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Chapter 19: Didn’t hold it in well
Late at night, Xie Hushan sat on the steps in front of the Medicine King Temple with his legs stretched straight forward. It was not an easy job to ride a bicycle and carry four female teachers in turn to "go around the county" for an entire afternoon.

"Commander Xie, you are such a piece of shit!" Han Hongbing sat next to him but did not comfort him. Instead, he cursed with regret: "I said you would rather run to the county town and get tired to death than go to the military camp. You say you are a brother, but you think you are a boss!"

Before Han Hongbing left for the military camp in the morning, he felt a little sorry for Xie Hushan. Now that he thought about it, this beast even schemed against his own buddies.

He, the principal, the teachers and the children took a cart to deliver tofu, vermicelli and popsicles to the military camp. The People's Liberation Army was very enthusiastic and had made preparations long ago. They specially arranged a class of soldiers to accompany the students in the social activities.

When the leader heard that the village production team wanted some farm manure, he agreed immediately and even asked the soldiers to help collect the manure. They transported fifteen truckloads of manure back.

Han Hongbing originally thought that there was no problem, thinking that he was kind-hearted by bringing people to help clean the toilet. But not long after the manure truck had left, a soldier in an apron rushed out waving a large spoon, as if he wanted to talk to him. But before he could finish his sentence, he was picked up by a group of soldiers who were chewing popsicles, with his mouth blocked by the popsicle, and carried back to the house sobbing.

This made Han Hongbing unable to figure out what was going on.

At the end of the party, the soldiers gave the children a surprise and sent the children who had never ridden in a car back to Zhongping Commune in a Jiefang bus.

After the two sides said goodbye, the principal of the elementary school quietly extracted the truth from a young soldier and told Han Hongbing that although this military camp was a temporary base and had no farm, the basic food supply for the soldiers was guaranteed by the local armed forces, but the soldiers in the kitchen squad had opened up a few acres of land nearby as a small vegetable garden. They wanted to grow some seasonal vegetables for self-sufficiency, and they used the fertilizer in the camp toilet to fertilize the vegetables.

When the cook first learned that the farmers had come to transport some manure, he thought that they would only take away some of it. He thought that it was natural for the farmers to use some manure, and that the farmers were kind and would definitely understand the principle of leaving room for manure, so they would be able to leave some for the cook. After all, it was only a small vegetable garden of a few acres, so even one truck would be enough.

As a result, the people of the third production team of Zhongping Village were really honest. Not only did they use 15 trucks to transport away all the stock from the two toilets, but they also used water to flush the toilets clean. When the cook went to the toilet and came out, his face was as red as a cucumber. He raised a big spoon and yelled:

"Ten bundles of vermicelli, ten plates of tofu and five hundred popsicles were exchanged for the farm manure accumulated by hundreds of people! There was nothing left for me! They didn't get it for socializing, they got it for robbery! The toilet is cleaner than my face! The locusts passing through the border are not as bad as these villagers!"

"Give them back the vermicelli and tofu, and ask them to return the manure! That guy's name is Han Hongbing, right? Wait, I'll remember you, I'll go and complain to the leader of your commune's armed forces department!"

Han Hongbing rubbed his face and said to Xie Hushan, who was too tired to open his eyes:
"You are such a bastard, so wicked... It was clearly you who planned it, but now the whole army camp remembers that there was a kid named Han Hongbing in Zhongping Village who took away 15 carts of manure. The head of the cooking squad said that if I dare to go there again, the sentry will arrest me and lock me in their toilet, feeding me croton seeds every day, and they will let me go when I have taken 15 carts."

"You have made personal sacrifices for the collective interests of the team. The majority of members will remember you. When the time comes, I will organize everyone to bring Croton to see you." Xie Hushan was amused by what Han Hongbing said:
"At worst, you can wait until the corn in the field is full of pulp, then talk to the team and send some cooked young corn and seasonal vegetables to the cook squad leader as an apology. It's a good idea to do it once, but they don't need so much manure in their vegetable garden. This time you've become famous throughout the camp. Next time, bring something to apologize and get to know the cook squad leader better. Then you'll be the one to pick up manure in the two toilets. From now on, you'll be the team's number one manure scoop. No one in the team will dare to offend you and will have to worship you."

"Get out of here! I haven't even married yet. Which girl would want to date me if she hears that I'm a stinky dung scoop?" Han Hongbing cursed with a smile.

Xie Hushan said with disdain: "You are useless. A man should not rush to marry a wife. He must first grow up to be capable. Once you have the ability, matchmakers will knock on your door. You have nothing now, and you have to wait for a girl to choose you. Look at me, why am I not in a hurry to marry..."

"Come on, that's purely because you're poor and no one introduced you to one," Han Hongbing retorted.

Xie Hushan slowly straightened up, and the pain made him gasp. He looked around and saw that Ermianfei had not come back yet, so he complained, "Where the hell is Ermianfei? I'm waiting for him to give me an account, but I can't see him yet." Han Hongbing stood up and reached out to pull Xie Hushan up, "Ermianfei will soon live in our team's manure pit. I'll ride my bike and carry you to visit him?"

Xie Hushan felt that he had recovered some strength after resting for half a day, and nodded: "Let's go and take a look. He is the number one contributor to the third team this time, and all the credit belongs to him."

"Huh? What do you mean?" Han Hongbing's eyes lit up. If his childhood friend said this, he must have been holding it in.

"You'll get scolded. We tricked and coaxed all the children in the village to collect manure, but in the end, all 39 trucks of pure manure went to Team 3. Wouldn't the other teams be jealous? Wouldn't they find an excuse to extort money and make a fuss? Wouldn't they scold the person who came up with this dirty trick? What? Do you want to be scolded for him?" Xie Hushan looked at Han Hongbing:
"Tell me yourself, if everyone asks you, who told you to take the children to the military camp to collect manure, and asked me to take the children to the county town to collect manure? How would you answer?"

Han Hongbing said without hesitation: "Our team leader Ma Laowu asked me to do it."

"Right, so I say he is the number one contributor." Xie Hushan sat on the back of the bicycle and said lazily:

"Ermianfei is the captain, but he has a soft temper and a thin face. This is a disease and needs to be treated."

When Han Hongbing carried Xie Hushan on his back and staggered to the several manure pits of the third team, he was shocked. It was already past ten o'clock in the evening, and there were still dozens of people gathered around the manure pits, shining flashlights here and there and talking about something.

"Laowu, come to my house and have a drink of water?" A production team leader from another team shouted to Ma Laowu.

This was actually a subtle way of talking to Ma Laowu in private to see if he could get some farm manure from Team 3 at a fair price or even at a low price. Unfortunately, Ma Laowu had poor hearing at that time.

Ma Laowu stood by the manure pit, holding his pipe in one hand and his other hand on his waist, looking up with his head held high, and speaking in a loud voice: "That's right, thirty-nine trucks, pure manure! It's just a little expensive, seven yuan a truck! I pawned the pants of my entire team to buy this little fortune!"

When Xie Hushan saw Ma Laowu's expression, he instantly thought of the scene of Wang Yousheng reviewing the troops in the TV series "Drawing Sword".

"From what you said, it was Hu Saner from your team and Xiao Er from the old Han family who bought it. These two kids are really capable. Where did they get so much fat?" Another voice sighed.

Xie Hushan immediately said, "Don't say that, old man. This is all taught by our team leader Uncle Ma Wu. We are just running errands. As for production plans and personnel transfers, my uncle still has to make the decisions!"

Seeing that Han Hongbing hadn't reacted yet, Xie Hushan poked him in the waist and whispered, "Show it!"

"Yes, yes, yes! Hu San'er and I didn't do anything. What can two stupid guys do? We just worked hard and ran errands. The credit should go to whoever it belongs to. In this matter, Uncle Wu deserves the most credit. We will fight wherever Uncle Wu points!" Han Hongbing also spoke loudly to everyone.

Ma Laowu turned the flashlight to shine on the two people cautiously. He knew these two guys too well. Would they be willing to let others take the credit? They were the kind of people who wanted to be the first to eat shit. They must have been holding back their farts.
(End of this chapter)