We agreed to play football together, and you will be the head coach?

Chapter 176: Bird manure awakens, the British Empire; Manchester United brothers, the final word (plus more)

In the 33rd minute, AC Milan, gradually losing patience, played relatively simply and Seedorf tried to kick a long shot but missed.

In the 39th minute, Di Maria hit the wall against Modric and cut inside, then made a diagonal pass to Ribery.

Ribery's shot from the left side of the penalty area was saved by Karachi.

In the 42nd minute, Kaka retreated to receive the ball and was brought down by Modric immediately.

Pirlo took a free kick and looked for his teammates in the penalty area.

Vidic jumped high and headed the ball away.

Carragher then launched a counterattack with a long kick.

Ribery ran with the ball in the frontcourt, stopped the ball with his right chest, and then ate Costacurta alive at explosive speed.

Costacurta wanted to pull Ribery, but Ribery had Adama Baby Oil on his body, so his arms were slippery and he managed to get rid of him.

boom!
Ribery shot the ball straight into the net.

beep!

The referee blew the whistle, but instead of pointing to the center circle, he made a cross with both hands.

The goal is invalid!

"How could the goal be invalid? You're a black whistle! How much money did you receive from Berlusconi!" Guardiola rushed to the sidelines.

After a period of failed coaching, he found his position.

An atmosphere-type head coach may be more suitable for him.

It turned out that the referee believed that Ribery stopped the ball with his right arm, not his right chest, and that it was handball first, so the goal was invalid.

Ribery was so angry that he laughed.

Guardiola also received a yellow card for telling the truth.

Modric spread his hands and glared at the referee.

A minute later, the referee fell to the ground holding his cheek.

Because Modric passed the ball directly to the referee's head without stopping.

The players and staff of Palermo were the first to smile.

The referee's nose was bleeding.

Palermo's team doctor was well-trained and arrived at the sidelines as soon as the incident happened.

This is an internal requirement of Palermo.

No matter who is injured, as long as there is an injury, the team doctor must be on standby immediately.

If there is a serious incident that requires humanitarian assistance, such as a player suffering a cardiac arrest, this may save lives.

But soon, He Tianqi called the team doctor back.

There is no need to provide humanitarian aid for black whistles.

It was merciful not to give him humanitarian destruction.

AC Milan's team doctor came to the sidelines at the urging of Ancelotti.

However, because the referee did not signal them to enter the field to provide treatment for the referee, they were unable to enter the field.

It was not until the fourth referee reminded the main referee that the main referee asked them to roll over quickly to stop the bleeding.

After simple treatment, the referee turned over and gave Modric a yellow card.

"Why?" Modric spread his hands, looking very innocent.

Referee: "You attacked the referee."

Modric: "I have never heard of a player being punished after the ball hits the referee. You blocked my pass and I didn't blame you, but you blame me?"

Referee: "That's different, you did it on purpose!"

Modric: "I did it on purpose? Come on, I was looking the other way at the time, I didn't even know where you were, how could I do it on purpose?"

The scene just now was also replaying on the big screen.

Modric's head was indeed looking to the other side at that time.

But as we all know, Modric often looks at Ribery affectionately and then passes the ball to Van Persie.

A piece of scum.

The referee: "You are good at passing the ball without looking at the player. You did it on purpose!"

Modric: "Then why would I do it on purpose?"

Referee: "Because you think I made a bad whistle."

Modric spread his hands: "Well, that's what you said, I didn't say anything."

Referee: "No, no, no, I said you think that, that's not the fact."

Modric: "I don't think so. You can't just make a decision based on your own imagination, otherwise it would be a bit like a black whistle."

The referee was at a loss for words.

And he didn't want to communicate about the black whistle anymore. Every time he talked about it, his heart trembled.

So he cancelled the yellow card penalty on Modric.

Because of this incident, three minutes of extra time were added to the first half.

In the last minute of stoppage time, Pirlo made a lob pass to Inzaghi.

The authentic fox in the penalty area made a dunk and a shot, the way to success is simple.

Barzagli blocked the shot with his back hand.

The football hit him on the arm.

The referee blew the whistle immediately.

Penalty kick!

In this era, the penalties for handball are still rather vague.

Even when VAR was introduced, handball calls were still controversial.

Things like natural drooping, retracting movements, and no blocking intention all seem to make sense, but when you focus on the words and rules, sometimes you lose touch with reality and the game.

An outrageous handball that clearly expanded the defensive range should have been awarded a penalty kick.

It doesn't mean that everything will be fine if you stop.

If you tried to dodge but failed, wouldn't that actually result in an expansion of your defense?

It's like the yellow light theory.

When drivers encounter a yellow light, they should slow down because it means the red light is coming soon, which is fine.

But when the green light lasts for the last few seconds or the yellow light is about to appear, do you need to slow down and wait for the light?

If you have to wait for the green light, then what is the yellow light for?
Back to handball, Barzagli's sideways move with his back turned was not only a standard defensive move, but also did not expand any defensive area.

Looking at the referee's "resolute" decision, Guardiola really couldn't help it this time and made three consecutive mistakes on the scene.

The referee came over and showed Guardiola a second yellow card.

Two yellow cards turned into a red card and Guardiola was sent off the field.

"Fuck! You're such a black bastard..." Ashley Young couldn't stand it anymore and rushed out. As he was cursing, a pile of bird shit suddenly fell from the sky.

He swallowed the rest of his curse words along with the bird shit.

That's why the referee did not give Ashley Young a yellow card.

Because it all happened so quickly, almost no one realized what Ashley Young had just encountered except He Tianqi, Guardiola and the camera who were in a good position.

He Tianqi couldn't help but sigh that there were so many birds in the sky above the Palermo stadium, excreting down every day, but they were unable to bless Ashley Young.

Unexpectedly, this is a good deal for the birds at San Siro.

I don’t know how Ashley Young will explain to the birds in Palermo when he returns.

After all, he was cheating outside!
Ashley Young: …

Similarly, Ashley Young's experience also gave inspiration to Guardiola who was confronting the referee.

"Shh…tui!"

Guardiola spat at the referee and used biological weapons.

The referee was stunned.

Guardiola then turned and walked into the stands.

At this moment, he felt extremely relieved and felt like a hero.

This is ten thousand times more fun than coaching!
He decided that he would be an assistant coach for life.

Only idiots become head coaches.

In the end, Shevchenko scored a penalty kick, changing the score to 1-1.

The first half ended immediately.

Several linesmen and the fourth referee held back the referee, preventing him from arguing with Guardiola as he walked towards the locker room.

One more thing is worse than one less thing.

[Ding! Ashley Young finally ate bird shit, tasted life, and entered a new realm of understanding of football, successfully "awakening"! The player's personal attributes have gained additional growth! ]

He Tianqi was stunned. This...

He then looked at Ashley Young's panel and found that Ashley Young's name had turned purple, indicating "Awakened".

You know what, this color feels more like poisoning.

But in terms of the data panel, Ashley Young gave He Tianqi a surprise.

Among Palermo's players, Ashley Young and Pedro's data panels are the worst.

Therefore, they are weaker than other players at the same level.

And their progress is slower.

He doesn't have a strong presence in the team.

The most intuitive comparison is that Ashley Young was promoted to a star-level player after the Club World Cup.

He is one month older than Valencia and they are at the same level, but Valencia is not only much better than Ashley Young in speed and burst, but his other statistics are also slightly better than Ashley Young.

If Ashley Young's attribute points add up to 100, then Valencia has 120.

Ribery may be around 140 to 150, and Modric should be around 160 when fully developed.

But now, after awakening, Ashley Young's attribute points have surpassed Valencia, reaching almost one hundred and thirty.

With this strength, he can really be exchanged for Grosso.

So during the half-time break, He Tianqi made a direct substitution.

Ashley Young replaces Viana.

Then Ashley Young went to the left and Di Maria played on the right.

In this way, the team really formed a situation where all four wings were flying together.

Ribery, Van Persie, Ashley Young, Di Maria, four fast horses, four wingers... thump, thump, thump, thump!

But during the halftime break, the director also discovered that "diligent Ashley Yanzin had poultry manure" and replayed it frequently.

All major TV stations therefore continued to broadcast this scene.

The fans burst into laughter.

For a time, the popularity of Guagua Tushui and Ashley Young's bird shit soared, ranking first and second on the abstract list.

After the halftime break, the second half begins.

In just two minutes, Ashley Young ignited the whole stadium with a cut-in.

He forced his way past Gattuso.

Gattuso faced Di Maria in the first half and knew that Di Maria would be in trouble once he got physical, so he estimated that Ashley Young would be in the same situation.

As a result, Ashley Young's core strength was also enhanced, allowing him to break through in the confrontation.

Gattuso could only pull down Ashley Young.

Modric took the free kick, but did not pass it directly into the penalty area. Instead, he passed it diagonally to Ashley Young, who was so excited, oh no... he was eating poultry shit.

Ashley Young took a step forward, then facing the attacking Nesta, he moved the ball sideways to the right and took another step, then suddenly passed the ball diagonally back to the left with a shooting technique.

Nesta, who was moving over, perfectly missed the ball that was so close.

The people in Valencia who were sitting next to He Tianqi were all dumbfounded.

My good brother, have you come to your senses?
This pass is not fancy, but it is damn sharp!

What is the sharpest pass?
The defensive player can't touch it!

boom!
Ribery cut inside from the left side without the ball and entered the penalty area, then took a lob shot after receiving the ball.

The football drew a beautiful arc and went into the far corner.

"GOAL! Two to one!"

"After the second half kicked off, Ribery scored a lightning goal!"

"The total score between the two teams has become 3-3! The away goals are the same! From this goal on, AC Milan has completely lost any advantage!"

"He Tianqi's substitution is simply magical!"

"He did not despise Ashley Young for eating bird shit. Instead, he gave the young player a chance to perform, and Ashley Young repaid He Tianqi with his performance!"

"The birds at San Siro did something wrong and bullied Ashley Young, so Ashley Young took out his anger on AC Milan!"

"The bird creditor should pay back the debt, this is reasonable!" "Of course, regarding He Tianqi's use of Ashley Young, it may also be due to the influence of traditional Chinese culture. In the East, there is a saying that describes a person who is very energetic, which is called chicken blood."

"So the liquid on the poultry's body means hard work. Birds have straight intestines, and their excretion is often a mixture of dry and wet, so it makes sense to say liquid."

The stadium commentator obviously has some research on Chinese culture.

Neither those who fully understand nor those who fully understand cannot give such a crazy explanation.

In the 54th minute, Kakara received the ball at the flank. Just as he was about to cross the ball, Ashley Young ran back from the frontcourt and stretched his foot to steal the ball from Kaká.

Kaka counterattacked immediately.

Ashley Young crashed into Carragher, ready to launch a counterattack.

Kaka had no choice but to pull Ashley Young down.

Modric came back to defend and quickly kicked the free kick.

Van Persie was about to have a one-on-one chance.

The referee blew the whistle to stop the game and did not allow a quick start.

Modric was so angry that he jumped on the spot.

In the 62nd minute, Inzaghi received the ball and created a corner kick.

Pirlo takes a corner kick.

Tony heads the ball away.

Modric received the ball and turned around, ready to launch a counterattack.

Kaka brings Modric down again.

The referee showed Kaka a yellow card.

He Tianqi then replaced Di Maria with Valencia.

Ensure sufficient physical strength for the four wings.

And Ashley Young proved that British supercars like Valencia often get better chances in such penalty situations.

Because the British supercar had a very fierce impact and every punch hit the flesh, the referee had no choice but to blow the whistle for a foul of this intensity.

Sometimes the referee can blackmail players who commit fouls that require more skills, like Di Maria.

Not only are Palermo's players improving, but they are also improving their targeting.

He Tianqi's coaching ability and substitution adjustments are also improving.

There is no absolutely fair environment in football.

When you are treated unfairly, you should actively resist off the field and find ways to deal with it on the field.

If any part loses, it won’t be comfortable.

Only when both sides win, it is called a slap in the face!
Anyone who blows the whistle now will be held accountable after the season ends.

Zamparini has been mainly preparing for this matter this season. He wants to make this case an ironclad case.

However, He Tianqi wanted to still win under such circumstances.

Because in the next few years, the competition environment will be even worse.

Opponents both on and off the court will also be stronger.

Right, Guardiola?
Guardiola: What you said should have nothing to do with our six-time champion Barcelona, ​​right?

In the 73rd minute, Ribery dribbled the ball from the wing and passed it back to Modric.

Modric made a large transfer to the right, looking for Valencia.

Facing Serginho's defense, Valencia kicked the ball ten meters away.

No tricks, all speed.

The words "I'm going to eat you alive" were practically written on his face.

However, time makes people grow old.

Serginho, who was also a fast horse when he was young, was really helpless when he met the youthful Valencia.

Can't outrun.

Can't hit it.

Can't pull it.

Can't be pushed down.

Valencia successfully overtook.

After cutting inside and approaching the penalty area, he made a cross pass to Tony.

Toni tried hard to push away Stam who was marking him, but did not touch the ball.

This is the strongest form of the fulcrum center, who can pass the ball to his teammates even without touching the ball!
The football rolled to the left side of the penalty area.

Ashley Young rushed over and shot the ball at his sweet spot!
This is the famous "Ashley Young" area!
Swish!
The football was stuck in the dead center.

Karachi is like a decoration!
"GOAL! Ashley Young scores a world-class goal!"

"The score of this game is 3-1! The total score is 4-3! Palermo reversed AC Milan!"

"Ashley Young once said that his best friend in Palermo is Valencia! And the two of them are very similar in skin color, hairstyle and appearance, just like two brothers."

"Manchester United fans were very fond of Valencia before, and recently they also liked Ashley Young very much. They strongly suggested that Ferguson buy the devil wingers."

"So on the Internet, everyone calls them the Manchester United brothers! People believe that after they join Manchester United, they will become the kings of Manchester United's left and right wingers!"

"In the first two years, they didn't have much chance to appear on the court at the same time. But this season they are both more mature and stronger, and they are beginning to participate frequently and decide the game!"

"The most important point is that their style of play is very pragmatic. This makes Manchester United fans, who are fed up with the flashy Ronaldo, extremely eager for them."

"If he can't perform well in the World Cup and prove his commercial value, Manchester United might really give up Ronaldo and bring in the Manchester United brothers!"

Palermo's sharp speed left the referee no time to think about how to whistle.

The penalties have therefore become normal.

In the 79th minute, Pirlo tried a long shot from the outside, but was caught by Van der Sar.

In the 82nd minute, He Tianqi replaced Tony with Mido.

Ancelotti also replaced Seedorf with Vogel.

Replace Serginho with Rui Costa to add an offensive player and try again.

Unfortunately, the effect is not obvious.

In the 88th minute, Ashley Young, who was in great form today, did not find many good opportunities after circling Ribery and going down the flank.

In the past he might have just passed the ball directly.

But now he knows how to pass the ball back and allow his teammates to create better chances.

Carragher made a long pass to the right, but his footwork was a bit poor and the ball was a bit deep.

Fortunately, Van Persie caught up with the ball near the baseline and made a horizontal pass.

The passing lanes were terrible.

Stam cleared the ball easily.

Modric stopped the ball outside the right side of the penalty area. Vogel rushed over and knocked the ball away, then fell to the ground with Modric.

The football rolled in the opposite direction of the penalty area and the crisis seemed to be resolved.

But the next moment, Valencia rushed over and shot the ball.

This position is quite remote, probably about thirty meters away from the goal, which is not a good opportunity to shoot at all.

However, Valencia doesn't think about this at all now.

He had only one thought in his mind: my brother drives a Land Rover, so I must at least drive a Leopard 5!

It can’t be too far off!

Swish!
The football hit the net, creating layers of white waves.

The speed is scary.

"GOAL! GOAL! GOAL!"

"Super World Wave!"

"Valencia's tiger-like shot almost went through the net!"

"Too powerful!"

"Manchester United fans have always thought that his shooting skills are among the top five in the world! But now, I think he is one of the best players in the world with long-range shots!"

"Look at his thighs. They have absolute speed and absolute power. Any kick from him is a killer!"

"With all four wings of Palermo flying together, the impact is unmatched!"

"AC Milan was torn to pieces."

"Although the penalty decision in the first half was quite controversial, with the appearance of Ashley Young and Valencia, all the controversy was turned into ashes."

"They used absolute speed to gain an absolute advantage for Palermo!"

"4-1 in this match, 5-3 on aggregate! Milan need to score three goals to reverse the situation, which is simply impossible."

"Valencia killed the game!"

"Congratulations to Palermo, they have successfully advanced to the semi-finals of the Italian Cup!"

"They have reached the semi-finals of the Italian Cup for four consecutive years! And in the three years before that, they were champions!"

"Can they achieve an unprecedented fourth consecutive title in this tournament?"

……

"Roma Sports Daily": "The substitutes are the best! Ashley Young and Valencia came off the bench and both assisted and scored. The former was named the man of the match! The latter scored a world-class goal!"

"Gazzetta dello Sport": "Ashley Yanzin's explosive performance eliminated the Rossoneri, AC Milan issued a bird ban at San Siro! Don't let outsiders get away with it!"

Turin Sports Daily: "It is extremely vicious to kill for money! He Tianqi stopped the team doctor and refused to help the referee, which is against the spirit of humanitarianism!"

"The Future": "Guardiola spat at the referee after being sent off with a red card, and he may be subject to an additional suspension!"

"Corriere dello Sport": "The Italian Football Association has set up a special investigation team to investigate whether Modric deliberately attacked the referee with a football. If it is confirmed, he may be banned!"

The Sun also joined in the fun: "Mysterious power from the East helps the British Empire wake up! Ashley Young will never be the same again!"

"In Chinese legend, there is a god called Arhat who subdues dragons. His incarnation on earth is called Jigong. He rubs the dirt on his body into mud balls and gives them to people who are suffering to eat. Even an idiot will become a genius after eating them."

Ashley Young: ???
"And the story of Ashley Young eating a piece of bird droppings that fell from the sky in the second leg of the Italian Cup quarter-final that just ended is similar to this legend."

“Every year, incredible things happen in this world, but they tend to be concentrated around a few key figures.”

“Miracles are always happening in Palermo, and many ancient myths appear before us in a new form.”

“This is the cycle of history.”

“Two thousand years ago, God sent Jesus to walk the earth.”

"A thousand years ago, Arhat the Dragon Subduer transformed into Jigong to save people from suffering."

"Now, He Tianqi has come to the football world. Which kind of god are you?"

These media outlets all avoided the main issue and seemingly boasted about Palermo, but in fact they covered up the outrageous penalties made by AC Milan in the first half.

At the post-match press conference, a reporter questioned He Tianqi about preventing the team doctor from treating the referee.

He Tianqi said: "Based on the referee's penalty measures against us in this game, I am very worried that the team will be given a yellow card, a red card or even a direct defeat after the team doctor enters the stadium without permission."

"As we all know, the Italian Cup has a different meaning for us. It is the starting point of our fortune, so we are unwilling to take risks in this sacred competition."

"I heard that the Italian Football Association is going to investigate whether Modric deliberately attacked the referee. So I'd like to apply for this as well. I hope this special team will check the referee's decision in this game."

"We think there's a lot to be said for this."

"Including the additional punishment for Guardiola, these can all be examined together. If there is a problem, I will never tolerate it and will deal with it as it should be dealt with."

"By the way, there are also several games during Guardiola's coaching period. I suggest that they be included in the scope of investigation and Guardiola, Modric and others should be investigated carefully."

"I can't understand the truth without checking the players. I can't rest assured. Palermo can't have morally corrupt players."

Shortly afterwards, the Italian Football Association announced the dissolution of the special investigation team, believing that it was impossible for Modric to deliberately attack the referee.

Guardiola did not receive any additional punishment other than the red card. The Football Association explained that Guardiola was too excited at the time and spitting everywhere, but he had no malicious intention of spitting, and this situation was very normal.

Guardiola himself couldn't hold it in.

After all, he himself felt that the "old phlegm pickled cabbage" was obvious and disgusting.

The Italian Football Association’s writing skills are still too strong.

They said everything black was white.

I admire you.

Subsequently, under the deliberate guidance of the Italian Football Association, the influence of Ashley Young's sudden miracle spread.

Especially many superstitious African players are said to often stand under the tree "waiting for wind, rain and it."

A 13-year-old youth player from the French amateur football club Roissy-en-Brie, who was visiting his hometown, heard the legend and "waited for it" under the tree with his twin brothers.

Their names are Pogba Six, Pogba Seven and Pogba!
The older brothers were too selfish. They occupied advantageous positions and grabbed the bird droppings, but Pogba missed it.

This made a huge difference to the future careers of the three of them.

……

February 5th to February 19th.

Palermo won four consecutive Serie A games!

Defeated Reggina, Lazio, Empoli, Chievo.

Overtake Inter Milan in the standings!
Next, they will fly to the Bernabeu to compete with Real Madrid in the Champions League!
(End of this chapter)