the feeling of love from my friends in real life. For example, when your relationship with Ma Zao was deepening, I actually felt a little... uh."

She closed her mouth reflexively as if something had been exposed, and at the same time carefully peeked at my expression. What she meant was that if I were in a relationship with Ma Zao, she would feel like she was also in a relationship, so was she in a relationship with Ma Zao from my perspective, or was she in a relationship with me from Ma Zao's perspective? Or was it both sides?

Could it be that the love she thought she was experiencing was just her imagination, and not the same as the actual love? It seems that many people have said that love in reality is completely different from love in romance stories. Before falling in love, who can understand the taste of love just by imagination?

Zhu Shi has doubted whether humans are really born with the feeling of love. Although I don't think love is completely fictitious, in modern civilization, the concept of love must contain many acquired and cultural elements, making it too complicated, and causing people to have different definitions of love. Once love is completely deconstructed, it will be easily interpreted as a mixture of reproductive desire and cooperative consciousness, which is no longer what people call love.

Thinking of this, I suddenly realized a fatal problem.

Ma Zao might be even more unable to understand what love is than Zhu Shi.

Growing up in the apocalyptic era, she may not have the modern view of love. Or in other words, the environment she experienced in the past did not have the soil to construct the concept of love. Before coming to the modern world, she may not have heard of the word love. Even if she had heard of it, her understanding of this "unique feeling between men and women" may be a deconstructed meaning, that is, a mixture of reproductive desire and cooperative consciousness.

Since she and I are already inseparable partners, if I express my true feelings to her on this basis, will she directly understand that I just want to do that kind of thing with her?
I remembered her reaction when I hinted my true feelings to her in the past... She was very nervous at the time, and subconsciously compared her body shape with that of adult women, thinking that she was not plump enough... Could it be that she was thinking directly in that direction?
"...Actually, there is another very important question." Zhu Shi said, "Before you confess your feelings to Ma Zao, I must make it clear to you."

"Are there any other obstacles?" I asked.

"It's hard to say whether it's an obstacle or not, but the problem is not with Ma Zao, but with you." Zhu Shi looked at me seriously.

"Is there something wrong with me?" I wondered.

Zhu Shi stared at me for a while, then asked a question.

A question I had never thought about.

"If one day, Ma has lost his jinx physique...

"No, let me ask it another way. If one day, you encounter an opportunity to help Ma Zao get rid of his bad luck physique——

"Will you help her?"

(End of this chapter)