After being universally criticized online, I went viral on military-themed variety shows.

Chapter 1 Mandarin Ducks Playing in the Water? Better to Stuff Their Mouths with Slippers

Canglan Realm.

On an unremarkable mountaintop.

The man's robes were stained with blood. He held a long sword that was still dripping blood and knelt on one knee, as if he was already exhausted.

Upon seeing this, the swarming pursuers were overjoyed and shouted wildly at the top of their lungs.

"You devil, you've finally met your match!"

"You have no other way out, so surrender!"

"Break your demonic sword, and we'll leave you with a whole corpse!"

……

The longsword trembled impatiently in the man's hand.

But then he was suddenly flicked lightly, "Quiet!"

It's still quiet? This old lady can't stand this. She just wants to physically silence those annoying flies!
It started shaking even more violently.

I won't listen! Let me go! Watch me go out and wreak havoc on the battlefield!

"If you shake it again, it'll melt, you believe me?"

Nobody would believe that! I don't believe you'd be willing to do that!

"Ho!"

The man couldn't help but chuckle softly.

Just then, the originally clear sky suddenly darkened, and the overwhelming power of the heavens pressed down abruptly.

"Oh no, it's divine punishment! This demon has actually attracted divine punishment!"

"He'll be annihilated body and soul under divine punishment. He wants to leave us all here. What a madman!"

"Retreat! Retreat quickly!"

"late!"

With a cheerful announcement, a barrage of thunder crashed down, instantly covering the entire mountaintop.

In a moment of desperation, Changjian tried to shake off the man's hand to shield him from the lightning without thinking, but was pinned to the spot by an even greater force.

"You are not the Demon Sword. You are the Shadow Sword, not the Light-Bearing Sword!"

"I'm tired, girl, you're free!"

When the voices faded away, there was no more sound on the scorched mountaintop.

Only one sword was protected intact.

She spun around in place for a moment, then without hesitation followed the lingering scent...

You think you can just abandon her? No way!
***
"Glug, glug glug..."

A string of dense bubbles suddenly appeared in the bathtub filled with cold water.

Immediately afterwards, a wet head suddenly popped out from under the water.

Before Jiang Hanying could figure out what was going on, she heard a frantic knocking on the door.

"Miss Jiang? Jiang Hanying? It's been almost half an hour, are you still not done cleaning up?"

"Hurry up and come out after you're all ready. I've prepared a bottle of red wine. We didn't have enough to drink earlier, so let's have another glass when we get out!"

"There's no point in being coy now that things have come to this. My patience is running out!"

"If you don't make a sound, I'm going to barge in!"

Jiang Hanying wiped the water off her face, disgusted by the sound.

She was originally a sword spirit. If her cheap master hadn't first concealed the fact that she had triggered a heavenly punishment, and then dusted off his sleeves and abandoned her, would she have been so angry that she had spent tens of thousands of years searching for him across countless planes without sleep?

At first, I thought I had been transformed into human form unexpectedly. It turns out I got a body for free and also received the memories left by the original owner before his death.

Naturally, they would then know who was knocking on the door.

Mr. Ge, whose full name is Ge Dahai, is known as the super-rich financial backer of the entertainment industry.

In reality, he's a complete scoundrel!
Behind the scenes, they have harmed countless naive young girls.

Perhaps there are also young men.

Coupled with that greasy voice, isn't it just a deliberate attempt to disgust her?
Not hearing a response from the bathroom, the knocking became increasingly loud.

"Don't pretend to be a chaste and virtuous woman. You should have been mentally prepared when you first entered this circle."

"Let me tell you, threatening suicide won't work on me!"

"I'm going to break down the door! I'm really going to!"

"Splash!" Jiang Hanying impatiently picked at her ear and stood up from the bathtub.

It took me a little while to get used to moving around on my legs at first, but I quickly got the hang of it.

This sword spirit is just that clever!
Just as she was about to open the door, she remembered what the owner had said about the difference between men and women, so she grabbed a white bathrobe hanging on the clothes rack next to her, unfolded it, put it on, and tied the belt around her waist.

She shook her still-dripping hair, walked over, and casually opened the door.

"Wait, cough, are you getting impatient?"

Ge Dahai was already poised to ram the door.

The door suddenly opened, and he stumbled slightly.

But when he looked up and saw the beautiful, delicate face emerging from the water, and the exquisite figure that even the bathrobe couldn't conceal, the anger on his face instantly turned into a lewd grin. "So that's why it took so long. You even took a bath. The bathtub in this suite is big enough for two people to bathe together. But it's okay, we'll still need to shower afterward, let's have a romantic swim together..."

Unable to contain his excitement any longer, he opened his arms and pounced on her.

Just as Ge Dahai's face was filled with a dreamy expression as he imagined a soft, warm body embracing him, a slender white leg and a delicate, white foot appeared in his field of vision.

The next second, his still-wet little feet landed on his chest, and he was sent flying backward at an even faster speed.

He collapsed to the ground, dazed and confused, after his back hit the wall with a dull thud.

Jiang Hanying patted the hem of her bathrobe and rubbed her feet on the carpet.

Her feet weren't dirty; she just wanted to wipe away the greasy feeling from when her soles touched that big lump of fat.

"How was that? Was it satisfying enough? You're so disgusting-looking, yet you have such high and mighty dreams!"

Cool water droplets dripped onto his face, bringing Ge Dahai back to his senses.

He looked up and met a pair of eyes full of contempt, as if looking at a pile of stinking garbage. Anger surged within him, and without thinking, he blurted out, "You son of a bitch..."

The last three words, "wanting to rebel," were never uttered.

Seeing him open his mouth, Jiang Hanying casually grabbed a pair of unworn disposable slippers, rolled them up, and stuffed them into his mouth.

"You should shut your mouth since it stinks!"

Ge Dahai had just realized what was happening when he hurriedly raised his hand to pull the slipper out of his mouth.

Jiang Hanying glanced around but there was nothing she could easily grab, so she reluctantly lifted her foot again.

Two afterimages flashed by.

After a suppressed groan, Ge Dahai's arms, which he had just raised, fell limply to his sides before they even touched the slipper in his mouth.

A hint of genuine fear finally surfaced in those bulging, beady green eyes.

After the pain subsided, he lost all feeling in his arm!
Broken, broken?

Seeing that this piece of trash had finally behaved itself a bit, Jiang Hanying took a moment to look around the room.

To be honest, the room is quite nicely decorated.

Red wine and candles, there was even a swing in the room, and some exquisite little trinkets on the bed that she couldn't name.

She walked over and casually picked up a small red leather whip.

Ge Dahai was struggling to stand up, but he couldn't use his arms and was crawling on the ground like a maggot.

Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Jiang Hanying walking towards him with a small leather whip in her hand, and his movements froze.

Halfway back, Jiang Hanying noticed a small gadget with a flashing red light on the cabinet opposite the bed. She picked it up and examined it curiously. "What's this? Oh, you're planning to record this?"

Ge Dahai shook his head frantically.

He's not, he doesn't!
Jiang Hanying smiled kindly at him, and seeing the screen light up displaying "Enable recording mode?", she casually clicked "Yes".

Of course, the camera was focused on Ge Dahai.

Walking up to Ge Dahai, who was still frantically pupaing on the ground, Jiang Hanying held the equipment in one hand and waved a small leather whip in the other.

It was just a toy whip, but she managed to make it whistle as she casually swung it.

The second blow landed on Ge Dahai's chest.

In just one moment, the expensive silk shirt was reduced to shreds, and the white, flabby flesh wrapped in the fabric was squeezed out.

The skin turned red at a visible speed, and soon became a purplish-red color.

Ge Dahai shuddered violently, and even though his mouth was completely gagged, he managed to squeeze out a scream from his throat: "Ouch!"

Hearing this, Jiang Hanying's smile widened: "Do you like it? Then let's have some more!"

"Snapped!"

"Ow!"

Duet, begin!
(End of this chapter)